Niki

My heart started pounding the second Amaya left, but I kept my composure. I couldn't show him my fear, he didn't deserve to know he made me feel this way. I stared into my abuser's cruel green eyes the way I had countless time before, but this time was different. This time I was stronger and I was angry. This was hard because of how much I loved Landon. We got married so young it felt as though we'd grown up together. He wasn't always this way. He used to be so gentle with me, so loving. I don't know why or how he became this person , I'd given him everything I had, we had a good life. My thoughts started making me sick so I looked away.

"Come with me, we can talk in here." I headed towards my door, not waiting for his answer. It gave me an odd sense of power when I heard his footsteps behind me. This time I was leading and he was following.

Landon didn't say a word until I closed the door behind us. I knew he was trying to be on his best behavior, for some reason, he wanted me back. I didn't understand it, he obviously didn't actually love me. You can't hurt someone the way he's hurt me if you love them. I never got why he tried so hard to get me back just to break me again.

He wasted no time making his move. He was in front of me in seconds. I stood still, unmoving. "I'm sorry I lost my temper, I never meant to hurt you, you know that. I love you so much. I'm just so f***ked up."

I kept my breathing even as he touched my face. "I want you to get help. You can't keep living like this, you're not happy." I felt water forming in the corners of my eyes.

"You help me. You always do." His eyes looked wild as he spoke, making me feel unsteady.

My hands shake a little as he shifts closer to me. "I'm not a therapist, I can't help you the way you need. The best way for me to help you is to get you help from a professional."

He looks confused. "What are you saying?"

"I'm saying you need to work on yourself. You can't do that if you stay here with me." I put my hands under my legs, hiding my fear from Landon. The last part was the hardest to say. "I want a divorce."

Landon stands up, pacing. "Is there someone else?"

I think about Blade, as much as I like him, he wants Amaya. It would never work out. We're meant to be friends and I am starting to accept that. "No. I just can't do this anymore. It hurts too much Landon."

Landon pauses and looks down at me. "You want to leave me?"

I stand up and walk in front of him, willing all my strength. "Yes. I'm done Landon."

"You can't leave me! I won't let you!" He becomes distraught. "I know that I can be a lot to handle, but I'm your husband, you can't just get rid of me because you think I'm defective."

The anger starts to overrule the fear in me. "I will not loose myself trying to save you! You have to save yourself. You don't have a choice, we're done." I take a small breath before I talk again. "If you don't get help, you will go to jail and I will make sure of it." Once I was done talking I was surprised, I'd never threatened Landon before. It was an adrenaline rush.

He looks at me, stunned. It felt good to catch him off guard, to make him fear me. "Okay, if that's what you want, I'll sign the papers. I still love you though, I hope you know that."

"I love you too, but it's over." I bite my lip to stop myself from crying. "I wish you the best, I hope you get the help you need."

Tears starts falling fast from Landon's eyes. "I'm going to miss you, you're all I have left."

I walk over and hug him. "Get help for yourself." I say softly.

He nods into me. "I'm sorry, I'm so sorry." I know he doesn't mean what he's saying, that he's only attempting to manipulate me into taking him back, but it's still nice to hear. I really needed to hear it.

"Don't worry about me, worry about yourself, okay." I loosen my grip on him and move back. It hurts to touch him, there are too many memories between us. I can't afford to think about the good and bad times currently. "You should go."

Landon looks hurt, but heads for the door. "Goodbye Nikayla." I look away, frustrated by his final attempt to convince me to tell him to stay. I don't. I need him to leave.

I swallow hard. "Goodbye, Landon." He walks noiselessly out the door.

I shut the door and instantly fall to my knees. I can't stop the tears from flowing. I put my head into my hands and tears stream down my face like a uncontrolled waterfall. I allow myself to grieve my marriage, to grieve the man I fell in love with. I fell so stupid. I spent so much time in this toxic cycle with Landon, I should've left a long time ago. How could I be fooled by his pretend charm and make believe love for me? I slowly get to my feet and head to the shower, hoping it will wipe the shame and hurt off me. The steaming water does calm me, but the anxiety comes back as soon as I get out of the shower. I start to think about Amaya and Blade. I care so much about both of them, I don't know what I'd do if something bad happened to them. I wish I could've went with Amaya, but I had to talk to Landon before he went anymore off the rails.

Just as I get cleaned up and redressed, I hear a knock on the door. I stand up and run to the door, praying it's Amaya and/or Blade. "Niki are you okay in there?" Amaya's concerned voice comes from the other side of the door. Relief floods through me and I quickly open the door. The first person I see is Amaya.

"You're back! I was so worried." I pull her into a hug. She tightened her arms around me.

I look beside her and see Blade. I run over to him and wrap my arms around him. "I thought something terrible happened to you." I sniffle, fighting back tears yet again.

He looks me in the eyes. "I'm okay, are you?"

I smile at him as convincingly as I can manage. "I'm fine, really." I then went on autopilot and hugged the other man who was with them. I hadn't even realized he was there until my arms were around him. He stiffened up when my body pressed into his. As soon as I realized what I'd done I backed up and apologized. "I'm so sorry, I just got excited. I, umm.." I searched for words.

