Seki

Gosh, where are my damn keys?

I dump my bag out onto the floor in front of my apartment door and search through the mess of my belongings.

What the hell?

I swear it's that damn Marcus's fault; always stressing me out by adding more to my workload...

Unable to find my keys in the mess I've made in front of my apartment door, I quickly scoop up all my items and return them to my handbag. I try to remain as calm as possible as I begin to pat myself down.

Great, just great, Seki...

After what seems like forever, I finally find my keys in my back pocket and make my way inside through the front door, feeling completely defeated by the day.

The setting of my apartment does not at all help with my mood.

We seriously need to do a deep clean and soon because the moment I set my bag down and enter the kitchen, I feel as if I'm being assaulted by dirty dishes and lingering leftovers.

*Grrr*

Shut up, stomach...

On top of it, I'm starving...

I decide to rummage through the fridge in an attempt to find something to snack on while I figure out what my plans will be for dinner, but as expected, nothing worthwhile grabs my attention, so I slam the fridge shut and slink down helplessly to the floor in front of it.

Ugh

Why is this my life right now?

I can't help but let out a scream out of frustration, and like clockwork, the tears come strolling down.

"Is that my gorgeous sister I hear?"

Crap, I forgot she was home...

*sniffle* "Uh, yeah, I'm in the kitchen, Trin."

I quickly try to wipe away my tears, stand up, and make my way awkwardly toward the sink, where I casually lean back and wait for my sister to enter the room.

"Oh God, girl, what is wrong with you?" She looks me up and down and pauses midway to the kitchen.

"Nothing, just had a long day," I reply, trying to keep myself together.

"A long day? You literally just left two hours ago. Are you on a break or something?"

"No, I told them I wasn't feeling good, and I had to get out of there..."

"...Marcus was driving me nuts today. He was basically treating me like I'm the only employee in the building who knows what's going on."

She makes her way into the kitchen and grabs a seat at the table, pushing some of the clutter to the side and signaling me to take a seat beside her.

I take a seat at the table and carefully try to keep eye contact to a minimum. She's my sister, and she can always tell when something's wrong.

*Grrr*

"Um, Seki, have you eaten yet today? Your stomach is basically screaming just as loud as you were a second ago."

"No, I just really haven't had the chance. My mind has been everywhere. I planned on having a snack or something while I figured out dinner, but the fridge was empty. It looks like both of us have forgotten to go grocery shopping again."

She clicks her tongue and whips out her phone. "Well, honey, that's the magic of living in this era. Food is just an app away."

"Tell you what, how about I order us something to eat, and we have a little sister time? I think we could both definitely use it."

"Definitely."

I notice her scrolling through her phone, looking for places to order from, and I am just grateful I have her on days like these.

"Birria Tacos sound good?"

"Tacos sound amazing."

"Perfect, some nachos on the side, and boom, we're all set!"

She sets her phone down on the table, widens her eyes, and flings her hair to the side.

I'm used to my sister's dramatic gestures, so I'm pretty sure a serious conversation is coming.

"Thank you. I really appreciate it, Trinity."

"Duh, what are big sisters for?"

I can't help but laugh.

"Now, what's bugging you, sis? What was that little scream session about? I know it's more than work... Is it a guy? If it is, please don't say it has anything to do with Tristan..."

I'm a horrible liar, and if I'm being honest, ever since the day at Logan's mother's shop, so many scenarios about Tristan and who he really is have been taking over my mind...

I wonder if that's what's really bothering me, the fact that we'll never be the same again, or even worse, the possibility that he never even liked me, that he was just going along with what he thought would be accepted because it was easier...

"Well..." I clear my throat.

"Spit it out. You never told me what happened at the movies the other night. Does that have something to do with it?"

"Kind of..."

"Oh God, what did he do? Do I need to call him and cuss his ass out? That's it, give me your phone, Seki..."

"No, wait, listen..."

"I'm listening..."

"I think you were right..."

"Uh, Duh, I told you to leave him alone..."

"No, not about that..."

Her eyes widen even more dramatically than before and she turns her body toward me, mouth agape and completely still.

I close my eyes because I just can't look at her. I can't process her response right now, even though I really need her to help me navigate this.

I try my hardest to say it, and it eventually comes out... "I think... Tristan might be... um into guys..."

I work up the courage to open my eyes and gauge her response. She is silent, her mouth no longer open, her eyes back to normal, and I can tell she's searching through her mind, trying to compile the right words to say.

Please don't say I told you so, anything, but I told you so...

"I'm sorry, sis, and don't worry, I won't say I told you so, but I do have questions, like how do you know?"

