I AM curious. I wouldn't deny that. I'm quite sure I am everything of the word and gradually, it killed the cat. It reminded me of something I thought to have been eternally buried only to discover the surprise of it constantly breathing. Yes, at the first moment of our 'lovers' encounter, I was thinking of another. I was thinking of the promise I made which I gambled my life and soul with. I was thinking of the girl who was supposed to hand me to Death but entrusted me with a longer life instead.

"We're here," I remember her telling me this when we finally find refuge in a humble abode. It wasn't too far from the manor, but far enough for the hunters to abandon their hunt for a while.

Pinagmasdan ko ang kabuuan ng bahay na ni disenteng bumbilya ay wala. Nababalutan ang bawat piraso ng furniture ng puting tela habang niyayakap na ng dumi't alikabok ang ibang kagamitan. Sa ibabaw ng coffee table sa may sala ay nagkakanlo ang notice na 'For Sale,' halatang niyurak at binaklas sa pagkakapaskil sa labas.

"Bakit tayo nandito?" nababahala kong tanong. "Nagsinungaling ka ba sa 'kin? With what I'm seeing, this is probably a good place to be my resting place right now."

Pero napaka-ipokrito ko. Imbes na umatras at abangan ang posibleng balya ng kapahamakan, mas humigpit lamang ang kapit ko sa kamay niya. "Nagbago na ba ang isip mo?" Napalunok ako. "Are you going to kill me here then?"

Matapos matakasan ang sunud-sunod na banta ng kamatayan, hindi ko maiwasang pagdudahan na ang bawat bagay. Kung tutuusin, ang pagsama sa taong kanina'y handa akong patayin ay isang kabaliwan. Pero heto ako, nakapulupot maging ang mga daliri sa kamay ng parehong tao na 'yon. Siguro nga, nababaliw na 'ko, ngunit kung maililigtas ako ng kabaliwang ito, sige, tatanggapin kong baliw na 'ko.

"Don't get any wrong ideas," matawa-tawa nitong tugon. "I'm not someone who's easily swayed. To tell you the truth, it took me a decade before I can even decide something like this on my own."

Kakatwa. Kaninang nasa labas kami at bukas sa kahit anong peligro, ni hindi nagtaas-baba ang mga balikat niya o dibdib. Subalit ngayong naririto kami, ligtas at walang ibang tao liban sa amin, hindi siya mapakali.

"A-Are you okay?" I squeezed our hands tighter, attempting to extend whatever comfort I could provide to her. "Why don't we sit f—"

"Your great-grandmother, your last relative, Madame Vassily, is going to be here soon. She has reinforcements with her to safely get you out of here and to collect your parents' bodies. The police will reach the Wisteria Manor in two hours once they receive the scheduled email I sent."

Agad akong napamaang at napakurap sa pagputol niya sa 'kin. "Ano?"

At bagama't napakahigpit ng hawak ko sa kamay niya, ang sa kaniya nama'y tila walang lakas at mga daliri niya'y nakalapat na. Parang wala nang enerhiya. Parang wala nang pag-asa. Nagugulumihanan kong tiningnan 'yon... Ang sabi niya sa 'kin ay hindi siya tatalikod sa pangako niya pero ang kamay niya, para na akong sinusukuan.

She turned to me with the rainwater still dripping from the ends of her long red hair. "I sent an anonymous tip to your grandmother's office that you survived, and that you're here, unscathed," she explained, her face surprisingly unreadable compared to before.

Napaawang ang bibig ko sandali, pilit iniintindi ang mensaheng hindi niya diretsang pinaparating. "Y-Yes, that's good news, but why are you speaking as if I'm the only one leaving this place?"

"Because you are," she pursed her lips and nodded lightly. But she wasn't nodding as an act to convince me. She's convincing herself. She's convincing herself that this is the right choice to make. "You don't need me with you, Caesar Montelier. I'm supposed to be your assassin, remember?"

"What are you talking about?" I frowned, bewildered at how she decided on that without asking me first and how genuinely serious she is about it. "I told you I'm going to marry you. How can a groom leave without his bride?"

"You only said those because you want your life spared," she insisted, her hand still lifeless on my most enthusiastic touch. "I'm sure you don't have any business with someone like me. Even if you do, I'm not worth it. We're too... different."

Bumuntong-hininga siya, may ngiti't tila walang pinagsisisihan sa mga sinalita niya. Batid ko 'yon. Nakita ko 'yon. Gayunpaman, hindi ako umimik at tinitigan siya na animo'y naghihintay na bawiin niya ang mga katagang 'yon. Umasa akong biro lang 'yon. Umasa akong hindi talaga 'yon ang nasa isipan niya. Kasi nangako na 'ko, 'di ba? Nangako na 'ko, at handa akong panindigan 'yon.

