#TPTG04

Later that evening, I got home from school. As soon as I entered the mansion, I saw my mother together with the least person that I was expecting...Archie.

I caught them talking seriously in the living room. Lumayo ako ng konti at nagtago sa likod ng pader. Pinakinggan ko ang usapan nila. I startled when I heard a loud slap.

"Ang kapal ng mukha mong bastusin ang anak ko!" my mom yelled

Sumilip ako ng konti para tignan sila. Nakatalikod sa'kin si mama, kaharap niya si Archie. He massaged his jaw and smirked. Unti-unti siyang tumingin kay mama.

"Parehas talaga kayong mag-ina," he chuckled

"You really have no manners young man. Hindi ka marunong rumispeto. I'll make sure your father knows about this," mom warned and turned her back on him

"And you think that will change anything?" pahabol ni Archie

Nanatiling nakatalikod si mama sa kanya. Nakakuyom ang kamao niya. She looks scared and nervous at the same time.

"Kayong mag-ina, ang taas lagi ng tingin niyo sa sarili niyo. You think all of this is yours? The money, this life, this house, our name?" he mocked

Humarap si mama sa kanya.

Archie raised his brow. "Hindi 'di ba?"

Hindi sumagot si mama.

Tumango tango si Archie at iginaya ang mata sa buong mansion. He put his hands inside his pocket and walked towards her.

"At the end of the day, you're still powerless. And you have no authority over me. You are just one of his puppets. I'm sure you're aware of that. Soon, he'll kick you out of the house. You and your daughter, " he said near her ear. Umatras na siya palayo kay mama pagkatapos

My mom remained steady. She looks tensed. Para siyang nanigas sa kinatatayuan niya. I want to defend her but my feet was glued to the floor. Hindi ko inalis ang paningin sa kanila.

Archie walked back and forth, his hands behind his back. "Hindi niyo alam na isang araw ay lahat ng ito ang mawawala sa inyo na parang bula. Isipin mo nalang ang future ng anak mo kapag nangyari iyon." He stopped and turned his head to my mom

Nagtago ulit ako sa pader. Pinilit kong pakalmahin ang saril. 

The nerve of that guy. How could he say that in front of my own mother? Okay na akong bastusin niya pero hindi ako papayag na pati sariling kong ina ay idamay niya. I also didn't understand what he meant earlier and why mom reacted that way. Whatever the reason is, he needs therapy. 

The same night, I took a warm bath to ease my body and to relax my mind.

I started blankly at the bubbles on my tub then I began cleaning my body. I stopped when I suddenly remembered what he did to me. Kung paano niya dinumihan ang katawan ko. I started to scrub my body hard. From my neck, to my arms, and down to my legs. Madiin ang bawat hagod ko kahit na humahapdi at namumula na ang balat ko. I ignored it. I just wanted to get rid of the filth and the traumatic memory.

But no matter how hard I try to forget it. I just couldn't. It's engraved on my mind, until I get old.

I slammed my hand on the water which caused a small splash. I closed my eyes and ran my fingers through my hair. I slowly hugged my knees and placed my chin on top of it. Kinagat ko ang pang ibabang labi at pumikit ng mariin.

Hindi nagtagal ay napadilat ako dahil narinig kong may kumatok sa pinto ko. It opened and I saw my mother standing behind it.

Malungkot siyang ngumiti. "Fey."

I blinked twice and looked away. Tuluyan na siyang pumasok at lumapit sa'kin.

"I'm sorry.." I heard her say

I gulped. "Sorry for what?"

She sat on the stool beside my tub. "If I wasn't able to protect you. Kung nagkulang ako bilang ina," malumanay niyang sabi

There was a long moment of silence. Hindi ko siya magawang tignan. I wasn't in the mood to talk dahil masyadong akong maraming iniisip. 

"What did you and Archie talk about?" I asked, changing the topic

I wanted to know what's behind their heated conversation earlier. I know there's something going on. Isa iyon sa bumabagabag sa isip ko. I couldn't let it pass.

I looked at her because she suddenly went silent. Her mouth gaped open, hesitant to answer my question. She was also surprised maybe because she didn't expect that I heard their conversation.

Is it really that hard?

What is she hiding from me?

"When I got home, I saw you guys talking. He insulted you. What did he say?"

Napakurap-kurap siya. "Nothing. Pinagsabihan ko lang siya," tipid niyang sagot

I bit my lip. "I know there's more mom. Why are you so afraid to tell me? May iba pa ba siyang sinabi sa'yo? Nakita ko kung paano ka niya binastos. What does he mean by-"

I wasn't able to finish my words when she suddenly placed my head on her chest. She then put her chin on top of my head. Hindi ako kumibo.

