Mangareader90 here (technically, the m Is lowercased in my name). So, this is for samanthauchiha who wanted a Sachi contest between Lucy and I. If Lucy wins I have to write a fluffy oneshot about...I dunno. Something. If I win...I just get to say I win. I like winning. Anyway, I do not own Naruto, that right belongs to Masashi Kishimoto. Oh, this is a modern fanfic, so AU.

"With a thousand lies and a good disguise, hit 'em right between the eyes, hit 'em right between the eyes," I sang along to "You're Gonna Go Far Kid", by the Offspring. It is the best f***ing song ever. I swear to G*d if anyone makes fun of this song, that will be the day of their death. I will stab a b*tch.

"Ugh, that song is so overrated," I heard a voice behind me say. Okay, stabbing b*tches time. I turned around, my fist raised in the air, only to see one of my best friends: Manga.

"You b*tch," I said, flipping her off. She just laughed, handing me a letter that had my name on it. I took it from her, unfolding it so that I could read its contents.

Dear Samantha,

This note is to inform you that you have detention tonight from 3:00-5:00 p.m. sharp. The reason for your detention is that you were caught threatening a student by the name of Uzumaki Karin. While you would normally receive a suspension for this action, after much debate and reasoning, it has been decided that you will serve three separate detentions being looked after by a recent graduate of this school. The days are as following: today, Wednesday, and Friday. Failure to appear in detention will get you an automatic suspension of three days. You have been warned.

-Principal Tsunade

"You would not believe the strings I had to pull to save your butt. Plus, it wasn't just me. Lucy had to get involved too, promising to paint the school's mural or whatever," Manga ranted. I rolled my eyes.

"You know, all I did was threaten to burn her house down and beat her until she was unrecognizable. I shouldn't even have to be threatened with suspension over something so stupid. Also, what is this sh*t about some graduate of our school watching me?" I turned to Manga for answers, but she simply shrugged.

"I don't know or care. All I know is that you have to be there in forty-five minutes. Have fun, you psychopathic pyromaniac," Manga waved goodbye before leaving me behind. B*tch.

I looked at the letter once more, thinking about who could be watching me. Anyone would be okay as long as it wasn't someone from the Akatsuki. Especially as long as it wasn't Pein-nii or Itachi.

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"I f***ing hate my G*d d*mn life," I stated, leaning back in my chair and placing my feet onto the desk in front of me.

"Remove your feet from the desk, Samantha. I'm not afraid to write you up for this," Itachi ordered. I simply stared at him, pulling out my lighter that I kept in my pocket.

"Hey, anything you write me up for, I'll burn to pieces," I commented. We had a glaring match until he finally sighed, slowly walking towards me.

"Why do you have that in school? You know that it's against the rules," Itachi stopped in front of me, leaning towards my face. I blushed a bit, but I continued to stare at him nonetheless.

"I have it because I like it. Ain't no f***ing teacher gonna tell me that I can't have something I want on me. Besides, fire is interesting to watch. If I ever feel bored, I can just run outside for a few seconds, flip the lighter on, and watch the fire burn," I replied. Itachi seemed unimpressed, reaching his hand out to land on the lighter.

"Samantha, that isn't safe. What if you hurt yourself in the process? What if you got third degree burns? What if you set the school on fire and the police were able to link the arson back to you? What then?" Itachi asked, his voice soft.

"I think it's adorable how you're looking out for me, but you need to back off a little, babe. Let me be me, okay? " I flicked his hand away from the lighter, choosing to stand up in that moment. There was still an hour and a half left of this detention service, and I was already bored.

"What are you doing?" Itachi asked. I shrugged, pacing the room. We weren't even in a classroom, we were in the room where teacher's had to sit and talk to "troubled" students in. I hated this place, it was so dull and boring.

"I'm looking for one fun thing in this sh*thole," I answered. After ten minutes of silently searching, I found nothing. Turning to look at Itachi, I smiled.

"Well, good news, honey: looks like, for once in your life, you are the most fun thing in a room besides the beholder," I announced. He looked p*ssed off, but that was his usual facial expression around me. I wonder why he put up with the sh*t I said and did. I don't really care enough to find out, though.

"Samantha, I'm going to ask you something, and you're going to tell me the truth, okay?" Itachi leaned back against one of the room's walls. I rolled my eyes, staring at the clock in the room.

"I was f***ing twelve years old and hadn't met you yet, GET OVER IT ALREADY. G*d, it's like listening to a broken record, I swear," I muttered near the end. Itachi looked confused, and I realized that we must have been thinking about two different subjects completely. Whoops, my bad.

