Anticipated Secrets
A/N-So this chapter is formatted a little bit differently, not like a story, but like individual scenes, of which you will see three...
Bharma
Every single day since the railing had broken, Bharat and Mandavi would meet up at 2 o' clock sharp to take walks around the trees and flowers in the garden, to talk or just simply stroll in each other's company. They would discuss many things, from deep things like how the universe was created, to simple topics, like love and living.
They had never anticipated that one day, they would be walking as not just simple friends, secret crushes, but as betrothed. They never thought that some of their dreams of marriage and true love might come true. Neither could apprehend the future, and neither expected the other to show up.
Mandavi stood under the cherry blossom tree, twirling a tiny pink flower anxiously between her fingers as the rest slowly fell off the twigs. It would be awkward, to know that they would eventually have to marry each other. How could such an innocent friendship suddenly morph into something so romantic, straight out of those romance books Shrutakirti read? She looked around, not expecting anyone to arrive.
And yet, there was the steadily approaching figure of Bharat, his shoulders squared and set in such a way that he looked determined. Mandavi's heart sank. Determined to reject her, perhaps? Was he about to convey the fact that he did not like her enough to marry her? Was it possible? "You showed up," she muttered, looking down at her feet. "I didn't think you would, seeing as-" Bharat cut her off.
"How could I miss it? Ruin such a tradition?" He shook his head as if surprised she had ever thought so little of him. Slowly, like a well-oiled machine, they began to walk around the trees again, the atmosphere tense between them. Mandavi began to slowly pluck off the petals one by one off the flower, and Bharat's eyes caught her movement.
Licking his lips, he took a deep, shuddery breath, and Mandavi closed her eyes tight. He was about to say it, about to reject her, deny her hand in marriage. She also took a large inhalation, vowing not to let go until he said the imminent words, when he told her that he didn't want her. When he walked away.
"I-ah-" he began, but Mandavi couldn't stand it. She had to say something. "I'll be kind, and nice, and I won't talk at all, no matter how hard it is! I will be the perfect wife and I will never be unfaithful, though that goes without saying, and I'll be the best daughter-in-law ever! Please don't reject me, if not for me, for my sisters! They need me, don't you see? The alliance might break, and then Sita will never marry, stubborn as she is!" she burst out, tears streaming out of her eyes.
Bharat was stricken, and turned around, grasping her clasped hands in his. His eyebrows curved up in empathy, and he began to speak. "I was never about to reject you, I thought you would reject me! I-I, just came here to say, that I." he cleared his throat, and wiped away some of her tears gently. "I just came to say that I-I-love you!" He turned away from her, letting out a breath. There, it was over.
Mandavi gaped, jaw dropped, at him. He loved her? Was it possible that someone could love her for the loud, angry self she was? Was it true? He must be fibbing, lying. But Bharat was not capable of lying. She swallowed hard, and spoke again, her voice strengthening.
"I would never reject you. I-ahem. I might." she looked down as Bharat turned his face around painfully to look at her, eyes wide. "I might-um." He bit his lip, urging her on in anticipation. "I might also love you back!" she squeaked, and both of them froze from their laps around the tree, before turning towards each other. What now?
Mandavi extended a hand, and Bharat shook it, before they silently continued walking circles around the old cherry blossom, faces straight ahead, glancing at each other when the other one wasn't looking. And so Bharma was done.
Shatru-Kirti
"Look at today's loot! Ladoos, sweets, and milk cakes galore! I even snagged a few aloo papdis! Isn't that amazing? Just wonderful!" cried Shatrughan, looking through the day's worth of steal excitedly, as how Bharat may page through a book. Shrutakirti sat across from him, eying the sweets curiously, before looking up at him, wincing.
"You weren't there, and I managed to grab even more! Amateur." he snorted, before looking up at her insistent face, and back down at the foods. "And look, I even got a few toffee candies that the chef likes making for Bharat and Ram bhaiyya. And, of course, some chili pepper covered mangoes, thought we could try them and see if they were as spicy as Lakshman bhaiyya makes them to be." He shrugged.
