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♥ louisa ♥

MY EYES PRESSED shut as I heard the sound of a beep, a signal of the call with Gabriel ending. I'd told him. I'd told him that the police knew where he was and warned him to getaway. Whether he escaped in time or not was in his own hands.

The conversation was manic, crazy and disorientated much like our relationship.

Black strands of straightened hair fell onto my face as my head fell forward in the exhaustion of emotions. Dry tears stained my face. Beneath the bikini and swimsuit cover-up that I was wearing, my heart was palpitating at an insane pace, way behind my mind which had given up some time ago and had become still.

I was crouching on the floor of my large en-suite white bathroom, shaking as the events from today swept around in my mind. What started as a chilled pool party with my friends has spiralled downhill when my parents told me about my engagement with Logan. Once everybody had left, I phoned Logan as he told me to, leading to a conversation that left me shaking. Logan has given me a choice to warn Gabriel and risk him finding out about a year ago or let him get caught and feel submerged by guilt, knowing I got him in that position in the first place.

Twenty minutes later, I realised there was a third option that Logan didn't fucking think of. Warning him whilst also stopping him from finding out about a single thing. Right now, as I hugged myself on the floor I hoped that in the time it took me to phone him, he hadn't found anything useful. He couldn't have.

Within seconds, my head began spinning again. It felt as if the world was sucked in a tornado, blurry and whizzing whilst leaving me standing in the calm epicentre with nothing to do at apart from staring at the moving scenes. It was all coming back. My past demons were hunting me down. Hyperventilating, I threw up in the toilet beside me and broke into a cold sweat.

Lou, you're mentally and physically exhausted. Go to sleep. Sort this all out in the morning.

I gazed at my watch. 19:38.

I didn't need to tell myself twice. After slowly brushing my teeth and washing my face, I weakly limped to my bed whilst shaking my clothes and pulling on a silk nightdress. My eyelids heavily dragged over my eyes, plunging me into oblivion darkness that was somehow more comforting than my present.

•••

Six.

Seven.

Eight. Nine. Ten.

Eleven.

That would be the twelfth time my phone, on the bedside table, buzzed within a minute. I was too caught up in my thoughts to care. I'd been up for probably five minutes, my mind haunted by a familiar face.

From behind my peach curtain, daylight shone but I was busy transfixed on the face floating around in my mind.

I didn't care that I'd broken the law. It was more that I'd hurt her again.

I'd broken her trust. Again. I'd wounded her. Again. I was given two options and I didn't choose her. Again. I chose him over her. Again. I was irresponsible. Again.

Tears rolled down my cheeks as my wet eyelashes sparkled from the light emitted by my lamp. They clumped together into small sections, creating the impression of even darker, fuller and longer lashes than I already had. It was funny how something as ugly and torn inside as myself could create the illusion of beauty.

Beauty meant nothing if the mind was broken.

Mine was.

I clenched my fists around the duvet as I sobbed quietly. This had been my opportunity to do something for her and I hadn't. Guilt enshrouded me at the thought of not giving her the justice she deserved.

I forced myself to stand up and move away from the bed, knowing that I'd lose the willpower if I didn't do it immediately. My knees almost buckled in fatigue yet I managed to grab the bedside table for stability. The last time I'd eaten was noon yesterday and it was currently 11 am.

It seemed wrong for me to complain about my hunger when people had been through so much more because of me.

Because of me and my decisions. I clenched my fists as a strong emotion flooded through me. The word anger would be an understatement. I fucking hated myself.

Why did I do it? Why did I warn Gabriel about the police? It was a stupid decision. Damn stupid.

Was it because he was attractive? Had I allowed myself to be swayed by his looks again? Perhaps that was the reason I felt a strong urge to let him know that the police were after him and give him the chance to run away. Because he was a fucking Greek God who didn't deserve to go to jail. How twisted was that?

Was it the messy dark brown hair, stormy grey eyes and full kissable lips that had enticed me to save him? To break the law and her heart along with it. I gazed at my slender fingers in disgust. Could I not resist sexual attraction? Was I so weak that I felt as if a criminal should be protected simply because he was attractive? Was I that susceptible to desire and lust?

If the answer to those questions was yes, I hadn't changed much.

But that wasn't it.

The fact that I'd been trying to ignore was that no matter how much I wanted to ignore and shut away Gabriel, I couldn't. He was so deeply woven with my past and present that no matter how much I wanted to hurt him, I physically couldn't allow myself to. When given the choice by Logan, I chose to help Gabriel.

Against all logic and reason.

Maybe it was because deep down, I knew that I'd messed up his life enough. He didn't need to have a court case on his tail too.

