Eileen Flat Screen
At City College, a billboard reads "Modern Dance Competition Today". Eileen performs an interpretive-type dance in a pink suit with the audience, including (Y/n), Mordecai, Rigby, and Anna watching. After the dance ended with Eileen diving into a garbage can to set off a party popper, the audience excitedly cheers for her. The announcer appears on stage. The announcer laughs. "Okay; let me get a "honk-honk" in here 'cause you goosed it!" He said.
A guy managing the soundboard honks his horn twice, prompting the goose to fly away from the announcer. "It's time to announce the winner of the City College Modern Dance Competition." A pigeon flies by to give the man an envelope. "Now, I don't want to "pigeon-hold" anyone, but first place today goes to Eileen Roberts with the dance "Chewed Gum"! Eileen screams excitedly and runs onto the stage. The audience cheers. "To say you blew away the competition wouldn't be Ostrich." Eileen squeals/screams again. "Let's see how well you dance after a year of sitting in front of your very own flat screen T.V.!" the announcer said. Eileen does another joyous squeal.
"This is the best thing that's ever happened to me!" She said. "Ei-leen flat-screen! Ei-leen flat-screen!" (Y/n), Mordecai, Rigby, and Anna chanted. "Thanks for coming everyone, and for all of you losers today, don't Rooster (Brewster) on your laurels 'cuz there's always next year!" The announcer pulls out a rooster and it crows. "Eileen, that was awesome!" Anna said as they caught up to her at the entrance. "Yeah! I knew you were going to win when you came out of that gum wrapper." Mordecai said. "Nice work, Eiloin!" (Y/n) joked. "Heh heh. Thanks, guys. Aah! I was never into TV before, but that was just cause I didn't have the right equipment. I wish I could go watch it right now, but I got to get to work." She replied. "Don't worry about it Eileen. I'll drop it off at your place for ya." (Y/n) said. "Really?" Eileen asked. "Yeah, of course!" (Y/n) said.
"Wow, thanks (Y/n)! I gotta run, see you guys later!" Eileen said. "Bye!" Anna waved. "Later!" Mordecai said. "Give me a hand with this, will ya Mordecai?" (Y/n) asked. He lifts the TV box. "That was really nice of you to offer to help Eileen." He said. "Well yeah, she's a close friend. And I'm not actually gonna drop it off." (Y/n) said. Mordecai drops box after hearing this.
"What?! (Y/n) Eileen worked hard for this, you can't just-" he began. "Relax, dude. I'm not just gonna drop it off. I'm gonna install it for her, to surprise her when she gets home from work." (Y/n) corrected. Anna exchanges looks with Mordecai. "You are?" She asked. "We can watch some flat-screen, maybe get some pizza. It'll be awesome!" (Y/n) said. "That will be awesome!" Anna said. "Yeah sure sounds like it! Can I help? I want to help!" Rigby said, and (Y/n) chuckles. "Sure, Rigby." She said. "Wow Rigby, that might be the nicest thing you've ever done." Mordecai said. "Like you said, she worked hard for this. Be careful Mordecai, there's a step behind you."
Rigby said. "Okay. That's enough dude. You're freaking me out." Mordecai said. The gang go to Eileen's house. "Hang on, let me get the key." (Y/n) grabs Eileen's key under a garden turtle figurine. "You know where Eileen keeps her house key?" Rigby asked her. "Yeah, I water her plants sometimes when she goes out of town for a dance invitational or whatever." (Y/n) said. She unlocks the door, and they go inside to find a Hanatronic TV sitting on top of a cabinet. "Wait, I thought Eileen didn't have a TV." Anna said. "Oh she doesn't. That's Joanne's." (Y/n) said.
