The ghostwriter in Ben's dungeon pranced with joy when he finished The Reddit Book. He went up the stairs and shouted through the locked basement door,

"Ben, I finished the book!"

Ben opened the basement door, and the ghostwriter bolted out. The ghostwriter was overjoyed to finally be on his way home. He got home in about 2 hours. Meanwhile, Ben looked over the manuscript. It didn't seem too bad, so he sent it to his publisher. They accepted immediately, because this publishing company accepted anything.

Unfortunately for Ben, it was a major flop, just like his previous attempts, Beavis and Butt-Head Teach Shapes and Colors, and Amy Schumer's Bedtime Stories for Kids. It was so much of a flop, its earnings were in the negatives. Hip Books for Youngsters, the publisher of Ben's atrocity, had no choice but to file for bankruptcy.

Ben wasn't going down without a fight, though. He determined that it was Mr. Flonklesnorf that made him fail. Mr. Flonklesnorf (according to Ben) is an imaginary entity that makes Ben fail. He can only be contacted via cocaine or magic mushrooms. Ben shot some cocaine. Shortly after, he called Smack-O to transport him to Mr. Flonklesnorf's evil lair.

Ben got off of his zebra and opened the doors to the lair. Mr. Flonklesnorf was inside laughing.

"You!" Ben yelled. "You're the one that ruined my life. Now I'll ruin yours!"

Ben turned around, pulled down his pants, and squatted down.

"W-what are you doing?" The concerned Mr. Flonklesnorf asked.

"Something I should have done a long time ago," Ben replied as he squeezed out a turd onto the floor.

Meanwhile, in reality, the curious children of the 7th Street Elementary School wondered why an old man was pooping in the street. Their teachers hustled them inside.

"No! My only weakness!" yelled Mr. Flonklesnorf.

Pooping on Mr. Flonklesnorf's lair floor was the only way to kill him. He didn't have any janitors, so the germs from the poop would infect Mr. Flonklesnorf's bladder and somehow give him brain damage. Don't ask how that works, the science in Ben's drug trips is screwed up.

Ben got on Smack-O and rode into the sunset. In reality, though, he was riding in a police car because he was arrested for indecent exposure, kidnapping, and being in possession of illegal drugs.

THE END