☆Sammie's POV☆

Take everything I have, but let them be safe.

Sammie felt herself fall, the air hit her face. Wasn't a few hours ago, she wished for her own death? Looks like wishes do come true.

Angela, Alex, Melissa.. I'm so sorry. At least, now you're safe.

Yellow flashing lights caused her to shut her eyes. They always said you'd see the light, but did it have to be so damn bright? She smelled smoke, but was unsure where it was coming from.

Opening her eyes, she sees Samuel was only a few feet away. With a great effort, Sammie crawled over to him. It was hard, since she was tangled in yellow vines. Is this what caught them? His vines?

Sounds were happening, voices from way high up, but that bit of her mind hadn't caught up with the rest of her quite yet. Samuel was burnt, frozen, and had a shot wound in his arm. How did he survive all this? Was it magic keeping him alive?

Sammie reached out, trembling, unsure what exactly she meant to do. Some part of her wanted to beat his head into a pulp with her bare hands. But that part wasn't in control.

Gently, she cradled Samuel's face in her hands. Sammie never felt so happy, or so heartbroken. She desperately wished this whole thing was just a dream.

That she could just wake up at any moment. She'd go tell Angela, Samuel, Alex, and Melissa about it. They'd joke, and tell her to stop watching too many movie. But they'd all be okay.

Samuel stirred, nuzzling his face against her palms. "You n-never change, do you?" He rasped, blinking up at Sammie with eyes full of tears. She didn't even think he could cry. It could be just the smoke though. "Looks like you hit your magical peak."

"You're gonna be okay," Sammie coughed, at a loss for anything else to say. She didn't want him to be okay, but she didn't want him to die, either. Her vision was blurry, and she felt like she was gonna pass out at any moment. She had no magic, she realized. Even if she did, she couldn't kill him.

Samuel chuckled, he smiled at her. "Oh, I wouldn't worry about that, friend. It's finally over." He sighed contentedly. "I wasn't expecting this, but it was so worth it. Haven't had this much fun in ages..."

"I'm sorry." It was an effort to form the words, push them out past her teeth. Everything tingled, unreal and distant. Her eyes were closing on her, and the smell of smoke was suffocating.

"Don't be! I'm so proud of you, Sammie," he said, voice gurgling. "You finally are strong enough to live. No one is going to kill you like Ann-"

Samuel started to cough, Sammie was also finding it hard to breathe. Where was all this smoke coming from?

Sammie shook her head, frowning. "I can't heal you." Didn't he know she lost the goop? Was he delirious? Could the goop even heal him as bad as he was? She stared down at his head in her hands, hands that felt like someone else's hands.

Samuel twitched. "I just had to make you guys strong. Mary and Frances were too weak, but you..heh..you're the real deal."

He chuckled weakly, his eyes closed.

Shivering with exhaustion and a wrongness she couldn't place, Sammie said nothing. Closing her eyes, she felt her head dip onto his chest. She wanted to end the laughter, to end him...but only for an instant.

That feeling was gone, but the memory of that feeling, not rage but a cold wanting, would linger. She felt like she could kill him, if she could just open her eyes.

If she could only open..

☆☆☆☆☆☆☆Samuel's POV☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆

Samuel realized he'd been a little too..careless.

Overconfident, like always. He hadn't needed to be careful in so long. Mary was hardly ever a threat, only using magic to show off. Frances, though willing to kill, was too weak to harm him. They never held any real threat. He hadn't had any reason to think he was in real danger in so long. He usually won his fights, never had to worry about losing. But now, he'd actually lost! What a turn of events.

Now he was helpless to do anything but wait for the inevitable as the raw magic burned the rest of his life away. He had no magic left, using the last of it to catch both Sammie and himself. Sure, he could have just saved himself, let her fall.

He couldn't bring himself to let her fall, no matter how much magic it could have save him. Sammie was his favorite, he couldn't just let her die..

Samuel knew he'd never make it past the ride to the hospital. He couldn't even make it to getting to the ambulance. He should have been ready to run the moment Angela showed up. He should have been ready to abandon this whole thing the moment cops showed up.

Samuel could gotten away with it, could have left town, and everyone behind. Yet he couldn't. It wasn't clear to him before why he couldn't, but now he knew the real reason he refused to leave. The real reason was...

Sammie's teary face leaned closer to his face, so close. She couldn't stay mad at him, even after all that. She truly was too innocent. Too weak. Heh, he couldn't call her weak anymore. She just proved herself to be a true monster hunter. Truly powerful, and threatening.

Death should be scaring him, make him feel desperate to live. Not this time.

