Author:

  @-listless  

Cover:

This is a wonderful cover, there is nothing flashy but it looks well-made. The colors give me the chills.

Blurb:

The blurb made me very interested to continue with this tale. I enjoyed reading this blurb and I would have happily taken it off the shelf of a bookshop or library to take a look inside.

Prologue:

An easy-to-read prologue which tends to be a bit too fast-paced, though. The story is fairly clear, the voice is good, but it did not stand out to me as anything more than just good. It is a nice little start to this story, but would not hold my attention were I someone not a fan of this genre.

I have not felt a connection with Kai, so I feel no empathy in the confrontation with the bandit. There is little build up to when Kai is rescued by Erez.

Though there is a massacre going on, I can barely see it. It is a blur. There is so much more you can show us about this slaughter to make it more visual and to grab the attention of your reader. Right now it feels like a rough draft is being read. Show us what is going on! Make us feel the fear, smell the blood, all that good gory stuff!

I believe if the prologue were a bit longer and more detailed then I would get hooked, but right now I am not.

There needs to be more work done on this because it sounds like it could be a great tale.

Good luck, darkling!