I swallow hard and try to make sense of the pieces I've been trying to put together over the last day so I can offer up the best explanation to my sister.

"Well, that night at the movies, he was a bit withdrawn. We talked the day before, and he was complaining about his mother as usual..."

"Uh-huh,"

"But when I got there, it was like I could tell something was on his mind, like his head was in the clouds. I've dated him on and off through the years, so I know his personality to a tee by now..."

I notice her raise her brow.

"So, you're assuming he's gay just because his personality was a bit off?"

"No, there's more..."

"At the end of the night, he waited for my Uber with me and invited me to check out some crystal shop this guy he randomly met invited him to..."

"And then all the things you said started running through my mind about how you saw him look at guys before, and how he's neatly groomed et cetera et cetera..."

"Oh wow, so did you go?"

"Yes, I did, and once again, the energy was off."

"It was like on the way there, he was so excited. I mean, I could blame it on the crystals and whatnot because he's always been into that spiritual crap, but it's like I knew he was more excited to see that guy, Logan."

"Damn, sis, I'm sorry. Did anything else happen?"

"Not really. We haven't talked since, but that's normal. I usually have to text him first, but they did exchange numbers, which he tried to say was because he's looking for a job, but I'm sure there's more to it."

I notice my sister getting silent, and my sibling instinct tells me that, once again, she's carefully crafting her words before replying.

"Seki, no matter what, I want you to know that you are beautiful and will find the right guy for you. Screw Tristan, especially for stringing you along like that. I mean, hello, we would still accept you if you would tell us the truth. He's basically like family now."

"Um, can we not call him family? That makes it even weirder."

We both break out into laughter.

"You know what I mean, Seki, ha-ha."

"Well, what do you think I should do?"

"Maybe leave him alone for a while. Let him figure things out. It'll give you some time to clear your head as well. Maybe you can get yourself a little date on Crush, maybe..." she nudges me.

"... that might help."

Maybe

"Yeah, you're right. I need to..."

*ping*

I see my sister reach for her phone, and her face lights up instantly.

"Hold that thought. It's taco time, and a bitch is ravenous."

*ping*

I reach into my pocket for my phone while my sister heads downstairs to grab our food, and I notice a text notification from Tristan. He never texts first. All that magic, mystical crap must be working, and he can sense I just had a conversation about him.

Can you imagine?

I open up the text thread.

Tristan: Hey Seki, I know you're at work, but I'm freaking out. I need your help.

I swear to God, if this is about Logan, I am going to chuck my phone at the wall right now.

Me: Hey Trist, actually, I left early today. What's up?

Tristan: Omg, I know it's the last minute, but do you think you'd be able to come over for a few? I was going to just ask your opinion via text, but in person would be way better.

I literally just decided the best thing to do was give him space, but he says he needs me, and he is still my friend. Maybe he just wants to tell me the truth, and if it were me, I'd want the support.

Me: Sure, do you think you can give me an hour or two? Trin just ordered lunch and I don't want to be rude.

Tristan: Of course! I really appreciate it btw, and my mom would love to see you!

Tristan: See you soon, XOXO.

XOXO?

What the hell has gotten into that boy?

Maybe I shouldn't be asking that question...

Haha...

As I'm laughing at my own funny thoughts, my sister enters the room with the food, and my stomach could not be happier.

"What the hell are you laughing at? Is it my heavy breathing?"

"Because I'm telling you, next apartment, we need the first floor for real. Those stairs are rough."

"Tell me about it."

We start eating our tacos, making jokes about our jobs, and planning to go grocery shopping later in the day.

Before you know it, I'm completely full, and I really don't want to get out of the house, but a part of me is curious to know what Tristan needs help with.

"So, Trinity, sis, my amazing sister..."

"Oh God, what is it now, Seki? I know you got some B.S. to say when you start your sentences like that..."

"No, no B.S. at all..."

I rush my words out as quickly as I can... "Tristan texted and said he needs me, so I'm going out for a few. I'm pretty sure he's going to come out to me, so I'll bring back tea..."

"Oh boy, I swear, Mr. Tristan will be the death of you, sis, but you do you, and please, yes, at least bring back some deets."

"Will do."

I get up from the table, make my way to my room to freshen up a bit, and order an Uber.

When the Uber arrives, I make my way downstairs as all these thoughts are swirling around in my mind.

Thoughts about what he might really have to say...

Is he really about to come out to me?

Maybe he does like me, and Logan was just a quick phase, a bit of curiosity...

It could literally be anything at this point...

I greet my driver and make my way into his hatchback, and all my nerves are on edge.

I guess you're going to find out now, Seki.

Maybe, finally, you'll get the truth.