#TPTG37

"Meeting adjourned."

I got back to my senses when I heard the judge pounded his gavel. Tumayo ako at agad na nilapitan si mama.

"Mom, let's go," I said and held her arm. Tulala padin siya hanggang ngayon. I pulled her away from the chair.

"Walang hiya ka Cecelia! You murderer! How dare you kill my son?!" someone from the audience approached mom and pulled her hair

My jaw dropped. I immediately removed her hand from my mother. "Ma'am, that's enough!"

Hindi niya inalis ang paningin kay mama. She was glaring at her while gritting her teeth in anger. I only realized now that the woman in front of me is Archie's mother, and behind her are his other relatives.

"I'll make sure you'll rot in hell bitch! Hindi ko papalagpasin ang ginawa mo sa anak ko!" she barked. Hinila naman siya palayo ng asawa niya

I held my mother's arm and put her behind me. I took a step forward and faced the woman. "If you lay another finger on my mother, I swear to God, hindi mo magugustuhan ang gagawin ko," kalmado pero mariin kong sabi

She glared at me. Her eyes were wide open and intense, sharp as a knife. Her lips were quivering in anger. "Like mother like daughter I see. Magsama kayong mag-ina! You both didn't deserve to be part of the family! Ang dami naming naitulong sa inyo pero eto ang binalik niyo sa'min?! Wala kayong utang na loob!"

I didn't remove my eyes on her. My feet remained firm on the ground. I wanted to slap her in the face for hurting my mother but I don't want to cause a scene. Nangangati na ang mga daliri ko pero unti-unti ko nalang iyong kinuyom.

"Mark my words Cecelia, I will never ever forgive you for what you did to my son. Murderers like you don't deserve to live," she warned in a low voice while looking at the woman behind me

Nagpumiglas siya sa mga may hawak sa kanya at mabilis na lumabas ng korte. The other relatives followed, tinignan din nila kami ng masama. Lastly, the governor stared at me with both disappointment and hostility. He walked passed me and followed the rest.

I swallowed hard and remained unfazed. The people who I once called my family are now strangers to me...wala akong nakita sa mata nila kundi galit at paghihiganti. They treated us like we are their worst enemy! 

"Felicity!"

Napalingon ako sa tumawag sa'kin na si Christian. My eyes widened when I saw mom unconscious on his arms.

"Your mother. She fainted," alerto niyang sabi

Panandaliang tumigil ang puso ko. Agad ko silang dinaluhan.

"Mom!" I called and tried to wake her up

Thank goodness, Christian was there to support her.

I held her cheek and squeezed her hand. "Mom, it's me. Wake up! Please," I panicked. "Call the ambulance Christian!"

He quickly took his phone out of his pocket and dialed the number of the ambulance. He kept on glancing at us with a worried expression.

Hindi ko inalis ang paningin kay mama. I kept on calling her name but she wouldn't wake up. Nanlamig ang buong katawan ko habang nakatingin sa walang malay niyang mukha.

God, I hope nothing bad happened to her.

***

"Attorney!"

I slowly lifted my head and saw Nicholas on the hallway of the hospital. Naglakad siya patungo sa'kin hanggang sa naramdaman ko nalang siya sa tapat ko. He then slowly knelt down in front of me while searching for my eyes.

"What happened?" he asked worriedly

I gulped. "My mother...she fainted."

"Are you okay? Is she already awake?"

Umiling ako at yumuko.

"I'm sure she'll wake up soon. Huwag kang mag-alala..."

Hindi ako sumagot. Tulala lang akong nakatingin sa sahig. Ilang sandali ay napatayo ako nung biglang may lumabas na doctor sa kwarto.

"Doc...how is she? Is she awake?"

"She's fine. She fainted due to overfatigue and stress but you don't have to worry. Sa ngayon ay nagpapahinga pa siya," paliwanag ng doctor

"Can I...see her?" I asked carefully

"Of course."

Tumabi sa'kin si Nicholas. I felt his hand on my back. I looked at him with a worried expression. He gave me a nod, assuring me that everything is going to be alright.