No, not this time. Being held up by Sammie was ..nice. No hard feelings between them. Never any hard feelings with Sammie. Yet another reason why he loved her.

Samuel nuzzled into the hands that held his face out off the ground. Sammie...

His favorite person in the world.

Samuel let out a weak cough, the smoke was tickling the back of his throat. He should get away now, before he waited too long and died.

Samuel was so comfy right where he was, though. Samuel couldn't feel pain, (or well, he was amazing at ignoring it) but a sort of drowsy lightness stole over him. He didn't really want to do anything but lie there and admire those eyes.

Those big, soft, brown eyes.

He should really get up. And he would get up!

In...just a moment...

∆∆∆∆∆∆∆∆∆∆Sammie's POV∆∆∆∆∆∆∆∆∆∆∆∆

Sammie nuzzled downwards. It was warm, hot actually. She could almost hear them say her name, but she was so tired..

Sweetheart, you have to move..

Sammie sat up suddenly, her body ached but suspiciously wasn't as bad off as it was before she jumped off the bluff. A small, cold something was in her hand, she pushed it in her pocket. Coughing, she forced herself to moving. She had to find Alex, or Angela.

The smoke was all around her making it hard to see where she was going, but she could hear distant shouting. She crouch on the ground, crawling at a slow pace. It wasn't like she was hurt, but she was too tired to move at faster pace.

She glanced back, her eyes unable to make out Samuel body on the ground behind her. She should just go back and finish him off.

You selfish, self-righteous bitch!

She should ruin him, just like he ruin her. It was only fair to return the favor, right? Destroy his soul as he did to hers.

We kill her after, and bury her. I won't snitch. No harm done!

He wanted to kill her family. Her friends. Everyone. She should just go back and..

That was pretty badass. Not a peep!

...kill him. Make sure that he is stopped for good.

Stick with me, and we could rule this world, kid.

Sammie headed back towards him, her eyes teary. She was no longer sure if it was due to the smoke, or the idea of ending his life. Ending any life..

You're my favorite. Always have been.

She kept crawling, ignoring the tears sliding down her cheeks. He left her no choice. She had no choice but to kill him...but there's always a choice!

I guess it's not all bad. At least I have you..

Before she could convince herself against it, against doing the very thing she's been trained to do for a month, she lit the grass by her on fire. She already was low on magic (energy? Were they the same?) using her only magic left. Using the last of her magic, of her every soul, left her feeling empty.

It felt similar to trying to keep exhaling when haven't inhaled yet. When you just can't anymore. She moved as quickly as her body let her to avoid burning along with the grass..

..and him.

He deserves it.. Right? Still, it took all her self control not to rush back to bring him with her. Not that she had the energy to. Why was she so willing to save him after all he's done? She pretended it was her pacifism talking, though by now she knew it wasn't.

Loud shouting distracted her. Angela's voice was to her...left? No, her right. Sammie looked around, but with all the smoke she didn't know where she was going.

Sammie debated again on going back to find him, or move forward. She opt to finding Angela. Last she saw of Samuel he was unconscious. She didn't get a good look but she assumed he was either dead or sleeping. Come to think of it, Sammie was feeling very sleepy herself.

"Sammie! Say something!" Angela's voice rang out.

"An-" Sammie started, only to end up coughing loudly. It was hard to speak in the smoke, but she tried again. "Sissy!"

"Sam!" A voice behind her yelled. Out of nowhere, Sammie was being pulled by her good arm. Angela grabbed her in a hug, her breathing coming out shallow weepy gasps.

"Crap, no time for tears. Let head back." Angela said as she shakily took in another gasp of air, leading the way. Her hand on Sammie's arm didn't move.

The smoke was clearing, and suddenly the reason why hit her. A fire truck was by the camp site road, it seems Sammie caused the fire during their fight with Samuel. Speaking of..

"He's still back there!" Sammie yelled at Angela, her voice cracking. Second thoughts of leaving Samuel resurfacing, unwilling to go back down. Now that her mind cleared up, she wasn't so sure of her choices. Sending Samiel to jail wasn't completely a bad idea.

"Can't do shit until the fires out." Angela shook her head, her voice pissed. "I want to put a few more holes in him but you fucking jumped with him off a damn cliff!"

They got to the camp site where Alex, the other two officers and a group of firefighters were. Alex look tired but no worse for wear. The moment his eyes landed on Sammie he seemed to perk up. She smiled at him, even if she felt like she was going to throw up.

"Wait, how did you not break any bones from that fall? It had to have been at least 50 feet up!" Angela questioned loudly, readjusting her hair in a ponytail. Her brown eyes never once leaving Sammie.