"I will tell you everything soon, when you're ready. But for now, I will try my best to protect you."

Protect me from what mom? 

Why do I feel like you're hiding something from me?

I felt the warmth of her hand on my cheek. I felt at ease. It somehow reduced the pain in my heart. And a reminder that at least, there's still someone who's here for me.

The next day I woke up earlier than usual. I didn't eat breakfast since I'd get to eat with Archie and I didn't want to see his face. Ayokong masira ang araw ko.

"Goodmorning Ma'am Fey," bati sa'kin ng driver ko pagkalabas ko ng mansion

I stepped back since he didn't look familiar to me. 

I felt uneasy. I became more vigilant and cautious with men around me. That I must protect myself.

My brows furrowed. "Where's Manong Richard?"

His brows raised. "Po? Ahh nagpapahinga po. Ako po yung pumalit sa kanya. Hindi niyo po ba ako naalala? Ako po yung nagsundo sa inyo noong isang araw," he explained

I looked at him, completely confused.

"Ahh. Vince nga po pala," he introduced and offered his hand but I took a step back again

Umawang ang labi niya. He smiled awkwardly and looked away.

Mahigpit ang hawak ko sa bag ko habang inoobserbahan siya.

He looks young. He's also taller than me. Medyo kayumanggi ang kulay ng balat niya. Payat siya at hindi gaanong kalakihan ang katawan niya. Sa itsura niya ay halatang hindi nalalayo ang edad namin.

"So you're...my new driver?" I asked

He nodded. "Opo."

"For how long?"

Umiwas siya ng tingin at nag-isip. "Hindi ko po alam sa papa niyo."

I sighed and nodded.

"Ayos lang po ba kayo?" tanong niya

Umayos ako ng tayo at tipid siyang nginitian.

We remained standing for a few seconds. We both felt awkward. Kung hindi pa ako tumikhim ay hindi siya gagalaw. Natauhan siya at pinagbuksan na ako ng kotse. I walked towards the car and silently went inside. Pinanood ko siya hanggang sa makapasok din sa driver's seat. 

I saw that there are books and papers scattered on the passenger's seat as well as the dashboard. Nakakalat silang lahat.

"Ay ma'am. Pasensiya na po pala dito. Teka lang," he said nervously and quickly fixed his things

"Were you studying?" I asked

"Kanina po."

"Are you already in college?"

He nodded. "Opo. First year engineering."

"Then why are you here when you're suppose to be in school? Why are you my driver?"

Tumigil naman siya sa pagaayos at tumingin sa'kin. Umiwas din siya agad. Magsasalita na sana siya pero tinikom niya ang bibig niya tila ba nagdadalawang-isip kung sasabihin niya ba sa'kin.

I still waited for his answer. 

"Ako yung pumalit kay papa," mahina niyang sabi

Kumunot ang noo ko. "Papa mo...si Manong Richard?"

He slowly nodded, a bit embarrassed.

My jaw dropped. "W-what? Bakit ka pumayag? Hindi mo ba naisip yung pag-aaral mo at tinanggap mo agad yung trabaho? I mean, you should be studying."

I remember I told my father to replace Manong Richard because he's sick and old but why must he replace him with his own son who's suppose to be in school, but he's here as my driver.

"Mahirap po talaga para sa tulad naming walang sapat na pera. Sa totoo lang ay malaki ang natulong sa'min ni governor kahit na..." pumikit siya at umiling. "Basta, pangako ko nalang sa sarili ko na mag-aaral ako ng mabuti para makapagtapos para kay papa."

"And how are you suppose to do that? Sa tingin mo makakapag aral ka ng maayos sa ganitong sitwasyon? Paano ka napasok?"

"Pumapasok po ako pagkahatid ko po sa inyo pero minsan ay hindi ako nakakapasok araw-araw dahil sa trabaho ko na ito."

"But-" I paused for a brief moment. "How can you even manage your time. It must be hard to be a working student."

He gave me a small smile. "Kakayain ko. Wala naman akong choice eh. Ganun talaga. Kailangan doble ang kayod."

He started the engine of the car and drive away.

"Kayong dalawa nalang ba ng papa mo?" tanong ko

He nodded. "Opo. Galing po kaming probinsiya tapos lumuwas po kami rito sa Manila. Thankfully, tinulungan kami ng governor at binigyan si papa ng trabaho."

Manong Richard has been my driver eversince, but I didn't know he has a son. I was still a kid back then. I didn't care about our drivers. Marami sila at papalit palit. Si Manong Richard lang ang naalala ko.

