***Warning adult content. Not recommended for young readers. Another note, if you don't like it don't read it. Just move along. For the rest of you, enjoy the rebooted version of this chapter***

https://youtu.be/jh71Nc5PjN0

Chapter song "Know Your Worth" By Khalid 

It's been two days since I woke from the incident. I hate that word; it's completely understated because it wasn't just an incident. It was attempted murder; but fuck I can't live my life calling it that. Harry has kept me from emotionally spiraling. He's an absolute lifesaver. Never leaving my side except for going to the bathroom or the Starbucks that's located in the hospital cafeteria.

I'm being released from the hospital today. I haven't seen the girls yet; they don't need lifelong memories of me hooked up to a monitor and IV. It's bad enough I'll have bruises and stitches when I come home.

Sam has taken some time off work to stay with them at Harry's house. I don't think any of us are ready to stay at the cottage, and from what I understand my blood is just getting cleaned up today. Harry has hired someone to clean up the mess, the situation was too traumatic for any of us to have emotional strength to do it on our own. Every one of us needs a little time to process everything.

Harry comes waltzing back in the room. He's carrying my favorite coffee and pastry with a huge grin on his face.

"Iced vanilla latte and a cheese danish for the love of my life."

I flash him an endearing and grateful grin.

"When I get out of here, you'll have to stop bringing me treats with such high caloric value. Too many guilty pleasures, I'll be huge."

"First of all, most of your guilty pleasures don't involve intaking calories, they involve losing them." He winks at me with a cheeky smirk. "And second, you'll be beautiful no matter what. More of you to love."

I giggle quietly and pull him by his shirt so I can give him a chaste kiss.

"I love my little comedian."

He smiles triumphantly.

"Love you too Darling. Not to change the subject, but are you ready to go home today?"

My body immediately tenses: the thought of life outside the safety of the hospital walls is terrifying. Immediately following his question, Harry senses my emotional discomfort. Panic sets in when he mentioned home, I can't go back there, but I have nowhere else to go.

"Willow, it's okay Baby. I'll take you home with me. You don't ever have to go back to your place ever again. As far as I'm concerned, my home is our home now."

He intertwines our fingers and squeezes gently. Leaving a lingering kiss on my forehead, then another on my lips.

The idea of trying to sleep in my room makes me sob quietly. When I close my eyes, I can see James' terrifying stare. My thick blood is pooling on the floor by my head. These visions make that bedroom, and the entire house for that matter, the last place I want to be. It scares the shit out of me, and I'm angry, because I love that house. We'd made it our home. It's always been so sunshiny and full of life. I can't even imagine it being that way ever again.

The problem is, I don't have any other choice. Sam and I can't afford to find a new place and move. And I'm not letting Harry carry the burden of taking us in. We're not his responsibility, he's done so much already. Although I'm already madly in love with him, we've only known each other a week. I can't accept his offer to stay in his home, that's his sanctuary and he deserves his privacy.

"Come here Baby." Harry wraps me in his arms rocking me and stroking my hair. "It's ok if you need to cry. I'm here."

I bury myself deeper into the cocoon of his grasp. Tears staining his shirt. I'm not sure how long he's been holding me, but he doesn't let go until I'm ready. I can't thank him enough for being in my life. Not just as my boyfriend, but as my friend too. Most people would tell me not to cry.

Human nature is to avoid painful feelings. It's easier to sweep them under the rug, to pretend they don't exist. Harry is more emotionally intelligent than others. He's wise beyond his years, without a doubt I know he'll be by my side every step through this healing process. Encouraging me to do whatever it takes to get better, instead of asking me to ignore my fears so they can grow beneath the surface until they erupt.

"Willow, listen to me. I want you to know I'm here for you no matter what. I'll do everything in my power to make you feel safe. If you need to cry, then cry. It you need to scream, then scream. Whatever it is, we're a team and you have a new home now. The girls can both have their own room. There's plenty of security, we'll get them in a private school. Let's just start over, ok?"

Sitting on the edge of the hospital bed he's holding my hands to reassure me. As I said, he's emotionally mature for his age, but I don't think he has a clue what he's getting himself into. Not only is he offering me the refuge of his home, but he's offering that same space to my children as well.

"I can't let you do that Harry. We're not your responsibility, I won't let you flip your whole world upside down, it's your private space." He tries to argue with me, but I put my hand up telling him to stop and listen. "I have no way to afford paying for private school. Asking you to start your life over isn't something I'm willing to do."

