~Why do you harass me?~

Don't Say It's Love

Elise

The overseer's room. Every other activity outside of the cube... I will see them. We're still safe... but I am losing strength with every single day.

5 days has passed. The Fallen have picked up our cube, namely Xandor... he would never let a chance like this get away, a chance to get me. Seems like we're going to be stuck here, and if I don't make supplies appear in this little shelter, we... will all die.

"El, you shouldn't be bothering yourself so much. You should focus on managing your energy. You're maintaining the place after all." Michael massaged my shoulders, giving me a little peck on the cheek.

"I know that, Michael... but the fact that he's going to try every single way to wrestle every single one of us out of here, turn us into zombies, turn you into a slave, and turn me into his ultimate weapon, what other choice do I have but to know what they are doing?" The alarms beeped once for a slight warning. I flipped the safety switch to close all places of possible weakness to prevent the Fallen from wrenching open the door with their twisted means. We were currently in the torture chamber... of the castle.

From back when Xandor invited me to his world, there's ultimately only a few places I've been through - the entry/exit portal, the dark town full of hungry Fallen thirsting for blood or souls from people like me, and the eerie line of soldiers before I went up the stairs to Xandor's palace.

"Hey - isn't that Weiss? Varus and Wayne are there too." Since Weiss didn't say his Fallen name to Michael, Michael always addressed him by his innocent name, for he didn't want to believe he was who he is... a controlled Fallen, the same as all the others.

"Yeah..." Listening intently, I made out a few words from their lip movements - "attack", "movement", and the seemingly casual "no".

The "no" came from Xandor. "No" to what? I can't figure out.

He then faced us, as if he was looking into our own eyes, as if we were in front of him. It was only a camera...

"You want to know what I said, Elise? Be a good girl and come out of there, then." He seemed to have an evil scheme, but it was all sincerity - I can't see through him.

"Why should I?" I spoke through the microphone.

"It's probably the only way I'll let you all go. Besides, there's something I want to discuss with you... in private." He didn't seem to bring any sort of item, or person, or thing that would require such private conversation... I can't trust him.

"I'll refuse. Michael must accompany me."

"You don't realise the reason behind this, and because of it, he is not allowed to drop in. Know where you stand, and the place you're in. This is Fallen territory." His hand supported his point, and I turned to Michael, taking off my headphones.

Pulling him to one side away from the mic, "Do you trust me?" but Michael seemed to care more about my safety to trust me, "I really can't allow you to go out there alone. What could they do to you?"

"If it means saving you and the others, I'm willing to sacrifice myself. Michael, support me. Please." We looked in each other's eyes, trying to find the answer.

"I love you." I placed my hand on his cheek.

"I love you more."

"I love you more than most."

"I love you more than everyone... forever." We acknowledged that with a short kiss, before I broke away and left, bringing up attention from a few of my friends, but that didn't matter.

"Hey! Where are you going?" Helena caught my shoulder.

"I'm going to get y'all out of here... even if it means losing my life." I pushed her hand off, but she stopped me with her reply, "I'll go with you."

"Are you sure? I can't protect you - but it would really help if you actually like, try negotiating with me." Helena adjusted her glasses, her eyes filled with determination.

"Well..." I still had second thoughts. She was easily taken advantage of in the SUV when we escaped from the apocalypse happening, by meer minor Fallen.

"I insist. I must repay you... in some way. For saving all of us. Everyone here called on me... and I believe I can assist you."

"Helena..."

I believe you are dragging time, Elise. Xandor's voice echoed in my head, a voice I had long thought to be dead.

"Let's go." I went out through the doors and found myself with them.

"Well, hello," Xandor waved his gloved hand, "have a seat. I did mention that we are supposed to talk in private and that no one else should come along... am I right?"

"You only said Michael was forbidden to join in."

"But it's a silent agreement anyone else besides him should not be here... and I believe I have the right to take control of her until this meeting is over." Helena snapped back, "I came of my own free will. Talk somewhere else. I just want to make sure she comes back in one piece."

"So upfront? Brave soul. I respect you. Veil, Varus... see to her. Make sure she doesn't leave. Helena... Beautiful name." Xandor moved his hand to his forehead, the mask blocking any sort of expression I can use to see through his mind.