"Nagpapasalamat nalang ako na hindi niya tinanggal si papa sa trabaho. Muntikan na po kasi dahil sa katandaan ni papa pero nagpresinta ako na ako nalang ang papalit. Pumayag naman siya. Kung sakaling sesantihin si papa ay mahihirapan kami maghanap ng panibagong trabaho. Baka tumigil din ako sa pag-aaral. Baka umuwi kami sa probinsiya. Wala naman po kasi kaming ibang hanap buhay...kaya malaki po talaga ang utang na loob namin kay governor."

Umawang ang labi ko sa huli niyang sinabi.

I sighed and laid my back on my seat. 

Well, at least he didn't quit school to work. But deep inside ay naawa ko sa kanya. He's still a teenager like me. I wish my dad could have chosen someone different. I want to talk to him about it but he'd think that I'm complaining again. And end up scolding me. Naalala ko ay hindi nga pala ako ang masusunod.

"Kumain ka na ng breakfast mo?"

He then showed me a plastic filled with ensaymada. He took a bite of it and smiled at me.

My stomach suddenly grumbled. Napansin niya iyon. Tumikhim ako at umayos ng tayo. I remembered that I didn't have breakfast today.

"Kayo ma'am? Mukhang hindi pa pa po kayo kumakain ng almusal. Gusto niyo ba?" he offered me some but I declined

"Uh, no thanks. Sa'yo na 'yan," I said half-heartedly. I admit, I'm starving right now...pero baka kasi kulang pa sa kanya iyon

He smiled. "Kunin niyo na itong isa," alok niya ulit

I bit my lips and gave in. I took the plastic from him. "Thank you."

Nagsimula na akong kumain.

"Uh, about what happened the other day-"

"Po?" 

"Can you drop the 'po' please? I feel uncomfortable. You're a year older than me. I should be calling you Kuya," I trailed off. 

I just feel awkward whenever someone treats me like that especially my maids and drivers who's so much older than me just because I'm a daughter of a governor.

"Sige p-po ma'am Fey."

"Call me Fey."

His lips parted. "Okay Fey," sumilay ang ngiti sa labi niya. "Hindi po ako sanay."

"Fine. Whatever you feel comfortable with," I sighed and took another bite of the bread

"Ano po yung sinasabi niyo kanina?"

Good thing he reminded me.

"Uhm, I just want to apologize about the other day. Noong nagalit ako at sinigawan kita. I'm sorry."

He suddenly became tensed. He kept on glancing at me on the rearview mirror. "Ah..ano, ayos lang p-po," he smiled awkwardly

Yumuko ako. "You must have had a bad first impression of me."

"Ah...hindi naman po." He sounded so nervous

"It's okay. You can be honest. I understand."

"Mmm, medyo natakot ako sa inyo. Konti lang."

I smiled weakly. "I get that a lot."

"Mukha ka kasing mature sa edad mo. Parang matanda kang kausap minsan pero mabait naman ikaw."

I slowly lifted my eyes on him. Umiwas siya ng tingin. 

I chuckled softly. "Thanks."

Hindi na kami nag-usap pagkatapos. Naging tahimik ang byahe. Unti-unti na rin akong nagiging komportable sa kanya. I have to. I have to adjust as well since he's now my driver. He seems to be a nice guy. That being said, I'm actually relieved that he's the driver. Anak siya ni Manong Richard. I guess I can trust him more than a new stranger as my driver.

"Fey."

Inangat ko ang paningin ko sa tumawag sa'kin. I saw Lou standing in front of me. Nakayuko lang siya habang pinaglalaruan ang daliri.

I arched my brow, waiting for her to speak up.

"I just want to say sorry for the other day, for my friends. I didn't mean to hurt you or anything. I admit. I was wrong," malungkot niyang sabi

"Let's just forget about it," I replied and went back to study. There are books and notes scattered on my table. I'm currently studying for the finals at ayokong may manggulo sa'kin ngayon.

"Are you mad?"

Hindi ako sumagot. 

"Sorry talaga. I mean, we're still friends right?" she added and sat on the chair in front of me

Hinanap niya ang mata ko. And because of that, I got distracted. Binaba ko ang ballpen na hawak at tinignan siya.

"If that's what you want then so be it."

Bumuntong hininga siya at yumuko. Binalik ko ang atensiyon sa pag-aaral.

"By the way, uhm...I heard the rumors about you and your cousin. Is it true that he-"

Napahinto ako sa pagbabasa. I looked at her intently. Tinikom niya ang bibig niya.

I got triggered by what she said. Stress na stress na ako ngayon at maslalo pang uminit ang ulo ko nang may maalala.