"Willow, please listen to me, I love you, and when you love someone you take responsibility for caring for that person no matter what the cost. I have no doubts in my mind this is what I want. I know it's crazy, and please don't worry about the money. I want the girls safe, when people find out you're living with me the press will be unrelentless. They deserve a safe space at home and at school. My home, my life, and my heart belong to you...all three of you."

"What the hell did I do to deserve you. It's hardly been a week since we first met, and I know you'd move heaven and earth for me. This is a big commitment, are you really sure about this? I don't want you making these decisions on a whim just because we're currently in the middle of this shit storm."

He cups my chin to direct my attention to his gaze. I can see the sincerity in his eyes.

"Do you remember what I told you a few days ago?"

"Which part? You've told me a lot of things."

I shrug.

"When I tell you I'm gonna do something, that's a solid promise. I don't say anything without full intention of following through with it. I love you, and I don't care if we met last week or if it was years ago. That doesn't change anything, I'm completely dedicated to you and I'm ready for this."

"There are no words to describe how special you are. You're truly the most remarkable person I've ever met, without a doubt one of a kind. I love you so much."

I nervously wring my hands, terrified to take the next step. I'm not the best at making commitments, because honestly with my past they scare the shit out of me. Somehow and someway he finds a way to erase all the apprehension. Finally, I look up from my hands with more confidence and convection than I've ever owned.

"I'm ready, let's do this."

Harry's smile could light up a pitch-black night. He breathes a sigh of relief.

"Oh my god, I love you so much Angel. Let's get you ready to go home."

***

"Before we leave, I want to give you a heads up. The paps caught wind of you being in the hospital. My security arranged for us to get out of here safely. We're gonna leave separately."

"Baby, no I don't want to be separated from you. Please don't leave me alone."

"Slow down Princess. I just want to make sure no one follows us, then we'll stop and I'll take you the rest of the way home. I know it sounds complicated, but I don't want anyone harassing you. You don't need that right now. I promise, everything will be fine. Do you trust me?"

"With my life."

"Okay, I'm going to leave first to distract anyone waiting outside. This is Bill, my bodyguard, he'll be taking you about 15 minutes later. I love you and I don't want you to worry. I'm not gonna let anything happen to you and neither will he. I promise, he's better than the Secret Service."

Bill nods to me with a straightforward grin. He doesn't talk, but I guess I'm not sure what to expect a bodyguard to be like. I'm assuming they don't speak much, just continually keeping an eye on their surroundings. To keep the situation comfortable, I offer him a genuine smile. If Harry trusts him, then so do I.

Harry stands before me and stares into my eyes. It's like he's waiting until he knows for sure I'm ok with the arrangement. When he's fully convinced, a smile graces his beautiful lips, then he kisses me quietly on his way out of the room.

***

The plan to escape the hospital works perfectly. There aren't any issues and Harry is back in the car driving me home.

"See, I told you everything would be fine. We're almost home."

The moment we make it through the gate at the house my tension eases enough for me to feel safe again. In the short amount of time I've spent here, I've always felt peaceful and without worry.

"Welcome home Beautiful..." He grins infectiously. "Can I tell you how excited I am to say that? This is your new home."

I smile while caressing his cheek.

"You're the most adorable man I've ever met. I'm happy to be home and I'm dying to see my girls...and Sam."

"I called Sam when I left the hospital. The girls are so excited to see you. She hasn't told them about what happened, so we'll have to ease into that conversation. As of now, the only thing they know is that there was an accident. I'll be here with you through all of it. We'll get through this together."

"How is it that you manage to make me feel completely confident with all of your plans?"

"I'm just that good." He giggles. "Let's get you inside Love."

***

The moment I step inside the front door, you can hear young footsteps running towards me. Harry stays outside in the garage tinkering about, giving the girls some time alone with me before the big introduction.

"Mama, we missed you!"

They both wrap themselves around me. Sam slowly follows them into the room, her eyes threatening to shed a few tears. She mouths the words I love you and I do the same. We haven't seen each other since I was laying on my bedroom floor. She's been here taking care of the girls while Harry has been at the hospital taking care of me.

"Oh, my babies I missed you too." I lean down and kiss them both atop their heads.

"Mama, what happened? How did you get hurt? We were so scared."

Lark is full of questions, but I know she has a suspicion my injuries aren't from anything accidental. Knowing her father's temper; she looks more than terrified to hear the answers. Looking devastated at the realization of what could've taken place. My heart is breaking for her, it's not fair for a child to live life this way.

"Well..."

Sam interjects, now isn't the time to have this conversation.

"Hey girls, let Mama get settled and then we can talk about that later."

