*Meanwhile the preschoolers are sitting down in the middle of the floor taking a test on algebra and geomatry (aka the 5th test of the day for some reason) while Yellow was passed out on the floor with a bottle of opiods on the floor.*

Lapis:..... *cries*

Peridot: Lapis? What's wrong?

Lapis: I CAN'T READ!!!! *whines*

Ruby: Do any of ya'll understand this BS?!?

Sapphire: I agree with Lapis, I can't read-

Spinel: *groans* Ms Yellow I'm ready to go home, I'm tired of takin' all these testes.

Pearl: *doing the test perfectly fine without troubles* Well Spinel, it's not testes. It's 'tests.'

Spinel: No, it's testes.

Pearl: Tests-

Spinel: Alright if you take one what is it called?

Pearl: Test.

Spinel: If you take more than one, what is it called?

Pearl" Tests.

Spinel: It can't be 'test' 'tests' it's 'test' 'testes' Pearl!

Pearl: TESTS!!!

Spinel: TESTES!!

*suddenly the door opens a new teacher comes in, her hair a light pink while her skin pale as stars*

Pink: Hello you little cuties UvU

Spinny: OH MY GOD IT'S THE COTTON CANDY MONSTER!!

*Most of the kids start running around screaming while Pink looks at them confused*

Pink: No no no! It's not what you think!

Steven: Chill guys it's my mom.

Pink: Thanks Stevie

Pink: Where's your teachers?

Spinel: *points at a passed out Yellow* White is gone out to a strip club thinking she's sexy and Blue is at a Mario tournament.

Pink: OK! Well, I'm your sub, Pink!

Spinny: Sub? Oh you're one of those things people ride!

Pink: -

Pink: NO that's a subway-

Amethyst: What's the difference?

Jasper: *rips test to shreds* FUCK THIS!!!

Volley: *rolling weed in her test papers and smoking it*

Pink: YOU DO DRUGS?!?!

Volley: Sure, where's my $50?

Aquamarine: *dumping Pink's things out of her purse and takes her wallet* Volley I'll give you $35 for a pound of weed-

Volley: 45.

Aquarmine: 40-

Volley: Deal.

Pink: Uh, no! What is wrong with you kids?? *takes wallet from Aquamarine but gets kicked in the shin* DARNET!!!

Spinny: Hey Ms. Pink, got any-

Peridot: *hacking into Pink's phone* GUYS LOOK AT THIS SHE HAS MEMESSSS!!!!

Ruby: YASSS!!!!

Pink:...*walks over to Yellow and slghtly kicks her with no movement* Yellow?

Yellow: ....

Pink: *sighs*
***
Pink: Ok! How about we just do a little introduction. Let me go first.*smiles as she sits on the floor* My name is Pink Diamond, and I'm 24 years old. I lovelearning about gems and I'm also Steven's mother.

Spinny: Lucky.

Pink: Now, who wants to go next?

Spinny: *raises hand rapidly* PICK ME PICK ME PICK ME!!!

Spinel: *tryna hide her face* Don't you do it, don't do it-

Pink: I bet the girl with the pigtails would! *points to Spinel*

Spinel: Fuck you-

Ruby: Well this oughta be fun.

Pink: Start with your name, age, and what you like to do!

Spinel: My name's Spinel and I hate all of you. There ya go.

Pink: Ok...how about your age?

Spinel: Well I stole Volley's weed a while ago so I dont know-

Volley: *getting ready to fight* First my eye, now my weed?!?

Sapphire: *holds her back* CALM DOWN VOLLEY! YOU HAVE A WHOLE VALLEY FULL!!

Spinel: Huh...Spinny how old is I'm, I done forgot-

Pearl: Well it's not 'how old is I'm' it's how old are you.

Spinel: No Pearl, now how old is you, how is me-

Pearl: That's not-

Spinel: *groans and rolls eyes* Pearl listen to my lips! How old is me! Is I'm! Ism!!

Pearl and Spinny: You're 4!

Spinel: Well goddamn that's all you have to say!! Hey teacher, I'm 4.

Pink: So you're only a year younger than Steven! I suppose Spinny is your twin?