Sabay kaming pumasok na dalawa sa loob. I immediately saw mom on yhe bed, sleeping peacefully. My heart broke upon seeing her in that kind of situation. I slowly walked towards her and sat beside the bed.

"How was the trial?"

"It ended a few hours ago...I honestly don't know if we can still win this," humina ang boses ko

My emotions has taken it's toll on me. I don't know how I can move forward in this situation. It's like I'm hanging on a thin and loose thread. Konti nalang ay bibigay na ako.

"Don't say that. Alam kong malalagpasan mo din ito. You're the strongest person I've ever met. Just hold on a little longer," he comforted

But those words aren't really enough to ease my pain. Wala na akong nararamdaman.

My eyes didn't leave my mother. "You know what's the hardest thing for me?"

Binalot kami ng katahimikan. Tahimik lang siya habang nakikinig sa'kin.

"Seeing my mother like this. I have so many regrets. If only I didn't leave her then none of this would have happened. Earlier on the trial, the whole family was there. Ang sakit sa pakiramdam kapag nakikita ko silang kinamumuhian kami...especially my mom. Ang sakit ng mga salitang binibitawan nila sa kanya. They kept on blaming her for everything. She didn't deserve it..."

I feel like my heart is being stabbed a thousand times whenever I heard them curse my mother to death. Ako kasi ay sanay na ako na mapagsalitaan ng masama. It doesn't affect me anymore that much unlike my mother. I know she's deeply hurt by their words.

My eyes started to water as tears began to threaten to fall from my eyes. Naramdaman ko ang kamay ni Nicholas sa likod ko. He caressed my back and consoled me. He stayed silent the whole time. 

I inhaled deeply and closed my eyes, praying that my mom will wake up soon.

***

"Ma...kain ka na po," sabi ko habang nakatapat ang kutsara sa bibig niya

She didn't move. Tulala lang siyang nakatingin sa kawalan.

I sighed. "Please mom. Kailangan niyong magpakalakas."

Unti-unti siyang tumingin sa'kin. She looked at the spoon in front of her. After a while, she slowly opened her mouth and ate the food.

I smiled weakly. "There you go."

It's been a few hours since she woke up. Hindi ko napansin na nakatulog pala ako sa tabi niya. Pagkagising ko ay wala na si Nicholas sa tabi ko...but I saw food on the table beside the hospital bed.

"Anak..."

I stopped mixing the food on the bowl when I heard her called me. The word anak pulled some strings on my heart. Parang pinipiga ang puso ko sa salitang iyon.

I forced a smile and looked at her. "Yes mom?"

I saw how her lips are pale and cracked. Her white hair started to get more noticeable. When I look into her eyes, I saw how tired they were.

"Hindi ka pa ba napapagod?"

I was caught off guard by her question. Umawang ang labi ko habang nakatingin sa kanya.

I gulped. "What do you mean mom?"

Umiwas siya ng tingin. "I'm sorry Fey...I'm so sorry. Alam kong hirap na hirap ka na dahil sa'kin. Alam kong naging pabigat ako sa'yo. I'm sorry if—"

Agad akong umiling. "No mom. I'm o-okay. Please don't give up yet. Sana ay lumaban ka din. Be strong, mom. We'll get through this, okay?"

Huminga siya ng malalim. "I'm trying Fey...pero kapag nakikita din kitang nahihirapan ay mas lalo akong nasasaktan. I'm your mother and I should be the one protecting you and not the other way around."

I held her hand. "H-hindi ako pagod ma, kung iyon ang iniisip mo. You were the one who raised me strong," biglang may nagbara sa lalamunan ko. I couldn't form the right words to say. My chest feels heavier and heavier. "And you're the strongest woman I've ever known in my entire life."

Our eyes didn't leave each other. Kita ko padin ang awa sa mga mata niya.

"We can't give up yet...kailangan mo pa akong dalhin kay papa," my voice broke

Her lips parted while staring at me.

