I can't remember the last time I was this nervous.

Was it right before my first championship, when I knew I had to prove myself to the entire world to live up to my father's legacy? Was it before my first kiss with Tawny Daniels in the fifth grade?

No. Neither of those events had my palms sweating this profusely or my heart racing in my fucking chest like a damn hummingbird. This isn't even a date to Aria. She agreed out of convenience so that the boys and I would help her move, so why am I acting like I'm back in high school all over again?

Because you want this to be a date.

Of course, I want this to be a date. I've never wanted something more in my entire twenty-two years of existence. Aria Monroe is back in my grasp—a woman I thought I'd never get the privilege of seeing again, and now that she's in my life once more? Nothing is going to keep me away from her. Certainly not sweaty palms and a racing heart.

Releasing a massive sigh to settle my nerves, I go to open up the driver's side door until suddenly, Aria skips towards me down the driveway, opening up the passenger side of my Mercedes Benz before I have the time to open the door up for her. "You would bring the fanciest car you own," she drawls, sliding into the leather seat beside me.

She's not going to be pleased when she sees the Bugatti in my garage. A gift courtesy of my brother last year.

I try to say something, anything, but words die in my throat from the way she looks tonight. Her black, straightened hair is piled up into a bun on top of her head with two pieces down to frame her face. It reminds me of that night we went out in Arizona. The night her little outfit nearly pushed me over the fucking edge of no return.

Dressed in tight jeans and a chunky sweater, she looks comfy and cozy and absolutely perfect for the date I have planned for us, but I can't manage to tell her that. I'm stuck on the way her skin, velvety smooth and brown resembling the richest soil of the earth—the kind that can only grow the most exotic of flowers, glistens beneath the streetlights.

Aria is exquisite. She's the lightning strike before the rain, encompassing all the power and electricity before the sky opens and comes apart. In any room she enters, she captures the attention of everyone.

"You were supposed to let me open the door for you." It's the only thing I can think of to say because Aria is the type of woman who deserves to have every door she comes across opened for her. She shouldn't have to lift a finger.

"If this was a date," she corrects. "However, this is merely a hang-out session between two coworkers."

A laugh bursts out of me uncontrollably, and all those nerves I felt only minutes ago vanish instantly. For whatever reason, this woman has the ability to make me feel comfortable no matter the circumstance. Maybe that's why I reply, "Do coworkers stick their fingers knuckle deep into other coworkers?"

The shock that flashes across her face thrills me. But what thrills me more is when she gives me a devilish grin of her own and replies, "Didn't know you were into that, Holden. Kinky."

"Wouldn't you like to know?"

In seconds, the air between us thickens and swallows the tiny distance between us. My eyes dart to her glossed-up lips, like she prepared for me to kiss her again, but tonight isn't about getting into her pants. Do I intend on making her come all night long? Completely, but I meant what I said about doing things differently this time around. I'm taking her on a date first because Aria Monroe is the type of woman who deserves a date.

Pulling my attention away from her to start the engine, I break her lust-filled gaze and begin to back out of the driveway until she places her hand over mine on the gear shift, stopping me. "Wait, I forgot something," she blurts, unclipping her seatbelt. "I'll be right back."

I watch intently as she races up the driveway to her new townhome, disappears behind the door for less than a minute, and returns. She isn't fumbling with her keys, but her hand grips the door handle to turn it not once, but three times before she jogs back to the car. When she's back inside, she gives me a sheepish grin. "Sorry. Needed to get my lipgloss."

She's lying, and I only know this because I could make out the tube in the back pocket of her jeans when she ran back to the house. Did she think I wouldn't sneak a peek at her ass?

"It's fine," I tell her instead, not wanting to ruin the night.

But despite my best efforts, my tone is laced with concern.

***

"You're kidding."

When I put the car in park smack dab outside of the employee entrance to the hockey arena, I can practically feel her animosity.

"This is where you want our first date to be? Our place of work?"

I arch a brow. "For one, I thought this wasn't a date. And second, I didn't realize you wanted there to be more than one. However, I'll be more than pleased to take you on as many dates as you'd like, Aria. Shall this become a weekly thing?"

Attempting to hide her frustration, unable to save herself, she crosses her arms over her chest and rolls her eyes.