"That's what I'd like to know," Alex said, moving towards Sammie with a limp. One of the officers stepped forward to help him walk. The officer's tag read Deputy Carlos Murray. Sammie smiled at him as he held Alex up.

"I think we should get back to town first," Carlos stated, his voice tremulous. "No offense, but you guys aren't exactly the picture of health."

Sammie snickered. She took a step, but her legs gave out, sending her back to the ground with a hard jolt. The adrenaline that carried her through everything finally wore off, leaving her in extreme pain.

"Ow!" She cried, but the shock was already fading, and the pain of her awkward landing felt distant. The switch from numb to pain to numb again left her even more tired than before.

Alex pushed away from Carlos to lurch clumsily to her side. "Samantha!"

"Sis, are you okay?" Angela knelt down, her face fearful. Sammie never knew Angela was capable of such a fearful face, but that's ridiculous. Of course she was. Angela felt fear like everyone else.

"I don't think..." Sammie heaved a breath. There was no smoke here, but it was still hard to talk. "I can't stand up."

She couldn't even feel her legs, but she didn't want to alarm anyone by telling them that. Hollow and without magic. She just needed time to heal. She looked up at Alex, who was gripping her right hand tightly in both of his own. They were strangely clammy.

Sammie scowled. "Why are you all sweaty?"

Alex barked a short, nervous laugh. "You don't look so hot yourself, babe. Heh." The lights of his hazel eyes blazed with anxiety. "Look like the walking dead- Hey!"

Sammie's eyes opened suddenly, only to close again. She felt so hollow, like there was literally nothing left in her soul.

She felt like an empty glass cup, breaking bit by bit until..

As much as death should have scared her, the look on Alex's and Angela's face was what really made her worried. They fussed over her, and Carlo ran to get the medic. That was a little confusing, but it felt so nice to have them not fight anymore. She felt so light.

"Hey," Alex said, squeezing her hand. "You gotta stay awake, okay?" He smiled, but it didn't reach his eyes.

"But I'm tired," Sammie said, her voice weak. "Let me sleep, I mean, you do it all the time."

Alex's face said it all, she was dying. She'd used up all of her magic, all of her soul. Her body couldn't take it anymore. Her breathing came out ..wrong. Too shallow and too slow.

"That's because I'm a lazy piece of shit, you're stronger. You always have been." Alex laughed, tears rolling down his cheeks. "And you're gonna keep being stronger, so please ..don't die on me."

Sammie couldn't say anything, she felt someone holding her. Angela's crying face came into view. No.. Angela.. don't cry. "Ange-"

"Shhh, save your strength." Angela said quietly, something Sammie hadn't really heard before. Her voice was usually full of energy and passion. Why was it so soft now? It scared Sammie even more to have Angela so soft spoken now.

Sammie was dying, but her loved ones were safe. She couldn't complain about what it took to keep them safe. It's all she had ever wanted..

She wasn't scared, she was disappointed. She almost won against the bad guy. Wasn't hard to think of Samuel as evil, and yet..

"It's over now, so you...you can't leave, ok? Don't leave. Don't leave me here. I can't lose you, too." Alex whispered.

Everything was fading in and out. Blurring. It would be easy to relax into that blur, to just drift off to sleep.

Samuel's prediction echoed back to her and she knew, with knife-sharp clarity, that it would come true.

You have to keep getting out of bed, she wanted to say. You have to keep leaving the house and talking to people and living, please. Don't just give up like I did..

Too many words, and she was so tired.

But she couldn't leave Alex all alone.
She couldn't leave Angela with no other family. She couldn't leave Melissa thinking that she hated her. Everyone had been so worried about her. She needed to make it up to them. She didn't want to die. Even if she wished for it at one point.

It was happening so fast.

"Come with us, well protect you." Roseus whispered.

"We will be together forever." Flavus beckoned.

"Let us stay here, safe and sound, forever." Purpureus sang.

Safe..

"Yes, safe." Sammie whispered. She could feel himself being torn apart, but she did nothing to stop it.

Stay with me, another soul whispered. This one wasn't one of the three souls. Yet she knew who it was. It was her soulmate..

She let the magic that she has always resented, be the pathway to her family.

She could chose live, or she could chose to leave.

She chose to...

∆∆∆∆∆∆∆∆∆Melissa's POV∆∆∆∆∆∆∆∆∆∆∆

The flashes of light stopped, and the forest was dark once more. That was either good, or extremely bad.

Melissa's cell phone rang, the ending theme to Blood Blockade Battlefront. Angela's ringtone. Melissa could have wept tears of relief, but she was proud of herself when she kept it together.

