Dave just couldn't believe it. He couldn't. He could not for the life of him wrap his head around what was currently happening.

Dave Strider was currently sleeping, or at least trying to sleep, in his bed with Karkat. Karkat, who had his back pressed against his chest and was snoring softly. Dave was grinning like an idiot. This was happening. This was actually happening.

Dave snaked an arm around Karkat's waist and gently tugged him closer. The troll didn't stir from his slumber. He slept on, shifting to get comfortable again. Dave laughed quietly and breathlessly. This was amazing. He didn't know what he did that changed Karkat so suddenly and so drastically. Dave's little rant in the car earlier was just him spewing out the feelings he'd been holding in for so long. He didn't know talking would actually fix things!

Dave reached his free arm up and brushed some hair off of the sleeping troll's face. This was just so...great. This was everything Dave wanted. Karkat to be comfortable again. Karkat to be happy and actually be himself again. The human closed his eyes, the smile still plastered on his face. That night he fell asleep happy and with brand new hope for his future and his future with Karkat.

~

Several weeks later, nearly a month, and things with Karkat were only improving. Ever since that night in the car he'd just been feeling so...refreshed? No. That wasn't right. It was like he had just stepped out the shower, he washed away the old and vicious Karkat and was now his old self. It was almost as if his seven sweep old self had reemerged from his prison deep in Karkat's thinkpan and successfully kicked the ass of the troll who lived a life of misery. Things for him finally started to be looking up. Even his relationship with Dave was slowly being repaired.

Karkat understood Dave's feelings. He knew Dave liked-- loved-- him. He knew Dave was willing to wait as long as it took to get another chance with Karkat, he knew Dave was that determined. The troll however, was skeptical. Dave had just reconnected with him, how could be possibly expect to rekindle the red relationship he once had with Karkat? Karkat had no clue, but he was more or less sure the old matespritship between them would happen soon.

The two of them were closer than ever now. Karkat allowed Dave back in his own room and the two of them shared the bed during the night. The troll was doing it mainly because of that certain night's events, it felt appropriate. They had a heart-to-heart and Karkat didn't want to feel guilty because Dave had just metaphorically spilled his guts to Karkat and in turn Karkat would just dump him in the living room.

Okay so it was more what Karkat thought would look bad. So what? It wasn't a bad idea. That night he slept peacefully, he didn't even remember having a dream that night. The extra warmth of Dave's human body comforted him. It was nice and he had to admit, he kind of missed it. When he was out in the day, sitting outside her Imperial Radiance's tent he would sometimes daydream of his days on the meteor with Dave. He smile and remember falling asleep in Dave's arms on the couch as they watched yet another shitty movie. Then Karkat would remember what Dave was (or what that scum sucking purple blood wanted Karkat to think Dave was) and he'd shake the thought out of his head, returning his full attention to standing guard. God, that all seemed so long ago.

Karkat was; however; still thoroughly confused about his feelings for Dave. A part of him still saw Dave as the horrifying ally of his enemies who just loved to torture and kill him in every way possible, but another part saw him as a sweet young man who was probably a bit too determined to do tasks that seemed nearly impossible. A nagging voice in his mind informed him that Karkat wasn't confused on Dave, but himself, but that was an internal struggle he'd rather face another day. For now he was happy hugging Dave goodbye when he left for work and falling asleep next to him at night.

~

Karkat sighed. He was sitting in front of the closet door with a few boxes around him. He was left alone for the day yet again but he didn't mind. He had wanted this, mainly because he had certain plans for the day that might've required Dave to be gone. He dug around in a box until he finally found the item he was looking for; a ratty dog-eared leather book with a yellow Gemini sign embedded on the cover. Karkat smiled sadly and opened up the the diary of The Architect. Something the psiioniic troll had treasured dearly and wrote in it daily. All of his feelings were written down here. It was like Karkat was holding a part of Sollux, a secret part only shared with him. It was nice.

Seeing the Alternian letters written in the comforting chicken scrawl of his deceased matesprit again made him feel calm. He had been a bit panicky recently what with the new Dave development but this would help him, he just knew it would. The troll eased back against the wall and began reading.

"My moirail suggested I write my daily thoughts and feelings and whatnot in this stupid little book so I would have something to calm me down if she is ever busy. I told her this was the stupidest idea I've ever heard of but I'm doing it anyway, for her." Karkat frowned. The Architect's moirail wasn't exactly his moirail at the time. It sort of hurt reading this. "I don't really have much to say today. It's been a fairly dull day. No moron has accidentally killed himself today while helping me construct my newest architectural masterpiece so there went me laugh of the day. However, there was a certain someone I bumped into. Her Imperial Radiance's newest bodyguard. I have to say, he isn't much of a bodyguard type. He's short and doesn't seem muscular at all. I honestly expected The Warlorde to choose someone far more suitable for the job. He's always going on and on about how his beloved deserves the best. I will say this about the alleged 'Peacekeeper' though, he has an intimidating look in his eyes. I cannot tell if it's the rich red color of them or if it is from first hand experience in battle. I'm sort of hoping it's merely color, because if it is then it must've been a hell of a battle to get him looking so dreadful and hopeless. He looks as if he had to firsthand witness the gruesome murder of his loved ones."