"Not about that, Samantha. Also, you should know that I will never be over it considering that I love you and it still bothers me today that you had a crush on my-" Itachi ranted, and I placed my hands over my ears.

"LALALA, I CAN'T HEAR YOU!" I shouted, acting like a kid. I deserved it, he knows how much I hated talking about this.

"Anyway, I want to know why you threatened that Uzumaki girl. Lately your threats have been getting worse, more violent even. Samantha, it's getting serious to where word on the street is that the Uzumaki girl wants to press charges. So, why are you doing this?" Itachi asked. I sighed. I didn't want to tell him the truth, it was embarrassing. Best to lie first and see if I can get away with it.

"She's p*ssing me off lately, picking on Manga and Lucy. The two won't fight for themselves, so I gotta defend them. You know, make sure that the b*tch doesn't mess with my family," I lied. I wasn't facing Itachi at all as I spoke, I didn't trust myself to be able to lie to his face. I felt a hand on my shoulder, and the next moment I was turned around, staring straight into Itachi's eyes.

"Sam, tell me the truth. Please, if you love me, you will tell me the truth," Itachi's voice was firm, but his eyes were soft. He was hurt by my lie. I sighed, my face slightly heating up as I stared into his eyes, placing my hand over his.

"She kept saying that she was going to steal you away from me. At first I just ignored her because she's a b*tch, but after two months of it happening, I got aggravated. What triggered the threat was the fact that she said I was in lust with you, not in love. She accused me of not loving you, and I lost it, I guess. Next thing I know, I pulled out my lighter, shoved it near her face and threatened her that I would use it on her house if she ever stepped near you again. I'm sorry," I whispered my apology, tears beginning to block my vision of hi. Itachi wiped the tears away, smiling at me. He then moved in to kiss my forehead, and I felt my face heat up once more.

"Samantha, I love you. I will always love you, and I know that you love me for who I am, just as I love you for who you are. I don't care what someone else thinks about us because they don't know how we truly are. You're my little pyromaniac, and no one is going to take that away from you," Itachi whispered in my ear, hugging me. I stifled my sobs of joy as I hugged him back.

"And you're my precious boy toy," I whispered back, giggling slightly. I heard Itachi sigh.

"Samantha, you're killing the romantic atmosphere," he complained. I pulled back from the hug, looking at Itachi and smiling.

"Sorry, I'll fix it," I promised. I leaned in slowly, my lips brushing against Itachi's. Before anything could be done officially, I noticed that the door to the room was opening slightly. I stopped what I was doing, moving quickly away from Itachi. There were two people standing in the doorway: Pein-nii and Manga. Those c*ckblockers.

"Good news, Sam! I convinced Principal Tsunade that Karin was in the wrong because of the harassment that she had been giving you for two straight months. After confessing that she had said the  hurtful things to you that you were telling me about, Principal Tsunade said that she would also have to serve detentions as well. Karin didn't want to do that, and since our school is really discrete, Principal Tsunade agreed to just call off all the detentions, but she says that if either of you fights each other again she is going to come up with a punishment that you wouldn't want to ever have," Manga bantered on, not reading the atmosphere. I forced a smile.

"That's great. Well, if that was all-" I began to say, before I got rudely interrupted by Pein-nii.

"If this happens again, Sam, I swear I will force you to clean the whole house for two weeks with no help," Pein-nii threatened. I rolled my eyes.

"Okay, I'll remember that, now please leave us alone," I pleaded. Pein-nii looked p*ssed while Manga looked confused.

"Alone to do what? You can leave now, you know," Manga mentioned, opening the door wider to symbolize our freedom.

"In school, Samantha, really?" Pein-nii hissed.

"In school what? Why would anyone want to stay at school longer than they have to?" Manga asked, still not understanding the situation. Pein-nii just sighed, dragging Manga away while he ranted about talking to us at home.

"My G*d, EVERY TIME. Seriously, there has not been ONE SINGLE TIME where we were free to just be alone without interruptions," I hissed.

Itachi walked over to the door, closing it quietly. He turned back to face me with a soft smile and I returned it.

"I believe that I was promised a fixed romantic atmosphere?" Itachi mentioned and I giggled, nodding as I placed my arms around his neck.

"Yeah, I remember that promise," I replied.

This is just our normal routine, after all. After this we would most likely go outside and burn a fire as I watched with glee, making s'mores.  Or maybe go out to see some cheesy movie where the girl always gets her guy. It didn't matter, so long as I was with Itachi.

After all, every pyromaniac needs her own boy toy. And mine is perfect.