Spinny: Yup! And by the way, do you have any-

Volley: I'M GONNA KICK YOUR ASS FOR TAKING MY WEED! *jumps on SPinel*

Spinel: Let's roll!

Pink:....

Connie: Why do I feel like Volley's gonna get her ass kicked?

Jasper: Cause she is.

Connie: If that's the case, better get the weed stalks for her funeral.

Volley: OW!!

Pink: SPINEL GET OFF OF HER!!!!!!
***
Pink: *panting from breaking up the fight* Ya know what...I see why Blue and White left. This place is...is...Hades!!

Amethyst: Wow,you don't even swear!

Pink: Of course I d- Why are you eating chalk?

Amethyst: *has green chalk in her mouth* It's nUtRiTiOuS!

Pink:...Alright, recess! I need a break.

Steven: *With Peri, Spinny, SPinel and Volley. Spinel is being held back by Spinny and Volly is being held back by Steven* Volley, just let it go!

Volley: Like hell I will!!! SHE STOLE MY WEED!

Spinel: You're mad over dead grass?!?!

Volley: Its not dead grass, its MEDICATION!!

Spinny: *struggling* Sissy I can't hold you no mores!! *falls back as Spinel gets out of her grip* OOF!

Peridot: *catches her leg* QUIT IT! MS PIIIIINNNNKKKK!!!!!

Pink: wut-

Steven: Volley's boutta get killed!

Bismuth: JERRY JERRY JERRY!

Connie: Yeah! Come on everyone, Volley and Spinel are about to fight!!

Luni: *putting facepaint on Marigold*

Marigold: FIGHT!FIGHT!FIGHT!

Pink: No no no! Don't fight, don't fight! *worried*

Steven: -

Amethyst: *eating chalk outta a popcorn bucket* Yo my money's on Volley, she don't play bout that weed.

*Volley and Spinel escape Steven and Peridot's grips and go at it. Spinel seems to be the winning one in this situation*

Spinny: Sissy! Quit it!

*Spinny tries to pull her sister off of Volley, only to get hit in the eye with her fist*

Connie: Spinny!

Pink: *pulls Volley from under Spinel* What is WRONG with you two?!?! All you've been doing is fight! I don't know you 2 very well, but you need to stop fighting!

Volley: She pulled out my eye with a fucking fork! ANd you're telling me not to beat her ass?!

Spinel: I TRIED TO GIVE HER NEW ONES!

Bismuth: Yeah, she had to kill a grown man.

Pink: Spinel! *points to Spinny, whose silently crying* Do you not see what happens when you resort to violence?! You injured your own sister! Just try to make u-

Spinel: *throws a book at Pink*

Pink: *eye twitches* That's it- That's fuckin' it- Volley give me drugs now!!

Volley: What?

Pink: NOW!

Volley: *hands her a bottle of pills and some cigars* ??

Pink: Now...while I go try to forget how ANNOYING you kids are, you 2 need to make up!! *takes SPinny's hand* Come on sweetie, let's go do something about that eye.

Spinel: Damn what's her problem?

Volley: Hell if I know. That lady needs some serious therapy.

Spinel: Exactly. Hey, wanna go vandalize somethin?

Volley: Sure why not?

Lapis: Hol up, back the truck up! YA'll are good now??

Volley: I guess, who cares? I wanna go vandalize that strip club White went to.

Spinel: Not until we spray paint Pink's car! Steven, come show us which ones your moms.

Steven: Aight!

Bismuth:...what just happened?

Marigold: Life. Come on Luni, come help me paint Yellow's face!

Luni: *grins mischeivously and holds up paints*
***
*Meanwhile Pink puts an ice bag over Spinny's bruised eye*

Pink: There... Just in time too, it's time to go!

Spinny:....

Pink: Spinny?

Spinny: *starts crying silently*

Pink: Sweetie what's wrong? I'll be back again sometime!

Spinny: N-no...all throughout the day I was tryna ask you for some maple syrups...AND YOU IGNORED ME!!!!

Pink:...*hugs Spinny* You poor poor child...
......................
Don't worry Spinny, you'll get your maple syrups one day.