•Dedicated to≈ Raeli12

I feel so bad, I've been writing this book for over a year. I'm a terrible person 😂
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"There will be a day when you won't drown anymore. There will be a faithful day when you'll defeat your demons. You can make it and you will make it."

-Kamoyrocks 😊

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Jace's POV

"In just a few minutes, it will be New Years Eve." I say to Julia.

I'm glad we're back home. I missed it. I missed the memories, my friends.

"Yeah." She sits up. "What's your new years resolution?"

"To kiss you with every chance I get." I smirk

"You already did that in Paris remember?" She teases.

"No, its not enough." I hug her close to me. I playfully kiss her neck as she laughs.

I love this.

I love the fact that I can make her happy. That I can make her smile. I love the fact that I can make her laugh and just forget about everything she's going through.

She's not perfect, but she's Julia Pepper.

And that's all I need.

Most of the time it might look like I always say the perfect things to her but I'm not perfect. Hell, I'm no where near there.

Most of the time I'm just speechless. I have no idea what to say to her. But somehow I find a way. I'm still so very surprised.

She could've had anyone else but she chose me.

I don't know why she did, but she did. And I'm forever grateful to this amazing girl.

She's it for me. I know I might sound cliché about that but it is what it is.

I'm not perfect. It might seem like I am but to the hell I'm not.

I'm not.

And I don't want anyone to see me as that. I have my faults. Each and everyone makes me who I am. And I wouldn't change myself for the world.

I'm only human and I'm gonna make mistakes. Too many to count actually but I'll find a way to learn from them and become just a little bit better.

And I'm glad that she sees that.

She's a beautiful soul.

I look at the clock. Its 11:58.

I look in her dark brown eyes. I have to make this quick.

"I'm glad I'm starting this new year with you. I promise that I'll make you so happy. I wouldn't take back one minute from the day I met you. And I'm not sure you know just as about how much you mean to me but I want you to know that its a whole lot.  You mean every damn thing to me baby. And I might seem like I know everything to say but trust me, I don't. I'm glad you love me for me. "

She shakes her head affectionately.

"I'm so in love with you my Jace." She whispers, her voice filled with so much emotion.

"And I am with you my love." I whisper back to her. I could cry at just how much I love her.

We're not perfect. Trust me, we're beyond that. But somehow we manage to get by.

I kiss her with a new sense of appreciation. I've never wanted to kiss someone so much in my life.

And that's saying something.

I never wanted Bianca as much as I wanted her. I never needed her as much as I once thought I did.

But let's not talk about her anymore. Its in the past. I'm leaving them in this year and starting off without them.

By them, I mean Bianca. I mean Tanya. I mean Gabe. I mean everyone who has tried to pull us apart and take away my happiness.

I'm leaving them at 11:59.

And when the clock strikes 12:00 I couldn't help but to feel new.

"Happy New Years my love."

"Happy New Years my Jace." She whispers.

And just by hearing her voice, I knew I wasn't going to regret anything.

Julia's POV

"Are you ready?" Jace asks from beside me as he massages my thigh.

"I think suh." I let out a shaky breath.

Today's the first day of school. Which means, I have to relive what Gabe tried to do to me to the principal.

I never thought I would feel this nervous.

"You'll be okay alright? I'm here." He smiles at me.

"Okay." I whisper and he brings me in for a lingering kiss. My body is set afire as he bites down on my bottom lip. I moan shyly against him.

Just then, a knock is heard from the window.

"Damn, I see someone got there piece of Christmas present." Drake teases. I flush immediately when I see that the gang was watching us.

"Oh my god! Are you guys together?" Brook smiles widely.

"Yeah." Jace says smugly and I hit his chest, turning away from him.

"Yaasss girl! I shipped y'all from the start." Ethan squeals.

"I knew you guys would get together." Alexander comments, I didn't miss the blonde girl who he had his arm around. "Oh yeah,  this is Evangeline. My girlfriend."

"Wow. Congrats bro." I smile at him. I wave at her and she waves back shyly.

"Thanks." He smiles and looks at Evangeline lovingly.

"Anyways! Did you guys do the do?" Alex emerges out of no where.

"Alex!" Brook hits him. He laughs at her.

"I'm just checking. Now young lady. Out of the car, Now." He demands and I don't why I complied.

"Now, let's check. If you lost your little chicken, you would be walking like my grandmother. And your eyes will be shiny. Oh! And your face will start to glow. Not that it doesn't."

I laugh when I see him fake expecting my arm.

"Whatever Alex, we have to get inside. The bell is about to ring." Brook grabs his arm and we head inside.

