(Y/n): Ah I got gunpowder all over my sleeve...

???: I don't even know how you managed that.

The day after the graduation, you and the cadets had been assigned to a garrison. You were really just there to do the chores the garrison didn't want to do but don't let anyone tell them that. The rose backs would get all upset of course and then go on some spiel about guarding the walls and blah blah blah.

???: You enlisted in the Recon Corps?! Connie!

You lifted your gaze away from the filthy cannon you had been assigned to polish to find at the next cannon over Eren was speaking to what looked like Connie. finding this a simple enough reason to stop doing chores, you and the other cadet walked over.

Conny: This is my own decision!

Conny looked back at Eren and you could tell he was embarrassed. You didn't mind though as you did kind of pull him away from his dreams of the military police, a pang of slight guilt still in your chest. In your pride fueled episode you pulled your precious friends into joining the Recon Corps. You wanted to make sure they were safe and the scouts were kind of the opposite of that.

???: Um guys?

Your gaze was brought back up to find Sasha, and from her hunched over position you could just smell the reprimanding you guys would get.

Sasha: I borrowed some meat from the Officer's morning rations.

Sasha pulled out a nice looking slab of maybe pork or ham and you felt your heart drop along with the rest of the cadets in your section of the wall. You slide your hand down your face, remembering that Sasha was kind of an idiot when it came to food. It didn't help that she had a weird look accompanying talking about meat... she shuddered, drool coming from her mouth as you approached her.

Eren: You have to bring it back!

???: Meat is a rare luxury now that we've lost so much land.

Sasha: Don't worry about it-

The girl spoke moving forward, hiding the meat in a crate.

Sasha: Once we retake the land, we can keep pigs and cows again.

The area filled with silence. It was the overall sight of meat that seemed to break the tension. Its appeal simply overwhelming your weak spirits.

(Y/n): W-Well... Ah! Look if you give me some of the meat I'll cook it!

???: I want some of the meat too!

Conny: If ((Y/n) is cooking it then I really want some!

As your little group planned the heist of a century, you felt your jacket get tugged from behind.

???: If we don't get back to the cannon then we won't get any of it, Chef (L/n).

The young cadet tugged you along as you awkwardly walked backward. Sasha looked over her shoulder and waved at you before continuing back to her section. You smiled softly, letting your hand raise to push the loose strands of (H/c) hair out of your eyes, clicking your hair back with the light sweat that had built working in the bright sun on top of Wall Rose. You were just ready to hang out with everyone and get some lunch/ with the way your stomach growled you knew it-

If you thought your heart stopped when Sasha acted like her foolish self, the next thing that happened caused your heart to drop from your chest and roll off the wall. Your body wouldn't even let your lift up your gaze, a massive thing suddenly appearing to your left side. Your eyes widened to the size of saucers as you hastily spoke in a whisper.

(Y/n): H-Hey...

The cadet behind you didn't respond, probably frozen in fear. Where you scared? You didn't really know what it was but it clearly wasn't anything good. The next thing you knew was a massive wave of air hit you, nearly losing your footing as you finally gulped down your fear and looked to the side in time to see... it... t-that... that's the colossal... the titan that destroyed the outer wall of Maria... you had heard the stories but...

???: Ahhhh!

It was then you noticed that the fingers brushing your neck were gone. You shifted your gaze, looking behind you to find the cadet at the wall's edge, about to fall into the city below. She must have not been ready for the gust of air. The screams of your friends alerted you to something else. Your perception felt drunk at the moment, so many events and information flooding your brain as you looked over your shoulder to find another massive wall of air blowing across the top of the wall. Y-You... you needed to jump! It was then your muscles seemed to move before you could order them. You raced at the female cadet, her horrified gaze looking you in the eyes as you charged at her. You tackled her softly in a sense, pushing her off the wall as you followed, wrapping your right arm around her awkwardly around her shoulders while your left hand fumbled with the left grip of your ODM. As you fell from the wall, her ear bleeding scream filled your right ear, a ringing filling them as you took hold of the grip and fired a grappling hook into the wall stabilizing your fall before your feet hit the wall, holding you in place. It was then you slide your right hand down from the cadet, her trembling form fumbling around your chest for a better grip so she didn't fall.

(Y/n): Stop. Stop. STOP!

You barked at her, managing to hold her in place long enough to grasp your other grip to fire a hook into the wall to at least hold your weight and hers for now. You let out a breath you didn't know you had been holding. the girl desperately clinging to you let out a whimper, the near trauma of falling to her death coupled with seeing that massive thing seemed to have frozen her in place, any sudden movement causing her to cling to you tighter.

