How was it possible that tough guy was me? It's me! I could recollect those flashes of the past event. 

"Siddharth, you mind your own business don't interrupt." Gautam was scowling, and I glared at me. 

"Withdraw your hand and I will walk off," making a deal. 

"Yeh matter mere aur junior ke beech mein hai, don't interrupt." Not backing off, I shoved his hand away in infuriation. 

"Yeh matter tumhare aur ek ladki ke beech mein hai, I have to interrupt as you were going to slap the girl." Boiling in anger and frustration, I never adored his personality. Too much self-centred and considered himself superior to rest. 

"Siddharth, why you have to fake as if you're hero and me the villain? Tere yeh drama mein se sayad ladkiya aur flat ho jaye but tu real mein hero nahi banega." He was mocking at me, as his respect was at sake. The whole school was witnessing the insult. 

"Tu ban hero, mujhe koi interest nahi. But kya kare hero bane ki jagah villain mein zayada interest dikha raha hai aaj kaal. Ladkiyo par haat utna koi hero giri mujhe toh nahi lagti," that caused some individuals to chuckle at him. 

"Tu apni limit mein rah samjhe..." he stepped towards me, clutching my collar. I was going to push him in exasperation but the canteen staff came in between and the argument came to a halt. 

Was that girl Sana? How I overlooked the fact? I don't even remember the girl face, had I even glanced at her? I was sitting over there with the only person, I had a connection at that time. Karthik, I knew only him among the crowd of strangers. At that moment my sight went on Gautam arguing with a girl, and I couldn't overlook the fact that he was on the verge of slapping her. I walked towards them, to escape the girl from that moron. 

I turned the page, but nothing further was written down. I riffled through the pages, in an attempt to find any clue but I was at lose. How could it be possible? The entire diary had just two pages written, I glanced at the pages it was so less in number. Were the pages ripped? But who did it? Why would her parents hide such a matter? They too might be unaware of it. My sight went on the last page and over there it was written. 

Mai Phir Bhi Tumko Chahungi... 
Mai Phir Bhi Tumko Chahungi...

I gazed at the page, my hands caressing those words. Eyes turned moist, those words were meant for me. She loved me beyond I could envision, murmuring those two sentence repetitively. 

The knob turned and I knew someone was entering inside, I gazed at the door. Raghav walked in, closing the door behind him. "What's the matter?" He whispered as if scared someone might catch him. 

"Raghav... I am the Kullu that Sana used to mention..." I found it hard as the revelation was troubling me. She was in my life much before her condition got worse, and as her father mentioned Kullu been the reason behind him losing his daughter. 

"Sid, you don't know the entire truth. Kullu Sana ke life mein tumhare aane se phele tha, mujhe laga papa sab bata diya hoga. He was in her life...." 

"Seven years back, ya sayad before that. I know it Raghav, uncle ji ne sab clear kar diya hai." He looked at me amazed, "par yeh diary read karne ke baad I know it's me. It was always me, aur sirf mai hi responsible hu uske state ka... Mai..." I paused on seeing Mr Gill on the door. 

"Ap kaise responsible ho sakte ho? Kya bol rahe hai, Siddharth?" He sounded confused. 

"Kuch nahi! Bro is just worried about Sana, you know that he knocked her down. And he always felt that he was responsible for the condition, doctor bhi na aaj kaal." Raghav wrapped the conversation in a way, that Mr Gill didn't get a doubt. 

"Beta ji, ap bhi na..." Mr Gill shook her head, and stepped towards us again. "You're not at fault, Sana ki halat phele se hi thi aisi. Apko mile se phele, wahi toh reason tha ki hum ne usko humare sath Canada le gaye. Jab hum ko..." He paused for a second controlling his emotions. Raghav stepped towards him, rubbing his shoulder. 

"That was the moment jab unko Sana ki suicide attempt ka pata chal." I stumbled back on knowing it, she attempted to suicide but why? 

"Kyu?" I needed to know, I needed to know every piece of her past. Was I the reason behind it? 

"Kyu?" Mr Gill imitated my tone, in anger. "Who else would be responsible? It was that Kullu... the man who destroyed her life." The hate radiating from Mr Gill eyes, how would he behave when he would know the truth? 

"Hum nahi jante," Raghav tried to calm my inner-turmoil which he knew could explode soon. 

"What you mean by hum nahi jante?" Mr Gill got engaged on him, "he is the one due to whom her condition is such." 

"But papa if hume Sana ke past ke bare mein kuch pata hi na ho toh hum kisi par bhi blame nahi kar sakte. Ha! I agree Sana ka past mein woh admi tha, but woh kaha tak accountable hai yeh hume ya toh Sana... ya woh ladka bata sakta hai." 

"Tum Shehnaaz ki tarah baat math karo, I know that man is responsible aur meko usko blame karne se koi nahi rokh sakta." Mr Gill was turning infuriated with each passing second, "bus mujhe pata chal jaye ki woh ladka hai koun?" 

"Mai..." I wanted to disclose the matter to him, don't want to keep anything hidden from him or any of the member. Hearing it Mr Gill looked at me getting stunned. 

