"Adeline."

A hand brushes against my temple making me open my heavy lidded eyes. I stare up at James, knowing it had to be my best friend.

I smile sleepily, "Hey." I said, grumpily.

"How are you feeling Addie, because you look like hell." He laughed halfheartedly, he jokes but I know he sees everything. The dark bags underneath my dark lashes, the red-rimmed, and bloodshot eyes from crying.

I stick out my tongue, "Shut up, it's not so bad right now, not like last night." Or this morning.

His eyebrows fury, "You never really explained, what is it that hurts?"

I shake my head, sighing as I lay my head back to stare at the popcorn ceiling, "That's the thing James nothing physically hurts, it's just this dull ache like if you have the flu but only having one of the symptoms."

"I'm not following here Addie." He said, still obviously confused.

"Just that feeling you know when you get sick you just feel off, there's no other way I can describe it." I don't tell him that it feels like someone stuck their hand in my chest and is squeezing my heart and lungs until I can't breathe.

"You ever think maybe its depression." He cringes at his own words, knowing I wouldn't like what he had to say.

I laughed, "Seriously."

He looks away from me, "You have to consider it, with what happened with your mom and your sister being gone for so long, it can happen."

I fold my arms defiantly, "It's not because of that, I haven't mentioned her in so long and Izzy is visiting, she's coming back today." I make him look at me, "It's not about that."

He stares at me for a little before speaking, "Then it's not that."

He was my best friend, I trusted him but he was wrong, it wasn't about my mom, I accepted her passing a long time ago. At least that's what I tell myself.

"Are you planning to go back to class? You did sort of sleep through the entire school day, you might as well go home Addie."

I shake my head, "No, I can make it through the rest of the school day," I check my phone for the time. "All that's left is Art anyway, my blow off class."

"Are you sure?" His big brown eyes stare down at me, as I lift myself up.

"Yeah I'll be fine." I dangle my legs over the edge, kind of worried about going back out there.

"Do you have a ride home today, I don't want you walking home alone." He grabs my arm, helping me off the bed.

I retrieve my purse from the white cabinet before turning to him, "Yeah my dad's picking me up." I said, lying too easily.

I don't need him worrying about me all the time, he had his family to worry about. His eldest sister was pregnant, she was due any day now and he needed to be home with her. I could handle walking home alone for one day, I do it all the time.

He doesn't seem to believe me, "Are you sure?"

I nod my head, "We should go, don't want to be late and plus you missed one of your classes already so I'll see you tomorrow."

I leave him, crossing the courtyard to art class before he can interrogate me. The dull ache clings to me like a leech, crossing along with me.

Art class consisted of me feeling guilty about lying to James and feeling like I was about to keel over.

I slip my hidden phone under my desk, checking the time for the hundredth time I've been here. I only had a minute till the bell rang.

I find my purse on the floor, placing it over my shoulder as I waited. My foot unconsciously taps against the floor, forming a rhythm. I had a little patience, a trait most likely received from my mother.

The loud sound of a bell echoes loudly in my ears as it rings through the large classroom. Before anyone gets up from their seats, I'm out the door, already making my way to the exit. Pushing past the mass of people, I head to the front blue gates, only to wait for the buses to leave before I actually begin to walk home. I didn't want James to see me and freak.

Kicking around dirt with my foot, I stood there lounging against the brick wall. It seemed like forever before the busses finally drove off. Silently cheering, I pushed off the wall. I wanted nothing more than to sleep right now but I still wasn't up for running or speed walking home, so I took slow paced steps towards the direction of my house.

James words haunt me as I slap my shoes against the pavement, depression. Everyone knows what it is but dreads the word, it basically comes out of nowhere and destroys your life. I know what depression is, I went through it when mom died. This, what I've been feeling isn't depression, I would know and I wouldn't have said anything if it was because there's nothing you can do about depression except figuring out yourself what triggers it.

This particular roller coaster ride has no trigger, it pops out of nowhere and steals your breath away. I could concentrate, and find it if I wanted to, that's the sick thing about it too, it's like it just sits there waiting for me to find it.

If that makes any sense, maybe after this they'll have to send me to a psych ward.

These emotions, sit there, like they are now, I wait for them slowly allowing the uneasy feeling reveal itself. After this, I have no control over what it does. My curiosity and wanting to know what it was is a price I have to pay as it wraps around my ribs, my lungs, and my heart. It touches everything, making me gasp out loud.

The sound of a passing car makes me turn my head to the side. I didn't want anyone passing by to notice the hot tears stream down my face as I cried. I should be used to it but nothing stops the tears, it's like a reflex.

Gosh, I didn't need this right now, graduation was three months away. Izzy was coming home after a year of being away and not to mention James and I had plans to have some sort of road trip. I didn't need to get sick or whatever the hell this was.

I was so focused and in my head, I didn't see the blue pickup truck. I didn't see it swivel out of control as its tires skidding loudly against the pavement unable to stop, an uncontrollable beast that came straight at me. Before I could scream or move out of its way, I was slammed into. The force of the speeding truck hit my frail body, tossing me in the air as if I weighed absolutely nothing.

My vision blurs as my eyes try to refocus, a loud ringing in my ear starts as the unpleasant sound of my bones breaking finally met its end. As I roll on the smooth sidewalk, a loud crack could be heard as my head makes contact with the cement floor. I struggle for air, my chest feeling tight as I fought for oxygen.

Everything began to burn, a fire erupts from underneath my skin ripping apart my body, limb from limb. A gurgling noise escapes my lips as I taste the warm blood pooling in my mouth. I cough up the blood to remove it from my lungs but the hot liquid only rains back down to cover my face.

I know I won't be able to move, I know no one will find me in time and I know the last thing I will see is this damn sky.

They say when you begin to die, your life flashes before your eyes, mine didn't, all I felt was regret. For not listening more, for not telling my dad I loved him as often as I should have, for not going with James when he asked me to go home with him.

A fit of coughing racks through my body, causing torturous pain to spread down to my hands and feet.

I felt scared, who wouldn't be when you realize you might actually die.

The burning suddenly stops, I felt cold like a sheen of ice began to coat my skin, blanketing me in its softness. I knew I was dying, the outer rim of my vision darkens, I could no longer smell the sharp rush of blood as it spills from my mouth or feel my legs or even my fingers. I didn't fight anymore, I just wanted to sleep, I was so tired.

My eyes close, this was all over, I thought, only out of nowhere an unbearable, seething pain took over my small frame ripping me apart, slowly driving me insane. I can hear my loud guttural screams, it sounded, unlike anything I've ever heard as I plead for it to stop.

I only felt the fire as I struggle to open my eyes again that's when I saw a face, the most handsome face, he seemed to be kneeling over me, the sun sat behind him casting his face in a light shadow.

He was speaking, I could see his full lips moving, his jaw muscles twitching as he furrowed his brows down at me with dark eyes. I could no longer keep my eyes open to watch him above me, I was exhausted.

"Oh, no you don't sweetheart, you're not going anywhere." He continued to speak, trying to make sense of his words, I concentrated on his voice only hearing a foreign language spilling from his lips.

My body began to convulse and tremble, my back arching instinctively. The sound of my broken bones sent shock waves through my brain telling me to stay still but I only wanted to escape the pain he was causing. The pain caused by his hands, by his voice that seemed to be growing louder, twisting my head to look up at him I saw nothing in his eyes but darkness.

He meets my blue eyes, capturing me as he throws his hands down onto my stomach, I cry out, feeling as though his hands have melted into my skin.

The last thing I hear are the small, quiet incantation that leaks from his mouth.

••••••••••••••

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-Ash

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