He pulled me tightly against him, making my heart melt. Who was this incredible guy? "Eh, I'm a hugger." His voice was raspy, which was insanely sexy to me. I decided to get a better look at him. When I saw him, my heart missed a beat. He was the most attractive human I've ever seen. He has black hair and deep brown eyes that bore into mine. I didn't want to step away from him, but I moved back before anyone realized I was checking him out. I played with my hair and faced the crew in front of me. "Please, come in. We have so much to talk about."

Everyone comes in and sits down on the living room couches.

"So, how did things with Landon go?" Amaya puts a hand gently on my arm.

Just as I'm about to answer, the man with the raspy voice speaks. "Who's Landon?"

Amaya and Blade look at me, assessing my demeanor to see what I want to say. I decide there's no reason to hide the truth. "He's my husband."

The man's eyes grow wide. "You're married?"

I shrug. "Yeah, but not for long, we're filing for divorce."

Amaya jumps on me. "No way? Really? Niki, I'm so proud of you!"

I laugh and hug her back. "Thank you. It's so weird, I'm finally going to be free."

"What am I missing?" The handsome man squints at us.

I look over at him. "He's not a good man."

He looks at me sympathetically. "I'm sorry."

I smile and shrug him off. "Thank you, but really I'm okay." I change the subject, everything is too fresh. Plus, I don't want to unleash all my drama on this gorgeous new guy. I'd hate for him to think I'm damaged. "So, what happened with you guys? Blade disappeared for days and came back with a friend."

Blade faces me. "I had to go get this troublemaker." He ruffles the other man's hair as the man swats at his hand. I can tell they know each other well. "I'm sorry for worrying you guys, I didn't get a chance to tell you."

I nod and face the boys. "Are you guys moving in together?" I say, fingers crossed.

"Yeah, for the time being." Blade smiles at me.

I grin at the cute guy sitting by Blade. "Well, then welcome."

"Thank you." He looks at me, full of intensity.

Suddenly, my throat feels dry. "I'm going to get a drink, does anyone want anything?"

"Yes, a glass of wine please." Amaya requests.

Blade debates. "Can I get one too please?"

"Of course." I move my attention the final of the three. "What about you?"

He gets up and walks next to me. "Yeah, but let me help you carry all those."

"Thank you." I say, appreciative.

My nerves soar as the man walks next to me. I take deep breaths, trying to keep my cool.

He grabs four cups out of the cabinet and places them carefully on the counter. "So, you're single?"

My mouth drops. Was he flirting with me? I couldn't tell. "Very. You?"

The man reaches into the fridge and takes out the wine. "Very."

"Look at us go. Being single is a skill." I take the wine out of his hands and start to pour it into the cups carefully. As I grab the bottle out of his hands, our hands brush against each other, sending an electric current through me that almost makes me drop the bottle.

"What great timing, huh?" He moves behind me. "I finally come here the moment we're both single."

This guy was making the first move and it shocked me. I'd always been the one to initiate things in my past relationships. I didn't want to make it too easy, I did just get out of a relationship and I didn't know anything about this guy. "I don't even know your name."

He laughs. "I'm Smasher."

"Is that your full name?" I tease.

"It's what I go by. My real name is Justin but people call me Smasher. " He turns my face to meet his eyes. "You're Niki."

I stare at him, surprised. "How do you know that?"

He grabs the wine and puts it back into the fridge. "I paid attention. Your friend said your name and I made a point to remember it."

"Why would you want remember my name?" I question him.

He walks back to me, cornering me against the kitchen counter. "Because I want to know you." He says in his sexy, raspy voice.

I bite my lip, looking up at him, hoping to make him excited. "We should give them their drinks, they've been patiently waiting for them." I push against him, trying to get past him.

"Okay." He whispered into my ear.

When we walk out to hand the two their drinks, they're snuggling against each other, talking to each other softly. They sit up when they see us. "Ah, thank you! I can't believe it's only been twenty four hours." Amaya stretches and lays her head against Blade's chest. They look so cute I can't help but smile.

"Today's been unbelievable." I say, looking at Smasher.

His face lights up and he keeps his eyes on me, but he doesn't speak.

Blade is staring at Amaya with love in his eyes. "I'm just happy we're all okay. We were all in danger today."

"Yeah, I agree." Amaya yawns. She finishes her drink and sits up. "I'm sorry guys, I'm wiped out. I think I'm going to head out. I'll see you all tomorrow." She stumbles to the door with her eyes half closed.

Blades laughs and stands up. "And I'm going to make sure she makes it to her room."

"Okay, goodnight guys!" I smile and wave at them.

Once they leave, Smasher and I make eye contact. "You didn't use that as an excuse to leave too?" I joke with him.

He leans forward, keeping his eyes on me. "Is that a problem?"

I look at my watch. "Well, it is pretty late."

He comes and sits next to me, I look up at him, confused. "Can I stay for awhile?" His eyes plead with me. "Please?"