Chilled by the same nightmare that was becoming more and more horrific the longer I spent here, I hurried down the hallway. This time, no bird hovered just in front of my face to show me my path, and this time, I was not set out to find Thomas.

Why was this castle so overwhelmingly huge? I was pretty sure I was lost.

But I kept walking down the hallway at a faster pace than usual that might have been a little bit due to my panic.

It was silent in the castle at night. So silent that it was lonely. It was also completely absent of light, like I was a lone island in an ocean of darkness. Needless to say, I didn't feel very positive about this place without Thomas next to me.

I turned down a hallway and was greeted by a single beam of light streaming through a window and touching the carpet. Slowing my pace, I approached the window and took a hold of one of the curtains, a thin light blue silk framing the scene outside that almost appeared to be like a painting.

I took a deep breath and leaned against the wall, staring up at the silver crescent moon that hung up far above in the sky.

I wonder if this is the same moon I see from Earth? Or, is it one completely different, similar to how Perriterra is completely different from the world I had previously known to be home?

A sudden voice startled me out of my thoughts, making me jump. "What are you doing?" Although it was soft and rather quiet, it was a stark contrast to the lack of noise around me, and it cut through the air like a knife through butter.

"I'm sorry!" she exclaimed when she saw my surprise. "I didn't mean to scare you!"

"I wasn't scared," I said, forcing down my embarrassment. "Just surprised. That's all."

She gave me a disbelief, but she didn't say anything more on the subject.

"Elizabeth, right?"

She looked confused for a few seconds, as if she didn't know who I was talking about. For a moment, I panicked, thinking I fucked something up. But realization soon passed through her gaze and she nodded. "Yep. Elizabeth. That's me. Anyway, what are you doing?"

"Well, I was actually trying to find you, and then I got lost."

Her entire face lit up. "You were?"

I nodded and felt a little warmed inside at the massive grin that took hold of her mouth.

"Mind if I ask why?"

"Thomas says you're extremely skilled when it comes to reading minds, or something like that?"

Her eyes darted away, refusing to meet mine. "Well, I mean, I'm not the best there ever was but I wouldn't mind helping with something if you need help." Her words came out rushed, so garbled that it took me a moment to understand what she had said.

"That would be great," I said, trying my best at a reassuring tone.

Her gaze met mine once more, and I could feel her eyes pouring over me, as if trying to unlock something hidden deep inside. "Well, follow me."

Without another word, she led me down the same way I had come and through the maze of hallways and staircases. I wonder if I'll ever get used to this place, or if this castle will forever be nothing more than an foreign building in an alien world. I stared at the intricate patterns in the carpet to amuse myself as we walked through the halls.

Finally, she stopped outside a door and opened it. Elizabeth stepped aside to let me pass. I thanked her and went inside.

I was hit by the sweet and almost homely scent of vanilla almost immediately. It wasn't overpowering, but rather welcome. A fire crackled in a hearth that had been placed against the left wall.

The two girls I recognized as Angelica and Peggy were also occupying the room. Angelica was seated on a chair by the fire, one leg crossed over the other in a relaxed manner. Peggy was sprawled out on the bed, her eyes closed. She took a deep breath and blinked them open the moment that Elizabeth softly closed the door.

"Where'd you go?" Angelica asked. Another glance told me she was occupied with a book, but she didn't seem too invested judging by the way she perused the paper.

"You brought a friend!" Peggy exclaimed, sitting up. She didn't sound excited nor upset by this revelation.

"Uh, hi," I greeted, hiding my hands behind my back.

Angelica looked up at me and dropped the book on the table at her feet, seemingly grateful for a distraction. "Hey, Alex. Shouldn't you be sleeping or something?"

"That's polite talk for 'we don't want to put up with you right now'," Peggy advised from her spot against the wall opposite the hearth. "But that's only Angie." She swung her legs off the side of the bed and rose to her feet.

"So," Elizabeth said as she walked over to a chair next to Angelica's and gracefully sat down. "Mind reading?"

"Yeah."

"To unlock your memories?"

I swallowed back a sudden sick taste in my mouth. "Yeah."

If Thomas found out about this—and let's be honest, there's a very minute chance he won't—he would be horribly mad at me for doing exactly what he told me not to do. But some huge part of me was missing and that wasn't fair. I'm out of options.

So I swallowed back the imagined hurt look in Thomas' eyes with the bitter taste on my tongue and asked, "am I supposed to do anything?"

"Wait," Angelica said. "This seems like a very bad idea."

"Which is exactly why we're going to do it!" Peggy cheered. She joined her two sisters and sat down on the floor and patted the soft plush carpet with her hand, indicating for me to sit.

I warily crossed over and sat across from her, feeling out of place. The fire crackled in the hearth, and for a very long moment, it was the only noise in the room. Heat rushed to my face, and I doubt it was the warmth of the flames that caused it.

"Should we get started then?" Elizabeth asked, cutting into the silence.

Hesitation gripped me for a moment, but I didn't want to waste any more time and quickly nodded.

Elizabeth swallowed, looking uneasy at first. She joined us on the ground. "I won't hurt you. Or at least I'll try my best not to."

I nodded, letting my gaze focus on the fire instead, unable to meet her eyes.

Elizabeth took hold of one of my hands. Her skin was smooth and warm to touch. I focused on that for a second, trying to erase the sudden unwelcome apprehension that wormed its way into my stomach.

"Do you want to see your memories?" Elizabeth asked softly, jolting me from my trance.