(Y/n): Are you alright? Can you move?

???: I... yeah.

Good at least she was responsive.

(Y/n): You're tough. Always kinda liked that in a girl.

???: I swear if you try and flirt with me right now, I'm detaching these wires and send us both down.

(Y/n): Hey I'm just saying what's on my mind, trying to break the tension.

???: Yeah nothing like- O-Oh no...

(Y/n): I can't exactly move all that well... did he...

You felt a nod against your shoulder and felt your throat shut. The gate... the gate was destroyed just like five years ago. Unlike last time though, you were getting a nice first-person experience with it.

Eren: Four groups! Ready the artillery!

A voice called out belonging to Eren

Eren: Prepare for battle! the target is right before us, the Colossal titan!

That freaking idiot! Even if he could take it down there was the concern of the titans that were going to flood in through the broken gate. But... there's no way to patch that damn wall before the titans arrive. The cadet in your embrace finally found the strength in her to push off from you, deploying her own ODM gear. What surprised you the most was the fact she followed after Eren.

(Y/n): H-Hold on! You'll die if you go up there!

She didn't respond to you as she continued moving. You wanted to follow after her but found your legs frozen in place. No no no no no! What the hell happened to joining the Scouts, huh? Going out and dying for yourself rather than your Father. Your teeth grit as the angry voice you recognized as your own filled your head. Damnit...

(Y/n) D-Damnit... Damnit!

You howled out, running up the wall and jumping off, turning your hips to fire the rappels again to hoist yourself up.

That fleeting moment of death defying glory did feel nice in the end. Once you made it to the top the Colossal titan was long gone and the advance team of the garrison had arrived to relieve you and the other cadets. You were to report to the HQ to learn your new positions in the operation to stem the flood of titans into this city long enough for someone somehow to come up with a way to repair the wall. This city... so many people could die if you don't do this right. they didn't deserve this at all and yet fate decided to play grim reaper today.

???: Trost was supposed to be an easy post... why would the colossal be here...

???: It doesn't matter! Get your gear on and get into position!

???: Let's move! the titans aren't gonna wait for you to get your sorry asses into gear!

You did your best to steady the adrenaline flooding your veins, you would need that for later. You restocked on your gear, filling up on tanks and making sure you had sharpened blades before reporting in the courtyard with the rest of the cadets.

R-Really... they... they want to send the cadets into combat? Sure we have training but that's like... gah you didn't even know what it was like but... You gulped softly, listening to the ranking solider from the Garrison bark out his orders for the cadets, explaining the vanguard, cadet forces, and the elite Garrison forces.

???: Also, messengers report that the Advance squad was wiped out!

Your eyes widened even more. The advanced squad was...wiped out? Haha! this guy sure knows how to raise morale, doesn't he?! Everyone needed to fight, you knew that, but were the cadets really suited to this? If you kids were the best humanity had to offer at the moment... doesn't that say something?

???: Also, as you all are surely aware, desertion in the face of the enemy is punishable by death! Mark these words well and fight till your last dying breath! Dismissed!

Then the chaos began. Cadets and Garrison scrambled to get to their assigned squads, looking for their squadmates or ranking officers to follow. You gulped softly and looked through the crowd for your friends. You... you needed to see them... before all this went down. you managed to find someone in the crowd and spotted Sasha. Her eyes caught yours and she waved out at you before your shoulder was jerked.

???: Come on we haven't got all day! We need to get to the position now!

Another cadet pulled you along, your squad seemingly found as you reached out for Sasha. Conny and Sasha needed to pull through this. they were strong, stronger than you at least. all you had to do was keep breathing long enough to get back to them through this mess. As you pulled away you bumped into a shorter girl. You hastily yanked your arm away and offered your hand to her. Christa Lenz, one of the top 10 of your class. you had seen her a little bit here and there but her watchdog was always around her. she glanced up at you with her bright blue eyes. they kind of reminded you of a warmer version of Annie's. She took your hand and pulled herself up.

(Y/n): You alright?

Christa: Yeah, are you?

(Y/n): Don't worry about me, alright? Just keep yourself alive out there.

The other cadet cleared his throat and beckoned you to come on. you gulped a bit and nodded at Christa walking off. Of course, the girl needed to say something that made you feel a bit sad. you didn't even really know why.

Christa: P-Promise me the same thing! Stay alive out there ok?