"We are going to have to eventually talk about it, you know, Shatru? Don't avoid it please, I tried to, and I couldn't! We're going to be married! We're going to have to...I don't know! Marry? I don't know whether to be excited or nervous or anticipatory or to just stomp my foot and grit my teeth and take it all and throw it out the window!" Shrutakirti exclaimed, grabbing at her hair, eyebrows racing up into her forehead as she teetered back and forth on her cushion.
Shatrughan nodded slowly, sighing, and leaning back in his chair, glancing at the girl whom he was about to marry in defeat. He had tried so hard to veer away from it, be best friends till the very moment before they were married. He wouldn't be able to stand it if she said she was only doing it so that their siblings could live happily ever after.
"I know." he muttered. "But first, let's eat." He gestured towards the entire pile of foodstuffs laid in front of them, from sweets to savories, and sour candies and toffees, and fruits, which he had disgustedly laid aside, to jars of spicy and sweet jams and preserves. The biggest array they had ever stolen.
"I wholeheartedly agree!" cried Shrutakirti, leaning forward, grabbing a ladoo, and taking a tentative bite as Shatrughan stared confusedly at her. He would never not be surprised at how princess(ly) she did everything, from stealing to eating, and everything in between. Shaking his head, he stuffed an entire ladoo into her mouth.
Shrutakirti giggled, and realized that she wouldn't care if she spent the rest of her lifetime with this ridiculous prince, his thieving escapades, and his unprincely and unpredictable conduct. "I love you!" she laughed, not realizing what she was saying and taking another bite of her sweet, laughing some more at his flabbergasted face, not knowing how her words had affected him, or why he was making that face.
Shatrughan gaped at her, jaw dropped, heart leaping into his throat making him cough endlessly. Had she just realized what she had said? Did she mean it so lightheartedly that she didn't realize it? Was love such a small, insignificant thing for her? But no. Shrutakirti always told the solemn truth. Which meant that she did love him. He didn't have to worry about anything. He smiled at her, wiping a small crumb away from her mouth and staring at his giggling soon-to-be-wife.
He took a deep breath as her tinkling laughter continued to fill the air as a light background music to his ears. "I love you too." he muttered, taking another tentative bite of his ladoo as well, and thinking that for once, he wasn't choking on his food, and that maybe taking human sized bites was not so bad after all. Shatru-Kirti had now, albeit half-unknowingly anyways, confessed.
Lakshmila
Urmila, walking down the halls of the palace slowly, looked around for her betrothed. Where could he be, for he wasn't strolling in the gardens. He wasn't with his brother. He wasn't eating in the dining hall. He wasn't out in the courtyard. He had practically disappeared. And then the obvious struck her. He was surely in the weapons room!
She threw open the heavy steel doors, embossed with the crest of Mithila, and looked around. Not near the spears. Not near the maces. Not even near the bows and arrows, the area where she thought he had the most prowess in! No, Lakshman was busy sitting on the ground, looking into the distance, where 2 large, golden bows were hung on the wall.
"What are you doing?" she asked, her voice breaking the thick, heavy silence that had rested upon them like a disease. Lakshman slowly turned his head to look up at her, his eyes somber and heavy.
"I-I don't know. I'm not sure." He swallowed, taking a deep breath. "I'm going to marry you soon." Urmila nodded. What was going on? Did he not want to marry her? Did he have some problem? Did-did he not love her? "But I can't! I can't marry you! It isn't possible, can't you see? I just, I can't!" he stood up agitatedly, pacing around the room as Urmila's eyes followed him silently.
"And why can't you marry me?" she asked hesitantly. "I don't understand, is there some problem? Do you just like being a bachelor, or is there someone you want invited to the wedding that isn't?" she proposed tentatively. Please, let it not be what she thought it was, please.