"Isn't that the whole point?"

"I mean, like, physically. I can create an illusion so you can watch them if you want. It's a little trick I've been working on."

"Yeah. That's fine."

A sudden thought struck me. What if I didn't like what I saw? Oh, how terrible would that be, to not like the person I was. What would that do to me? Would I be able to live with myself if I didn't like who I had been? Or maybe I would be completely replaced by a different version of me, someone who knew magic and was apparently very skilled with it.

And—assuming everything went right and I got my memories back—what would this do to my relationship with Thomas? I've picked up that we used to not get along. I don't want to ruin my friendship with him.

I really don't.

"Alexander?" Elizabeth asked. She must have sensed my wariness, for her tone was soft like a mother's is to a baby. "Is everything alright?"

"Alexander, you don't have to go through with this if you don't want to," stressed Angelica. "Seriously, this could have some damaging effects on your health, and that isn't something we want to put you through."

Peggy remained silent, but her posture had stiffened, and for the first time tonight, she actually appeared to be serious about something.

I bit down on my lip, then felt my jaw harden. I deserved to know who I was so I know who I can be. If I didn't let Elizabeth search deep in the catacombs of my mind, I would be a coward. Maybe not to others, but certainly to myself. I cannot be too afraid of the possible outcomes to allow them to stop me from finding out who I was.

"I want to go through with this," I said, banishing the still nagging thought of Thomas' warmth from my mind.

Elizabeth smiled, but I don't think she meant to. "Alright! It might feel weird at first, but I promise to be as gentle as I can." Her grip on my hand suddenly hardened, and her eyelids pressed close.

A few moments later and she was locked in a trance. She was as still as a statue for a long time, no sign of life except for the slow rise and fall of her chest.

My body began to lightly tingle. It was similar to the feeling of your foot falling asleep, except that it was everywhere at once. It wasn't majorly uncomfortable, but I didn't enjoy the feeling in the least bit.

Slowly, everything around me became contorted. I felt a sharp tugging at my mind, pulling something away from me. A primal urge to run or fight kicked in, but I couldn't move. The tingling became so strong it began to hurt and rendered me immobile.

Everything around me was a mess of violent colors clashing against one another. Everything was fighting for my attention, but I couldn't think about anything but the tugging.

It became stronger now, and so did my panic.

The colors around me eventually faded away into nothing but a sea of whiteness. I could hear distant voices. But they were unclear. So unclear I couldn't even distinguish their tones, or if they were even voices at all.

Maybe I died.

A searing pain exploded through my body from my head. It seemed frustrated, as if hurting me wasn't enough.

I wanted to cry.

The pain got sharper, the whiteness got brighter, the voices got louder. It all worsened. And worsened. And worsened.

I was cold.

A part of me wanted to give in, to let the being pulling at my mind take hold. Another part of me wouldn't stop fighting, wouldn't give up for the world.

I felt like I was being ripped apart, my conscience being torn away from my body.

Then, scenes began to play in the whiteness like television screens. I couldn't make out what was happening in them, but there was something so jarring and unnatural about every single moment. They began to fill the whiteness one by one until I was surrounded. I couldn't focus on any single one of them, as they all demanded my attention at the same time.

I didn't know what they were, but I wanted them gone.

A loud, sudden noise cut through everything. It didn't sound anything like the sounds from earlier. The noise was followed by what was definitely a voice.

The pain was suddenly ripped away from my body, the world around me fading back into color once more. Two tendrils of warmth wrapped around me, and something equally warm pressed against my face.

A voice sounded through the room, clear and perfect. "Alex! Alex, please!"

"Thomas?" I breathed.

A sigh of relief. I felt something hot and wet splash down the back of my neck as Thomas pulled me closer.

I let him hold me until everything came rushing back, hitting me in the face. I slid my hands to his chest and pushed myself away from him as gently as I could.

Thomas' arms dropped to his side as I looked up at him. I felt a pang of emotion as I took sight of his face and the tears that ran down his cheeks.

"You're okay," he murmured, as if dazed. He wiped away his tears with his sleeves. "You're okay."

"It was working," complained a voice.

"You almost killed him!" Thomas shot back, his voice suddenly laced with acid. "What the hell were you thinking, Eliza?"

"I could've brought back his memories! I saw them; they were there!"

"He would've gone insane!"

Elizabeth grew more withdrawn at that, her lips tightening into a thin line.

"Thomas," Angelica said calmly, but her worried frown told a different story. "Calm down."

"She could have seriously hurt Alexander!"

"But she didn't!" Peggy protested. It seemed more that she wanted to add to the chaos than to actually defend her sister.

"What were you thinking?" Thomas demanded, tone as sharp as thorns.

"He asked me to!"

Thomas froze. I swallowed, feeling the waves of guilt crash into me as if I was a rock in ocean. I didn't want to meet his eyes. I couldn't. I couldn't answer to the betrayal, the hurt.

Against my better judgement, I raised my head to meet his gaze.

The hurt cut deeper into my skin than any sword could. And what's worse? It lasted for a few seconds at the most. The look was soon replaced by nothing but coldness, which looked so wrong taking up the space where the warmth belonged.

I could hear his swallow as he drew away from me. "Oh." That single syllable was devastating to hear. It was packed with emotion. With hurt. With disappointment. His sharp gaze fell to the floor. "I'm sorry, then."

Without another word, he turned and left the room, bringing his warmth with him.

And just like that, I was alone.