Over the next couple hours, the search parties trickled back into town. Angela and her search party were the last to return. All of them moved sluggishly, but Angela and Alex were worst off. Straining her eyes, Melissa could see that Alex had an arm slung over Angela's shoulders, both of their faces dirty but smiling.

A smile spread on Melissa's face. She'd been worried, but Angela was top in her unit for a reason. With a soft woof, a dog ran up to meet the returning search party, it was followed by Ben. He seemed both nosy and concerned.

Wait, where was Sammie? She'd assumed that they were smiling because they found her, but it was clear now she wasn't with them. Maybe she had to be taken by ambulance? If so that would mean she was headed to Saint Leina.

Alex passed by her, a small still played on his lips. After nodding at her, he kept walking after Carlos to a patrol car.

Angela was pale, and she was puffing like she'd just run a marathon. Melissa approached her hesitantly. Angela paused to scoop her off her feet in a brief, tight hug. She set Melissa back down, digging a small object from a pouch at her hip and placed it on a nearby patio table.

What was it? Melissa idly wondered. An almost empty glass jar, with a tiny bit of pink stuck to the bottom. Where did she-?

All thoughts, however, were swiped clean as Angela kissed her. She was safe after another day of work, and that's all Melissa could wish for.

∆∆∆∆∆∆∆∆∆∆Sammie's POV∆∆∆∆∆∆∆∆∆∆

Her eyes slowly adjusted to the dark room. It was a room she had never been in before. Was she at the hospital? Maybe Saint Leina? There was the murmur of a TV at low volume.

Blinking, confused, Sammie felt herself to check if she was okay. Two arms, two legs, her head was still attached. Everything was present and accounted for, and hurting.

She was alive.

She was alive, and in the hospital. She hated the hospital, but she never saw such a lovely sight in her life. Someone had tried to make it comfortable with every pillow and blanket possible, but it was still cold.

Alex was curled up at the other side of the room on a the other bed, snoring softly. If she'd had the energy, Sammie could have cried. She was safe. They were all safe.

A table right under where TV was was full of vases of flowers, and stuffed animals. All with "Get Well Soon" cards.

Melissa was startled from her seat right beside Sammie. Her eyes scanned Sammie over to see if she was hurting.

"You're awake," Melissa whispered, squinting as she studied her in the dim light from the TV. "How do you feel?"

"Like shit, but I'm alive. So I can't really complain." Sammie croaked, her voice was raspy. "Where Samuel?"

Melissa was probably thinking that Sammie asked out of fear, which wasn't entirely false. Everything after the fight was hazy. She didn't even remember being in an ambulance, much less the fire or where Samuel was.

Melissa frowned. "He died during the fire. They found his body badly burnt up, horribly unrecognizable."

"Really?" Sammie wasn't sure why that information was this upsetting. It felt like her heart physically hurt from this knowledge. She chalked it up to remorse for killing a person, but she knew that wasn't the real reason.

The real reason was...

"Yeah," Melissa said. "I was starting to think we'd lose you, too, but you woke up on your own, so that's good!"

"I can't believe I killed him," Sammie closed her eyes. It felt like it wasn't true, that any minute Samuel was bust through the door. She was both sad, and happy that he'd never show up again.

She missed him.

Melissa gave Sammie a smile that was a touch too wide. Melissa was safe from Samuel now, at least. "It not like you had a choice, it was self defense."

Sammie was so tired that she found herself dozing off. She wasn't even aware of Melissa's hand on her arm until now.

"What time is it?"

"A little after three. It's Tuesday."

It was an effort to keep her voice down. She didn't want to wake Alex. "I've been asleep for two days?"

Two days! That was ridiculous. She in no way could even begin to explain this at work. Man, she was screwed. Oh well, then again the whole town probably heard of this by now. She had to go see Angela, she hasn't seen if Angela was okay yet.

Every inch of her body disagreed with her, and wasn't shy about letting her know. The sharp pain made it impossible to even think of standing at the moment, and she was so utterly drained it was an effort just to sit upright. She'd have to avoid brushes with death in the future.

Two days. Two fucking days since...

Everyone was still fine. Everyone was alive, minus him. She didn't want to think of anything anymore. Not Samuel's death, not the whispers she had heard from the other souls, not how she had been so close to knocking on death's door.

Yes. That part was coming back now. Sammie would have been happier if it hadn't. The purple, yellow, and ..pink soul. They wanted her to join them in death. That's fuck up, but maybe they were lonely.

"Well, I'm amazed it wasn't long. The shape you were in." Melissa said.

They were speaking quietly, but Alex still stirred on the other bed. He blinked his eyes open, stretching in a almost cat-like way.