"Can we talk some other time Lou? Can't you see that I'm studying for the finals?" I said, irritated

Napakurap-kurap siya. "But-"

Hindi ko na pinatapos ang sasabihin niya at agad na tumayo. I quickly fixed my things and left her.

It's already been a week since that incident happened and people are still talking about it.

I already expected it but it still pisses me off. Do they even know how traumatic it is for me? Yet they still continue to talk about it as if I'm not their classmate. Hindi ba sila marunong makiramdam?

They kept throwing glances at me. I can hear their murmurs from a distance. Patuloy lang ako sa paglalakad at nilagpasan sila. Some were looking at me apologetically. 

"Totoo ba kaya?"

"Hindi ko din sure eh pero sabi ng kaklase ko nakita raw niya."

"Grabe 'di ko mai-magine. Baka mabaliw na ko kung nangyari yun sa'kin.

"Same. Baka nga 'di na ko pumasok eh."

Unti-unting bumagal ang paglalakad ko dahil nakita ko ulit ang isa sa mga lalaki na kasama ko sa principal's office. It was the boy who saw the incident but chose to turn a blind eye.

Our eyes met and he looked shocked. Mahigpit ang hawak ko sa libro habang nakatitingin sa kanya. He's a few meters away from me, looking at me too. Halata ang nerbyos at takot sa mukha niya.

"Mark!"

Napalingon siya sa tumawag sa kanya. Lumapit ang kaibigan niya sa kanya at inakbayan ito. He looks worried for his friend. Mark wasn't able to answer. His friend looked at me too. Maski siya ay nagulat.

Sa huli ay tinalikuran ko nalang sila. Pagkatalikod ko at tumambad sa harap ko si Lou.

"Fey! Finally, I found you," she said, panting

I watch her as she slowly catches her breath. She smiled awkwardly and held my shoulder.

"I just want to apologize again. I was stupid. I didn't know that it was a sensitive topic for you and..."

I wasn't able to pay attention to what she was saying 'cause my eyes caught a group of girls in the field. Kumunot ang noo ko habang pinapanood sila. Naglaho nalang ang boses ni Lou sa pandinig ko.

"Again, I'm sorry. I didn't know what I was thinking. Hindi ko rin alam kung ano yung lumalabas sa bibig ko. Hindi ako matapobre kagaya nila. Maarte lang ako minsan pero-"

My eyes widened when I saw how the girl aggressively pulled the other girl's hair. Nilagpasan ko si Lou para lapitan ang mga estudyante pero agad niya kong pinigilan. I saw her holding my arm, restraining me.

"Don't," seryoso niyang sabi habang nakatingin sa'kin

"Let go Lou."

"Please Fey. H'wag mo nang idamay ang sarili mo sa gulo nila."

We stared at each other for a few second. I looked at her hand on my arm. I removed it without saying a word. I left her and went to the group of girls in the field. I heard Lou called my name but I ignored her. I walked even faster. It was hot and sunny that's why my brows are furrowed. My temper is slowly rising, seeing the girls in front of me.

"Hey! Stop it!" I scolded

It looked like they didn't hear me since they still continued to laugh and bullied the innocent girl.

"I said stop it!" I yelled and held her arm before she could hit the girl. Hinarap ko siya sa'kin.

She glared at me. Pinilit niyang tanggalin ang kamay ko na nakahawak sa braso niya pero maslalo ko iyong hinigpitan.

"Let go of me!" she shrieked. 

The rest of her friends became alert. Humakbang sila palapit pero matalim ko silang tinignan

"Don't you dare come near me," I warned

Their eyes widened in fear and automatically took a step back. I shifted my gaze back to the girl in front of me.

"What the hell is wrong with you?! Let go of me!" she exclaimed

I then released her arm. She massaged it and glared at me.

I turned around and saw the girl that they were bullying. I walked towards her and examined her body. She wasn't in a bad state as I thought she was.

"Okay ka lang?" I asked

Tipid siyang ngumiti at tumango. Napangiwi siya bigla sa sakit.

"What's wrong?"

My gaze lowered on her arm. Nakita kong may gasgas ang siko niya. Napatingin din siya doon at hinawakan. Her hair was a mess and so is her face. May konting dumi iyon.

"Can't you just mind your own business Fey? Pinagchichismisan ka na nga ng tao dahil sa pag-harass ng pinsan mo sa'yo e."

I heard the bullies behind me said. Nilingon ko ulit sila. I walked towards her until our faces are just inches away from each other. She flinched. Magkasalubong pa rin ang kilay niya.

"I don't care about people's judgements about me. Don't change the subject here. What gives you the right to bully someone?"

