Lesson 40: Never Give Up the Ship

Grielle paused before the window of her bedchamber. A lavender sliver of dawn bloomed on the horizon; morning was only an hour away. The kitchens would already be awake to prepare for the evening's masquerade, but she still had time. Time to run. She shoved the remainder of her clothes into her satchel and belted her scabbard around her waist.

Benedikt deserved to find his True Love. If he married her, he would never get the chance. He would never know for sure and she didn't want to leave that question unanswered. Perhaps he would always wonder if he missed out on finding his True Love if he chose her to be his queen.

"Queen," Grielle laughed as she set the diamonds Benedikt had given her on the pillow of her bed. The idea of her as queen of anything seemed just as preposterous as True Love's Kiss. Sure, Benedikt believed in True Love and Happily Ever Afters, but he was a prince. She should have known better than to get caught up in all the romance of it.

No, she belonged out in the world, moving silently among the people — a thief for hire like her father.

Before she could leave her chamber, the massive, satin gown that couldn't quite be contained by her wardrobe caught her eye. Her throat thickened with feeling, but she swallowed it. She didn't want to think how Benedikt would react when he found out she was leaving, that she wouldn't be at the ball. She'd left a note on the table beside her bed and it hurt to recall its contents:

Dear Ben,

I can't stay. I don't want you to settle for me.
You deserve to find your True Love and I sincerely hope you do.

I'm sorry,
Grielle

A part of her wanted to hold him one last time, but if she saw him, she knew her resolve would crumble.

"No goodbyes," she whispered, closing the door to her chamber behind her.

It would be better this way.

The corridors were deserted and dark while everyone slept off their food and drink from the banquet. With only Kai to accompany her, Grielle stole through the halls. She ducked between shadowed corners until she reached the front door. A guard stood at the entrance to the castle keep; Grielle wondered if he would question her leaving at such an hour.

She straightened, stepped out of the shadows and crossed to where the guard watched the door.

"Good morning," she said with a nod to the rather scruffy-looking man with the halberd. "I'm off for a little dawn exercise."

Up close Grielle could see dark circles under his eyes and a shiny scar across his cheek. He seemed alarmed at being addressed and gave Grielle a quick nod. He turned his face away as she passed, giving her cause for concern. Perhaps it was because she was wearing trousers? She hadn't thought Stalvarts so modest. Furthermore, she'd chewed some herbs before she left, so she knew she didn't have morning troll breath.

Once out of the castle keep, she forgot the guard's behavior. A few people milled about the streets, opening shops for the day. Others tossed the evening's chamber pots into the gutters.

Grielle pulled her fur lined cloak closer as the chill of night air hung heavy on the streets. Near the port, she stopped in a tavern and purchased a closet of a room for a single gold coin.

"Last room we have. You in town for the masquerade?" the wheezy, squat woman who owned the public house said when Grielle asked for a room. "We got lots of strange folks from the outer towns in for the festivities. You look to be about marrying age."

"No. Just passing through."

"We don't get very many folks just passing through here in the north," she said, giving Grielle a once over.

Grielle regretted not thinking of a better excuse. Her clothes from the castle were too clean to be the clothes of a traveler or tradeswoman. "My business is my business," she said with a scowl.

The woman shrugged and handed her a key.

After hiding her belongings away from the sticky fingers of the tavern patrons, Grielle lay down on the bed. It smelled of damp straw. She turned to her side, thinking of the warm, soft bed she'd just given up. A deep, aching sadness welled in her, but there was no turning back now. At any moment her maids would enter her room to find her note for Benedikt. There was no way to stop what she had already started.

She thought of Moose, Reyn, and Ludvig. They would be furious when they found out she'd left them. But she couldn't have asked them to go with her when they could still be part of Benedikt's royal guard. They would never be able to pull jobs like they used to with only four people. The only employment for them now was in Benedikt's care.