Pinilit kong ngumiti. "After all of this, let's visit dad okay? P-promise me you'll take me to him. Promise me you'll fight until the end."

I tried my best not to cry in front of her. I have to make her strong, give her a reason to fight.

I swallowed hard. "I haven't seen my real father yet...and I want to him already so bad...so bad. Ipangako mo sa'kin na sabay tayong bibisita sa kanya."

Binalot kami ng katahimikan. I felt her hand on top of mine. She slowly nodded and gave me a small smile. "I promise." She held my cheek and wiped the tear from the corner of my eyes. I chuckled softly.

Eventhough, life gave me so much problems that make me give up but I always think of reasons to continue to fight even if I couldn't handle it anymore. At the end of the day, pinipili ko lagi na lumaban...and this why the reason I'm still here. I'm still alive. I don't care what life throws at me. I'm ready to face it.

"Atty. Cervantez. The court already announced the second hearing and it is scheduled a week from now," balita sa'kin ni Christian

I nodded. He visited my mother on the hospital today and brought lunch. Well, the good thing is that mom can rest more but the bad news is that may nakabantay na pulis sa labas ng kwarto niya. It's making me uncomfortable but I have no choice. Kaysa naman ay ilagay siya sa kulungan na gano'n ang kalagayan.

"They really are trying to make it seem like your mom intentionally killed him. They didn't care if it was self-defense because what they want is to appear it as 'murder'."

"I know. They're playing dirty, that's why. I expected it already...but their claims are not strong enough to convict my mother as a murderer."

I drank from the coffee that he gave to me. He sighed heavily and did the same. Napatingin kami sa T.V. ng ospital sa harap.

The news were about the funeral of Archie Fernandez. The camera went closer to his relatives. Nakita ko din ang governor doon.

"Wow, so they can provide a grand funeral service for him pero pagdating sa serbisyo sa mga Pilipino ay wala silang budget. Just great!" he commented

I saw on the T.V. that Archie's coffin is being carried by a bunch of policemen. Behind it are his families, nakita kong iyak sila ng iyak habang naglalakad.

I don't understand why did they have to air it on national television. Well, they surely have a budget when it comes to this.

Days went by and the second trial has finally started. 

I looked at my mother beside me. "Are you okay mom? May masakit ba sa'yo?"

Umiling siya. "I'm fine Fey."

I noticed that her wounds are slowly starting to heal but I can still see some...at iyon ay ang mga kagagawan ni Archie. I can't even imagine the amount of times he beat her up. Wala siyang puso. Ano'ng kalaban laban ni mama sa kanya?

"Calm down mom, we got this."

Huminga ako ng malalim at tumingin kay Christian sa tabi ko. We both nodded at each other. The door of the entrance suddenly opened and I saw Archie's relatives entered. Kanya-kanya silang upo sa pinakaharap. The prosecutors arrived too. I saw Keith, with his usual cold face. This time, he's wearing glasses.

"All rise for the presence of Honorable Dean Brillantes."

My heart is pounding wildly inside my chest, maslalo na nung tumingin sa'kin si Keith. He has no sympathy nor mercy on his eyes. I can feel like he really wants to beat me so bad. Parang ginusto niya talaga ito. He must have taken the case because he wants to me suffer! He clearly knows what's he's doing. Aside from the case, he too wanted to take revenge on me. I will never forgive him!

We're not fucking highschool students anymore Keith. Fuck you.

"Defense Attorney, you may now call in your first witness," Judge Brillantes ordered

I stood up and raised my chin. "May I request the family doctor of the Guevarra's. Dr. Alfred Tan."

Naglakad ako sa harap. He's already sitting on the exact same spot from the last trial.

"So my question is. How long have you been a doctor to the Guevarra family?"

"Bago lang po. About a year."

"And you said you've given my client, Ms. Cervantez, medical prescriptions. How can you say that she's depressed? You're his doctor afterall right? I'm sure she must have shared her reasons."

