My eyes open to the sunlit room as I wake up wrapped in Mickey's arms. Mornings in my new bedroom were nearly unbearable. The sunlight through the huge window bounced around the small, white space so intensely. I haven't slept in once since moving here almost three months ago. I reach under the pillow for my phone and shut off my alarm four minutes before it was set to go off.

I look over my shoulder at Mickey as he spoons me. He's another person when he sleeps. His face is relaxed, but his brows crease slightly as if he's worried about something. I listen to his deep, even breaths as I stare at him, and my chest aches painfully.

The way I feel about him scares me. It's not the kind of fear that makes me want to run away. It's the fear that I will never be able to make him feel the way he makes me feel, the fear that I don't deserve him.

I let myself stare at him for a few moments before crawling out from between his arms, careful not to wake him. When I leave his grasp, he rolls to his stomach with a sigh but doesn't wake.

I'm able to shower, get dressed, and pack my bag before he catches me. "Walking out on me already?"

I look through the door and see him staring at me. He has that lazy smile on his face, his long hair tousled and sexy. Why does he have to be so goddamn handsome without trying? I walk over to him and he rolls towards me, leaving the blankets behind. He props himself up on his elbows as I crouch to meet him.

"I was trying not to wake you," I coo. I press my lips to his and linger longer than I should. I want him, but he's off limits right now. Our lips separate slowly and he pouts. "Don't look at me like that, Mickey. I won't want to leave."

He grins proudly. "Go. I'll see you tonight at the studio, right?"

"Right." He has a shoot. For some reason, he prefers I be there.

"Okay, good," he concedes. He gives me one more kiss before he flops to his back. I stand up and grab my things. "Have a great day, baby. I love you."

I grin happily. "I love you too," I tell him as I leave.

♡♡♡

It is lunchtime before I even realize. Half my day is gone and I don't feel like I've worked at all. I can barely remember why this place was my second choice. It's a beautiful facility and has a great teaching program. Sure, it doesn't have the reputation of my first pick, but that is probably a good thing. I could make a name for myself here, and I intend to. But to do that, I would have to be careful.

I am enjoying my fresh start, and being careful to monitor my bluntness in order to stay likable with my new coworkers. Right now, no one knows I'm a proud slut with a famous porn star for a boyfriend. We'll see how long that lasts.

People here are gossipy assholes, just like everywhere else. The doctors and nurses have been talking about the same nurse since I started, calling her "slut" this and "whore" that. So of course, I sought her out and befriended her. Us degenerates have to stick together.

She and I are always in passing during the day, so we get together at lunch in the cafeteria. It makes me feel so normal having a go-to lunch buddy. Not that I miss Jenna and Emma, but I guess I do miss their company.

"What did the delicious chef make you today?" Maggie asks me. There are so many M's in my life.

Maggie is mid-thirties and looks like a nurse from a TV medical drama -- way too pretty, hair too well styled to be working doubles in a hospital. It was hard to believe she had a 15-year-old kid. But most people don't know about my kid either.

"I think this is a green goddess salad with seared salmon," I say as I show it to her. Mickey always packs my lunches for the week ahead of time. He's domestic as fuck.

Her gray eyes widen. "Shit, he's a chef! Tell me he's hideous. Please." I talk about Mickey as little as I can manage. It's harder than I expected.

"No, he's a model. He's gorgeous." I show her the backdrop of my phone, a PG-13 version of one of his Instagram posts.

Her mouth drops open as she looks at him. "Are you fucking kidding me? Where did you find this guy?" She smiles as she bites into her carrot stick careful not to disturb her perfect lipstick. She always has on the perfect shade of red that coordinates with her pale skin and maroon-colored hair.

"It's a funny story, actually. At some point in the first two minutes, I complimented his cock."

She tosses her head back as she laughs heartily. "Oh my god!"

I laugh with her as pour the dressing over my salad and begin to mix it. "Lucky for me he was into it, and now the rest is history," I say with a smile as she calms herself.

I take a few bites of my delicious salad, trying to distract myself from the small bit of nervousness I feel. I hate the part of adulthood where you awkwardly have to decide whether your friendship is dependent on the location in which it was founded. Are we friends or are we just work friends?

"You should come over for dinner one weekend," I tell her bluntly. "Michael loves to cook for a group."

She looks excited and that makes me happy. "Could I really?"

"Yeah, absolutely. Whenever is good for you."

"I'll be out of town for the next two weeks," she says almost hesitantly. "I would do it this weekend, but that's such short notice."

"Two weeks? Are you going on vacation?"

"No. It's still work." She's being secretive.

"You don't work enough here? What is your other job?" I ask her. She looks at me sideways as if she doesn't want to answer.

She chews her pasta slowly before muttering, "I work at a ... house in Nevada."

I'm confused. "Are you a maid?"

"Penny, no," she says. She leans closer to me and whispers, "A whore house."

My eyes widen. Maggie is a prostitute? That's why people hate her? What judgmental little fuckers! "Wow! Okay," I say with a huge smile.

She eyes me as she chews her final bite. "That's it? 'Okay'? You have no other questions?"

"I mean, yeah, of course. But most are technique related, so I'll save them for when we're not at work," I joke.

