The best way to get over someone is to get under someone else. That's what was going to be Ryan's philosophy from now on. He wasn't sure if it was going to work. But he was damn sure going to try. Brendon was gone for good. And no matter how much he missed him, he wasn't going to be coming back. There was no need to sit around and mope about it. Anybody could cry a river. There was nothing wrong with that. As long as you remembered to also build your bridge and get over it.

And Ryan was in the building bridge mood. He was the Ryan Ross after all. He could have any girl or boy on this campus. He'd had his fun experience with relationships but now it was back to being the person he was best at being.

Which was why he was throwing a Rossmania party tonight. He couldn't remember the last time he'd done that. Everything was set up. Music. Food. Drinks. Party favors. T-shirts. And sluts. This was his welcome back party into the single life and he wasn't going to let it be a dull one.

He also couldn't look dull for the party. Which was why he was with Pete in his usual salon. They sat beside each other as the women worked on their nails. Pete was saying something but Ryan wasn't really paying attention. Probably because he was high out of his fucking mind. He couldn't even remember everything he took today. He did a line when he'd first woken up this morning. He smoked with Gee around lunch time. He couldn't remember if he'd popped a pill before he picked Pete up or if he'd wanted to do it after. Either way, he was mellowed the hell out.

"Are you even listening, dude?" Pete snapped.

"Ye-ah." Ryan smiled.

"You're high out of your mind right now."

"I'm so high." Ryan admitted. Laughing at himself a little.

"You want color?" The woman asked him.

"Why would I want to color? I'm not even supposed to be moving my hands." Ryan rolled his eyes at the idiocy of the lady.

"She's asking if you want a color on your nails, you fucking idiot." Pete told him.

"Oh right." He laughed at himself again. Shaking his head in a weak attempt to clear some of the fog clouding it. "Yeah. I want a mint color."

"You need to slow down, Ryan. You're going to land yourself in the hospital or something." Something being death. But Pete didn't even like to think that, much less say it out loud.

"I'm fine dude. Trust me."

Even if that wasn't true right now, it would be soon. Ryan Ross didn't stay upset for long. Especially not over some guy. He was going to party like it was his last night to live. He was going to get so wasted that he wouldn't even remember Brendon's fucking name. And then things would be back to normal.

*********

Ryan was back to feeling like his old self. In the middle of a party surrounded by people who worshipped the ground he walked on. This was the life he was meant to live. The music was blasting so loud that he could barely hear the boys whispering dirty things into his ears. There was so much smoke filling the house that Ryan couldn't take in a deep breath without getting a little more high. He'd been dancing on the table for so long that his feet were starting to hurt.

But his plan was working. The harder he partied, the more he forgot. The happier he was.

"You want to take this upstairs?" One of the boys who'd been dancing around him for the last fifteen minutes asked.

"Take what upstairs?" Ryan laughed. Looking at the boy with disinterest. He was no where near good enough to get alone time with him. It was bold and stupid for him to even ask.

"Our little party." He tugged at the collar of Ryan's shirt. The accompanying wink just made Ryan laugh harder. Almost spitting his drink in the guy's face.

"You're no where near hot enough for me. Maybe lose the braces, cut the hair and lose a pound or ten."

"You asshole."

He drew back to punch Ryan in the face. But before he could swing he was being yanked off the table top. Ryan looked down and saw Andy dragging the boy by the back of his shirt. He smiled. Andy was always there when he needed him.

"Who wants to take that boy's place?" He yelled to the crowd. They all screamed in response. "You!" He pointed to the shortest girl he saw. "Get your drunk ass up here right now!"

She jumped onto the table and Ryan instantly kissed her. It was sloppy and wet and so unlike his kisses with the boy whose name he'd rather not think.

"Ryan, can I talk to you for a minute?" Pete called out to him.

He pulled his mouth away from the girl's to look down at his best friend. "What's up?"

"Can I talk to you privately?"

"Sure. Sure."

He turned to quickly kiss the boy who was on the other side of him before he jumped down off the table. Pete grabbed his arm. Pulling him towards the bedroom like a child. This was the only room that stayed empty during parties. Only the lucky ones got to enter.

"Are you okay man?" Pete asked, closing the door so no one would wander in.

"What do you mean am I okay? I'm better than okay."

"The guys and I have been a little worried about you."

"I don't get why."

"You're never in class. You haven't gone on campus since we said goodbye. You're high twenty three hours out of every day. You've had sex more times than you've eaten-"

"I'm fine. I'm happy living like I do."

"None of this is going to make you forget Brendon."

That was the first time anyone had dared to say his name out loud to Ryan since he left. It burned a little. Like sticking your hand on the stove. Except it didn't burn his hand. It was his chest that felt like it was on fire.

"I don't care about him. He's gone. He's not coming back. I don't care!"

"You do care! No matter how much you say you don't, you do!"

"You think you know me so well. You're fucking wrong! So how about you stop worrying about me-"

"I have to worry about you, because you're killing yourself dude."

"Well that's my problem." Ryan pushed past him. Opening the door to his solace.

**********

Brendon walked around his small dorm room. It was so different from his first college. No TV. No computer. No big space. No shower in his room. But at least he didn't have a roommate. That meant he could cry alone at night without being judged or questioned.

He had no idea how people could just jump right back into the dating scene after a break up. He'd only dated Ryan for a few month and he couldn't even think about another guy right now. When he told Ryan he was going to love him forever, he meant it. Maybe a miracle would happen and they'd be together again. Or maybe he'd never see him again and he'd have to find somebody else to fall in love with. The thought made his stomach hurt. That was out of the question.

He'd just settle for friends right now. He didn't have any friends in this school yet. But he did have a few people who spoke to him. And he had a job already. At a cafe. Like the one he and his friends would meet up at every morning around the time he first got to college.

The mention of his friends made him miss them even more. He took out his phone -that Ryan bought him - and pressed the Skype app. Patrick's name was the first to pop up. He hit call and waited. Hopefully he was in his room studying and not out with Pete somewhere. His friend answered within seconds. His smiling face made Brendon smile too.

"Hey, Brendon!"

"Hey, Patrick. Are you busy?"

"No. I'm just going over some notes." He panned the camera over his notebook so Brendon could see. "What are you up to?"

"Walking around my room. Wishing I had a TV or something."

"Wow. I didn't know someone could be having a night even more boring than mine."

"Why aren't you out with Pete or something? Or why isn't Pete with you? I'm sure you guys couldn't wait for me to leave so you could finally have sex on my bed."

"What do you mean finally? We did that forever ago."

"Hey!"

"Kidding." Patrick chuckled. "Pete's at a party tonight with-" He adjusted his glasses. "With his friends."

"He's with Ryan?"

"Uh," Patrick looked away from the camera. "Yeah."

"How is he?" Brendon asked. He really wanted to know if Ryan missed him as much as he missed Ryan.

"Good." He answered quickly.

"Has he asked about me? I texted him a couple of days ago and-"

"Ryan is just ... Being Ryan."

"What does that mean?"

"He's back to his old self now, Bren. The guy he was before you dated."

"Like partying?" He asked. Desperately wanting that to be the answer.

"Like partying, drugs, drinking, being with absurd numbers of girls and boys."

"When you say, Being with-"

"Please don't make me say it, Bren."

"It's fine." Brendon forced himself to smile. "I get it."

"I'm sorry-"

"I have to go actually. Lot's of studying to do."

He ended the call before Patrick could speak. Closing his eyes against the hot tears burning them.