"Ok Auntie Sam."

They want to know what happened, but they let it go for now. Lark sighs uncomfortably, and Lily grabs my hand leading me to the couch. One of her greatest characteristics is that she loves to make other people happy and comfortable. She brings me a pillow and blanket that she had waiting for me.

"Mama, did you know Harry has a pool?"

Sam leaves the room to bring Harry in to meet the girls.

"Yes, did you enjoy staying at Harry's house?"

Lark grins ear to ear.

"Oh my gosh yes, his movie theater is awesome."

"Let me guess, you watched YouTube on the big screen the whole time?

Lark sheepishly grins.

"Can we stay for longer?"

"We can talk about that later. Ok?"

She nods politely, both girls are snuggled on my lap. Instinctively my hands stroke their hair, I want them to feel the safety of my presence.

"Hey girls..."

"Yes Mama." They say in unison.

"There's someone who wants to meet you." Jumping off the couch in excitement, they look at me begging for permission to run and hug him.

He kneels to embrace them with loving arms. His stature is fairly tall, and whenever he meets children, he lowers himself to their height. He's adamant about giving everyone complete eye contact and he treats children with the equal respect of an adult. It's one of the many qualities that make him so uniquely a gentleman.

Lily squeals when he hugs her tightly.

"Harry!"

Lark is being bashful and a bit starstruck. He kisses them on the forehead and squeezes them tight.

"I'm so happy to meet you."

The girls blush making him smile as he looks across the room at me. His eyes twinkle partially glazed with happy tears.

"Let's go sit with Mama."

Harry pats himself on the shoulder signaling Lily to hop on his back. Once she's settled, he grabs Lark's hand leading them both to the couch.

He attentively carries on a conversation with the girls for quite some time. It's helpful to have them distracted from asking any difficult questions. Lily is happily sitting on his lap and Lark rests her head on my shoulder.

"Ok, everyone I'm gonna meet Niall for dinner."

Sam knows that we need to have the serious talk with the girls. Using her dinner date with Niall as an excuse, she discreetly removes herself from the conversation. It's not that she doesn't want to offer us her support, but she knows I'm more than safe with Harry guiding me through the rest of the evening.

And I think she wants to give us a bit of privacy too. I'm positive Harry told her that the girls and I are moving in with him, he's so excited I'm sure he'll tell anyone who'll listen. Either way, there's a lot we need to discuss with Lark and Lily. 

"I'll tell Niall hello and that you can't wait to meet him."

"Can we meet him tonight?"

Lily's anticipation makes her eyes light up like a Christmas tree.

"Not today kiddo, but soon. I promise."

Sam gives me a hug and holds me tighter than ever before.

"I love you Will. I'm here for you always."

I try to conceal my teary eyes from the girls as I hug her back.

"I love you too Sam. And don't worry, I know I can always count on you."

Both girls give her hugs on her way to the door.

Harry escorts her out, I can faintly hear their whispered voices.

"She's really lucky to have you as a friend. Thank you for taking care of Lark and Lily while she was in the hospital. And thank you for helping me..." He sounds like he's choking up a bit. "...that day. I appreciate you keeping me calm."

"No need to thank me. I love them, they're my family. And so are you, anyone who loves her so completely is part of my family as well. She's lucky to have you in her life too. Call me if you need anything. Day or night, we'll get her through this together."

"You're one in a million Sam, thank you. You behave and take good care of my boy Niall."

"That's a deal, goodnight."

***

After dinner, the four of us settle back on the couch. It's time for the talk, I need to get this over with. Just jump right in, rip off the band aid. It hurts much less if you get it over quickly. Lark can sense the tense mood in the room, it makes her squirm in her seat. In her own way, Lily knows something is wrong too, her wide eyes full of unspoken questions.

"Mama, where's Daddy?"

Harry immediately takes my hand, illustrating his comfort and support. I've rehearsed this conversation in my head a hundred times and still no words seem right. Bottom line, I just have to tell them in the most age appropriate way. Parenting is a learn as you go experience, although no parent should ever have to solve these kinds of problems, I don't have a choice. 

"A lot of things have happened in the last few days. The other day Mama and Daddy got in a fight."

Lark shakes her head and scoffs loudly.

"You two always fight."

"Sweetie I know, but this fight was a lot worse."

My heart is starting to race, and I can feel an episode of hyperventilation in my near future.

Harry leans over and whispers in my ear.

"Baby, I'm here."

Panic is written all over their faces. I'm the worst at trying to hide my feelings. If you do a Google Images search for the saying, she wears her heart on her sleeve, my picture would be the first to show up.