"Hey, lazybones, you're finally up." His voice was hoarse, and his haggard face betrayed how little rest he'd gotten in the last few days. "You know, you can't just sleep all the time, babe. It sets a bad example for the rest of us."

Sammie smiled. He called her babe, she'd have to tell him not to ...later.

Standing, Melissa straightened her dress. "I think Angela went to get food, I'll go tell her that you're up."

Sammie nodded, too tired for any more words. It felt rude, but Melissa didn't seem to mind.

"Try to stay awake for a few minutes, and I'll bring you something to eat, okay?"

Sammie nodded again, grateful for Melissa.

After a few seconds of careful study she saw that, aside from looking tired, Alex was alright. Alex was safe from Samuel now.

"How are you feeling?" Sammie asked, her voice sounded like she smoked three packs a day. She ignored it, her eyes on Alex. His hazel eyes looked like the most beautiful eyes in the world. Only second place to gre-

No more thinking..

Grinning, Alex shook his head. His eyes shining with relief. "Never better, babe. You?"

Sammie shrugged. Too many kinds of pain demanded attention, so she chose not to pay attention to any of them. Pain would only slow her down.

"Fine," she said. Everything hurt, and she had no energy, but she wasn't about to complain. She was alive after all that, and that was more than she'd ever expected.

"Heh, well, you look like crap."

It hurt to laugh, but she ignored it. "You're not winning any beauty contests either, dickface."

"Yeah," Alex said, grinning wider, "but that's me all the time." He blinked, and reached up to scrub one hand across his right eye. "I'm, uh, really glad you're awake," he said, glancing away. "Was starting to think you weren't gonna..."

Memory seeped back into Sammie's mind, a slow drip. It was like poison, everything she did or was going to do. She'd been so close to death, but she got away. Sammie basically ding-dong-ditched death's door.

"Ha, please. I'm unbreakable, like a Nokia phone."

Alex laughed, such a heartening sound. She wanted to drown in it.

"Have you talk to Ange yet?"

Nodding, Alex crossed his arms. "We had a ..talk. That's all I'll say about that for now. But I'm thankful she turned up when she did," he added.

"Me, too." Sammie's mind was everywhere. Angela, the fire, Samuel, the other magical souls, and the strong smell of the room.

The scent of skeleton flowers prevailed here. Sammie wondered why she hadn't realized the connection right away. She knew this smell; it just hadn't been this strong before.

It was usually a small flower crown of no more than ten flowers, rather than a garden of them in vases of water for display. The vases covered most of the tables, and chairs.

They were a reminder of her nights with Samuel. They were all just a bitter sweet memory.

"She's been good crowd control, too," Alex piped up again, gesturing at the vases of flowers, and stuffed animals piled up around the room. "I'm pretty sure the whole town's been through here by now."

It certainly looked that way. Sammie wasn't sure why her neighbors had gone to so much trouble, but she was touched by their thoughtfulness.

She shouldn't feel relieved about any of this. That was wrong. She shouldn't feel like she'd had some of the poison drawn out of her body. She shouldn't feel glad, or good, or happy.

The world shouldn't feel brighter right after she'd been the reason someone is dead right now. It shouldn't feel like waking up from a nightmare. And yet...

"I thought you were going to end up like Mary and Frances.. i thought he'd kill you, too." Alex deeply sighed, wiping his eyes. It was obvious he was trying not to cry.

So that's what happened. Samuel spoke of them, but never really saying what happened. Maybe she'll never know..

"You dorks ready to eat?" Angela asked, stepping into the room. She managed to carry five big Chinese food containers. Alex sat up to make room for her on the spare bed.

Melissa followed soon after, carrying drinks. She grinned sheepishly as she settled down next to Angela on the other bed.

"I made sure to bring fortune cookies," Angela announced. "Can't pass up a chance to find out about the future!"

"Only thing in you should see in your future is less greese," Alex said, looking right at a pimple on Angela's chin.

Angela snorts. "Excuse me pizzaface, but I think you are the last person I should hear this from."

"Hey, I'm twenty-three, it happens. What are you thirty?" Alex rolls his eyes, his grin widening. Sammie wasn't sure what Angela was talking about, he actually had less pimples now.

"Twenty-seven bitch." Angela flicked some her noodles at Alex.

"Over the hill, I see."

"Bite me."

Sammie smiled, letting the heat from her container seep into her hands. She was alive.

Her favorite people were here, safe and sound. She took a bite, letting the others' conversation swirl around her like warm water.

She'd done an awful thing. There hadn't been much choice, but she'd done an awful thing all the same. Getting Samuel killed hadn't undone any of the awful things that had gone on before. It was over, but it had happened.

The death of a bystander, lying to her loved ones, all the pain she endured, it all still happened ..and it was her fault.