"And what are you? Some kind of hero?" she mocked. Her friends behind her laughed too.

"No, because I'm a decent human being unlike you."

Her smile faltered. She gritted her teeth in anger. "Acting all tough huh Fey? Pare-parehas lang kayo. You know why people are so scared of you? Na walang gustong makipagkaibigan sa'yo? Because if they try to, then they're just putting themselves in danger. Mapapahamak sila ng dahil sa'yo. Wala silang kalaban laban. You and your filthy family deserves to be-"

I couldn't help it anymore and slapped her in the face. I heard them gasped. Her jaw dropped. Hinawakan niya ang pisngi niya at matalim akong tinignan.

"Don't you dare insult my family," I almost choked at what I said. Hindi ko inalis ang paningin sa kanya.

"How dare you!" sinugod niya ako pero pingilan siya ng mga kaibigan niya. 

"Let's go Stacey. H'wag na natin siyang patulan. Baka may makakita pa sa'tin," awat ng kaibigan niya

Stacey gritted her teeth in anger. Her claws, ready to attack me. I remained calm while staring at her in pure disgust. Sa huli ay tumalikod na siya at mabilis na naglakad palayo. Her friends gave me one last look before following her.

Nakahinga na ako ng maluwag pagkatapos. I took a deep breath and calmed myself down before facing the girl behind me.

"Are you okay?" tanong ko at nilapitan siya

She nodded while still holding her elbow.

"That needs to be treated," I said, referring to the wound on her elbow

"Thank you," she muttered. "Alam kong mabigat ang pinagdadaanan mo ngayon pero pinili mo pa rin akong tulungan,"

I gave her a small smile. "You really should not let them bully you like that. Hindi ka pwedeng manahimik nalang basta basta kapag alam mong mali na ang ginagawa sa'yo. I don't tolerate bullies like them. Did you ever try to talk to the teachers about them?"

She swallowed hard. "No...because I'm scared. I'm not like you. I'm not as privilege like you. I don't think this school cares about these things. The bullying, I mean. They barely care about students, not unless we're someone like...you."

"It's not about the social status. People should respect one's right and basic human dignity. And trust me, I may be privilege but..." I paused and sighed. "It's a different case for me."

I believe that everyone should be treated equally no matter the gender, social status, race, identity, values and beliefs. But unfortunately, some failed to do so.

I looked at her I.D. and read her name. "Jessica right?"

She looked at it too and nodded.

"From now on, you should learn how to stand up on your own because not everyone will. Don't let them hurt you again okay?"

She stared at me for a few seconds before nodding. Unti-unti rin siyang ngumiti pagkatapos. "Thank you."

Pagkatapos naming mag-usap ay nagpaalam na siya para pumunta ng clinic. I offered to accompany her but she declined. She told me she can manage.

I stayed here at the field. Buti nalang ay may puno sa tabi kaya hindi ako nasisikatan ng araw. Malakas din ang simoy ng hangin. It calmed me down.

"Why must you always stick your nose into other people's business?"

Napalingon ako sa nagsalita. It was the least person I'm expecting.

"I didn't expect you'd show up here Keith," I calmly said

His lips curved into a crooked smile. "Just why, Fey?"

His brows were furrowed because of the blazing sun. His hands were inside his pocket. The wind blew on his hair exposing a bit of his forehead. Seryoso lamang siyang nakatingin sa'kin.

I swallowed hard. "I'm not sticking my nose in other people's business. I can't just turn a blind eye."

"And what did you get in return? What did it cost you?"

I slowly clench my fist. "I don't know where this is going."

"For once Fey, unahin mo rin yung sarili mo, kaya ka napapahamak eh."

We were intently staring at each other. None of us want to break eye contact. His stares were intense yet soft at the same time as if he can read my mind. Naguguluhan ako sa kanya. His expression was unreadable.

"Don't be so heroic all the time Fey. You don't know where you're putting yourself into," he said

Napailing nalang ako. "I don't get your point."

Nagsimula na akong maglakad. Lalagpasan ko na sana siya pero bigla siya ulit nagsalita.

"Not all people can return the kindness that you showed them. Not all can repay you back. Don't expect it. Hindi lahat ng tao may utang na loob. You always defend people but you get nothing in return. Better watch your back."

He let out a long sigh. By the tone of his voice, there was bitterness and hatred.

"You should learn how to defend yourself too. Not all people deserves to be saved."

Those were his last words bago niya ako lagpasan. I was left dumbfounded.
Paulit-ulit na tumatakbo sa isip ko lahat ng sinabi niya. I didn't know how to react or what to feel. I just stood there, frozen on the ground.