Hope you enjoy! Thanks so much for all the love on the last. 🤗❤️ You all were so understanding, I got this for you early.

Chapter 51

"Jessie, you mind helping me over here a second?" Zeke held up one of the tent poles and motioned with his head to the half erected tarp below it.

I rushed over and grabbed the other end.

"Just hold that one so it doesn't come undone."

I did as asked until he secured it. He smiled. "Thanks. This one is old and likes to give me shit." His eyes drifted to the clear water, and he breathed in deep through his nose. "It's been a while since I've been out here." He looked at me. "It's nice."

"It is." I chewed my lip. I'd been burning to ask him about Officer Jones since the man had come out, but until then there'd always been too many people around to bring it up. "Officer Jones came."

He hummed. "Yeah. I knew he was."

I stared at him, hoping he'd elaborate, but he didn't. "How am I not in jail?"

"Why? Did you want to go to jail?" His lips twisted.

"Oh, you know it. Why wouldn't I?" I rolled my eyes. "What I mean is, why? He said he owed you a favor."

Zeke sat down beside the tent, propped his elbows onto his knees, then cut a look up at me. "Yeah, well, that one's a doozy."

He motioned for me to join him, and I did. We both sat and watched as Boe and Parker threw Lexy into the water. The sound of her screech, their laughter. Until Boe's eyes caught mine, and I saw the question there.

I'm an asshole.

I looked away.

Zeke's expression was warm. "There was a riot." He tilted his head over at me, and his smile faded. "He was at the worst place at a worst possible time, and I helped him out of it."

"When you were locked up?" That was suicide. You didn't get involved, especially to help one of the people responsible for putting and keeping inmates inside.

He grimaced. "Yeah, it wasn't the smartest idea I ever had, but it worked out in the end." He playfully shoved my shoulder. "Lucky you."

My lips curved, and I heaved a sigh. "Yeah. Lucky me."

I let my gaze roam.

Fuck me...

Amber stood at the edge of the water in all her eloquent glory. A black bikini far too similar to the one I wore barely covered her perfect, tan skin. She shimmered like fucking gold.

I looked around for Bard, and found him by the coolers. He wasn't even looking at her, but for some reason, the thought of him catching a glimpse made me want to hurry over and cover his eyes.

I forced myself not to.

"I can't tell you how good it feels to see him again," Zeke said.

I looked over at him. "Yeah. I'm sorry I've stolen him from you all. I never meant to burden..."

Zeke waved a hand. "You're not understanding, girl. I ain't seen that boy in years. Not really." His jaw twitched, and he looked away. "I never thought I would again." He paused and clasped his hands together in front of him, then sucked in another lungful of mountain air. "You could never be a burden to me. Not before, definitely not now. I've got a feeling you're the reason he's here."

I shifted under his steady gaze. It was exactly the kind of thing I needed to hear, but my mind wouldn't allow me to accept the compliment. Because it didn't make sense. It didn't fit in with who I was or how I viewed myself. "You give me too much credit."

He grunted.

Scarlet grabbed my hand. "Stealing." She pulled hard, jerked me to my feet, and Zeke waved us off and focused back on the view.

"She is fucking working it. I knew she would."

I rolled my eyes. "She hasn't done anything. It's just a bathing suit." It was the truth. Amber hadn't done a thing to warrant any animosity, and the fact made it that much harder to understand what to do. In prison, in the club, bitches were more blunt. If they liked me, I knew. If they didn't, I knew. If they were being sneaky, it didn't matter because we all knew not to trust each other anyway.

It would be so much easier if she'd just try to shank me already.

But no. Amber looked like a sweet girl with no idea the kinds of thoughts she'd undoubtably caused by her wardrobe choice.

Scarlet gave me a flat look. "That's the kind of thinking that gets you played. Seriously, you should know this."

I pursed my lips and looked back to where Amber now floated in the water. She'd garnered some attention, which wasn't surprising. Parker, thought silent, seemed eager to communicate however he could, and even Boe sat on the edge with his gaze fixed in her direction.

"It's not a competition." I turned back to her. "This whole thing you and Lexy have started feels childish. I didn't sign on to be Miss fucking America. I'm not cut out for it. I couldn't care less about saving the planet, and I don't give a shit who looks better in a fucking swimsuit."

"Hey! The planet is important."

I stared at her.

She snorted. "Okay. Alright." She fought back a grin as she pulled a pack of cigarettes from her pocket and held them out to me.

I took it just to have something in my hand, and my first drag after she fired it up left me lightheaded.

I blew it out slowly. "This is so stupid. I shouldn't be bothered by her."

"But you are." Scarlet took a hit, then picked at her nail. "Because despite the fact that you're a badass, you're still a chick. And that chick over there wants the same big, hairy Sasquatch you–for some strange fucking reason–want." She tilted her head and made a face, then took another drag and huffed it out. "I'm just trying to help."

"Yes. Very helpful," I said, tone dry.

"Jessie. Just wear the fucking bikini."

"Then it looks like I'm trying."

"You are trying."

"I shouldn't be trying. I don't have to try. Bard wants me. I have no reason not to trust him."

"Bard's still a man." Her brows lifted, and she motioned with her eyes to the spot behind me.

I turned and sucked in a breath. Bard stood by the edge of the water, shirt off, talking to the group still wading within.

Amber smiled up as if the sun shone out of his ass.

Mother fucker.

"Fine."

"That a girl." Scarlet's tone sounded far too devious, but I didn't care, because in that moment, I realized...

I feel like I'm hiding.

I pushed my jeans down my legs, then paused at the hem of my shirt. Scarlet didn't know. None of them did. Only Bard had seen the marks I kept hidden away. He'd accepted them. He'd accepted me.

I needed to accept myself.

Then, just like that, it was clear. This was what I needed. Not to outdo Amber. Not to prove myself to her, Bard, or anyone else. I needed to be. To rise above any games, insecurities, or nightmares of the past.

I didn't have perfect, flawless skin. I didn't shimmer like gold. I had thick, black ink, and scars. I had marks and art and pain etched across me like notches on a block wall. Days, weeks, months and years. I'd survived.

I pulled the shirt away, and Scarlet sucked in a breath behind me.

My kept my steps sure, shoulders squared and back straight. I'd expected shame, but there wasn't any. I felt empowered. I reached deep inside myself, down to the person who'd been built by years of hard living and heartache.

Inner Jessie smiled.

Bard cut a look over at my approach and did a double take, and Amber paused and offered me a tight smile.

I smiled back at her. A real one. I looked at her and felt no hate, because I'd been fighting my whole life. Hell, as I stood there, I was fighting. At that very moment, there was a multitude of people dying to get their hands around my throat, relieve me of the breath in my lungs, and make my heart thud it's final beat.

I was prepared to fight them all, but this girl...

I looked down at her.

She's not a threat.

I have enough to fight for.

I will not fight over a man.

If Bard wanted her, he'd have her, and that would be it.

The air felt crisper. My chest lightened, and the anxiety I'd been carrying faded away.

Double upload because I'm the best 😁 That and my kids are busy playing with bubbles lol