Lesson 28: If You're Going to Lose Sleep, Lose It Together

Grielle lay on her bed, her eyes cast upon the exposed wood beams of the ceiling. Hours had passed without sleep and her thoughts turned to one person alone. She hated herself for pushing Benedikt away, but what could she do now? He needed to find his True Love and their relationship was so much more uncertain than that. She pinched the bridge of her nose and pressed her eyes closed.

"Get it together," she growled at the darkness.

In a few weeks, King Sander would pay them their fee and she and the rest of Liberators would put this entire ordeal behind them. Maybe. Perhaps she would use her cut of the exorbitant fee King Sander had offered to buy a little cottage on the beaches of Linnea.

She tried to keep her mind on the balmy breezes of a far-off kingdom when a gentle knock sounded at her door. Pulling on her new robe, she slipped from the warmth of her bed and crossed the room. She opened the door slowly, unsure of who would come knocking at such an hour. Her pulse roared at the sight of Benedikt standing in the hall, illuminated by the candle he held in his hand.

"I can't sleep," he said sheepishly. "May I come in?"

Grielle opened the door wide for him to enter.

Benedikt gasped as he stepped into the cold room. "Why do you have the window open? It's positively frigid in here." He trembled with a violent shiver. Rubbing warmth into his arms, he took in Grielle's small room and set his candle on the windowsill.

She shrugged. "So Kai can get to me if he needs to. I tried leaving it closed, but he's been antsy ever since the forest. Here." Grielle pulled the fur blanket from her bed and placed it over Benedikt's shoulders, then took a seat.

Benedikt shifted nervously on his feet.

"Is everything all right?" she asked.

He took a hesitant step towards her and then slowly lowered himself to sit beside her. "Nothing is right anymore," he whispered.

"I'm sorry," Grielle said as she tried to meet his downcast eyes.

"Don't be. Don't ever be sorry!" he exclaimed.

To her surprise, he gave her a wide smile that crinkled the corners of his eyes. He took her hand in his and intertwined their fingers. "True Love's Kiss aside, ever since I was young I knew that one day I would have to marry to fulfill my duty to my kingdom. My life has been dedicated to one thing, and that is doing what my kingdom asks of me. I've never let anyone get close to me as you have because I knew nothing could come of it. I told myself to keep my feelings in check but you weaseled your way under my skin."

Grielle laughed breathlessly at Benedikt's smile but steadied herself as his eyes softened. "Eventually you worked your way into my heart."

"Ben," she began but faltered for words.

She placed a hand behind Benedikt's neck and pulled him forward. He closed his eyes and let his forehead rest against hers. Grielle's breath caught in the back of her throat as he wrapped his arm around her waist.

"I love you," Benedikt whispered as he drew her body against his. "And I would do anything for you."

Grielle's heart felt like it might jump right out of her chest as she ran her hands over Benedikt's taught arms and let her fingers tangle in his dark hair. It was still damp from a recent bath. She heaved a sigh and brought her lips near his.

"Benedikt," she breathed, savoring his name as it danced off her tongue. "I don't know how long I have had to lie to myself. But I have been in such pain denying my affections for you because I know how you put your kingdom before yourself. I never thought you would..."

Love me. As I love you. She couldn't say it out loud. Not yet, anyway. Something held her tongue, and it wasn't for lack of desire. She loved him. She wanted him all to herself, but deep in her gut, a cautious sense of self-preservation drove her to press her lips closed around the tender words she knew the prince waited eagerly to hear.

Benedikt drew his face away. "I have spent way too long denying myself what I want. And I want you."

Grielle's cheeks burned as Benedikt pulled her in even tighter. His lips brushed hers ever so slightly and with eyes closed, she let her mouth press into his. She couldn't say "I love you," but she could kiss him. Granted, she had kissed him before, but for some reason, it seemed like everything had changed since that night in the forest of Bleakwood.

Benedikt's lips moved gently at first, but their pent-up passion quickly erupted from a spark to a flame. Grielle all but forgot the reply she should have made with the cold pouring through her window and the warmth from Benedikt's body melting through her nightdress. Her skin burned with the sensation of his strong hands on her waist. Without breaking their kiss, she grabbed the collar of Benedikt's shirt and pulled him further onto her small bed. She let her head sink back into her pillow and positioned Benedikt above her. He trailed kisses along her jaw and down her neck.

"Benedikt," she breathed as he pressed his lips to the hollow of her collarbone.