"Daddy got really angry..."

There's no easy way to tell your children that their father tried to kill their mother.

"Willow, are you sure you're up for this right now?"

"Yeah, we have to tell them."

"You're scaring us. What happened?" Lark pleads.

"When you were playing at Ms. Amber's, your father came into the house. He was angry and he hurt me. That's why I've been in the hospital."

"Why? Why would he do that?" Lily whines.

"Mama, he promised us he'd never hurt you again. I'm sorry, I saw him drinking and I didn't call and tell you. This is all my fault."

"Lark, don't you dare blame yourself for this. Your father has an illness and he needs to get some help. You're a child and it's not your responsibility to babysit him or take care of me. Your only responsibility is to be a kid."

Harry takes this as his cue to speak up, it's obvious I'm at a loss for any other explanation.

"Lark sweetie, sometimes people get angry and do stupid things. And that doesn't make your Daddy a bad person. He just made a mistake."

Lily starts crying because she's torn between worrying about me and what'll happen to her father. She's old enough to know when you hurt someone like this, you're going to be punished.

"Mama, what'll happen to him? Where is he?"

"Princess, he had to go with the police. It's not ok to hurt anyone no matter how angry you are. I know you're upset, but everything is going to be ok."

I look over at Harry, he's staying completely strong which is exactly what I need right now. I couldn't be more grateful that he has become my anchor, keeping me strong. His arm is around my shoulder and he pulls me towards his chest tightly. The girls continue crying and he wraps them in his arms as well. At this point they give up their questioning and just cry and snuggle me until they pass out on my lap.

We sit in the strangely quiet room holding these two innocent children. I'm feeling contemplative, wondering if things will really be ok. I think Harry is doing the same. Nevertheless, neither of us speak for quite some time. These are moments that need to happen, believing any of this can be easily fixed is naivé and reckless. Not only is this room filled with silence, it's filled with four fragile psyches. As the adults, I fear that Harry and I are getting ready to carry a very heavy load. It's not going to be easy, but I'm confident that I can get through this with his help.

"Hey Beautiful, I'm gonna carry Lily to bed. Can you get Lark awake enough for her to walk or do you need me to carry her too?"

"Thank you my love, I'll get her. But you're a rock star for carrying Lily for me. I want you to know that she adores you, both of them do."

I lean over to give him one quick kiss.

"I'm glad to hear that, because I've fallen in love with them already."

His grin is sheepish yet proud.

"In spite of our current circumstances, I can't remember the last time I've been this happy. I love you Harry."

"I love you too Willow. Let's get the girls to bed. You need to get some rest, in a real bed."

"Yes sir, you're the boss." I tease.

***

Harry is waiting for me in our room. He's already laid pajamas on the bed for me. Before tonight, we always slept naked with one another. Many men wouldn't consider the appropriateness of that now that the girls are here, but he doesn't miss a thing. When I walk in the room, he flashes me a warm smile that lights up his face. He gently places his hands on my hips and kisses my forehead.

"Let's get you ready for bed, hm?"

He proceeds to remove my clothes one by one. Not in a sexual way, instead in a nurturing manner. It's sweet, but it feels like he's somewhat distant. Standing in only my bra and underwear I take my fingers and sensually run them through his curls. I want nothing more than to kiss him madly. He reciprocates the kiss at first, but quickly pulls away from my lips.

"Harry, what's wrong? Why won't you kiss me?"

"Because kissing you like that leads to me wanting to have sex with you. That's not what you need right now. It's not the right time."

"Why? Don't you want to be with me?"

He sighs then sits me on the bed while holding my hands in his lap.

"Willow, you've been through a seriously traumatic event. Let's take it slow, sometimes things get a little crazy when we're in bed. I don't want any of that upsetting or hurting you."

I look at him in disbelief.

"I get it Harry but being with you makes me feel safe. I want you to make love to me. I need you."

My eyes start to well up with tears. It's obvious I'm going to be overly emotional for a while, and I know it. I feel crazy because I'm second guessing every move he makes. Psychoanalyzing what his intentions are and whether I'm worthy of his love, simply because that's what my mind was conditioned to do.

"This has nothing to do with me not wanting to be with you. If I could, I'd keep you in bed for days making love to you. I'm really nervous how that physical contact is going to affect you psychologically. Especially if things get too heated, you know what I mean?"

"I don't know how it'll affect me either. But I'm willing to find out. I need to be close to you right now."