"Ha! Like you did when you got pissed on by the doctor's dog?"

"Ewww, you got pissed on?"

But she didn't let herself think of that. She instead let herself drown in the laughter and love of her friends and family. It could only get better right?

-----------------Two Months Later-----------------

Sammie sat alone on the roof of her and Alex's apartment looking towards the forest, toying with some of the potted plants she had set up. Coneflower, Salvia, Daylilies, and Skeleton flowers.

She hadn't been outside of town much in the couple of months. Not even to jog. Instead, she'd go jogging at Snowberry park. It was boring after awhile, but she refused to go alone into the forest.

Sammie spent all her time either jogging, putting in more work hours at the thrift store, or training with Angela. It was harder to spend all day sleeping, crying, or staring off into space when there was something to do, no matter what as it was.

"Sam?" Alex's voice called from through the roof door.

She wasn't sure if she wanted to be left alone or not. She could just pretend she wasn't up here, but that idea didn't appeal at all. It was strange-- as much as Sammie wanted to be left alone, she didn't want to be by herself.

"Here!" She yelled back after a couple of moments, not bothering to look at the door behind her.

Alex came and plopped down beside her, eyeing her. "So you're up here again, I see."

"Yeah." She replied, letting the conversation die. No, she had to talk to him. He was trying to engage her, she could at least chat with him. Still, it was awhile before she spoke up again.

"So hows the adult shop? Are you still working there?" Sammie asked, once the silence stretched out from companionable to awkward.

"Hmm?" Alex blinked at her, as if he'd been lost in thought. That was nothing new. "Nah, as a matter of fact. Remember that girl you saved? What's-her-name? Jane? Jona? Anyway, last time I was out I saw her closing shop."

"Joan. Yeah, she's really nice." Sammie supplied, idly. It was hard not to remember her. Sweet girl, but very ..persistent. Sammie had avoided standing in view of any of the windows for several days while she was camped out in front of the house. Joan had a weird way of repaying Sammie's 'kindness' with endless infatuation. It was flattering, if not a little awkward.

"Anyway," Alex said, "I got a job at the Gonzalez's gas station. So have you explained what happened to anyone else?"

She hadn't. She was having trouble putting it all into words, even if half those words were evasions or outright lies. That picture on Ms. Soya's mantle. What could Sammie possibly say? Sammie couldn't tell the whole truth. There was no point in opening such an old wound when it no longer mattered, was there? No, it was much kinder to just keep silent about this whole thing.

"No," Sammie muttered. "I'm actually thinking of traveling to Saint Leina. Maybe just for a few weeks to clear my head."

Alex nodded his agreement. "Sounds like a good idea? I've been sitting still way too much this week, we should do something exciting."

"What was that? Did you say you've been sitting still too long?" Sammie's jaw hung open in honest shock.

"Oh, shut up," Alex said, rolling his eyes though a smile tugged at his mouth. "I'm not lazy all the time."

Sammie smiled back, though it was not exactly genuine. What was that saying? Fake it 'til you make it. She found she was doing a lot of faking, so the making it couldn't be far off.

"You okay?" Alex asked, grin fading.

"Fine." She said too quickly. Beside her, Alex sighed.

They hadn't done a great deal of talking about the last few months. Not for lack of trying, but Sammie ended up doing more crying than speaking when she didn't simply lock up. Alex would sit with her until she calmed down, and then they would go back to whatever they'd been doing. After a few days of that routine, Alex stopped asking questions.

As much as they could, they tried to go back to their old routine. Sammie was keeping up on the housework again, Alex was back to finding interesting things to read in the evenings.

Yet despite their best efforts, they still found themselves avoiding one another, each leery of cutting the other on his own sharp edges. She missed Alex, but found it more easier to be alone. Will they ever go back to the way it was before? She hoped so..

They fell into an almost comfortable silence again. Alex leaned his head on hers, and she let him. God, she really missed this. How long had it been since they just hung out?

A brief flash caught his attention, and Sammie looked down to see Alex's cell phone, the camera lens on the phone angled in their direction.

Sammie frowned. She used to love having her picture taken, but she didn't really like it anymore. "You're not sending that to anyone, are you?"

"Nah, but it will be my main screen. Sorry, babe. Couldn't resist."

Sammie grumbled, but let the matter drop. Alex leaned over to kick the open shed door, it closed with a loud bang. Sammie jumped, her mirroring soul materializing above her in an instant.

"Heh, my bad." Alex grimaced apologetically.

"No, it's fine," she said, irritated at herself. She glared upward, waiting for the agitated frisson of magic to die down. "I wish it would stop doing that."