"I love you," Benedikt breathed against the bare flesh of her neck, sending a shiver through her limbs.

Grielle sighed as she brought Benedikt's face back to hers. His lips crashed into hers with fervor. Her hands traveled beneath his shirt, feeling the taut muscles of his back.

She all but lost the ability to breathe. Her head swam from the lack of air, but she knew where this was going. She grasped the hem of Benedikt's shirt to pull it over his shoulders, but a shrill scream echoed from the open window, and they froze. Grielle lifted her head from the down pillow.

"Was that what I think it was?" Her heart pounded in her chest but only half out of fear. She knew the sound well even though she'd heard it only once before.

"Are the stables below your window?" Benedikt asked her, his face still inches from hers.

"Yes. I've only heard a horse make that noise once before, and it was because a wolf had wandered near our camp."

Benedikt sat up as she spoke. Grielle wrapped her arms around his waist, suddenly feeling the bitter cold.

"We should probably check on them. The stable hands have likely turned in," Grielle said.

She reluctantly released Benedikt and pulled on the new fur-lined boots Reyn had purchased for her.

"I agree," Benedikt replied, but without much enthusiasm.

Grielle would have much rather spent the night wrapped in Benedikt's arms than out in the cold checking on horses, but her instincts got the best of her.

Once she had her new cloak on, they headed to Benedikt's room and he threw on his own cloak. The halls of the inn were empty, though the oil lamps remained lit for any late-night guests who might have arrived. The taproom was similarly empty save for the hearth, which glowed amber with a dying fire. They ducked out the front door and Grielle immediately regretted leaving her room. A cold wind blew right through the thin bedclothes beneath her cloak.

The stable sat around the corner from the inn. They didn't dawdle as their breath swirled in fleeting clouds around their pink-tinged faces. An arched door welcomed them into the darkened stables along with the quiet swish of tails and the sharp scent of hay and horse.

"We should find a lamp or candle or something," Grielle whispered as she grappled in the dark to find Benedikt's hand.

~

Almost instinctively, Benedikt reached for Grielle's hand and found it searching for his. The feeling sent a fleeting warmth through his chest which was quickly replaced by an unshakable sense of danger. He couldn't see much, but he could hear the sound of restless horses pacing about in their stalls, aware of some danger unbeknownst to him. A horse nickered close to his head, causing him to jump.

"Here." He pulled Grielle over to what must have been the stable hands' stall for storing the tacking supplies.

With eyes better adjusted to the dark, he found an oil lantern and the steel and flint to light it. The light illuminated the hazy stable air with a warm glow. They headed back to check their horses and found that most had their ears back and were puffing clouds of hot air from their soft noses.

Grielle laughed quietly as they found their old packhorses at the back of the barn. "These guys don't look bothered in the slightest."

Benedikt held the lantern up to illuminate the stall, and sure enough, the brown mare slept blissfully unaware of their presence. "But something has definitely spooked the young ones."

They turned at the sound of footsteps shuffling through hay and a young stable boy jogged into view of the lantern. He was a spry-looking boy with the gangly arms and legs of youth. A pair of tired eyes peered through his mop of untidy blonde hair. He looked a bit confused to find two strangers in the barn at such an hour.

"What's going on?" he asked wearily. "I heard one of the horses scream."

"Us too," Benedikt replied. "We were up, so we thought we would come to check."

A few curious horses poked their heads through the doors of their stalls at the sound of the stable hand's voice — probably eager for an impromptu meal.

"Something seems to have spooked them, but since we walked through they seem to have settled," Grielle offered.

The boy nodded, his matted hair flopping over his forehead. He patted a black mare on her snout, clicking his tongue in a way that felt relaxing even to Benedikt. "There, there," he cooed for the beast.

"I guess we'll head in, then," Benedikt said as he took a backward step towards the gaping stable door.

"Thanks for your—" the boy began.

The words froze in his gaping mouth. His face paled and his eyes grew wide at some unforeseen terror. He pointed a shaking finger somewhere behind Benedikt, whose pulse raced at the fear written over the boy's face.

Benedikt gave Grielle a sideways glance and saw her brows pushed together in concern. Slowly, making as little movement as possible, he turned to the stable door that led back outside and lifted the lantern to get a better view of whatever had stricken the boy silent. The lantern's light didn't travel far, but it did reflect in a pair of eyes that watched them from the archway.