"Look," I explain, shutting the engine off. "You wanted a place where we wouldn't be recognized. The arena is the best choice for that. I normally rent the place out to have private sessions, so it's not going to look weird if we're both seen here tonight. We can say you were...photographing me for a magazine or something on the ice."

Plus, I didn't want to take her somewhere that would overwhelm her. Aria is scared to take the jump with us. I understand there's a no-fraternization policy, so I wanted to ease her into this idea of us dating. If I rented out a private restaurant or whisked her away to Paris for the night, she would have run for the hills. I know her.

"Do you trust me?" I ask.

Our eyes lock, and we linger for a few moments until she dips her chin. Not exactly a yes, but I'll take what I can get.

"Aria," I groan when she opens up the passenger side door. "Can you please let me be a gentleman for, I don't know, two seconds?"

"I can get my own door," she replies with a ghost of a smile. It spreads into a full-toothed grin when she sees the annoyance sprawled across my face. "Oh my god, fine. I'll let you be as gentlemanly as you wish for the rest of the night. Happy?"

"Thrilled."

***

Inside the arena, Aria stares at the bench with a tiny v formed between her brows. There are multiple brand-new pairs of skates lined up, all in different sizes. "I didn't know what size you were," I say. "Will any of these work?"

Sitting down on the bench, I grab my own skates out of the duffel bag I placed here before I left to pick her up, but she's still standing in front of the skates, dumbfounded. "You want us to go ice skating?"

I nod, loosening the laces on my skates. "Among other things, yes."

"Connor..." That familiar blush creeps into her cheeks. "I...I don't know how to ice skate."

I anticipated this after she confessed she'd never even watched a game of hockey before, so the news doesn't phase me. Instead, I pat the seat beside me, urging her to sit. "Luckily for you, I happen to know someone very talented at skating who can teach you."

She sits down next to me without another word and watches me finish tying my skates. When I'm done, she tells me she's an eight, so I grab the respective skates and slide to my knees before her, loosening the laces. It takes me longer than normal since they're a new pair of skates, but with a quick glimpse at her, the breath whooshes out of my lungs from the heat of her gaze.

I'm just trying to loosen her skates, why is she—

Oh.

A devilish grin tugs on my lips. "Do you like it when I'm on my knees for you, Aria?"

The woman can lie all she wants, but I know we have a connection. It'd be impossible not to feel it. Whenever we're in the same vicinity, we're drawn together like two magnets—an undeniable force of attraction capable of rattling Earth itself.

And right now, it's hard for me to separate my unwavering lust and the knowledge that this is supposed to be a date first. Sex needs to come after, not before.

But the only thing on my mind is spreading these delicious thighs nice and wide for me, her head falling back to rest on the brick wall behind her as I engulf myself in her wetness. I would die a happy man in her ocean.

Aria isn't another girl to me, though. My past has been filled with women who only wanted to use me for fame or my looks. I'd take a woman out for a night on the town, and we'd last at a bar for about an hour before she wanted to hop in my bed, and for a while, I was content with that.

But Aria...

The night in The Maldives, our time together didn't feel like a one-night stand. It felt like I had known her for years. Our banter beforehand, how she knocked me down a few notches from the ego I had already accumulated as the state championship winner my senior year of high school... When I woke up alone in that bed the following morning, I wished she had stayed, and that's more than I can say for any of the other women I've slept with. Not that there was anything wrong with them, but I appreciate a woman with high standards. It made me want to be better for Aria, because I had a feeling our souls would find each other again, and I was right.

She deserves a date that doesn't result in me acting like a total neanderthal right off the bat.

Aria's chest is moving at rapid speed as she waits with nothing but anticipation at what I'll do next. A flicker of disappointment and relief seems to hint in her eyes when I drop our stare and finish loosening the laces of her skates, helping her into them. I refuse to make eye contact with her until I'm back on my feet again, trying but failing to hide my grin when she clasps my forearms for dear life from wobbling in her skates.

"I'm starting to think you did this on purpose," she mutters.

Did I?

Keeping the grin plastered on my face, I help her walk over to the ice, allowing her to keep her grasp on my forearms to steady herself. I'm wearing a grey cashmere sweater that zips up at the neck along with a pair of jeans because the ice can get cold, but right now, the fucking heat from her hands on any part of my body is enough to make me start sweating.

Keep it together, Holden.

