CHAPTER 1-A Stolen Apple

I eat, I breathe, and I sleep. But am I alive? 

LoG, 303

Squinty woke up with a start. Her eyes desperately tried to adjust to the brightness, haloed around a shadow so close to her face.

A shadow?

A head!

It was Roko, sobbing above their bed.

"Squinty, I... Help me! Please! You have to help me!" His sniffles stopped any sort of meaningful understanding.

"Calm down, Roko. What is it?" She huffed at him as the horse might snort at an annoying fly it couldn't get rid of.

"A...a... an apple," he stammered. "I just... stole an apple!"

It didn't take Squinty long to process his fear, even in her groggy pre-breakfast state.

Apple was a big deal. Apple meant water.

In the orphanage, stealing was punishable by ever-increasing beatings, and since his sister's death, Roko had become something of a thief.

A lousy thief, who was consistently being caught.

Squinty glanced at the welts on his shoulders that still hadn't healed from the last time they pummelled him.

"Give me the apple," she said, "and move aside so I can get up."

He obeyed, scampering away from the bed.

"Now," Squinty leapt on her feet and outstretched her hand. "The apple, Roko. We'll just put it back before anybody notices. No big deal."

"I... I can't." Roko whimpered. "I've eaten it. I was so hungry and thirsty."

"You've eaten it already? Dammit. We have to think of something." Squinty brushed past him, flinging the grey sleeping gown to the corner of the dormitory.

She changed into a shabby, tattered dress with haste, and then foraged an eyeless rabbit plushie from under the grimy pillow.

Roko's huge brown eyes lit up.

"Can I carry Mr. Big Ears today? Just for a little while? He'll help the scare go away."

"No way!" Squinty snarled at him, burying the toy in her bosom. "No one ever holds Mr. Big Ears but me. Now, come on. Let's get to breakfast or they'll realize we're not there." She grabbed Roko by the hand and the two hurried towards the canteen.

Prior to entering the room, Squinty positioned her hair over the face.

The world didn't see her.

She didn't see the world.

As long as the world respected that deal, everything was in order.

Dozens of tables filled the vast stone room, occupied by numerous orphans.

The governesses sat at the main table at the farthest point from the entrance, chattering lively.

"Drat. We're late! The cooks had already served breakfast!" Squinty hissed, motioning Roko to squat. "This way!"

They picked the table closest to the door and sat down.

"Do you think they noticed we were gone?" Roko frowned at the sight of food in their plates. "Ewww! Corn porridge again."

"No idea. Shh!" Squinty brought her forefinger to her lips. "You're the one to complain. You already had breakfast!" She shoved the spoon to her mouth after a quick "Glory to the Mind."

The yellow mixture was sticky and Squinty slowly chewed on it with disgust.

"It... it's getting stuck in my throat..." Roko wheezed, gulping with difficulty.

"I hate it too. I could have sworn I'd swallowed a long hair that belong to a cook or a pebble from the bottom of the cauldron several times already!"

In her mind, Squinty added that pebble to the solid rock of hatred she felt for this place.

"Squinty...." Roko tugged at her sleeve and she noticed how dirty his face and his straw-blond hair were. "Will we ever leave?" He peered towards her hair curtain.

"You want to leave? That's what you want? An adult must come here, pick you and take you with them! That's how you'll leave."

"But... they only ever pick babies. And I'm already seven." Roko used the back of his hand to wipe the viscous boogers that dripped from his nostrils.

"What can I say? I'm twelve! Anyway... Even if they picked you, if you left... You'd never be free. You'd live with someone who chose you."

The bird would only move from one cage to another.

"I... I never thought about it like that." Roko frowned.

"If you want to leave this place for good, you have to esc..."

An angry scream broke out in the dining room, interrupting Squinty mid-line.

"There you are!" A chubby redhead girl almost crushed Roko in her onset as she pointed her thick finger towards his chest. "It was you!"

Enoka. Was it her apple that Roko took?

Squinty remained still.

This isn't your thing, she thought. Everybody for themselves.

"Get up, you little thieving rat!" Enoka bellowed, slapping Roko across the face with all her might.

The strength of the blow cast Roko aside, and he fell out of the chair, slamming his head against the floor.

Onlooking orphans murmured in discomfort, averting their eyes from the sight.

Enoka approached Roko. She lifted him from the ground as if he weighed next to nothing and brought his face close to hers.

"I'm going to ask this only once." She barked at Roko in a cold, courtly voice. "Where... is ... my ... apple... dirtbag?" The final word carried a mocking undertone.

Squinty's determination not to get involved was being sucked out of her as if by a vortex.

"Come on, speak up. Do you hear what I'm saying, Roko?" Enoka shook him by the shoulders. "Why aren't you responding? Shall we call you Mute?"

Tears rolled down Roko's reddened cheeks but he didn't reply.

"No matter." Enoka spat on the floor. "I know it was you." She lifted Roko's chin and forced him to look her in the eye.

"Listen, kid! Let this be the last time I catch you stealing my food. Otherwise, I'll tear your head off. Understood?"

Squinty pushed her chair back.

I can't take this anymore.

The screeching sound resonated in the silent room.

At first, surprise, and then, a mocking smile, bloomed on Enoka's face.

Squinty moseyed towards Roko, and the soft hiss that Mr. Big Ears produced as she dragged across the floor reverberated eerily along the canteen.

She now stood in front of her friend as a voiceless shield, her hands clenched into fists.

Roko took refuge behind her back, still sobbing.

Enoka's expression darkened.

She scowled and tapped her foot on the floor. "You stay out of this!"

"What if," Squinty muttered, "I took the apple?"

"You?" The single word carried the fury of the world within.

"Yes, me. Surprised, Enoka? I wanted a little snack before breakfast. Mind knows they feed us scraps here anyway, and we barely get any water, as is." Squinty licked her dry lips and then the corner of her mouth twisted in a challenging grin. "What are you going to do about it?"

Enoka charged and seized Squinty's arm.

Squinty's gaze darted to the now already chafed spot where Enoka's hand had dug in.

I'll remember this.

She glared at Enoka from under her mane and sank her teeth into her fingers.

Enoka leapt away from her with a yelp.

"Did you just bite me, you filthy urchin?" Disbelief shone through her voice.

"Don't. Ever. Touch. Me. No one touches me." Squinty growled, circling around older girl. "And you... You are as much of an urchin as I am."

Enoka sprung forward again without a warning and delivered a sharp blow to Squinty's temple.

All around her began to disappear in a misty swirl as she bit on her lips, closing her eyes.

Approaching staccato steps hammered the pain even more into Squinty's skull.

"That's quite enough of that, now, children. Did you hear me? Enoka! Go to your room." An authoritarian voice cracked with old age addressed Enoka.

"But, head governess..." Enoka started.

"Not another word from you. Your room. The apple shall be compensated to you from the common pantry at a later time," the head governess added.

"As for you, Squinty and Roko," the measured-cadence tones turned to them next. "You are well aware the thievery and fighting are not tolerated here at the Lagad orphanage. So it is only just that you receive a proper punishment. I'd like to see you in my office, please."


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