Placing his other hand on my shoulder, he whispered into my ear, "Disable all the security cameras. No word should be heard by anyone besides you and me." Side-by-side with the dark lord, I feared to take any risks. I followed his instruction.

Elise?! What are you doing?! Michael's voice intruded into my mind.

Just a while, alright? Just don't interrupt, or else I might be turned before you know it. I reassured him, and Xandor moved on to another room, pitch black, with no furniture. Just a single yellow lamp hanging from the ceiling, dim but enough. Sitting down, leaning against a wall, Xandor beckoned for me to sit with him.

"Do you think I'm a bad person?" He asked that not facing me - but to the wall opposite.

"After all the kidnapping attempts and the apocalypse you started, what do you expect of me to think of you?"

"And what if all of them had a meaning besides trying to get you over to me? Think, Elise. Think. Have you been staying with the Protectors too long to realise what others are planning? I know you're still in a new world. You're learning how to live in it. You're no longer normal. You were used to that life. But being sucked into this world so quickly all by me, and to make you see me as your enemy? Think, dammit." He clenched his fist and banged it against the wall. Clear signs of anger, and desperation from his speech.

"No, I don't know. I'm not the smartest person around, neither am I the best mind scanner. I admit, I'm possibly the strongest being in this universe of Protectors and Fallen, but I have to learn the ropes to get there. What do you expect me to do about it?" I had no idea how to respond to his question appropriately. It was the first time I actually had a proper conversation with him, in such a solemn and calm manner.

Xandor turned to me, "You still don't get it... but I do understand your point about not being the smartest person around. I could tell you about how I must bring you to my side, but you won't believe me. I could tell you about how I became who I am, and tell you every reason I must destroy the Protectors, but it's a ridiculous thing. Because the Protectors did not understand me, I have every right to think you, who follow them, will not as well."

"If so, why ask me to talk to you? Your psychotic evil side is so cold-blooded and fierce, but you're sitting here being so calm. Where's the other side of you, that would do anything to get me?" Xandor's eyes glowed blood-red for a few moments before returning to normal crimson.

"I'm not by myself. All Fallen, living or dead, will live on in me, and I will carry out their wishes. They all died by Protector's hands. In a way they themselves thought was right... but cruel in the minds of humans like you." His dark aura grew stronger, and I moved away, feeling cold from it.

"Then why try to take me away?"

"To right the world as it is. I must tell you the truth, although I need to make the Protectors see me as their number one enemy."

"Nah, you probably just made the Protectors angry in the past or something, there's no way people like them would target you for right- wait. Michael's transformation into an infected was reversed. You did it." A silent nod was seen from Xandor. I threw up my hands in frustration, wondering why would he do it...

"You, of all persons, reversed Michael's infection?! And you were a bloody psychotic evil antagonist the whole bloody time! You're actually quite a nice person, but your other side just makes me fearful. You're unpredictable." I had a fear of him. Like the sea... calm, yet vicious. Dual personalities...

"Now you fear me. You fear my other side. You fear that when it awakens, I will take control of your mind, end the Protectors in one stroke, dominate the world."

"I..."

"Blame it all... on your Protector. I used to be a nice person, just like him. On that fateful day... I became who I am." A coincidental knock on the door. Xandor stood up quickly and asked, a totally different person from a few moments ago, "What is it?"

"The Protector has left the cube. We are currently holding him down." Veil replied.

"He left?! Lock him up!"

"Yes, my Lord." Veil's footsteps faded away as he left.

"Your Protector really can't bear to let you talk to me for so long without him being a bodyguard, huh? No, in fact, it would be just fine, halfbreed. I will show you the hatred I've grown towards him." He lowered himself to my eye level, and his hand made its way to my cheek. His eyes burned red once again.

"He hasn't done anything to upset you! Leave him alone! You were nice to save him, but now you're hurting him! What is up with you?!" A tear left my eye. I had heard stories from both camps. The war was still on, but I wished for it to simply stop. Besides, Xandor's mood changed upon the mention of Michael leaving. Is there some sort of grudge between them I do not know of? Does Michael know?

"Maybe I would if you help me. You must be my apprentice. You will leave them when I call for you." A condition? Why? Am I really that great a decisive factor? Can't they settle the score by themselves?

"To right the world? You must explain your motives, or else I won't be swayed." I reluctantly let out the words. I know they're the words I must speak, but it seems like I betrayed Michael.