I step onto the ice backward like it's a natural habit with my arms extended. Aria stiffens while she eyes the ice with reluctance, and it doesn't seem like much, but sometimes, I forget how skating can be daunting to others. I was practically raised on the ice. I knew the second my skate touched it that it was what I wanted to do. To go back to the basics and teach someone else is...nice—a reminder of why I started playing in the first place.

"Do you trust me?" Maybe I ask her again because she never told me yes, but I want to hear her verbally say it more than anything.

After another minute of contemplating, she says, "Yes."

The rush of adrenaline in my chest should be alarming, but I welcome it fully, realizing that earning her trust gives me greater satisfaction than winning a state championship in high school ever could.

Carefully, she steps on the ice, her legs shaking as she tries to keep herself upright. Aria is dainty, so she weighs practically nothing in my arms. It's not a challenge whatsoever to bear her weight.

We do a slow bunny loop to start, Aria's gaze locked entirely on her skates, fearful of falling while I enjoy every ounce of her touch that I can. Finally, after about two minutes of large, careful circles, a smile tugs on her lips.

"You make it seem so easy," she says, lifting her eyes to mine.

"Well, to be fair, I have been skating since I was eleven, so... You're doing good for your first time."

"I haven't moved my feet at all," she deadpans.

"Because you don't want to fall. If I let you go by yourself, you're going to. All beginners do. And I know you don't want to get your jeans wet."

Her lips twitch, threatening a smile. "Maybe they already are."

This woman...

Inhaling deeply through my nose from our close proximity, I tease her with a challenging glare rather than shove her against the side of the ice rink and fuck her senseless. "Are you saying you want to try and skate by yourself?"

"Might as well. I'm already on the ice, aren't I?"

I don't have a reasonable response to that, so instead, I cautiously release her hands, ensuring I'm within arm's reach if she needs me. Aria stares down at her skates when she tries to move, but her knees buckle. I reach out before she can fall, attempting to hide my smile. "Staring at your skates is only going to make you lose your balance," I explain. "You want to look ahead while you skate. Not down."

She nods.

"Knees bent a little," I say, analyzing her posture. "Yeah. Just like that."

"Now is not the time to be praising me," she warns.

A flicker of amusement dances in my expression. "But you're doing so well."

With a roll of her eyes, she shuffles towards me on the ice, barely keeping her balance, but somehow, she manages a few feet forward without falling. I skate backward, nodding in approval, when suddenly, her skate flies out from under her, sending her crashing to the ice right on her ass.

Falling on the ice is common, and I warned her about it, but it still doesn't help my racing heart when she winces, propping herself up on her elbows. I'm frozen in front of her while I hold my breath, praying to any God who will listen that I didn't just fuck this up between us.

Maybe I should have said fuck it and whisked her to Paris.

But then, a deity seems to answer because she throws her head back and laughs.

It's not any laugh I've heard from her before. This one is free of any of the demons holding her down. It's deep, carefree, and completely and utterly intoxicating.

"I suck at this," she says, taking my hand and allowing me to help her back up. Rather than let her attempt to kill herself again, I haul her into my arms and begin to skate around the rink, loving the way the breeze moves those strands of hair beside her face.

"You're just learning," I say. "You have to get used to it."

Spinning us in circles, Aria does that laugh again that has my chest expanding two sizes too big, but even with the expansion, the amount of happiness still seems to overflow it. I can't contain the smile that falls onto my face at the sound.

"You're so good at this." She's breathless as I hold her against my chest, and when she runs her damn fingers through my curls, it's an effort not to groan from the feeling.

"I...I would hope so," I reply, definitely distracted. "I play professionally, after all."

"Yeah," she admits, "but not like...this. You're different on the ice now than you are at practice or games. You're..." Staring into my eyes, she seems to be able to read me better than most. That connection between us flares to life, and my eyes instinctively dart to her lips. "You seem weightless," she finishes.

I start doing lazy figure 8's, keeping the smile plastered on my face. "That's an accurate assumption. When I'm on the ice and not having to practice or have the pressure on my shoulders to win games, I remember why I fell in love with skating in the first place. Being on the ice is freeing when I don't have to impress people."

She arches a brow. "You feel like you have to impress people?"

"Don't I? My father was a legacy in football. Growing up, pressure was placed on my brother and me from the media to follow in his footsteps with whatever sport we chose. My brother despised it, and despite my father's refusal, I know it bothered him that Everett didn't take up a sport. It may have been a weight placed on my shoulders solely by me, but it felt like I needed to love a sport and be the best at it for him. There wasn't an option."