He swallowed hard. "Uhh naikwento niya nga sa'kin na nahihirapan na siyang...manatili sa mansion."

I arched my brow. "Can you elaborate further?"

He couldn't look at me in the eye. Nakita kong tumingin siya sa likod ko. It's like he's asking for help from the audience. I saw from the corner of my eyes that it was the governor's he's looking at. I stepped forward to block his view. Nagtama ang mata namin.

"That's all I c-can say, Attroney," he stuttered

"I'm sure there's a deeper reason behind it."

There is one thing that Keith missed or maybe he intentionally did not ask this question.

"You said that she's having a hard time staying at the mansion and what better reason could it be? She's being mistreated and abused by the people surrounding her, that explains her bruises. Who can they be?" I said and faced the audience. 

Sinadya kong tumingin sa governor. Magkasalubong ang kilay niya habang nakatitig sa'kin. Gano'n din ang ibang miyembro ng pamilya niya. Para bang kinukulam nila ako sa isip nila.

I shifted my gaze back to the doctor. "I believe that the wounds that my client has were certainly not her own doings. It's all bruises. Someone was hurting her and I have one or maybe two, in mind," I said. "Does Mr. Archie Fernandez visits the mansion?"

"Madalas ko nga siyang nakikita doon. Para bang...sariling bahay niya din," he nervously said

"And do you happen to see him and my client together sometimes?"

"Uh...hindi naman po."

I sighed. "Mr. Fernandez, as we all know, has his own criminal records. He has a history of violence. He is capable of killing someone and my client became one of his victims. She used self-defense to protect her. I rest my case, Your Honor."

I took a deep breath and went back to my seat. Nahuli ko sa gilid ng mata ko si Nicholas. He was part of the audience. Ngayon ko lang siya napansin. He's sitting at the last row, just all by himself watching me.

Atty. Sanchez stood up and called for my client. I looked at mom and gave her a small nod. It was not long until the prosecution began. 

"Can you bring us back to the incident. Before the incident rather. How did you end up with the victim, Archie Fernandez?" Keith asked while directly looking at her

"He called me. He told me he has something to tell me. Pinapapunta niya ako sa mansion."

I noticed that this time, she looks more calm and composed. Gano'n din naman si Keith.

"And perhaps did you have any idea what it is he's going to tell you?"

She shook her head. "No."

"But you agreed immediately. Have you had second thoughts?"

She swallowed hard. "No. I never thought I'd be in danger. I never imagined he would try to kill me," mabilis niyang sagot

Keith nodded. "When you arrived at the mansion, did you see anyone? I'm sure there were maids, or maybe a driver that can be a witness to prove that what you did was self-defense?"

Umiling siya. "Wala akong nakitang maids o kahit sino man. I thought, maybe they were asleep."

"You didn't doubt why there was no one there?"

"I didn't. Pumunta ako sa mansion at hindi ko aakalain na...bakit niya ako gustong patayin doon?" her voice broke

My eyes were glued to her. I want to go to her and tell her to calm down. My heart ached even more seeing her state. I then felt Christian's hand behind my back. He was trying to comfort me too.

"I told you, I had no idea he'd kill me. Umakyat ako no'n sa kwarto ng governor at doon na nangyari ang lahat. Sinakal niya ako gamit ang isang makapal na lubid. He even pointed a gun at me," she added, pain was evident in her voice. I know how hard it is for her to repeat the story over and over again.

Keith remained calm. He didn't care if she's in the verge of breaking down in front of him. He was so unapologetic. I feel like he didn't even believe a word that my mother said. Walang bakas ng emosiyon ang mukha niya.

"Sinubukan kong ngang tumakas pero masyado siyang malakas. Halos hindi ako makahinga sa pagsakal niya, nawalan ako ng boses. Sinaksak niya din ako sa hita kaya maslalong hindi ako makagalaw. Then the next thing I knew, he was strangling me on the floor. Halos hindi na ako makahinga sa pagsakal niya sa'kin. Akala ko mamatay na ako nung mga oras na 'yun pero pinilit kong lumaban. I was close to giving up. I was..." she paused

"What?" agad na tanong ni Keith

She shook her head and I saw a tear fell from her eye. She was about to speak but couldn't. It's like she's holding something back.