"It's funny," Karkat jumped and looked to his left, sitting besides him was Sollux- his Sollux, "I started up that shitty diary the first day I met you. It also happens to end the last day I'm alive. I like to think of that as a depressing little way of the universe saying my life metaphorically started when I first met you." Sollux smiled softly and reached over to the shocked Knight he used to call his own."I've missed you, Peacekeeper."

Karkat gulped and looked down at Sollux's ghostly hand which was resting on top of his own. He didn't know what to say or do. He didn't know if this Sollux was meant to be a good memory or a corrupted one that blamed Karkat for everything.

"Aren't you going to say anything Karkat?" The Psiioniic troll raised an eyebrow. "I haven't seen your face in perigees and now that I am, you're dead silent. Other times you can't stop talking my ear off." Karkat gulped and shook his head. He wasn't going to risk going back to the way he was. He didn't want to stay shut in the room all alone. He wanted to stay with Dave and be happy.

"I'm not falling for this, I just got myself better..." The red blooded troll murmured, looking down to the book in his lap.

"Falling for what? It's just me. I promise you, I'm not one of The Persuader's shitty mental holograms. It's me, Sollux."

"I don't believe you." Sollux sighed and pulled his hand away from Karkat.

"I understand. That bitch poisoned your mind. You can't even trust your own matesprit anymore. It's a sad world we live in Karkat." Karkat grunted in response and kept his gaze down. "Well...it's more a sad world you live in..." The troll glanced over to Sollux. "In my perspective at least...you have to live in a world where you have to see my face all the time and the face of your moirail almost always. I would never be able to live in such a world."

"Yeah well I'm not you now am I?" Sollux chuckled.

"No, you're not. You're a lot tougher than I." Karkat messed with his finger nails, biting his lip. Everything was silent for a moment before Karkat spoke.

"...It hurts seeing your face and knowing it isn't you. It hurts so bad I can't do anything about it." The Gemini troll returned his hand to its spot on top of Karkat's, rubbing his hand with his thumb. "I miss you more everyday... but I'm getting help. I'm getting better. Things are a lot better for me now."

"I'm glad to hear that Peacekeeper..." The Gemini scooted closer to his matesprit and placed a hand under his chin, moving his head so they were facing one another. "But you know...there is always a way to make things better."

"What...? What do you mean...?"

"You can always...come back home. Come back to me." Sollux smiled softly. "There is a possibility. You have an Equius here in this strange world, he can help you..."

"Help me with what? What the fuck are you talking about?"

"Remember...long ago, when we all just barely established our quadrants you told us of this strange land and your friends...your moirail being the genius he was built you a machine, a wonderful one meant to take you home...the machine never worked. But perhaps it will here. Perhaps your Equius is more suited for the job." Karkat's mouth was dry. Sollux was right. Karkat had constantly prattled on to The Marksman about his old home, enough to the point where the blue blood decided to build a machine to help him go back. It was a nice thought and an amazing gesture but the machine never worked.

But what if it can work now? He has a point. Modern technology can make it work.

No. no he wasn't going to think about it. He wasn't going to entertain the idea of going back. He was better now. He had Dave. He had Dirk. He had Kanaya and Rose and all his friends. He didn't need to go back.

Just to see them again. Just once more. One more time, to say goodbye.

Karkat bit his lip. It was starting to sound like a good idea. And maybe saying goodbye would help him. Yeah. Besides, he'd only be there for a couple of minutes. Nothing would happen. Nothing at all.

Convinced, Karkat began digging through the boxes again. Instead of a diary, this time he was looking for an old work journal filled with sketches upon sketches of new weapons and machines. Karkat was going home.

~

Upon arriving home that same night Dave could already feel something was off. The atmosphere was just...wrong. He slid his jacket off, throwing it on the couch and walked slowly to his room.

"Karkat? You in there dude? I just home from work...thought maybe we can watch moms put their kids in pageants and get too competitive over it..." Dave poked his head into the room, finding Karkat on the floor surrounded by his old things. He was just staring at the wall in front of him, clutching a book in his hand with a look of pure concentration on his face. "Karkat? Snap out of it." Dave kneeled down besides the other and reluctantly rested his hand on top of his shoulder. "Dude...?" Then, as if by magic, Karkat yanked himself out of his deep train of thought. Looking over at Dave he blinked in slight confusion.

"Oh, sorry Dave. I was just...thinking." Karkat glanced down at the book in his hands and so did Dave. He frowned slightly upon seeing the Gemini symbol embossed on the cover.

"You miss him that bad?" Karkat nodded, keeping it at that. He wasn't about to go spewing out his entire encounter with the apparent ghost of his dead matesprit. "Hey, remember I'm always just a click of the crab away dude. It doesn't matter what time you need me, I'll answer. That's why we dug out these monstrosities remember?" The troll nodded stiffly and let Dave hug him tightly.

That night was filled with Dave trying to comfort Karkat on something he didn't need to be comforted on. When they went to bed that night Dave held him tightly and whispered sweet, comforting things into his ear. Karkat was at ease and happy here. Which only only made him feel even more guilty about what he was going to do.