I smile when I see a familiar blonde hair.

"Lucas." I slow down my pace to walk with him. "Hi."

"Hi Julia." He says emotionlessly. That's okay. I know he's excited to see me, that's just how he is.

You don't have to smile all the time. You don't always have to be happy.

You don't always have to put on a mask. You don't always have to hide how you feel. Sometimes, you just have to break in order to feel like your still here.

To have the urge to just let go. To just feel, there's nothing wrong with that. There's nothing wrong in wanting to feel down.  In wanting to give up. Sometimes life takes you there. To the point where you just have nothing left inside of you. And you can't hold on any longer.

And that's okay.

That's okay...

But the war is not over until you say so. You don't give up until you've given it your all and I'm just starting to understand that.

"Okay Julia, this is it. You ready?"  I nod my head at Alexander.

The school doors open and I'm not surprised to see everyone's eyes on us as we walk down the halls.

My steps seem to have gone numb as I walk closer and closer to the principal's office.

"This is it." I breathe and step into the office. I'm met with Mr. Douglas and Gabe as he glares at me.

"Miss Pepper. Please have a seat." Mr. Douglas says and I take a seat slowly. "I want you to inform me on what happen last year."

I gulp hard. I can't do this.

But I'm reminded of Jace's presence behind me and I'm back to reality.

And I tell him everything.

And I'm in complete relief when I'm done. I'm also in relief when I hear that this monster is getting expelled. And that I can make a restraining order against him.

And I march out there with pride.

I did it.

"I'm so proud of you." I hear Jace whisper as we enter our first class. I'm proud of myself too.

............

"So, what are y'all doing for prom?" Alex asks.

"The same thing we always do at prom." His brother deadpans.

"We should spice it up a little you know? Since Julia's never experienced it."

"Oh sure we can do that." Ethan says.

"I'll be right back." I say and head to the bathroom.

I answer my phone hesitantly.

"What do you want?"

"Don't you dear talk to me like that." I grimace at the sound of my stepmother.

"I asked your dad to come over and he agreed, in a few months."

I swallow down the lump that has caught up my throat. My dad couldn't come for me when I asked him to but he did when she called.

Flipping perfect.

"Okay then. Why are you telling me this? You have the audacity to speak to me after I caught you sleeping around? You have some nerve to even face my dad again."

"That's the thing. You don't tell him. And if you do, I'm gonna hurt you so bad, your mom in her grave can feel it."

"You don't scare me." I hiss.

"Oh there daughter, or should I say slut. I already have you crying." She hangs up the phone and I scoff.

I gasp when I see tears that have already escaped my eyes without noticing through the mirror.

And then the air becomes thicker, its like I'm suffocating.

I feel my demons present themselves, ready to bring me back into that place.

That place where I I relive all my fears. Where I'm back to where I started. Where I'm drowning.

That dark place.

But I don't want to go back there.

Not this time.

I have to be strong for him, for everyone, for me.

I turn to see Jace and the gang looking at me with watery eyes. And I couldn't help but to feel so hopeless, so utterly broken.

Its the fact that they're standing in front of me and yet they seem so far. Or maybe its the fact that they're seeing me at my worst, my breaking point.

Somehow, I'm not ashamed.

They're seeing that I'm not as okay as I always act. And they're finally seeing my break down. I should hide it but something inside of me is telling me not to.

I never thought being broken could feel this good.

I embrace it. I adore it. And I now own it. And I just stand there as they look at me as I take it all.

As I take my power.

I didn't cry, I didn't choke on my own air and I surprisingly didn't cut myself. I didn't even shut down.

I'm standing, literally standing. I literally don't know how, but I am. Conquering my demons who are trying to bring me back under water to drown.

Others would cower away in fear from their demons but here I am, battling them. And instead of screaming...

I smiled.

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A/N: ITS MY BIRTHDAY!!!

I decided to give you all this as a birthday gift from me. 

I won't be able to put reflections right now so the little pics will have to do. Again, I'm sorry.

This chapter literally meant the absolute world to me. If what Julia just did wasn't courageous and brave, then I don't know what is.

Fun fact: Julia and Jace were supposed to kiss the night they were in Paris on the beach

Fun fact: Jace and Julia were suppose to make love in the jacuzzi. (Haha, I'm not going to make them do it until they're older, or probably later on in the chapters. It depends on how I feel. You could comment for what you would prefer. We shall see ;)

Its takes a queen to go through pain to gain power

I don't know what on earth I did to deserve you guys but I'm thankful for every single one of you. You all have made a way to my heart and I'm never going to take that for granted.

I love you dearly...

-Kamoyrocks ❤