It has been one long and painful month since then and I have finally been cleared for full duties. It is a relief as Buck misses me at work. Well, so I've been told. The only problem is I only scraped by in the physical. Still, it feels good to be buttoning up my uniform shirt. It should be a lot of the same old stuff. The same old stuff being COVID calls and the occasional rescue. Now that I am ready for the day I am about to join the others in the rec room when I notice that something is off. It is at that moment I realise that the others are throwing a surprise welcome back party. That is the only reason why I could think of as Buck had to leave early. Buck never leaves early. I shake the thought off as I make my way to the rec area. There is only one way to find out if my hunch is correct.

"Surprise," The others call out as I reach the kitchen. On the table is a cake that has the words welcome back on it.

"Thank you guys but this is overkill. I was only gone for a month," I am flushed with embarrassment. The thing is I am going to have to accept the fact that the others are happy that I am back.

"Well I'm sorry but your replacements have been either insufferable or rubbish or both," Hen speaks up.

"So I've heard. Anyway, we should eat the cake before the signal bell goes," I announce. Just as Bobby moves in to cut the cake the signal bell goes. Of course, it had to. I wish it could have waited till after we had the cake. Oh well, there is nothing that we can do about it. Some days we are jinxed. After seven minutes of driving, we made it to the scene. To my surprise, a car struck a pole. I take note of the lack of skid marks which can only mean one of two things. The passenger lost control due to a medical episode or due to reckless driving. I dash to the driver-side window to find a familiar face.

"Mum, can you hear me?" I get to work on assessing her.

"What happened?" She mumbles. She is not quite responsive. I came to the conclusion that she had a medical episode.

"You were involved in a car accident," I responded.

"I'm sorry Ella. I was on my way to visit you then I blacked out. The next thing I know I am pinned in my car with you checking on me," My mum explains. With that, I notice a medical alert bracelet. With a few swift movements, I put a c-collar around her neck just in case. I doubt there are any major injuries but I want to be safe. Just in case.

"Don't worry about that now. The team will get you out. We will talk on the way to the hospital," I say as I move out of the way. Now that I am out of the way Buck and Eddie get to work on freeing my mum. It is tense but they manage. As they place my mum on the gurney I am hit by a sudden wave of dread. The reason? Well, epilepsy can strike at any time. Thankfully it doesn't take long for us to load her into the ambulance.

"I'll drive. You need the chance to talk to your mum," Hen says as I pull myself up.

"Thank you," I responded before closing the door.

"So how long have you had epilepsy?" I ask as I get to work on making sure she is comfortable.

"Four months ago. It is a side effect of a brain tumour. I meant to tell you when I visited you for Christmas but you were having too much fun. I didn't want to ruin it," My mum explains. She looks embarrassed.

"Well, you told me now," I mustered some fake optimism. To be honest I don't know how I feel. I guess I need time to process the news before I make up my mind. Even though she left when I needed her the most, I still love her.

"Ye...," Before she can finish her response she trails off. She is having another seizure. I quickly grab the recuse spray. As soon as I administer it I move back. I don't want to restrict her twitching. It will hurt her if I do. After the longest ambulance ride, we made it to the hospital. Right now I am talking to the doctor who is looking after her.

"Honestly Miss Calder it is too soon to tell. I'll call you if anything changes," He responded to my question.

"Thank you, Doc," I say as I leave. I feel a little guilty leaving her alone, but I have a shift to get through. It is not going to be fun but there is nothing that I can do about it. After a few minutes, Hen and I made it back to the firehouse. Thankfully the others were waiting for us. We soon dug in. I would be enjoying the welcome back party however I have something else on my mind. After thirty minutes of celebrating my return, everything has gone back to normal and I am waiting for the call from my mum's doctor. I am watching my phone's screen like a hawk.

"Hey, Ella you've been staring at your phone like you're expecting bad news. What's wrong?" Buck asks.

"Well, the woman you pulled from the car was my mum. She has epilepsy as a byproduct of a brain tumour and I know it's not going to be good news," I explain. I don't like being a pessimist but I am aware of the consequences. My biggest concern is if the rescue medication doesn't work. Of course, it is only a matter of time before that happens.

"I can talk to Bobby about getting this shift off for the both of us," Buck responds.

"I know Howie will be happy to take my place but who will fill in for you?" I counter. I don't want to go alone in case something happens. Besides, I don't want to be the person that causes the firehouse to lose another person.

"It doesn't matter. You need someone to be with you," Buck remarks. I hate it when he is right. Before I can do anything my phone rings. It is the doctor.

"I'm sorry Miss Calder there was nothing that we could do," The doctor announces. Of course, I had to be right. I can feel Buck placing his hand on my back. It is a little comforting.

"Thank you for letting me know," I say before I hang up. I freeze. Now that my mum is gone Gavin is the only family member I have by blood. Of course, I have the guys at the 118 but they are my found family. I'm going to have to tell Gavin. I know they weren't on the best of terms since Mum told Gavin the reason why she ran but I know that Gavin will want to know. She is family after all. It has been a week since then and the time has come for the one thing that I was never expecting. Thankfully Buck has stuck by my side. He is the one that has helped me come to terms with what happened. Since it was sudden I didn't know how I felt about it until I talked to him. Right now I am adding the last touches to my simple makeup.

"Gavin, are you ready?" I called out.

"I think so," He responds. He doesn't sound convinced. I quickly joined him. I can tell that he is having second thoughts about going.

"What's wrong?" I ask.

"I'm worried that Mum's family are going to look at me funny," Gavin voices his concerns. He is right. We were never close with them as they never approved of our dad. It was due to his job and the fact that he often worked twenty-four-hour shifts.

"Look, it doesn't matter. We will have each other," I respond. It seems to ease his nerves a little. I glance at Buck who is watching over us.

"Ready?" I ask.

"Ready," Gavin confirms. With that, we head to my car. After twenty minutes of driving, we made it to the church where the funeral is being held. I take a deep breath as I pull up. To my surprise, only a few people are here. Those being our grandparents and our aunty. I brace myself for the oncoming storm.

"That boy shouldn't be here," I catch my aunty whispering.

"Excuse me, Aunty Joe, that Boy has a name and he has every right to be here. He lost his mother," I announced our presence. It has been a couple of hours since then and the time has come for us to leave. We all make a beeline to the car.

"Hey, Buck do you mind if I spend the night with Gavin? I don't want him to feel unloved again," I say remembering the last time that happened.

"Just so long as Gavin is fine with that," Buck responds.

"I'm fine with that," Gavin says. After twenty minutes of driving, we made it home. I grab some clothes and stuff them in my bag. After saying goodbye to Buck I rejoin Gavin in the car. It has been a few hours since then and I am making dinner while watching over Gavin. It is bugging me that we are in this position but it reminds me of the days when my Dad had a double shift. I would give anything to go back to those days. It was a lot easier with Dad around. A sigh falls from my mouth.

"Hey Gavin, why don't you pick a movie then we can watch it while we eat dinner," I suggest as I add the finishing touches to the food.

"Sure. It will be like when Dad was stuck at work," Gavin says as he picks up the TV remote. I dish up two plates of food. Luckily for us, Gavin finds what he wants to watch. We soon settle down to watch. Gavin has picked the first Top Gun movie. As the movie goes on I find myself reflecting on the past month's events. Like so many, I have been through hell. Thankfully I have had people to drag me through. The pain of losing someone will never ease but I know that the pain is what makes you stronger.