Kemar POV

To say my mother was upset was an understatement. Her fury bubbled from her tongue with no filter but it was her slamming the door in Seana's face as she rushed puffing angrily up the steps to the veranda behind us that took it to the top.

"What the hell was her issue? Come to think of it what was the issue with all dem woman yah believing yuh is fair game to them all?"

As my mother carried on her berating of what happened with Latrice a few minutes ago my mind was set on going to Cullayne.

"Yuh si dem galanging deh nuh tek it up a Miss Lamais yaad cause yuh know seh yasso a nuh d place fi it!"

I knew by now we had an audience though unseen because her voice was practically echoing off the stylish interior of the living room in which we were standing.

"Deh gyal a who by the way Kem an wat a way she bright?!"

I gently placed my hand on my mother's shoulders and said softly, "Mom chill nuh man yuh nuh fraid yuh pressure rise?"

"Nuh tell mi bou pressah," she snapped but she did refrain from shouting. "Yuh is a decent man weh need a good, grounded woman an dat jezebel a nuh it."

Was she speaking of Latrice or Seana?

I smile at her and pull her to me. "I know dat."

She hugged me and said into my shoulder. "But if you know why Laynie back home an yuh still playing the protective bredda."

Now this was a spin I was not expecting.

I found myself going rigid as my mother's words filled my ears and its meaning took root. There were no implications in those words but a clear concrete stating of what I wanted more than anything in this world and it seemed so did my mother.

I felt her pull away from me and take my hand before she led me to the couch behind us and indicated that I sit.

"I watch yuh love Laynie from the day Lamais and Maas Cushane brought her home. That little girl was the cause of envy between yuh and yuh sistas but as time went by they too began to see that Layne and you were destined."

I watched as a soft smile displayed itself on her lips as her mind clouded with memories. Pretty soon her boisterous laughter filled the room and she hit my leg in amusement a sure sign that one of those memories took presidence.

"Yuh memba when Tishawna a Sherita buss big fight ova Penn a d Community Funday fi defend Laynie? All tek Miss Kenzie goat rope off at Tammy an beat Punchie an Pinky fi a faas an tease Layne bou she a demon pickney an ar madda a obeah woman?"

I nodded in automatic response as my mind was still on my mother's revelation about her desire for me and Laynie.

"Lawks mi bwoy dat was something mi swear dem did a guh a jail," she said frowning. "One piece a singing happen until Lamais give dem an dem Mumma a prapah reading an dem Church Convention an soon dem get them reasoning an put dem attitude in check."

I nodded again not sure if I should give way to the desire that surged through me knowing that my mother approved of me being with Cullayne.

"Kem everybody know you love Laynie its there in the way yuh look at her, the way you gave her away knowing deep down it tear yuh up to see her with anedda man," she told me softly. "But see mi an Lamais prayah ansa she back home it's time fi things fall in its perspective place."

What was my mother implicating? Did Lamais approve of me being with Cullayne? After all, I am far older than her daughter and by no means ideal as Taylon to be the man who stood by her.

"Mama, please let's not get ahead of ourselves here," I said pulling myself from the temptation to dive into what she was saying. Laynie it is engaged and we all know she rather be in Canada---"

"Heh," was she scoffed as she strugglingly rose from the sofa. "God will must be done!"

"Mama?" she brushed my hand away as I rose and tried to help her. 

"See dat bwoy Bounty weh yuh have a yuh yaad run him out before bad things happen a nuh every stray dog can tame, yuh ere mi?!"

I guess that was the end of Cullayne and I, she clearly said her part and was done with it, unlike her dislike of me having Bounty as a tenant.

"Yuh sorry fi meagre dawg e tun ruon bite yuh!" she said hobbling to the door that led to the kitchen. "People nuh change unless dem want to an him a clear sign a dat."

I watched as she braced herself on her stick and hobbled away now softly singing the refrain of  the hymn (Jesus Keeps Me) Near The Cross.

I sigh heavily and run my hand over my bearded face and tried to decipher what was really happening here.

Ok for starters it seems that everyone knew that I was deeply in love with Cullayne and had no issues with it, and it would have been great if they had hinted that they knew rather than having me think I am the Great Pretender!

However, it was a relief to know they did not look at me in disgust for loving someone who to almost everyone who knew us was like a younger sister to me.

Nonetheless in all that was said it all stemmed down to Cullayne. She was the one who held the outcome in her hands.

Would she be disgusted in knowing my true feelings for her? Would a declaration open up feelings of love that were not platonic regarding us? Is Taylon worth giving up for me?

Did I truly fit into the grand plan of Cullayne's legacy?

All these questions had answers but I was afraid to seek them as I would die if I were to lose Cullayne completely. I believe it best I remain as a friend.

On shaky legs, I made for the flight of stairs that would take me to her room as I battled with wanting more than ever to step out on a limb and make my feelings for her known... feelings that it seemed my mother felt might be returned.

Lord guide me, please...