"My silence is another word for my pain."

Bree's pov

"Bree, You came!" Annie squeals and comes to me. She hugs me tight. I put on a fake smile. Fuck! This is going to be a lot harder than I thought.

"I wouldn't miss it," I say. I was internally slapping myself for coming here.

"I'm so sorry..." she starts, but I cut her off.

"Let's not talk about it," I say. Fucking hell.

"Talk about what?" someone asks from behind. I turn to look at who it is. No way. Aiden fucking Waters again.

"What are you doing here?" I ask him annoyed.

"You need to be the one answering that 'cause it's my brother that's getting married," he says smirking. Fantastic, just fucking fantastic.

"Honey, it's so good to see you finally after so long," Jared's mother, Eliza comes up and hugs me. At least I needn't tell Aiden how I'm related to them.

Ignoring his presence, I look around the living room. There are pictures everywhere. A few with me too. I so want to bash myself up right now. Jared, Jared, and Jared everywhere.

Sitting on the couch along with the other bridesmaids is so irritating, and their girly talks are totally getting me on the edge. I feel my headache and place my head in my hands. I'm getting impatient with every passing second.

"How's your hand?"I hear a familiar voice, and I already know who it is. Aiden. Instead of answering, I put my hand in front of his face. He touches it, and I pull my hand back. I examine his look for a few seconds, he wore a grey t-shirt and blue jeans, and his messy brown hair made him look good.

Wait, What?!

I look away before standing up and get to the stairs that lead to Jared's bedroom. Ascending the stairs, I feel shivers run down my spine as I place my hand on the doorknob to open the door. Taking a deep breath, I open the door and step in. I turn on the lights before closing the door behind me. It looks the same as it was when he left, the wall is filled with pictures. Tears start to blur my vision as I look at our pictures. I take the one in which Jared's kissing me and trace the photo with my fingers. This picture was when my life was something called perfect.

~

I stayed in there for what felt like an hour and cried until I couldn't take it anymore. Washing my face, I look at my appearance in the mirror and clear all the mascara marks on my cheeks. I apply some eye makeup to cover up my puffy red eyes so that I don't look too obvious. Grabbing my backpack, I give the room one last look before turning off the lights and opening the door to leave.

I just hope that Aiden doesn't get in my way again.

"What were you doing in there?" Someone inquires or rather Aiden inquires and I just descend the stairs after giving him a look which I shouldn't have. So much for just wanting to avoid the guy.

"Were you crying?" he frowns a little, but I continue descending the stairs and head towards Annie.

"I need to leave Annie. I'm not feeling well," I speak without looking at her.

"That's fine. Come here at ten in the morning tomorrow. Take care. Bye," Annie finishes, and I sigh. Did I want to do this? Hell no!

"Will do. Bye," I reply with the best smile I could muster up and head to the front door. I rush out and sense someone following me. I walk faster and unlock my car. I throw my backpack into the back seat before getting around to the driver's seat.

"Bree wait!" Aiden shouts behind me, but I ignore him and get into the car. I start driving fast, and the only thing on my mind were thoughts of Jared.

~

I hop out of my car and lock it before heading towards the front door that's open. I rush towards the stairs, ignoring Maria in the process and run up to my room. I shut the door, and I let out the tears that I've been holding.

Wanting to hurt myself so badly right now, I walk up to my closet and take out a bottle of vodka. I lift the bottle to my lips, and I feel my throat burning at its raw taste, but it doesn't matter.

A hiss escapes my lips as I feel my hand hit something sharp but I didn't know what it is since I'm already tipsy. Ignoring the pain, I just get onto the bed and curl up into a ball. I scream into my pillow in an attempt to numb it all but it doesn't help, and cry like I never did before.

~

The sunlight hurts my eyes making me groan. Both my hands feel sore. Oh, no-no. My head is hurting!

Hangover.

The thought of having a hangover made my groan in frustration. Fucking hell. I look at both my hands that are sore and bandaged. Maria did it of course. I look over to my nightstand where a bottle of teynol and water are kept. I have it and get off the bed before running towards the bathroom at the sensation of puking. I empty it all out and wash my mouth.

I brush my teeth and change into a loose t-shirt and sweatpants before heading downstairs, grabbing my phone to the time. 8:00 am. Oh God, I need to go over to Annie's by 10:00 am. That gives me two hours.

"Some coffee?" Maria offers as she sees me heading towards the kitchen.

"Good morning Maria and yes I need some coffee, please," I say as I sit on the barstool with my head in my hands. My phone starts ringing. Jackson.

"Hey Jackson," I greet him, trying to sound reasonable.

"How's your hangover Kitty?" he questions and I look over to Maria. She told him of course.

"Awful," one word was enough to describe it all.

"Okay, now change the damn topic," I say before he talks about my hand and going over to Annie's.

"So what are your plans for the day?" he asks me yawning.

"Going over to Annie's just to make my life even worse," I retort, and that is the truth. It's bad enough that I have to face memories that hurt stepping into that house and now I have an overly excited bride to handle. I really didn't need that kind of energy in my life right now.

"Oh come on, Kitty. It'll get better," he says.

"Keep telling me that. So how's Amanda?" I inquire.

"She is doing well," he answers.