Yumuko siya. "Sa totoo lang, a part of me wanted to die at that moment. Naisipan kong huwag nalang lumaban. Maybe I was meant to die...I've already lost everything. I have no more will to live," she sniffed. "But then my daughter's faced flashed before my eyes," she said and looked at me.

Nagtama ang mata namin. Her eyes were bloodshot but she managed to gave me a small smile. My lips parted. Kumirot bigla ang puso ko.

"Siya yung naging dahilan kung bakit ko pa pinilit na lumaban..." And with that, she broke into tears

Binalot kami ng katahimikan. All I can hear is her soft cries. She quickly wiped away her tears and looked at Keith again.

Nabasag ang katahimikan nung biglang tumayo ang governor sa upuan niya at nagsimulang magwala. "What a great acting Cecelia! Stop trying to play the victim! Hindi magbabago na kasalanan mo pa rin kung bakit—"

The judge immediately pounded his gavel. "Silence! Order in the court."

His relatives restrained him and calmed him down. Hindi niya inalis ang paningin kay mama. He glared at her and gritted his teeth in anger.

Binalik ko ang atensiyon sa harap. Keith was unusually silent. Bigla siyang napayuko. 

Keith...why are you doing this? Why are you letting him manipulate you? Are you really doing this in your own will or you're just being forced to do so?

"You're not a real Guevarra afterall," he suddenly spoke

Napakurap-kurap si mama habang nakatingin sa kanya. "Y-yes but that doesn't mean.." she trailed off

Humugot siya ng malalim na hininga bago inangat ang paningin sa kanya. "I have come up with another conclusion, I believe that you set this all up. You must be furious when everyone found out the truth and when they kicked you out of the house. You couldn't accept it so you want to take revenge. You planned to murder Mr. Fernandez on the office of the governor to frame him up...but you miserably failed because he already caught you. You wanted to appear that the governor killed him instead of you."

I inhaled sharply, gasping for air. My lips parted while looking at him. I stiffened on my seat. Gusto kong magsalita pero tila nagbara ang lalamunan ko.

He remained calm. Hindi ko alam kung bakit kinakabahan ako sa paraan ng pagtitig niya. He's just way to intimidating without even trying. Pakiramdam ko lagi ay marami pa siyang sasabihin.

"And now, you claimed it as mere self-defense. Moreover, there was no cctv footage in the office where you killed him and you have no witness to prove that what you did was self-defense. You can't claim that it's self-defense if you have antagonized or incited the attacker into launching an assault. You may have accidentally or intentionally killed him but neither ways are still punishable by law."

Her lips parted in shock. "No..." she muttered

My mom couldn't utter a word. We were all caught off guard. Lahat ng atensiyon nila ay nasa kanilang dalawa lang. The court was enveloped in silence but the tension between us grew more. All I can hear is the fast beating of my heart. Para akong kinakapos sa hangin. 

Keith stared at my mother for a brief moment before slowly taking a step back. "I have no further questions, Your Honor."

Hindi ko inalis ang paningin kay Keith hanggang sa makabalik siya sa upuan niya. Nagkatingnan sila ni Atty. Lopez.  Binalik ko ang tingin kay mama na ngayon ay tulala sa nangyari.

I slowly clenched my fist in anger. From the corner of my eyes, I can see that the audience were looking at me, especially the governor. I looked at him sharply and there was a triumph smile on his lips.

You think you've already won huh? It's still too early yet to celebrate.

"Fifteen minutes recess," the judge announced

I just hope...hope that after we come back here inside this court, my mom would plead not guilty.

"Attorney," tawag sa'kin ni Nicholas pagkalabas namin ng court

I stopped and sighed. "Not now Villamor."

He held my wrist and turned to face him. "What's wrong? You did well a while ago."