"We have all the time in the world, Elise. Soon enough... the world would be perfect. Now come along with me." He opened the door and stretched his hand out to me.

"I want to ask a favour." He pulled out the mask that felt like a safe zone, yet was hell for me.

"I hate to say it, as much as I respect you, but I want you to show him that you're you. You can't make him always think of you as a little child, one that needs his constant care 24/7, you have your own mind, and that you can make your own decisions."

"He's my boyfriend. He has a right to think that, I can't blame him. Besides, he is better than any normal person back on earth."

"But the fact that I said it very clearly, he is not allowed to disturb us... he broke it. I must stay true to my words. Wear the mask. Until you get back to the cube, you're one of us. Stay out of it if you're uncomfortable." Hesitantly picking up the dreaded mask, I stared at it hard.

"Although it's full of painful memories for you, no matter how short that period was... when I made it... I had hope that you will lead all of us, humans, Fallen, whatever remaining of the Protectors, to our real Eden."

"Such a... a big goal you had in mind. What's left of the Protectors in the Fallen camp...? Didn't you literally bring them over to your side by force?"

"I've made them abstain from internal war with my soldiers. Some have decided to defect to my side after finding out the truth behind the Protectors. Are we done? He must be waiting eagerly for you to return."

"I... will wear this. I don't know why I should, but I'm half Fallen. I can feel the pain rushing through your veins, that you had this bad encounter causing you to hate them... caused by a single Protector. But I won't help you in whatever you do to him. I will stop you if necessary." Holding it in both hands, I wore it once again, knowing that I want to help this ruthless dark lord. No matter how reluctant, how I despised it, if being on the other camp gives a chance to understand, I will take that chance. Xandor seemed to have this desire to brainwash me, I guessed it was because I said I might stop him from doing what he wants.

"You look as beautiful as the last time I saw you in it. It... was only past a week, was it?" My lips parted slightly, I looked at him, the expression determined by my mask.

~ Picture sourced from the opening credits of Gundam AGE ~

"Let's... go back." Another tear escaped my eye. On the outside, my mask seemed to be the one crying, instead of me. The mask hid the weak aspects of me away, but it brought a sense of darkness within me, that I could do literally anything, and no one could stop me, because they wouldn't know who it was under it.

"It's okay to cry... just make sure you're stronger after that. And besides, if being a Protector is depressing, remember, you're a Fallen. Just come see us... and me. I would be happy to see you. After I settle a score with Michael, I will set you free, but the apocalypse shall continue to reign. I will make sure I shape the world into one perfect one... my way." We walked out the door, a slight tension forming as I saw the faint evil grin return.

Walking across corridors, Xandor led me. I had a sudden memory flash - mom and dad. Where were they?

"What did you do with my parents? He... you brainwashed them?"

"So what?"

"I... please bring me to them."

"I will not." He wasn't as nice as before, the psychotic side slowly awakening, as we get even closer to Michael.

Is his psychotic side triggered by Michael's presence?

Well... when I returned to where our cube shelter was held hostage, I would find out the truth behind Xandor's mad side... a seductive one at that.

Just please don't say it's love. It isn't. My relationship with Michael? That's love.

Author's Note

It's been just too long, but again, thinking over it was beneficial. I wanted to go on a path where Xandor would continue his evil deeds and start carving TRV me into a number one Fallen. Welp. Not the best path, but a second path opened after a while, with a nice side to Xandor. No, not that I'm making it into a bloody love triangle, but because I need to make myself into a decisive factor. The one deciding the fate of this story. Yes, this first installment. I'm speaking it loud and clear. So, I thought this chapter onwards would be the Decisive Arc, and yes, I would end this at 25 chapters... for real, before I move on to the next book - no, not that I simply can't write any more for this, it's just that it would be befitting to end it at 25. When Elise decides, that's the last chapter. I guarantee that. So, before that, chapters would sound dramatic with Xandor appearing more often not to be a psychotic madman, but an actual person. No, not doing it for the sake of writing chapters, but preparing the scene for book 2.

And of course, I won't tell you where Elise goes, or what in heck will happen inbetween. I believe this chapter gave you enough info to know though. Just the drama that's unknown. xd

Meanwhile... wait in anticipation. :D