"No! It's that I don't love you!" he cried. "I don't love you, Mila, I don't!" Something seemed heavy in his voice. As if he couldn't handle the pain. Or the mistruth of it. Urmila's heart hammered as she took a step back. Then another, then another as he ran a hand through his hair, muttering to himself and continuously walking around some more, managing to kick over a heavy steel basket in his agitation.
"What?" she whispered. "Y-you, what?" He looked up. "Is there someone else? Is it that you love someone else?" she asked, her voice hardening as jealousy consumed her. "Are your attentions directed elsewhere perhaps? Is that the case?" Lakshman shook his head, grasping his dagger, and opening his mouth, then closing it. "Spit it out!" Urmila snapped. "You love someone else, don't you?"
"No!" Lakshman cried equally furiously. "No, I don't!" truth vibrated in his voice like strings on a violin, and Urmila quieted down. So there was no one else. He just didn't like her. "I, I tried. I tried saying, thinking to myself, that I don't love you, many, many times, you won't believe it. I do. I love you." Confusion and relief flooded Urmila's mind. His voice was free of the burden of mistruth that there had been the first time. He was speaking truths.
"I just don't love you enough, can't you see? My loyalties are split, between my brother, whom I would give this world up for, and you, for whom I would give up heaven to follow anywhere. I-I can't do this." Urmila nodded. "I can't marry you because in any case, I'll always have to choose Ram bhaiyya, and it's not fair to you! You have to marry me, me. You don't even like me, but you have to marry me, and you don't get anything in return, no privileges, nothing!" he cried, clasping his hands together. "But, I can't see you marry anyone else either," he muttered to himself, shaking his head.
Urmila exhaled. "I don't hate you," he looked up curiously. "I don't, I really do love you back." his jaw dropped. "I understand, for I have many loyalties towards Sita , my sister, with whom I share a bond that I do not with anyone else, but Lakshman, you have to understand, your loyalties are not split! You have a brotherly dedication towards your brother and one of love, I think, to me." she smiled.
"I understand your apprehension." she took a deep breath, before her eyes popped. Oh no! Did she just-confess? God, she hated her stupid mouth, how things just slipped out of it like she was holding a slippery fish. She had meant for the confesion to be kind, and meaningful. And here she was, having said it so emotionlessly, unintentionally. They stared at each other, gaping, for a second, and their own daring. Was it possible?
"You love me," Lakshman repeated. "-and, I love you." he contemplated this thought confusedly while Urmila laughed. "Maa Sumitra always said that I would find someone, some day, that would be able to deal with my tempers, my fierceness, and my stubbornness with equal." He looked up, beaming. "You're that equal!"
Urmila poked his shoulder. "Not equal, I am better than you! Besides, you're not fierce, you're a little cutie." Lakshman frowned, crossing his shoulders and stomping on the ground, pouting like a little child about to throw a temper tantrum.
"Am not-" "Are too!" With that, he began to chase her through the halls, almost catching her at every corner before she turned randomly and ran a different way. Ram and Sita watched this from the garden, swinging on a long wooden plank hung on a tree.
"You know," Ram began. "I don't think I've ever told you this, but-" Sita looked up at his face, filled with emotion. "I love you Sita." he said, nodding with certainty, as if he finally had come to terms with it. She grinned at his innocent confession,and putting her head on his shoulder as the gentle swinging of the plank continued, fuelled by the passing breeze, smiled.
"I love you too."
A/N- This chapter might be one of the most beautiful things I've ever written. It maybe didn't do the ships justice, or didn't match what you had in mind, but it really was refreshing to write, and I finished it quite quickly. Right now, as I look outside the window, a breeze is blowing by. The trees rustle like they are whispering to each other, "Stay Strong! Don't Fall!", and the branches are replying, perhaps, with reassuring quips.
It took so many chapters to finally reach this stage, when we finally have them confess. This may be one of the longest dragging stories ever written. I never plan to speed up however, in my retelling. Who knows? Maybe one day, I'll compile all of these chapters into a brand new Ramayana book, complete with illustrations and all! Wouldn't that be nice?
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