You blinked a bit but didn't want to turn and look at her. You offered a thumbs up over your shoulder as the cadet and you began to jog. It always felt weird when people seemed to care about your wellbeing. It has been so long that you sort of forgot about it... As you met with the rest of your squad you didn't recognize any of them, save for one. It was the cadet from earlier. You raised your hand to grip her shoulder but the rest of your team fired off their hooks, flying off as you hastily followed.

(Y/n): Hey.

???: What?

(Y/n): I just wanted to say you were quite brave at the wall. You managed to rush forward while I was frozen in place.

???: I just... I wanted to get a good look t the monster that ruined our lives I suppose.

The two of you flew along with the rest of your squad. Your squad had been lovingly assigned the number 23, assigned to carry various supplies and kill any titans that may slip through the cracks of the vanguard.

(Y/n): I've already met the one who ruined my life, but I guess you deserve that right too.

The girl glanced at you and decided to not pry.

???: We could have died back there when you tackled me off the wall.

(Y/n): Eh, I wanted to save you at the very least.

???: Hold on you're saying you were ok with dying?

You let out a breath through your nose. Were you ok with dying? The girl didn't give you a chance to respond as she took your silence as an answer.

???: Pfft, how selfish can you get?

(Y/n): Excuse me?

???: so many of us have died and you're just ok throwing your life away for someone like me?

(Y/n): I don't care about dying as long as someone else can survive in my place-

???: and what if they die right after you? You have training that can make the difference! Instead of dying like a sack of meat, try to save yourself as well as that person. You said it earlier that you were frozen in place on the wall right?

(Y/n): Yeah...

???: then that means you were scared to die, just like the rest of us. So don't go telling stories like that anymore ok?

This random cadet had just destroyed your entire argument about death, leaving you with an empty feeling in your chest. Deep down, she was completely right, your training could not only save someone else but... just maybe you can save yourself too. You gulped softly, glancing at the girl for a second before speaking.

(Y/n): What's your name?

???: What?

Your squad bounced off a nearby roof to propel onto the next house, racing forward

(Y/n): Tell me your name.

The girl took a moment before turning to you. In all the chaos you hadn't really gotten to see her. She was astonishing really. Her vibrant green eyes shone with life, a will to live on and see the next day. Her features were perfectly shaded by her shoulder-length dark blonde hair. She opened her mouth and spoke with a smile.

Erika: My name is Erika-

Just like that, she was gone. One of those monsters had been waiting. He reached around the building and smacked his palm against the girl, snapping her cables and sending her flying back. From the sound of glass shattering, she seemingly hit a window or door. In almost slow motion, you glanced around. you should have been paying attention. your squad was gone, titans devouring the flesh of one pour soul while one was dragged away. the cadet that had dragged you off earlier was now in two pieces on a nearby roof, his torso being dropped into a titan's hungry maw while his legs were picked out by two smaller titans, pulling at the legs like some sick demented joke. You slowly looked down to fin another titan jumping up, a smaller one waving at you with his hands. Funny... this was your first time seeing titans and yet for some reason... you weren't scared. Maybe it was because you were just numb at the moment. The titan that had jumped at you managed to catch one of his hands on your wires, prying the left on out of the brick it had clasped to, sending you spiraling off course. You grit your teeth as you tried to memorize a new course, the words of Erika filling your mind as you tried to fight, if only so that she didn't die thinking wrongly of you. You didn't get to think for long as your face smacked into a window your body slamming into the window sill. Half of your body rested on the window, your hand lazily pressing into your mouth so you couldn't scream out bloody murder and attract more monsters from the large chunk of glass gutting your left side. You could feel a shard here and there in your face as well, a cool liquid starting to run down your left cheek and your forehead over your left eye. Another shard had landed next to your right eye, causing you to shut the eye, leaving yourself blind as you wiggle your body, hoping to break the glass. With a single breath, you bit into your hand and felt the glass pop, your body rolling inside the room as a slight rumbling began to pick up. One of them had seen you. Of course, you knew it would, with your luck. you lifted your hand and pulled the glass from your eyes, opening your eye to glance around the room in time to see a bookcase next to the window. So with as much strength as you could muster, you crawled a few steps before using the bookshelf to yank yourself up. Thanks to your weight the bookshelf lost balance and crashed into the other wall next to the window, laying on the wall at an angle just enough to cover the window. You slid down next to where the bookcase had been to take a break, opening your eyes. Of course... your freaking luck... You pressed your finger to your lips, signaling the young mother and her child to be quiet as the titan approached.

(Y/n): Stay quiet and we can... get out of here... I... need to see them again...