It was getting ridiculous. She raised a hand to dispel the attack, only for Alex to interrupt her with a little cough.

"Uh, you know, it wouldn't really hurt anything to just leave it for a while," Alex said, studiously not looking at the evidence of her minor panic attack looming overhead. "Here, mine could use some fresh air, too."

Alex waved his hands up, summoning his own mirroring soul, letting it hover over him while he laid down on the roof by some plants.

Attacks didn't need fresh air, and the mirroring souls weren't pets, but Sammie appreciated the attempt to make her feel better. She hated to admit it, but she was more relaxed this way. She couldn't very well walk around town with her magical flaming bird trailing along behind her, but out here in the roof there was no harm.

Sammie sighed, turning her attention back to the view. The sun was setting, creating a nice silhouette among the trees.

"You're not as jumpy as you were," Alex said quietly. She was surprised he knew what she was feeling, since she knew her face no longer gave away her feelings. Something useful that she got from her training with...

"I hate that it still happens at all. It's been a months." She sighed, and closed her eyes.

It was embarrassing, how twitchy she was. She tried to keep the anxiety under control, holding it tight like wild magic. And, like wild magic, it slipped out anyway, generally at the worst times.

Some days it felt as though Sammie was carrying around a monster inside her, with nothing to hold it back from destroying her. Most of the time she could ignore that feeling and carry on, but it was always just a step behind her, waiting for an unguarded moment or a sudden noise to spring free.

Alex gave him a look. "Two months isn't that long, babe. You're getting better." He grinned, raising his arm to flex. "If any punks give you crap about it, I'll have Martin and Ben pay them a visit, scare 'em straight. You've got street cred with those guys now."

Despite herself, Sammie laughed. What was the quiet bartender meant to do, glare disapprovingly? And she was pretty sure Ben was a 'lover not a fighter'. "Yeah, no. They're not actually scary though."

"Ah, you've clearly never seen them on the first of the month when ther calls all the tabs in." Alex shivered. "It's bone-chilling."

Sammie let out a snort at that. Alex blinked, brow knitted as he mulled something over.

"Yeah. Well, it makes sense with you," she teased, "I can hardly blame them, with the kind of tab you run up."

Her comment earned her a clump of mud to the head. "Hey!" She protested, wiping it away.

A week ago, the sharp pof of packed mud against her head would have resulted in more than a momentary flinch. Maybe Alex had a point. Maybe Sammie was making progress; it was just slower than she'd like.

Alex huffed in mock offense. "Hey yourself! I don't even have a tab running this month, thank you very much."

Sammie gave him an apologetic half-smile. "That is true. Sorry."

Alex hadn't spent nearly as much time at the bar as he used to. When he did go, no one let him pay for anything. Whether that was out of gratitude or guilt, she didn't know. Maybe both. It should be both. But that was unkind. Mistakes had been made, and gossip was just part of human nature. They sat in silence for a few minutes.

"Everyone has been very patient with me," Sammie said, still chewing over that past months.

Alex sat back up, scratching his face and leaving a smudge of mud. "Yeah, they better be. You're the town hero. Heh." He grinned a knowing grin.

Sammie couldn't keep the grimace from his face. She hated that title. The whole idea was tainted for her now.

It wasn't like that story Angela had told them all, about how she fought a monster and won. She wasn't some dashing, battle-scarred beautiful guardian. Not even close, she felt just as much a monster as Samuel was. Truth be told, she was a fucking mess.

The truth wouldn't be told however. Not the full truth, anyway. And so Sammie was left to fidgeted on her pedestal. Everyone in town had seen the magical discharge in the sky, so most of the story wasn't doubted.

She and Alex lapsed back into comfortable quiet. The longer they stayed up here safely watching the sun set, the more the tight knot of anxiety loosened in her chest. It was funny, how little she noticed the tension she always carried now.

It was nice until it wasn't.

Alex looked up when Sammie sniffled a little too loud. "You okay?"

She nodded. When had she started crying? She was having a good day. Nothing bad was happening. Why was she even crying now?

"I didn't hit you to hard with the mud, did I?" He asked her, probably already knowing her answer.

She shook her head, words were never easy when she was crying. She'd usually cry in silence for half an hour then go back to normal. Whatever she felt was normal now, it sure as hell wasn't normal like before her training.

Alex frowned. "Alright. Just, um, checking."

She couldn't have a few hours of normalcy, it seemed. Loosening the knot meant all the mess came spilling out in tangles.

"He kept me company when I did things like this," Sammie said, just above a whisper. She didn't want to tell him even though she could. Which was a huge difference to before when she couldn't but wanted to.