"You don't know that..." I murmured, shaking my head in refusal.

But she only smiled wider, a sigh of relief slipping from her chapped lips. "You don't know that either."

Para akong nanlupaypay nang ibinalik niya sa 'kin mismo ang argumento ko. Para bang sinasabi niya sa 'kin na hanggang dito lang kami maidadala ng pangako ko. Na kesyo 'tama na, ayos na, hahayaan kitang mabuhay kaya hindi mo na kailangang tuparin 'yon.' At kahit na ba hindi ito ang mga eksaktong salitang nanggaling sa bibig niya, klarong ito ang pinahihiwatig niya.

"Don't you trust me?" I inquired, my voice trembling. "If it's about my family's associates, they won't dare hurt you if I tell them you saved me."

Napahagikgik naman ito sa pagbuhat ko ng tiwala bilang paksa. "Caesar, if there's someone else in this world who is as trustworthy as you, I wouldn't be making this decision," aniya at muling ipinatag ang kurba ng mga labi niya. "I can't come with you because you're quite rare. I can't let you be in danger because of me. If I let you so, it'd be similar to stealing one of the remaining several lights in the world."

Sa mataman niyang paliwanag, napagtanto ko... Ang hindi ko maamin na pagpipilit na hindi kumalas sa kaniya at ang panay kong pakikipagtigasan upang hindi niya ako hayaang umalis mag-isa, lahat ng 'yon ay nagmumula sa pagnanais ko na huwag siyang maglaho kagaya ng iba. Bakit kung kailan may magagawa na kong maprotektahan, bakit mawawala pa ang pagkakataon na parang bula?

"How can you even consider me as something great like that? I'm not like that. I'm a Montelier who failed to protect everything that is precious to me. You've seen it," naiiling kong turan sa kaniya. "I wasn't able to do anything earlier so let me do the one thing I might be able to successfully accomplish. Come with me and let me provide for you. Let me protect you as you did to me."

I watched how her brows melted with my pleas. I never once imagined myself begging someone to stay with me, but I guess it's what happens when life takes so much from you. Even so, she shook her head, opposing every word with her starry eyes, and it makes me angrier to see how much she believed in me when I can barely do so myself.

"What's lost is lost. However, losing doesn't mean failing. Sometimes, you have to lose one battle to win the war." Kinulob niya sa dalawa niyang mga kamay ang akin at iniangat ito. "There are still far more challenges ahead of you and it would kill me if I were to become one of those. I don't want to be a stumbling block on your path. You might've lost everything but you gained me. You still have me. Now and always," she reassured me.

My skin shivered at that very second. I'm certain that it isn't because of the rain or the thunders but because of the cold she planted at the back of my hand through her lips.

"That is why..." Gumasgas ang mga labi niya sa balat ko. "Be a Montelier who can take everything back. Be prepared for what the future has stored for you. And once you're ready..." she paused, her hands shaking as they cling to mine. It's almost as if she sees my hand as a rope that any drowning man would grab to survive.

"Once you're ready, once you're the Montelier you want to be, find me. I'll be waiting. I'll just be right behind you... like the moon who'd be there to guide you everywhere, like a shadow that'll follow you every day."

Hanggang ngayon na halos isang dekada na ang nakalilipas, sumasagi pa rin sa 'kin ang palaisipan ng kung bakit hindi siya sumama kung kailan may pagkakataon siya. Gusto ko noon ipagdiinan na kaya kong maging Montelier na nais ko habang nasa puder ko siya subalit sa isang banda, tiyak kong tatanggi pa rin siya.

But... what now, my savior? Where are you when I'm now the Montelier I wanted to be? You told me you'll wait for me but how could I find you when you never left anything but promises to me?

"Pssst!"

Nahila ang atensyon ko nang mapansin ang pagkalakas-lakas na sitsit. Naturally, I can't avoid searching where it came from and so, I scanned the bustling city streets for a probable source. As much as I tried, though, what I only discovered is Quinzel de Agustin disappearing from my side again. Yes, again. The last minute she's gone, she's staring at the man giving out balloons to toddlers and kids.

"Haaa. Where is she this time?" natanong ko na lang ang sarili ko't napahilamos ng palad.

"Pssst!"

Damn it. Saan ba nanggagaling 'yon—

And there she is, sliding herself into the crowd surrounding a certain stand. Since she's taller than most women and people even, she's quite easy to spot on. But seriously, can you imagine a 5'6 tall woman, who I must add just dealt with armed assassins single-handedly a few hours ago, waving at you excitedly like a five-year-old because she wants you to buy her something?

As if it can't get any more ridiculous, I found her drooling for fishballs...