"Who's Joanne?" Mordecai asked. "Eileen's new roommate. She's this beast who leaves all her junk everywhere and uses Eileen's hand towels to dry her butt." (Y/n) said, and Rigby cringes. "Ew!" He said. Anna grabs a snow globe with Joanne kissing her cat inside it. "Is this her?" She hands over the snow globe to (Y/n). "Ugh, yeah! That's her alright." She stares angrily at the snow globe. "What a donkey! You know she ate an entire thing of Eileen's peanut butter but she won't even let her near the TV? One time we were just hangin' out..."
a flashback begins with her and Eileen sitting on her couch. Eileen is doing string figures with her fingers while (Y/n) checks her watch as it beeps. She gasps. "It's starting! The Carter and Briggs Reunion Special!" She rushes to the TV to turn it on, but Eileen stops her. "Wait, (Y/n), don't!....Not here." Elieen said. "But there's a TV sitting in front of us and a Carter and Briggs Special going on inside it!" (Y/n) said, at this Eileen giggles. "Wow (Y/n), Rigby has really rubbed off on you." She said, and she blushes a bit. "Huh?" (Y/n) asked in confusion. "Anyway, I'm sure it will be fine, come on." (Y/n) said.
Eileen sighs. "Okay, I guess since Joanne's out of town it'll be alright?" As she turns on the TV with a remote, Joanne appeared beside the couch. "I knew it!" Joanne shouted. "Joanne! I thought you were at the beach!" Elieen said. " I was at the beach, until I realized something like this might happen! How could I enjoy the surf and sun knowing you could be here, messing with my TV?!" She replied.
"Hey lay off her, okay? This was MY idea." (Y/n) said. "Next time, that remote will be your face, chipmunk. To clarify, next time I'll slap your face." The flashback ends. "I didn't even make that up, that's exactly what happened." (Y/n) said as she hands Anna the snow globe. Rigby looked angry, and (Y/n) probably knew why. "Ok, sooo I guess we shouldn't touch any of Joanne's stuff." Anna sets the snow globe down. "Yeah, I think we just put the flat screeeeenn..." (Y/n) looks around. " ...on the wall over here, it'll be cool!" She said.
Mordecai walks over towards Joanne's TV. "I can't believe she still has one of these junky old Hanatronic's." He looks closely at it. "This must be first generation it's so old." He said. "I told ya she's a beast." (Y/n) said. "Her TV's probably too scared to die on her." Rigby said, and (Y/n) snickers. "Let me just grab my tools so we can get mounting." She said. "Oh, I think I can help with that!" Rigby takes out a tool belt and puts it around his waist. "Wow, Rigby, those almost look real." Anna and Mordecai then laugh softly together, and (Y/n) rolls her eyes. Mordecai points at Rigby's rope whip, still laughing softly. "What's up with the whip? You gonna use it on (Y/n) or something?" He asked. Rigby and (Y/n)'s eyes widen in shock, and both blush like crazy.
"Dude!" Rigby snapped, and Anna burst into laughter. "Uncool..." (Y/n) mumbled. "Kidding, kidding." Mordecai said, putting his hands up quickly in defense. "It's my utility whip! It was a thousand uses." Rigby smiles while looking at it. "(Y/n) and I got it at a Renaissance fair." He said. "When did you go to a Ren. fair?" Mordecai puts his wings up. "And why are you two always hanging out without me?!" He asked. (Y/n) looks at him in disbelief.
"Dude, really?" She asked. "You and Anna are always together doing your thing! What are we supposed to do, hang out by ourselves?!" Rigby asked. Anna pushes Mordecai away from Rigby. "Hey, hey, cool it. Rigby, show us your whipping skills. And (Y/n) too while you're at it." Anna smirks. "STOP TALKING!" (Y/n) shouted, and Anna and Mordecai laugh. Rigby takes it out and whips. "WhaCHA!" It whips the snow globe, breaking it. The three stand there, speechless, and (Y/n) sighs and face palms. "Uuuuuhhh, let's focus on putting up that flat screen." Anna said.