"Hmm... I'll talk to you later Jackson. My head is hurting badly," I tell him feeling my head pounding ever more than before. Hangovers are fucked up.

"Alright, Kitty. Just take care. Okay?" he asks me with concern lacing in his voice. 

"Yeah will do," I reassure him.

"Okay then, Love you. Bye," Jackson says.

"Love you too brother. Bye," with that, I drop the call. Maria hands me my coffee, and I sip on it. Ah, it feels so much better already. I rest my head on the aisle and close my eyes.

After eating some eggs, sausages and toast, I get back to my room. I get into the shower and shampoo my hair with some strawberry scented shampoo. After relaxing under the hot water for sometime, I wrap a towel and walk out. I head towards my closet while running my hand through my wet hair.

After blow-drying my hair, I twist some hair from the front and pin it behind. I decide on not putting any makeup. Finally, I select a shrug and put it on so that it could cover the bandages before walking out. Grabbing my backpack and phone, I leave the room.

"I'm going, Maria. Bye!" I announce and get out of the house.  Taking my lambi, I leave with Brad in another car behind me.

~

Taking a deep breath, I get off the car and head towards the front door. I knock on the door, and Annie opens it with a huge smile.

"Hey Annie," I greet bringing back my well-practiced smile.

"Hey, Bree! Come in," she says, and I get in. Back to hell. I sit on the couch again ignoring the others. My hands are hurt well enough for me to be distracted. Someone comes and sits next to me. Well not someone, it's Aiden. I roll my eyes at him, and he smirks.

"Looks like you hurt your other hand too," he says staring at my other hand. I pull down the sleeves of my shrug covering the bandage.

"It's none of your fucking business," I hiss through my teeth.

"Woah! What have you been doing? You look like crap," he states. Is this guy ever going to stop?

"Would stop bombarding me with your fucking questions?" I ask him.

"I'm as bored as you are so I'm just trying to make some friendly talk with you," he says grinning.

"I'm not interested in your friendly talk so just leave me alone already," I say trying to control my anger. He just gives me too much of trouble vibes, he's probably nice but just not my kind of a person. No one ever is so.

Or you're just convincing yourself that.

"Aiden! Come here," someone calls him, and I sigh in relief. Finally!

"We are not done talking baby doll," Aiden says smiling. What now is he trying to be nice with that deadly smile of his?! 

"Fuck off," I say showing him my finger, and he just laughs a little before leaving. I groan a little in anger gaining a few looks from the blondes. Why is this guy behind me? Fucking asshole. He's probably just going back to his friends and laughing upon these short conversations he's trying to make with me. That actually wouldn't surprise me cause this idiot is Ricky's friend.

"Come on guys we need to go for deciding your dresses. Get into the cars," Annie announces, and I walk up to her while the others start heading out.

"Umm...could I just come in my car?" I question. I didn't want to sit with these girls.

"Yeah it's totally up to you," she says with a soft smile, and I return it with my fake smile.

"Thank you," I say and walk out of the house. It's getting hot, so I remove my shrug and throw it into the back seat. I hear a knock on the passenger window and put down the window. I roll my eyes at who it is.

"Could you please drive me. My car's not starting and all the others left. I promise I won't bug you," Aiden asks with a gentle smile. Look who's in need.

"Hop in," I say. He gets onto the passenger's seat, and my phone starts ringing.

"I know him, Brad," I answer and drop the call. I press the button to open the roof. I love my convertible. I look back to where Brad's car was and give him a thumbs up.

"You've got a bodyguard?" Aiden asks confused.

"Yeah," I answer monotonously and start driving while I could still feel his gaze on me, making me feel hot. By hot I mean heat in my cheeks.

"Nice car," he says as I drive. I roll my eyes and just look straight onto the road trying to stay as calm as I could. A year ago was probably as talkative as Aiden is right now, but that only lasted when Jared was around. 

"Why don't you ever smile?" he asks breaking the silence making my jaw tighten, and I drive faster. Damn, how I wish I could just kick him out of my car right now.

"You said you wouldn't bug me," I remind him.

"Oh come on just one question," he whines, and instead of answering, I just drive.

"Why don't you make friends?" my grip on the steering tightens as my thoughts go haywire, why does he have to be so inquisitive about my life.

"Just fucking shut up Aiden!" I yell at him and put my sunglasses back on as I feel tears forming in my eyes.

He doesn't say anything after that but doesn't look away either. I stop at the place and press the button to close the roof again. I get out of the car grabbing my shrug and shut the door hard. I put on the shrug and walk into the boutique. It was hard to put myself up there, and this damn guy was making it harder.

I put on the peach color dress that Annie asked me to try on and look at myself in the mirror. I look like a freaking zombie. Sighing, I take a deep breath bracing myself for the beaming joy that Annie has been carrying around me.

"Oh my God! Bree, you look so beautiful. Jared would..." she trails off. I would be damned. This is enough, I'm so fucking done right now. I get back in and change into my clothes. I come out and hand over the dress to Annie.

"Annie, I'm sorry, but I can't do this. You may hate me for this, and I was trying hard to keep his thoughts away. I can't do it anymore. Just find someone else please," I blow over, and before she could say anything, I leave.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

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-this_is_her.......😘