With an apprehensive smile he gives in. We're both suckers for the advances of the other. He leans in to kiss me slowly, loving, tenderly. This is the kiss that I need, the kiss that will heal me. I know he loves me with all his heart, but sometimes your body needs to know too. Maybe I'm crazy, maybe that's not a thing. But for me, in this moment, it's a thing.

He slides his hand under the nape of my neck and lays me peacefully on the bed. Taking a few moments to intently stare into my dark blue eyes before making his next move.

"You're the most beautiful thing I've ever seen. My heart is yours and I don't want you to feel like it belongs anywhere else."

Every move he makes seems tentative, trying not to trigger me. Although he's taking things slow, nothing has been more genuine than the moment we're in now.

We start kissing again, our tongues softly mingling. I'm savoring the familiar taste of him. His plump lips taking their time massaging mine. Both hands smoothly trace the outline of my cheeks, my neck, then finally my sides.

I'm moaning and humming within each slip of his tongue. His body is now situated between my thighs, his center grinding on mine. This gentle love making is much better than I expected. It's much deeper, and meaningful. I can feel his love for me more than ever. It's like a drug coursing through my veins. I'm an addict, I'm hooked, I'm madly in love with him.

Not only is his excitement for me evident in his pants, it's present in his touch. It's dripping from his pores and I'm devouring it.

"Harry, I love you so much."

"I love you too Baby Girl. Are you doing ok?"

"I'm more than ok, I'm perfect."

"Are you ready for me?"

"Yes..." My voice is a desperate sensuous whine.

Harry is taking everything slowly and honestly my hormonal drive is hungry for a quicker pace, but I think he knows what he's doing. Slow is what my heart and psyche needs. Sometimes it's so easy for my horny self to get in the way of my emotions, so for now I let him take the lead.

My body has never been treated with such care. From the way he removes my panties and bra to the tender way he eases himself inside me. I've never felt safer than I'm feeling right now. I'm moaning lazily as he rolls his hips pushing himself deep inside me. My breath is relaxed, the opposite of how it is when we're wildly fucking each other. He pauses a few times to gaze longingly into my eyes, brushing the fallen tendrils of hair away from my face.

He slowly connects his lips to the place on my neck that drives me crazy. The stuttered heat from his breath causes goosebumps to cover my body while I writhe beneath him.

"You still okay?"

"Oh god yes."

He goes back to suckling on the soft flesh of my neck. Our passion for each other is growing as our physical movements become hungrier and less tender. We're still refraining from wild fucking, but the human body can only take some much stimulation before it needs to release.

The familiar pre-orgasmic feeling in the lower half of my body arrives. My mind chants the mantra 'yes you got it, you're gonna cum.' It's like a scratched record repeating the same tune time and again. Harry's mouth is laxed open and he's groaning loudly.

"I love you so fucking much, will you come with me Harry? Please? I'm almost there."

"Fuck yes."

He steels himself, determined to drive into my sweet spot just perfectly. I love the way his orgasm is orchestrated to synchronize with mine. Our bodies refusing to disentangle, like we're eternally tethered in every way.

"That's it. I feel it, you're ready aren't you? Fuck, I'm cumming."

"Oh my god yes."

My body is electrified and trembling from the beginning to the end of my orgasm. This sex was nothing like I've ever had before. Maybe it's never been this incredible because no one has ever made love to me. No one has loved me the way Harry does. It's impossible to describe, all I know is that this feeling is as close to heaven while still living and breathing on this earth.

"That was so incredibly magical. We belong together, do you know that?"

I'm making sweet soft breaths while gathering my thoughts.

"Yes, I absolutely agree. It took me long enough to find you. But the wait and all the pain along the way is worth having you now. I wouldn't change it for anything. I love you Harry, every inch of my heart and soul beats for you and the girls."

A tear forms in the corner of his eye.

"I'm so sorry you ever had to hurt. I promise you I'll never be the cause of any of your pain. I'm never letting you go."

Once again, we kiss deep and slow. Without words we're sharing our love for each other. I'm not sure how long this goes on, but eventually my eyes have gotten heavy and I need to sleep. Harry climbs out of bed and puts on some joggers and a t-shirt then dresses me the same.

"Get some rest my love."

"Ok...but Harry can you do me a favor?"

"Anything."

"Will you stay awake and hold me until I fall asleep?"

"Of course. C'mere." He pats his chest for me to snuggle up on him. "Close your eyes Princess. I promise to keep you safe. I love you." He leans down and kisses my forehead. I grab his hand gently kissing it on the back and then kiss his tummy over his shirt.

"I love you too. Goodnight..."