It seemed like a long freezing winter had settled in like an unwelcome guest.

I was cold, just as cold as I always was, but this time there was no refuge. No Thomas to take my hand and chase the blizzard away with his promises of warmth and heat.

Winter doesn't permanently kill plants, but it certainly does make it look like a barren wasteland for three months. And although my spirits weren't entirely crushed, I still wasn't happy just sitting there and watching him.

"How long do you think it'll take him to wake up?" I had asked Angelica.

"Shouldn't take longer than a month," she had returned with all the confidence in the world. "Don't worry Alexander. He's gonna be alright."

I watched the days slowly drain away, counting each one that fled and disappeared into the wind.

Thomas had been confined to what I assumed was the infirmary. It was across the hall from Angelica's room, and she didn't fail in taking charge of helping heal Thomas.

I barely left the infirmary myself, to be honest. Mostly, because I frankly didn't see the point despite the constant urging of Washington to get up and move.

"When will he wake up?" I asked Angelica again. I could tell she was beginning to get annoyed by my constant bothering her, but she didn't say anything about it.

"When he's ready."

"And when will that be?"

"I don't know, Alexander. Why don't you go on a walk?"

I read to him, even though I was pretty sure he couldn't hear me. I found some other books from Earth in the library like Alice in Wonderland or Watership Down. I did it for myself more than I did it for him, because reading to him reinforced the dwindling hope that Thomas was still alive. That he could be saved.

I was afraid. And it wasn't the situational, momentary terror that followed me through the maze.

This haunted my every thought, always at the back of my mind. If I wasn't doing something, I was thinking of Thomas.

It was a cold winter, and the firewood wouldn't light.

I sat on the same cushioned chair, knees brought to my chest as I watched Thomas. The trance he was in was deathlike; he made no movements at all and his pulse was slow and almost nonexistent.

There was a tray of untouched food sitting on the table to my left, still warm but uninviting. The orange and pink rays drifted in through the silky curtains that hardly offered any privacy from the outside world.

Night was falling, but I didn't really feel a need to sleep anymore. Thomas had watched me when I needed him to, so I believe that I should be able to do the same thing for him.

"Hey," muttered a voice from behind me along with the dragging of a chair to where I was sitting. I didn't bother to acknowledge her as Peggy sat down next to me. "How's it going?"

I shrugged, disinterested in talking.

"That good, huh?"

"Look, I'd love to talk, but I'm just not in the mood right now."

I didn't want to see her frown of disapproval that would match up so perfectly with everyone else's as they tried to drag me out of here and away from Thomas, so I didn't bother looking.

"Sure you are," she said, nudging me with her shoulder. Her tone seemed light enough, so I doubt she was frowning yet, but I didn't care to check.

"Actually I'm not."

"You have a question, don't you? Concerning me?"

I couldn't help but glance over at her in surprise. "What do you mean?" I said slowly.

"Well," she started, and I felt like an idiot for biting down on her hook like a fish drawn to the lure. "You want to ask me something!"

"Yeah, actually. What was that light thing?"

"The what?"

"The light thing. Thomas was dying and you touched him and light poured into his body? From your hand? What spell is that?"

Peggy had gone silent, the smile from her face falling fast. She was quiet for a while, and right before I decided to give up and return my gaze to Thomas, she spoke carefully.

"We all have secrets, don't we Alexander? But what's the fun in keeping a secret if nobody else knows you have one?"

"Look, I'm not in the mood for some mystical bullshit that makes no sense, so—"

"It makes enough sense if you look at it the right way."

"Riiiiight..."

"All I'm saying is that you shouldn't take anything, or anyone, at face value."

"If you want to tell me something, just go ahead and tell me. But does it have anything to do with why Maria looks exactly like you?"

Peggy's eyebrows went up, but I could see the knowing smile tugging at her lips. "I'm really surprised that my little... joke... ran as long as it did."

"Joke?"

Peggy sighed and raised her hand. I felt a rush through the air as though the very structure of it changed. I blinked, confused at what had happened. I didn't feel any different.

"There," she said with a pointed look at Thomas. "Now no unwelcome ears can listen in."

I opened my mouth to question her, but before I had the chance, she delved into her explanation.

"Quite honestly, I'm shocked anyone found out. It is always something that people tend to overlook. You're full of surprises, Alexander."

I'm not sure if I should have taken that offensively or not.

"I mean, why would I be the most powerful being in the universe? Nobody would think that I, Peggy Schuyler, was capable of it, so that's why it was such a good scheme."

"So are you Maria? Or is Maria you?"

"Maria is me, but at the same time she isn't. She's an illusion, and one of my finer works, if I do say so myself. Independent of me, entirely corporeal, intelligent thought."

It was a lot of information to process. Actually no, it's really not. It was the content of the information that was hard to process.

Nothing really made sense anymore.

"So you gave me the Divinity charm? And why did you make Thomas give you a feather in return for the crystal dragon?"

"Because that stuff isn't cheap, Alexander!"

"Why couldn't you like just... take it from him then?"

Peggy opened her mouth, but no words came out. She tipped her head to consider this and then shrugged. "Yeah, good question. My methods are mysterious, even to myself."

"And why did you give me the charm?"

"You might need it one day," she returned. The delivery of it would have been a lot more ominous if she wasn't grinning wildly. "It's so good to get that off my chest."

I had a lot of questions, but none of them could find their way to my tongue.

Peggy shot me a knowing look as the smile promptly faded from her face. "This isn't something you can tell anyone else, got it? Not even him." She nodded towards Thomas. The look in her eyes softened. "I never exactly would have guessed that you would fall for him, but I guess fate is funny like that."

Heat rushed to my face as I quickly tried my best to come up with something to say, but for once, nothing came to mind.

So I decided to change the subject. "If you are the most powerful person in the world, then why—"

"No more questions! My reasons are my own!" Somehow her grin widened, but it did the opposite of put me at ease, like smiles are typically supposed to do.

I waited in silence as the information fully sank in. My opinion of her changed of course, but it wasn't something I could put into words. Everything around me seemed to be shifting constantly without fail. How could I ground myself to this world if there was nothing to hold onto? Nothing consistent. At least there was Thomas, but now...

God—I mean Divinity—I'm already talking like he's dead.

Earth was never this hard. All I had to do there was keep walking and keep moving forward in a straight line. But in this place, nothing is a straight line. It's all scribbles and confusion.

"Are we sure that he's going to be okay?" I murmured finally, unable to tear my eyes away from him.

"Oh yeah."

I hated how simple she made it seem, how much of a non-problem she passed it off as. Because while it probably didn't concern her as much because she'd seen this thing before, it was fucking devastating to me.

I, apparently, have never lost anyone before. At least nobody I remember, because my past is nothing more than a cluster of fake memories sewed together and forced into me. And the feeling of sitting here, staring at a motionless, breathless Thomas, was unbearable.

"Hey, Alex," Peggy murmured. Her hand went to my back in a supportive way. It was perhaps the second time since I've met her display genuine emotion. "It's going to be alright, okay? Thomas has gotten his way out of worse situations. He's like a pigeon that won't leave you alone because you have the bread that he wants. Thomas isn't dead, and he isn't going to die. He's safe here." She nodded at him to emphasize her point. "He's alright."

"He's alright," I repeated. I reached over to take hold of his hand. It's strange. He was still warm.

"That's the spirit!" Peggy chirped brightly. "Hey, I'm gonna go. I'll see you later alright? Hang in there. And don't tell anyone about our little secret, okay? Cause then I'll have to kill you!"

I didn't know if she was joking or not, but I didn't really want to find out.