She laughs, and I can tell she trusts me. "You're so great, Penny. I wish more people were like you."

"People are shit, myself included," I tell her between chewing. "But I know the judgment from other people must be really hard on you."

"The judgment is one thing. The loneliness is another," she says truthfully before sipping her drink. "I'm literally one of the best lays anyone could ever have, yet I am doomed to be single the rest of my life."

"Why would you say that?"

She sighs heavily. "It's hard enough finding someone real in LA. Then add being 35, with a kid, and fucking people for money on top of it? Not gonna happen."

I find the irony hilarious. "I did it."

"You did what?"

"Got in a relationship with someone who fucks other people for money." She gives me an extremely confused look. "Maggie, my boyfriend is a porn star." Her eyes widen. "A really well-known one, too."

"Are you serious? Why didn't you tell me?"

"Probably the same reason you didn't tell me." She covers her mouth with a hand, but I can still see her wide smile behind it. Her gray eyes gleam. Yeah, we're best friends now.

My phone vibrates and my heart drops when I see the name "Mom" on my screen. I stare at it for a moment before ignoring the call. I haven't talked to her since before I graduated. My heart races thinking of why she would be calling me now.

"Why didn't you answer that?" Maggie asks suspiciously.

"We ... haven't been on great terms for a while. She wasn't thrilled when I decided to move out here to be with Michael, and ... It's a long story."

"I know what long stories mean. Don't worry about it," she says as she gathers her plate and glass. "But speaking as a mom, call her back, okay?" I twist my mouth, but I can't argue with her. "I'll see you tomorrow, girlie."

"Okay. Bye!"

She walks away with a wave, leaving me alone with my salad. I pick up my phone and look at the missed call. She had three months to call me but she didn't, and now all of a sudden she misses me? I doubt it. Sorry, mom. Better luck next time.

♡♡♡

I make it to the studio a little past six. Mickey is set to shoot at six-thirty, so I am a little stressed. I would have preferred to be here much earlier to help him get ready. I find him standing at the edge of the set. "Mickey, I'm sorry, traffic was horrible," I say as I run over to him.

He gives me a happy smile. "Traffic is always horrible, baby. It's LA." He pulls my face to his and kisses me.

His kiss is more seductive than a typical greeting, his minty tongue teasing mine. He's already in the zone for his scene. He's wearing a plain white t-shirt with well-fitting gray chinos. It's the perfect palette to go with the sterile, all-white set, but more than anything, all of it comes off very easily.

I reach into his pants and wrap my hand around him. I stroke it slowly, feeling him begin to harden beneath my touch. I know my job.

"Mmm, I love you," he hums against my lips.

"I love you too."

"Ready, Mickey?" A voice calls from behind him.

I look over and see Miranda standing next to the director. She's disgustingly gorgeous, the kind of not-quite-natural beauty that is impossible for anyone to ignore. She has long, black hair and blue eyes that stare into your soul. She's tall and fit with flawless, tan skin and an hourglass figure. Not to mention her tits and ass which are apparently impervious to the fucking laws of gravity. Ugh.

She's a self-loathing level of attractive. She's also the second M in Mickey's crossover company 3M. Porn is a small, pretty world.

Mickey nips my lips once more. "Yeah, I'm ready."

He laces his fingers through mine and I walk with him to the edge of the set before letting him go. As they get started, I focus my attention on the condoms, opening one to get ready for him before setting it aside.

I feel hands squeeze my ass and I jump. I turn around quickly to find Ailene. "I know that hot, little ass anywhere!" she says with a wide smile.

"Hi," I say happily as I wrap my arms around her shoulders.

She presses her body tight against mine as she hugs me, one of her hands casually resting on my ass. Ailene has zero boundaries. I guess you can't fuck random people on camera and then decide to have personal space issues. "How are you pretty girl?" she says into my shoulder.

"I'm great."

A newly naked Mickey comes over for the condom. I reach up and hand it to him, still enclosed in Ailene's grasp. He gives me a grin as he walks away.

"You are so perfect for him," Ailene says. "I'm always so impressed how chill you are about everything. You're even cool with Miranda."

I give her a confused look. "Why is me liking Mickey's business partner such a big deal?" I ask.

"Business partner?" She gives me a quizzical glance. "You know they used to be in a relationship, right?"

My heart drops. "What? No. When?"

"Oh, it was just a little thing that didn't work out. It was a while ago," she tries to cover as she looks away nervously.

"A while ago," I repeat.

"I think they realized they worked better together professionally rather than ... otherwise."

Otherwise? Are you fucking kidding me? "Oh ... okay. Great."

My skin aches with a mix of emotions I can't quite place. I look over to the set and watch Miranda lying in the bed on her stomach as she sucks Mickey's cock. He brushes his fingers through her hair as he reclines back on an arm. I don't feel well.

"Penny," Ailene says as she shakes my shoulders. I look back to her and try to hide the emotions from my face. "Don't worry about it. It isn't a big deal."

"No, of course it isn't," I say with cutting sarcasm I know she won't pick up on. Fucking your ex-girlfriend who you just so happen to own a company with isn't a big deal at all.

Not at all.

_____

A/N: Don't forget to vote, comment, and add to your library if you want more!