Hindi ako sumagot ni tignan siya. I walked passed by him and went to the bathroom. There was no one inside. I went to the sink to wash my face.

Pumikit ako ng mariin at inalala ang nangyari. I felt like Keith trampled on my ego and crushed my self-esteem. Mas lalong nag-alab ang galit ko sa kanya.

All of a sudden, I heard the door swung opened. Naramdaman kong may pumasok na tao sa loob. I closed the faucet and let the water on my face drip on the sink.

"Atty. Cervantez right? That was once a Guevarra," the lady beside me spoke. Tumingin ako sa kanya. It was one of the prosecutors, Atty. Lopez.

She opened the faucet and washed her hands. She then, looked at the mirror and fixed her short, black hair. She looked at me and gave me a small smile. "You know, I've heard a lot of stories about you." 

I smiled weakly. "Oh, really? I'm used to it."

"I never thought I'd see you at the court. You surprised me Attorney."

Kumuha ako ng tissue at pinunasan ang mukha ko. "I have no time for autographs."

I don't know where this is going. I'm not sure if it's a compliment or an insult. Naalala ko pa kung paano niya ako titigan kanina na para bang may kasalanan ako sa kanya.

"But in this case that we're working on, you seem not at your best state. I admit, I had high expectations from you."

Umayos na ako ng tayo at sumulyap sa kanya. "You're not making any relevance to the case Atty. Lopez. I don't care about your opinions of me."

She chuckled softly. "But you know, Atty. Sanchez doesn't hold back to any cases. He always step his best foot forward. He always do his best in every case. He's always very competitive I must say, whatever the circumstances are," she said. "That's why I'm certain and confident that we'll win this case."

Napatingin ulit ako sa kanya. 

She fixed herself for the last time before facing me. "It's been a pleasure Atty. Cervantez," sabi niya at nilagpasan na ako

***

Last day of the trial came. Huminga ako ng malalim habang hawak ang kamay ni mama. Christian was beside me as well. Kanina niya pa ako pinapakalma. I saw Nicholas in the audience sitting on the back row, watching me.

I am so nervous. Even more nervous than my own mother. Kanina pa ako hindi mapakali sa upuan ko. My palms started to sweat and my insides turned, para akong masusuka. My mom was silent the whole time, patiently waiting for this to end.

Binalik ko ang tingin sa harap. Katapat namin ang tatlong prosecutors. Keith and I made eye-contact, even Atty. Lopez is staring at me.

The clerk stood up. He's holding a piece of paper, ready to read the final verdict.

Each passing second is getting harder and harder for me to breath properly. I can feel my heart pounding inside my chest. 

"This day, April 3rd of 2021, The Regional Court of Supreme, found accused Maria Cecelia Cervantez guilty beyond unreasonable doubt of the crime of homicide for the death of Sec. Archie Fernandez II."

Para akong binuhusan ng malamig na tubig sa narinig. Hearing those words were the hardest pill to swallow. 

"Sentencing her to suffer the penalty of Reclusion Perpetua under the Revised Penal Code, the penalty is reclusion temporal with a duration of 12 years and 1 day to 20 years imprisonment. In addition, to pay P70,000 as moral damages, and P25,000 as temperate damages."

My mind went blank. Pakiramdam ko parang tumigil ang mundo. Christian called my name but I was too drowned with my own thoughts. His words were just echoing inside my ears. I got back to my senses when I felt my mother's hand slip away from mine. I looked beside me and she's no longer there. I lifted my eyes and my lips parted when I saw her being dragged by the police.

She's moving farther and farther away that I badly want to reach for her hand but my body for some reason, couldn't move. Everything turned into slow-motion. Wala akong ibang makita kundi siya...siya lang.

"F-fey, anak..." she softly called as tears began to flow down her face

I was frozen on my seat. My whole body turned numb. Gusto ko siyang tawagin pero biglang nagbara ang lalamunan ko. Nanlabo rin ang mga mata ko. I couldn't feel anything anymore aside from the tears that began to slowly fall from my eyes.