"Hindi ka ba pinapakain ng pulis na 'yon?" nakataas ang kilay kong tanong sa kaniya nang sa wakas ay nakalapit na kami sa mismong tusok-tusok.

While I'm waiting for a humorous answer or perhaps, one that will defend his former caretaker, Quinzel only looked at me with confusion. "I mean, kahit kailan ba hindi ka niya binilhan ng pugo't fishball?" paglilinaw ko at parang may suminding bumbilya sa tabi niya nang pangalanan ko ang mga pagkaing halos tunawin niya sa titig niya.

She hasn't tried it before? She didn't know what they are called?

"Aish." I clicked my tongue in defeat and started to reach for my pockets. "Manong, pabili nga pong sampung pisong pugo, limam pisong fishball, at limam pisong kikiam," ani ko sa may ka-edaran nang lalaki na naghahalo ng tusok-tusok sa malaking kawali ng mantika.

Masigla naman nitong tinanggap ang papel na bente pesos na inabot ko at saka kumuha ng isang transparent na plastic cup sa isang tabi. Nang makumpleto na nito ang binayaran namin, kinuha ko ito mula sa tindero bago pa mahawakan ni Quinzel.

And to my astonishment, she's obviously offended by it given her pout and how her eyes are following the cup and the food cramped inside it. Cute.

"Mainit kaya sandali lang," natatawa kong ani sa kanya at tinapik ang dulo ng ilong niya. "Baka matapon mo pa kung hahablutin mo nang bara-bara sa katawan ng baso." Pinuslit ko ang panyong maryoon ako mula sa bulsa. Niladlad ko ito at ipinaikot sa baso nang sa gayon ay hindi siya mapapaso. It goes without saying that I did rush, as Quinzel's eyes seem to narrow further as time runs.

"Eat slowly," I reminded her sternly when I finally gave the cup to her. Her shoulders dropped low when she got a closer look at it, however, for a reason I didn't expect she'd be upset and teary-eyed with.

"Pahingi nga." At kinuha ko ang stick na inilagay na ni manong sa baso. Tumusok na rin ako ng isang pugo sa ibabaw nang sa ganoon ay hindi mawalan ng saysay ang stick na hawak-hawak niya.

"Ah, wait. Hindi pa pala natin nalagyan ng sauce," naalala ko't pinigilan ko muna siyang tumusok.

"Sauce?"

"Hmm. Matamis, maanghang, o suka lang?" Lumapit ako sa hilera ng mga sawsawan, hinihintay ang tugon niya. Fortunately, I didn't have to explain each sauce for her to decide and she ended up pointing at the sweet-flavored one.

At least she's aware enough kung nasaan ang sawsawan ng sandok sa hindi.

Nang mabudburan ko na ng sauce ang pagkain na ikinasitsit pa niya sa 'kin na para ba niya kong aso at nang ginawa na rin niya akong tagabuhat ng palamig, umalis na kami sa kumpol ng mga tao at bumalik sa paglalakad. Kani-kanina lang ako nagpadala ng mensahe kina Cortez kaya may iilang minuto pa kami magliwaliw bago nila kami sunduin. Salamat sa mga damit na nakuha namin mula sa mag-asawang may-ari ng inn, mukha lang kaming mga taga-rito na napagtrip-an na kumain sa tabi-tabi.

The same idea is more refreshingly pronounced in Quinzel, whose cheeks turn round and puffy as she chews her treats. "Magkakasundo kayo panigurado ni Ethan. Pareho kayong lumolobo ang mga pisngi sa dami ng kinakain," aliw na komento ko kasabay ng pagkurot ko sa kanang pisngi niya.

"Hmpf. Sino bang bumili nito?" Annoyed, she pulled her now pinkish cheeks from my grasp.

I smirked when she argued back. "Well, I just hope na hindi ka babalimbing sa mga kaaway kapag nilatagan ka nila ng isang lamesa ng pagkain."

Kumunot ang noo ni Quinzel at napahinto. "Don't get any wrong ideas," she said as she adorably stomps her feet.

"About what?" I teased as I provokingly poked her cheeks.

"I'm not someone who's easily swayed. For your information, it took me a decade before I can even decide something like this on my own."

******

A/N: Hi, kung naguguluhan man kayo, these chapters ay mga nangyari sa pagitan ng POV ni Quinzel. That means ito 'yong mga ganap na hindi niya na-kwento kasi focused siya sa mga possible threat sa buhay ni Caesar. Kumbaga, whilst worrying, Caesar is actually seeing every detail of their encounters and interactions. Bakit hindi ganoon si Quin? That's because she's taking Caesar's safety as top priority since hindi alam ni Caesar ang panganib na naghihintay sa kaniya. Again, Caesar will fill the gaps. :> Sorry sa late update, btw. Lamig ng panahon ihhh. xoxo