APRIL 3, 2016

A short entry coming today, I still am not up to writing but I still feel the need to document all of this madness.

You know, since all this began, since the moment my brother told me what he came across, I have not been able to do anything for me. I haven't been able to have any kind of fun, I haven't done anything I enjoy, I have done absolutely nothing in an attempt to enjoy myself. Sure, how can I? How can I go do something I enjoy? I can't, knowing what I know. I can't with the fact that my brother is missing. With all that is in my life right now, there is absolutely nothing I can do to relax. Will that ever change? Probably not.

Just to say it again, probably not. There may be no chance for there to even be a probably if that makes sense. I am nineteen; I should be out and about getting into the sorts of trouble that regular nineteen-year-olds get into. Anyhow, remember I mentioned being out and about just rambling around a few nights back? There was a face that stood out during my ramble. It was not the face of the son of the man I am supposedly meant kill. It was another face, a different face. He, the owner of that other face was someone else, he is someone else.

Earlier today and right out of nowhere, this guy just appeared. I didn't see him coming. A hand was placed on one of my shoulders. I turned and it was him, just standing there. I didn't know what to do or what to say. I was totally caught off guard. He simply told me that 'it is nearly time', ... nearly time for what? He didn't say. He just turned around and walked away. There is something familiar about him and for some reason or another, I don't want to dwell on that. Let it be what it is until a need may arise for it to be something else.

I wanted to follow him, but something stopped me, something from within me stopped me from following that guy. Who is he? Is he the reason I travel in time? I am not gonna make any guesses. For now, for right now, all I am going to do is try, try my very best to relax, if that is all possible. So, I will leave it at that until next time, if there is a next time.

APRIL 8, 2016

Alright, I know it has been a little while since I last put pen to paper so to speak but there is a reason for that. People are camping out by where I live, yeah people are queuing, waiting as if something is about to happen and these people want to witness it happen. What are they waiting for? Isn't that obvious?

It's strange, in a way it feels as if what is coming has been coming for quite some time and it has at that, but I have only known about it for a matter of weeks. It is what my life has become, and it feels like I have been dealing with it for so much longer than I have. Within this time which feels much longer than what it actually has been, I had yet to find out as to exactly how and as to exactly when I travel into the past. So, do these campers know something I don't?

This is kinda like people camping out by a well-known alien hotspot in the hopes of seeing an UFO for themselves. It's not that easy, is it? Not that catching sight of aliens is something easy or anything of the likes. I was never great at maths though one thing really should be quite clear. I am nineteen now, I will be nineteen in 1996, so I guess whatever is coming it is coming sooner rather than later.

Time travel, it is a difficult thing to believe in. Maybe my time is coming soon and maybe it happens here right where I live and maybe people are here to witness it. All sorts of people are here I'd imagine. There are the believers, people waiting to witness a moment of history, if it can be called that. There are the doubters, those who wanna say 'I told you so' if it doesn't happen, then there probably those who have come along for the ride, just because they have nothing better to do.

How did word get out about what is going on? Maybe it is something which is common knowledge. Am I to become, or am I already a celebrity of sorts? Sort of looks like I already am.

This 'camping out' began three days ago with a couple of tents going up in a nearby field. Any time I went outdoors, the occupants of these tents would come and follow me. I am used to the stares I get and all but being followed, no thanks. Attempts at ditching any such followers only proved to be futile and within those last three days so many more tents and such have gone up, some even right by the garden gates. Now I just stay indoors. Sure, what else can I do?

My parents are surprisingly calm, maybe a little restless but they really do appear calm. Surprisingly they are keeping fairly quiet, maybe a little too quiet. They have been oddly indifferent all alone. Are they waiting on something too? ... expecting something inevitable perhaps. My brother, well there still is no word, he is still missing, and police have no leads, other than me of course. I do not seem to be all so convincing I guess; they still think I am involved somehow in his disappearance. I'd never hurt my brother, never.

My sister was frightened enough as it was and is from before these past few days, now she won't even leave the house to go to school. What can we do? Remember that guy I mentioned before? The guy who told me that 'it is nearly time'? Yeah well, he is outside; I have seen him out there on at least three occasions, so I guess my time really is coming. What is it that he knows?

Oh God, this really is happening. Why me? What did I ever do to deserve all this? I am not a bad person. I may not be a good person, but I am not a bad one either. I want to wake up from this nightmare. Any time now would be good.

I am trying to keep calm, but it is not easy. Trying to think calm thoughts doesn't really do the job. How about this as a calm thought for ya; will I still be able to keep a journal back in the past? There is a thought, pity I am only just thinking of it now. I mentioned before of possibly placing cookies in the past, cookies I could possibly find in the present. What if keeping a diary in the past is one such cookie? It may just be a bit late to try find said cookie now, besides where would I hide it?

Of course, should have thought about it long before now. If I do keep a diary in the past, then I know exactly where I'd hide it. This is if I get that opportunity to hide it at all.