Mordecai and Anna pull out the T.V. from the box, then (Y/n) pulls out a small bag of nails and bolts. Then Rigby starts playing with a hammer, when it hits him in the face, and (Y/n) chuckles, then he puts it away. Anna is shown making a small hole in the wall using a drill. The hole soon gives in and creates a bigger one. (Y/n) pulls out a bucket of plaster. Mordecai hands Rigby a scraper, but he turns it down and instead uses his whip to get it on the hole. In the process,
(Y/n), Anna and Mordecai get covered in it as well. Mordecai starts to put the mantle up, when he points toward a screwdriver. He gestures to Rigby to get it and Rigby uses his whip to pass it. The screwdriver ends up above Mordecai's head. Then he gives Rigby an angry glare and they start to argue. Later, (Y/n) puts the screws in and Anna puts up more of the mantle. They take a break and goof off for a bit. They put empty plaster buckets on their heads. Anna does the robot, Mordecai holds a broom, and Rigby whips his rope around. Finally, they put the TV up.
"Eileen flat screeeeeeeenn!" The group said. "Now to plug it in and try it out." (Y/n) picks up the plug and is about to plug it into the outlet, when she notices that Joanne's TV's plug is taking up the whole outlet. "UGH! Joanne's giant plug is pluggin' up the whole plug!" She said. "Just move it down to the bottom, they'll both fit." Anna said. (Y/n) is about to move the plug, but Rigby interjects. "Isn't there another outlet in here?" He asked, stopping (Y/n) from moving the plug. Mordecai kneels down under the computer desk. "This one's looks kinda full...." He said.
"Alright, whatever! I'm not gonna be threatened by some socket hog!" She rearranges the plugs, now happier. "And that's that." Then Joanne shows up at the door, angry. "What are you doing?!" She asked, and (Y/n) faces her. "AAHH! JOANNE!" She shouted. Rigby instantly turns to glare at her. "Did you touch my TV?" Joanne asked. "No." (Y/n) said. Joanne walks towards her, and jabs a finger into her chest. "You better not, because the hand that touches my TV is a hand you'll never get back. And by that, I mean I'm ripping it off your body and keeping it." She said. Rigby growls, then steps in front of (Y/n). "Hey! Leave her alone!" He shouted. "Look Joanne, I didn't-"
(Y/n) began. "What's that?" Joanne asked, and Rigby quickly covers the outlet. "What's what?" He asked. Joanne walks forward. "Move it, shrimp!" She said, and (Y/n) growls at her for that. "No, wait!" Joanne shoves him, then notices the moved plugs. "I KNEW IT! You mess with my TV; I mess with yours!" She jumps onto the flat screen on the wall, takes it down, and runs away with it.
"NO, NOT THE FLAT SCREEN!" (Y/n) shouted. Joanne runs out the door, Mordecai runs after her but stops at the doorway. "Joanne, stop! We can talk this out!" He shouted. After a couple seconds, he turns toward (Y/n), Anna and Rigby. "She's already halfway up the street." He said. Joanne is running past the house. She then runs towards an old man in his car. "Get out." She said. "Is everything alright?" The old man asked. "I said get out!!" Joanne pulls the old guy out the car window, and shoves him on the sidewalk. "Aaaaahh!!! OWW!....Don't hurt me." Joanne puts the flat screen in the car, gets in the driver's seat and drives away.
"Come on Rigby, let's go!" (Y/n) sees Rigby carrying Joanne's T.V. "Dude, why are you bringing that thing?!" She asked. "If she's gonna mess with Eileen's flat screen, we're gonna mess with her Hanatronic!" Rigby puts the T.V. in the back and gets in the car after it. Anna backs the car up and drives down the road. Joanne sees them in her rearview mirror. "OOOOHH, Joanne's gonna slap a face today!" She speeds up and breathes angrily. "Where is she even going?!" Anna asked. "There's no way to know. She doesn't think like the rest of us.
