So, I haven't yet told you about my mum's second husband...not Robin. He's actually number 3. When my parents split, we moved to Cheshire, as you know. But what I failed to explain earlier is that we moved there in part because mum had fallen for a man named John. We lived with him in the pub that he owned and operated. I probably never would have even brought him up because he had such a small role in my life, and truth be told, I didn't much care for guy. But today. Today, there was an article in the Mirror, in which he claimed to have been a father to me in my most important years. Bullshit. We stayed with him for three years, and during that time, I was terribly bullied. He never did anything for me. It was almost as bad as my dad saying I needed to man up; when I would come home from school crying and upset, he would wave me away and tell me not to bother him. He and his drunk pub buddies actually laughed at me once. Maybe that is worse than dad. Now, he wants to pretend like he was some loving father. Fuck you! He just wants a piece of the pie, now that he thinks my name is on the rise. Now that my name is tied to yours. I'm sorry. I'm just so angry. 

Well, anyway, when I was 8, John took us to Disneyworld Florida. It was the only time I'd ever been to the States until we moved out here. On this trip to Disneyworld, Gemma and I were so excited to see everything, go on the rides. We'd obviously loved Disney growing up. I mean, we were obsessed. But John didn't like rides and shook his head as we passed them pointing excitedly and asking to ride. He just didn't seem to enjoy much, really, other than footie and beer and mum. In the end, we only went on a few rides, including the fucking monorail from the hotel. The best we went on was Alladin's magic carpet. We spent most of our time at the hotel, not in the park.

And much like your father's "post-divorce guilt trip" to Europe, John's trip to the US was an attempt to win over mum. He always did that. He always tried to use money to influence her. When mum and dad split, mum was really struggling financially. I mean, I've expressed this before. But it was really quite tough. Mum really had to make the pounds stretch. And John, well, he took care of her. Financially anyway. She was dependent on him, and he really seemed to want it that way.

The worst part was, he was only generous with me and Gem when she was around. And sometimes not even then.

When we first got to the park, John was flashing the money around, making a show of buying us souvenirs. But like, when mum was in the loo and I said I was thirsty, he just snapped at me that I was a pest. I had to wait hours for something to drink. And Gemma. Gem will probably kill me for telling you this, but she got her period for the first time while we were at Disneyworld, and she stained her shorts. John griped about having to buy her pants, insisting she should just return to the hotel. By herself. And meet back up with us. Well, of course mum wasn't having that and bought her a new pair of shorts--cute little Mickey Mouse shorts--out of her own money.

God, I'm sorry. I feel like this entry has just turned into a rant session over this prick. He's someone I've not seen or talked about or thought about in years. And now I'm realising that I've been a bit of a hypocrite giving you such a hard time about your dad. He did far worse than my stepdad, and I can totally understand in retrospect why you needed to keep him out of your life. I'm still glad you've found a way to see him, even if you haven't fully let him back in, for your sake and Ty's.

And I think some of what I've outlined here is why mum and John's marriage didn't last. Too often she had to comfort me. Too often she had to tame Gemma's temper. She met Robin while she was still technically married to John, and it was striking, the contrast between the two men. Robin has always been kind and loving. He has always treated mum like an equal partner. He has always made her happy.

I want to make you as happy as he makes her. I will treat you as well as he treats her. I vow to you, Madelyn, that I will be the sort of man you deserve. 

~~~~~

It's fascinating to imagine a whole history for H. I'm having a lot of fun with these flashbacks.

Anyway.... The upcoming chapters are some of their more intense fights... I think you guys will be very interested in Harry's point of view with the airline tickets, for example. And perhaps this little flashback gives us some insight into the sort of issues he has with money.

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