My hands gripped at my head, tugging at my hair as I sunk on my white chair that faced the window. Fuck, I was confused, conflicted, torn, whatever you wanted to call it.

Another thought punctured my mind like an arrow breaking through the thin skin of a balloon, deflating it completely.

Worry.

The fact that I'd called Gabriel didn't mean he hadn't seen anything already. I shouldn't have wasted 20 minutes before calling him. I'd given him more time to snoop around in those files and if he'd seen anything from a year ago, I was screwed. Bloody screwed.

My reputation would be torn if Forteux Academy found out what I'd done that night and my chances of a successful life would be gone. They'd all think I was crazy.

"Wait," I murmured under my breath. "There would be no way of linking anything to me."

It was more of a plea than a statement.

Shaking my head in a weak attempt to clear my mind of any thoughts, I pressed my feet against my bedroom carpet walking towards my phone. Grabbing it, I glanced at my notifications. The latest one was from Logan. I cursed under my breath before groaning. I didn't want to deal with him. He'd probably found out that I saved Gabriel yesterday and wanted to taunt me, stress me out of the consequences or threaten me or something.

God, what if he was even more jealous of Gabriel than he already was. My decision had probably made him think I was in love with Gabriel when in actuality, that was far from the truth. His paranoia had probably worsened that Gabriel was going to replace him at Forteaux.

After deciding to ignore his messages until I was ready to read them, I made a note to myself to avoid Logan as much as possible this week until his anger subsided. It had taken long enough for these bruises to fade, I thought to myself as I walked to the bathroom again.

When my phone began vibrating in my hands, I almost dropped it in surprise. I'd already cracked the screen far too many times. It was really bad actually. I think I had an issue with being unable to hold my phone for five minutes without smacking it on concrete. I thankfully managed to grasp it in some awkward position between my middle and ring finger, yet a second later it continued its journey to the ceramic and very hard I'd like to point out bathroom floor.

I winced as a loud crack followed.

Picking it up, my face fell as I glanced at the long white line flowing through the centre of the new phone. My face fell even further when I saw the caller ID.

Gabriel Reid.

I knew exactly what he was going to ask. He wanted to know how I knew the police were onto him. He'd sent me 28 messages since yesterday.

To be completely honest, I didn't have a clue what had happened once I'd told him the police were on their way and I needed to know if I didn't want Logan to use this against me. For the time being, the plan was to avoid answering any of his questions.

Rubbing my forehead, I accepted the call once I'd taken a deep breath and composed myself. I had to put on a stronger persona than yesterday. Yesterday, I was a mess and today, I couldn't show him that again. He'd already seen me on the bus that day and he was going to ask more questions if I didn't put my guard back up. "Hello?"

"Hey. Darling," his voice came out as breathless and hoarse as if he hadn't slept all night. I could hear the stress and confusion radiation through his phone and into mine. "Can we talk?"

I bit my lip and pressed my hand against my forehead. "Talk? I'm a bit busy right now but I can call you back later," I lied effortlessly. "I know this is probably really confusing for you but-"

"No, I mean in person," he interrupted lifelessly. Gabriel sounded off. His attitude lacked the slightest bit of the humour that is usually carried and although I understood the circumstances, he sounded utterly crushed. "Can we meet up?"

Pausing, I sighed inaudibly knowing that I'd have to face him someday. At least I'd be able to find out if he had seen anything at the hospital and if he had managed to get out in time. "Yeah. How about two?" I asked, naming a local coffee shop.

"Yeah, that sounds good. Thanks." Although he was speaking to me, I could tell his mind was miles away on something else.

"No worries, I'll see you later then," I responded, wanting to end the conversation before he began asking questions that I didn't want to give him the answer to. Thankfully, he took the bait and soon ended the call.

Staring at the girl in the bathroom mirror, I nodded to myself, pulling my act together. I could do this. I was composed, calm and had my shit together. Two o'clock at Maitre Choux. The digital clock in the bathroom read 10:55.

That meant I had three hours to come up with a story. 

Have any of you ever broken your phone screen before? Touch wood, I haven't.
Louisa's mind is so damn complicated, isn't it?
Anyway, thank you so much for bringing The Price of Gold up to 3K reads! IT MEANS SO MUCH TO ME! Love you all!
KiwiAndKoalas x

♥ 𝐩𝐥𝐞𝐚𝐬𝐞 𝐯𝐨𝐭𝐞 𝐢𝐟 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐞𝐧𝐣𝐨𝐲𝐞𝐝 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐬 𝐜𝐡𝐚𝐩𝐭𝐞𝐫! ♥