Just follow her!" (Y/n) shouted. Joanne takes a sharp right and Anna follows her. Joanne notices that they are still following her. "UUUUUGGGHHH!" She pulls out a bottle of "Anti-Itch Medication Lotion" and chucks it out the window. Mordecai sees it coming toward the windshield. "Look out!" It impacts with the windshield and smears all over it. "AAAAHHH!" Mordecai and Anna shouted. Anna uses windshield wipers and clears it of and glares. "Nice try." She said. Rigby notices a pair of dentures coming at them. "TEETH! TEETH!" He shouted. "WooooAAAHH! AAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHH!!! OOOF!" Anna swerves to the left, causing the car to crash in a bush. "Uuuuuuuuhhhh..." everyone said. "What happened? Where'd she go?" Anna asked. Mordecai points. "There she is, on the bridge!"
Joanne is seen on the bridge's ledge, about to throw the flat screen down to the river below. The four run towards her, Rigby with Joanne's TV as well. "Joanne! Stop!" (Y/n) shouted. "I'll teach you to mess with other people's stuff!" She shouted. Rigby puts the TV down on the bridge's ledge and speaks in a negotiating manner. "Come on Joanne!" He goes into the old guy's car and pulls out an air horn. He uses it while speaking. "Let's take it easy with the flat screen." He said.
"GRRRRR!!" She growled. "We were wrong to touch your TV, okay? Haven't you ever made a mistake before?" (Y/n) asked. "Only mistake I made, was leaving my TV alone with that no respect moochwad Eileen." Joanne said. "You're the moochwad!" (Y/n) snapped. "I'd watch my mouth if I were you, rodent!" Joanne shouted. "GRRRRRR!.." Rigby growls, then sighs and cools himself down, then speaks calmly into the air horn again. "Heeeyy, loook. I know you wouldn't want anything to happen to your TV, just like we wouldn't want anything to happen to Eileen's TV.
He stops speaking into the air horn and speaks just with his voice. Joanne still looks angry. "I get it Joanne. This thing has been your best friend since you were a baby. It entertained you when you were bored, it made you laugh when you were sad, and maybe, just maybe, it helps you forget for a minute that you are a hideous monster." Joanne glares and growls at Rigby as (Y/n) snickers. "What do ya say Joanne? Let's just swap TVs and move on, ok?" (Y/n) asked. Rigby peaks into the air horn again. "No one needs to get hurt here." He said.
Joanne looks at the flat screen. "Grrrrrr...." She sighs. "Ok." She said. "Ok." Rigby puts down the air horn and (Y/n) gets onto the ledge. She is about to take the T.V., but Joanne chucks it down to the ground below. "AAAHH!!" (Y/n) shouted. "NOOOOOOOOO!!!!!" Rigby, Mordecai and Anna shouted. "Eileen's T.V. that she won at a dance competitiiioooooonnnn!!!!" Rigby gives (Y/n) the rope whip, and she whips towards it. The rope latches onto it, saving it. Things are silent, and she sighs of relief. "That was close!" She said. "Whoa, sis!" Anna said. "Nice whip action!" Mordecai said. "Ugh, whatever, just give me my TV back!" At that moment, the wind blows it off, and it plummets to the river and breaks.
"AaaaaahhhhoooooooooAAAAAAAAUUUUGGGGHHHH!!!!!" She falls on her knees and puts her fists in the air. Anna looks at Mordecai. "She really liked that old TV, huh?" She asked. Then a ghost comes out of the TV. "Oh no! The ghost of my family's inheritance lawyer!" The ghost makes a ghost phone appear. "NOOO!!" Joanne shouted. The ghost lawyer dials a number. " ....She failed, sir." He said. Joanne covers her face and starts to break down. A black limo then arrives, and her grandpa comes out. "JOANNE! What have you done?!" He asked. "Grandpa Hanatronic, I can explain!" She said. "Wait, is your last name Hanatronic?" Mordecai asked. "Uh yeah, hello? Joanne Hanatronic, heir to the Hanatronic Television Dynasty!" She said.