"Connor..."

Swallowing past the lump in my throat, I shrug as if it isn't a big deal. As if Aria isn't the first person I've confided this information in. "I tried a bunch of different sports. Baseball, football, soccer, but when I found hockey... Hockey felt like the first sport I actually enjoyed, and of course, it helped I was good at it, but now that I'm playing professionally I feel like there's this unspoken expectation for me to be the best. It can be stressful."

I skate us over to the edge of the rink, placing her ass on top of it so I can stand between her legs. "It's a lot," I explain when she continues to remain silent. "Sorry. I didn't mean for the conversation to grow so dark."

"No." She shakes her head, smiling softly. "You didn't say anything wrong. I'm just... I can relate to you is all. Being the photographer for this team is a huge deal. I'm the first woman of color to have this job, and I take it seriously. There's also an unspoken expectation of me to be the best. Maybe I placed it upon myself, but it's there nonetheless. I don't want to let anyone down."

Suddenly, Aria's reluctance to step into a relationship with me becomes a lot clearer. I don't blame her for being weary, especially since this job means so much to her.

"Well, I think you're doing a damn good job. So does the team." I tuck one of those strands of hair behind her ear, letting my hand linger on her cheek. "And while I'll never understand how much weight that expectation holds, I can promise you to be here as a soundboard for you if you ever need to talk about it. I'll always listen and try to understand, even though I'll never be able to know what it's like to be in your shoes."

She leans into my touch, allowing me to caress her cheek with my thumb. "Thank you. And, for the record, you're a fantastic hockey player. I'm not really qualified to say since I'm still trying to learn the rules and everything, but I think you're exceeding everyone's expectations. Not that you need to. You should play because you love the sport, not for anyone else's approval."

Lifting her chin to meet my eyes, I stroke her cheek again and ask, "And how about with us? How well am I doing in that department?"

"I think..." She eyes my lips, an unwavering hunger entering her eyes. "I think you're passing with flying colors, Holden."

Enough to make this official between us?

The question is on the tip of my tongue, but I swallow it down in fear of scaring her off. Right now, as I'm holding her close against the edge of the rink, seconds from kissing her, it has to be enough.

"Enough to kiss you?" I ask instead.

With a slight dip of her chin, she brings my lips to hers, and just like our first kiss, it feels like goddamn sparks erupt everywhere. My body ignites in flames when my lips meld with hers, and when she opens to allow me access, my tongue darts inside, exploring every ounce of her.

When we slept together the first time, I didn't cherish it enough.

I won't make that same mistake again.

My fingers run through her hair as she tilts her head to the side, begging me for more. "We... Cameras," she finally gasps. "This will be all over the tapes, Connor."

"It's a good thing I know someone in IT then, huh? The cameras aren't rolling tonight, sweetheart, and our date isn't over yet."

The moan of relief sends a shock up my spine, a low growl of frustration ripping out of me at the fabric between us. I've never wanted to bury myself inside of someone more. Fingering her last night wasn't nearly enough. As soon as I returned home, I took the coldest shower I could and I still couldn't manage to get the feeling of her out of my mind.

I nearly slip when she rakes her fingers beneath my sweater, brushing right above the hemline of my jeans. Aria is a tease in the best way, and I plan on worshipping this woman into the early hours of the morning.

But first, the date.

We just have to finish this fucking date.

"There's another part to tonight," I pant against her lips. From how swollen and wet they are, I almost cave, but I can't. I won't. She deserves a true date. Just ice skating isn't going to cut it. "Can I show you?"

"That depends," she replies. "Does the second part involve your head between my thighs?"

Jesus Christ.

"The second part, no. However, the third part involves that and much, much more."

Her lips tilt up higher. "Oh yeah?"

"Uh-huh. As soon as this date is over, I plan on taking you back to my place and giving you the second best night of your life, Aria Monroe."

Author's Note:

CONNOR MAKES ME MELT.  OMG.

I LOVE HIM SO MUCH.

What did you guys think?

I updated today instead of tomorrow because I'm having dental work done and might be out of it for a few hours lol.

I hope you enjoyed the long chapter!

Twitter: believeeexoxo

Instagram: deannafaison_

Tiktok: authordeannafaison