We met out dates and brought them to the spots we chose. My place overlooked the ocean, which was kinda freezing, but I brought my jacket for her to wear. I don't mind the cold that much.

Crystalia was a fantastic person. She liked my sandwiches, which made her good in my book, and she loved to read romance novels that usually make other people cringe! If that isn't a lovely quality, I don't know what it is!

She also loved to garden. Even if we don't work out, I am ordering a greenhouse be made for her and her only. She sounds like the kind of woman who could handle all of that work and labor.

We got to talking, and she seemed like a charming lady. She laughed at my absolutely terrible jokes, made some herself, and she even held my hand. She instigated physical contact first! And she leaned in for a kiss.

And I panicked. All I could think about was that I would have to marry Royce in two weeks for so, and I can't let Caitlyn go through that.

Caitlyn. She is my childhood friend. The one person who truly understands. The one person who gets where I am coming from. Not even Royce understands like she does.

Right before our lips touch, I pull away. She looks hurt.

"I'm sorry. I can't."

"I understand. Not everyone likes to kiss."

"It's not that. It's just, I don't think I can marry you."

"Hun, we have a long way to go before even having to worry about that-"

"Look me dead in the eye and say that again."

She looked into my eyes, and she knew exactly who I was. Her eyes widened, and she looked worried.

"I have to report you."

"I am looking for someone to marry."

"I am going to be the one to send you back..."

"I am being forced to hide my sexuality or be arrested for going against my father's orders."

"I can't do it."

"Then don't!"

"Why should I?"

"I get to have a good life? One that I choose?"

"Oh! Fine! I'll let you go. When do you leave?"

"Tomorrow."

"Then, I'll see you off?"

"Of course. Do you want to bring the basket home?"

"Yeah..."

"Then go ahead!"

And she took the basket and left. I wished that she was the one. Now it looked like I'll have to marry Royce. Caitlyn will be so disappointed.

How am I supposed to face her? She gave me enough time to find someone, but no one can compare to my standards.

They have to be kind, like my jokes, eat whatever I decide to make on my own, read books with me, and love me for who I am. Not what I am.

And that seems to meet everyone I have found. But what was missing? I'd have to find out in the next couple of hours before my departure.

I sulked my way to the gay bar, Royce needing a little bit, and got drunk. So drunk, I needed Royce to come to get me after he got worried, drunk. I was going to feel that tomorrow. And we get on the boat at five in the afternoon tomorrow. So hopefully, my hangover is gone by then.

While asleep, I dreamt of many things. All seemingly having something to do with pink roses. This made my day. I love pink roses and what they symbolize.

Anyway, I had no headache, surprisingly, when I woke up. I slept walked to get myself situated for this morning. Fun!

Royce was up and gone by the time I was up, and our room was ready to be checked out. I kinda laid on the floor for about two hours before he came back, and I had a lot to think about.

And then it hit me.