"Mai... he means that he will help you, kyu hai na Sid?" Raghav again attempted to cover it up and didn't provide me with any chance to open mine. 

"You're perfect guy; your mom is blessed to have you. Ya Phir thode ladke hote hai jo sirf dusro ka dil todna jante hai." Those words pierced my heart, he was praising me at the same time cursing me. 

"Mujhe lagta hai humko jana chahiye, Sara was searching Sid. Kahi woh yaha tak na aa jaye," Raghav dragged me out. I was going to hand back the diary on the bed when Mr Gill halted me. 

"You're free to take it along with you, she had written a few instances of past but still it might help." He was staring with a hope underlying in his eyes, the hope that he might soon get his Sana back. 

I took the diary along with me, and as the Raghav's grip on my wrist loosens. I stopped him on his track, we were a yield away from Mr Gill's room. 

"Why you lied in front of Mr Gill?" I was roaring, he had to test my patience. "Why you didn't let me speak the truth?" 

"What truth were you going to utter in front of him? Kya batana chahte the Sid? yahi na ki mai hi hu woh ladka. Phir kya? Woh tere pe gussa ho jata aur shaddi ho jane ke baad Sana ko apne sath le jata. Tereko lagta hai, woh tereko Sana ko dekhne bhi dete? Kabhi nahi! Sana waise hi rehti jo woh aaj hai. Tujhe malum bhi hai, tu sach bata kar Sana ki life danger mein dalne ja raha tha." 

"But uska gussa fair hai, mai hu responsible for her state." I looked away from him, taking a step forward. 

"And may I know, how? Tujhe kaise pata ki woh ladka tu hai?" He was not certain that I was speaking the truth. 

"Kyuki, Sana had mentioned the guy in her diary. Aur woh incident mujhe yaad hai, but humari kabhi baat nahi huvi. We were studying in same Delhi school par yaar, how could she love me without me knowing her existence? Isn't it something insane?" I couldn't believe the fact and the suicide attempt why she did that?  

"Pyaar... ka dusra nam hi insane hai. Aur mai janta hu ki mujhe yeh tumhe batane ki zaurat nahi, but teri baato se ke baat toh clear hai ki tujhe uske past ka koi idea nahi." Raghav sounded disappointed, "humne socha tha ki Sana ka Kullu hi hume uske past se rooh-b-rooh karega. But yaha toh kuch aur hi locha hai, yeh hi reason tha Shehnaaz ne Punjab ko chose kara, for destination marriage. Taki humko uske life ka kuch glimpse mil sake." Unfolding some secrets which were kept hidden from me before. 

"Shehnaaz ko kaise malum that I could be the cure?" I inquired getting shocked.

"Sana after suicide attempt used to not bring a word out. Uske piche reason tha, uska brain severely inquired hogaya tha. Doctor ne bata diya tha ki she might turn aloof and agar baat bhi karegi toh she won't be mentally fit. Case hi nahi hai, kyuki train usko hit karne wali thi but just due to her friend woh bach gayi, aur usse dost ne apni jaan gawa di." And his each words were breaking me apart, "sirf woh dus din jo woh tere sath thi sayad tab hi woh kuch boli thi after five years." I nodded agreeing with his words and assuring him that he was correct.

"Jab Sana ne Navya ko pukara toh dono surprised hogaye the. They never thought a day would come when they will hear her voice, bus woh khushi kuch hi moments ki thi. Kyuki buhot jald Sana ko apne Kullu ki yaad aagayi, but unko kaha pata tha ki woh Kullu hai koun?" Raghav's eyes were moist and that showed the pain everyone had gone through just due to me.

"Sana ko apne aas-paas log nahi chahiye, the reason usko room mein akele rahna pasand hai. If koi uske paas bhi jata hai toh she turn insane, aur sirf woh pills usko shant kara sakti hai. Toh woh changes jo Cupcake ne kuch minute ke liye witness Kara was enough to built a hope inside, they have that hope in you. Please apne liye ya Sana ke liye nahi balki usse family ke liye tereko yeh conceal rakna hoga. Jab tak tu ek hasti khelti Sana unko wapas nahi kar deta." I nodded, I needed to keep things concealed from them. I was the reason and I needed to put back the things together. But how?

"Yaar meko toh lag raha hai ki kisiko jeetne ki interest hai hi nahi." Sara walked towards us groaning, "tum dono ko pata bhi hai Shehbaaz ne apne team ko tayar kar diya hai. Aur tum dono yaha bromance mein busy ho. Yaar meko Shehbaaz se nahi defeat hona, and if mai huvi toh you will have to pay for it." She was giving us a warning look, we both glanced at each other. "Yaar ek dusre ko stare karna chod do, and bro..." she looked at Raghav, "ab toh change ho javo warna mai Shehnaaz ko bol dungi ki apse shaadi na kare as you're more interested in Sid..." she couldn't complete it as Raghav started chasing her and she tired her level best to escape from him. 

As I was going to follow her, my sight went on the room. She might be alone confined in the room and I grinned as an idea popping in my mind. "It mind help!" 

TO BE CONTINUED...

How was the part? 

What idea had popped in Sid's mind? Any guesses? 

Hmm... What next? What about those page of the diary? Who did that? 

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