Either way, she had more pressing needs now. She let Kai loose to hunt, and set out for the docks to secure passage on a ship out of Stalvart. For her own sake, she needed to get out of the city before Benedikt announced his True Love to the kingdom. Her heart was already broken, but that, she was sure, would stop it completely.

~

Benedikt awoke to the rapping of knuckles on the door to his bedchamber. He slumped out of bed and groggily wiped sleep from his eyes. Sunlight streamed through the paned windows and he had to squint to see where he was going.

Another knock came at the door.

"I'm coming," he said through a yawn.

He wasn't sure why the person even bothered to knock. The servants usually just barged in whether he wanted them there or not. He yanked the door open and found Ludvig on the other side.

"What is it?" he asked, resting his head on the doorframe.

"Wake up, kid. We have a bit of a problem," Ludvig said, striding into the room. Reyn and Moose followed close behind.

Benedikt's stomach dropped at the pitying looks they were giving him.

"What's going on?"

Suddenly wide awake, he picked up a shirt from where he had tossed it onto the floor before going to sleep and threw it on.

Reyn handed him a piece of parchment with his name scrawled on it. "Grielle's maids woke me. They found this in her room and she doesn't seem to be anywhere in the castle. I checked myself."

Benedikt took the parchment with a trembling hand. He turned his back to the others as he read. He took in a ragged breath as Grielle's words sank in. She'd left him. Benedikt rounded on the others. "Did you all read this?" he asked, crumpling the letter in his fist.

They shook their heads.

"She's gone so I can have a chance to find my True Love. She says — she says she doesn't want me to settle for her," Benedikt told them, the words shocking even himself.

"I don't believe it," Moose said, a tremble in his voice. "She loves you and you love her. You'd have to be blind not to see that you're her True Love."

"Aye, I had my suspicions from the moment you two set eyes on each other," Ludvig said with an incredulous look on his face.

"We have to cancel the ball," Benedikt said. He dragged his hands through his hair, working out the tangles.

"Not yet," Reyn said, chewing her cuticle, brow furrowed.

"What?" Benedikt staid. "If Grielle isn't there, I will have to choose someone else. The council was adamant about that. I need to start my regency three weeks from now, and I need my True Love by my side."

"I'm with you, but we can't force Grielle into this," Ludvig said.

Benedikt nodded. He didn't want Grielle to feel trapped, pressured into being with him if she truly didn't want this. She wanted him to find his True Love, but there had to be a bigger reason than that for her to up and leave with only a note.

"I won't force her into anything, but if anyone can talk sense into her, I think I can," Reyn said with conviction.

"I'm not sure..." Benedikt said. His hands were clammy and he felt like he was going to be ill at any moment.

"Get ready for the masquerade as you planned. We can't have you shirking your duty to your kingdom. I'll find Grielle and she'll be there...of her own free will," Reyn said.

Benedikt shrugged. "If you find her, just tell her I love her. I'm waiting for her, but I can only wait until midnight."

She nodded and marched for the door of his bedchamber.

"Wait!" Benedikt said, rushing to the trunk at the foot of his bed. He tossed aside some rumpled shirts and found the pearly, satin mask he'd requested for Grielle. He crossed to the door and handed it to Reyn.

"For Grielle. If she agrees to come."

Reyn took the mask and departed.

Benedikt slumped against the wall, feeling like all the air had been sucked from his lungs. Ludvig and Moose excused themselves quietly to follow after Reyn and help her locate Grielle. Lost in thought, Benedikt barely heard their goodbyes. He couldn't seem to wrap his head around what Grielle had done. Tears threatened to roll down his cheeks, and yet his anger surprised him.

She'd abandoned him — left him to learn to live without her. Everything had just started to make sense. Life wasn't any easier with Grielle at his side, but it was a whole lot easier to face. They were each strong where the other wasn't — a perfect team. And she had to go and mess it all up.

Even broken, he would have given anything to have her back. He paced the length of his chambers. The sun was already above the mountains; the masquerade would begin at dusk. They didn't have much time, but he hoped beyond hope that Reyn would find her before it was too late.