"Did you know that was her name?" Anna asked (Y/n), and she shrugs. "I just thought it was a weird coincidence!" She said, and Rigby face palms. "ENOUGH! Why is our priceless family television sitting at the bottom of this river?!" Her grandpa asked. "It's stiiill........gooood." A bird is eating on the cord. Her grandpa nods disapprovingly. "You have disgraced the family name.
Now, you must give up your modern lifestyle and by that I mean the shared rental unit you inhabit with that commoner." He said. "NOOOOOO!!!!" Joanne shouted. Her grandpa points to the open limo door. "Get in the limo!" He shouted. She walks to the limo and gets inside. "UGH! Are all my horses still there?" She asked. "They are." He gets in as well, and Joanne grunts. Grandpa Hanatronic shuts the door and the limo drives away. "Wait, what just happened here?!" (Y/n) asked. The ghost lawyer makes ghost noises as he floats to them.
"I'm glaaaaaad you aaaaassssked. When Joanne asked to live on her own amongst the, shall we say, "lower classes," we allowed it, as long as she continued to protect the family's most prized heirloom, the original television her family's company produced. In retrospect, we probably should've kept it in a safe. As a result, she will no longer inherit the company." He said. "What's gonna happen to her?" Anna asked. "She will be punished with a life of opulence and leisure at the Hanatronic family manor." He makes ghost noises. "She'll be fine." He snaps and disappears, and the TV is shown to be shattered into pieces by a gust of wind. It then becomes part of the wind. The four look down at it as this happens.
"Now I get why she didn't want you touching her stuff." Anna said. Back at Eileen's house, they put the TV back on the wall just as Eileen walks in. "What's going on?" She asked. "SURPRISE!" The group said. "Check it out, Eileen! Your TV's all set up!" (Y/n) said. "Don't worry about the installs, it's ready for your eyeballs!" Rigby rapped. "NU-UUUUHH!" She then uses her normal voice, but surprised. "You guys didn't have to go to so much trouble! Thank you!!" She said. "It was all (Y/n)'s idea." Rigby said. "Really?" Elieen smiles at her. "And as an added bonus, Joanne's not your roommate anymore!" (Y/n) said. Eileen does a fist pump. "Yesssss! I mean, uh, that's cool too." She said, and (Y/n) giggles.
(Y/n) hands the remote to Eileen. "Care to do the honors?" Eileen turns the TV on. The news is airing. "And now let's hear from some holiday shoppers down at the Mall." Phil said. "Lines are long." An old lady said. "It's too crowded and it smells weird." A brown haired lady said while holding a dog. "Hey Mom! Look, I'm on TV!" An orange haired guy said. "AAAHH! The local news! This is the best surprise ever!" Eileen said. "Well, we wanted to order a pizza and have it ready for you when you got here, but we didn't plan ahead." Mordecai said, and (Y/n) smirks. "Or did we?" She asked, and the doorbell rang. "Pizza guy!" Someone shouted. "Sweet!" Rigby said. "Woah, impressive, sis." Anna said. She nods approvingly.
"Seriously! This was all really cool. I'm proud of you, (Y/n)." Mordecai said. "Thanks, Mordecai!" She said. "Now who's gonna pay for the pizza?" Rigby asked. "Pffftt. I guess things are back to normal." Mordecai said. "Hahahahahaha!" The group laughs. "If this is normal, then I'm really happy with normal." (Y/n) said. Rigby and (Y/n) smile at each other. The pizza guy knocks this time. "....Uuuuuhh, hellooo?" He asked. "Oh, uh, we'll get that, heh." (Y/n) goes to the front door with Mordecai. " Should I grab some plates?" Anna asked. "I've got some soda in the fridge." Elieen said. Anna and Eileen go into the kitchen. No one is in the living room while the TV is still on. "Can you tell me how to get outta here?" An old man asked. "Haha, looks like the usual holiday craziness, Phil! From The Two Pines Mall, this is Sam Smith reporting live." Sam said. "Stay warm out there, Sam!" Phil said. "Thanks, Phil. It's good to be back in town!" Sam said.
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