"Oh." Alex sat by her, careful not to touch her. "Do you wanna head inside? We can if you want."

Sammie shook her head. "I can't just not do things because of..."

"Okay. Just say the word if you change your mind," Alex said. He reached up to give Sammie's attack a quick scritch on the head before heading back to laying down.

A feeling of safety and peace bloomed in Sammie's soul, passed along through her connection with her mirroring soul. It crowded out some of the sorrow, grounded her in the here and now.

"I think...I think I miss him." Sammie whispered, horrified at the thought. "Is that insane?"

Alex was back at her side in an instant, holding her tightly. She let herself be pulled in, enjoying the smell of his hoodie. Coffee mixed with old book smell. Like always.

"No," Alex said, his voice soft as if to calm her down. "You're not insane; you're you. I don't think you have it in you to really hate anyone."

Rubbing at her eyes, Sammie couldn't help a slight, rueful smile. Weak and stupid, just like Samuel said she was. A silly idiot. Samuel would have been disgusted to know that he was missed. That Sammie was mourning him, despite everything that happened.

"It's fine," Alex said, forcing a grin. "I can hate enough for both of us."

His anger radiated from him, almost palpable, not directed at her but at someone who was two months dead.

"It'd be easier if I could hate him, I think." Any rational person would. The things Samuel had done and threatened to do were unpardonable. She should hate him!

An innocent man was dead, her friends had been put in terrible danger, and Sammie now had scars along with memories that she would never be rid of.

Samuel was gone, and even though Sammie lived she was gone, too. She was different, she could never go back to how she was. She was tainted now.

"I feel like I'll wake up and these last few weeks will all have been a dream, and he'll be outside waiting for me." Sammie regretted saying that aloud as soon as the words were out. Alex's arms tightened around her.

"He's dead." Alex pronounced this like the words were blocks of granite. "But in the unlikely event of a zombie attack, we'll just kill him again. Right?"

She wondered how unlikely that truly was. Samuel had faked his death once before, hadn't he? Plus, she wasn't really sure she had seen him before she left. Who was to say...? No. No, they had recovered a burnt up body. She refused to let paranoia get a ahold of her.

Samuel was gone for good. More words she didn't really want to say but couldn't really stop trickled out, giving voice to a thought that had worn deep ruts in her mind over the past months. "I wish there had been something...if I could have just.."

How many lives was one life worth? It depended on the life, didn't it? She hated that it had to be a life over another, it shouldn't have to be that way ever.

"That ass made his choices, just like the rest of us," Alex snapped, grin falling into a scowl. "There's always a choice."

"B-but maybe I could have.." She stammered.

His expression softened, and he leaned close to her face. "You did the right thing, babe. Please understand that."

It didn't feel like the right thing. If Samuel was on the hook for his choices, then Sammie was, too. She'd chosen whose life was worth more, whose life had to end. What's more, she knew she'd make the same choice again without a second thought.

There at the end, she was the final blow. She had left Samuel, leaving him behind making it so he did not survive the fire that she caused. It had been an execution, not self defense.

There was no excusing what she did. He was helpless and she left him die. But her friends and her neighbors were worth more. Alex was worth more. And she found that she would do it again.

"Are you sure you don't want to go home?" Alex asked, letting her go so he could lean back and look at her face.

Sammie shook her head. "I'll be fine," she said. "Maybe we could just sit here a little longer?"

"Sure, babe." Alex leaned against her, solid and comforting. The shadows of their attacks, still present, lay over them. "Take all the time you need."

Minutes ticked by, silent, unraveling like an untied knot. A chill breeze shook the trees. The pine needles rustled a soothing whisper. Every minute that passed took her farther away from Samuel.

Farther away from everything that had happened. She was getting better. She'd keep getting better. She had Alex, Angela and all her friends nearby to help her.

Sammie sighed, finally getting up. With a wave of her hand, she dissolved her attack. "Let's head back in."

It fell around like strange snow. Sammie smiled. They always loved snow..

Alex jumped to his feet, letting his attack fall apart as well. "Sure thing, babe."

Sammie let him pull her down the stairs to their apartment. Maybe she could make something special for dinner, it'd be a good excuse to invite Angela and Melissa. Alex headed to the kitchen for some coffee. But it's noon! Never mind, Sammie headed to her room to check her laptop. She wanted to feel some normality after her cry session on the roof.

A black stuffed dog on her bed caught her eyes instantly, all thoughts of normalcy gone. She went to pick it up. Where did this come from? It wasn't one that she had gotten at the hospital..

Dread grew in the pit of her stomach as she looked over the small envelope that came with it. When she read what was written there, she let the dog and envelope fall to the floor.

Congratulations on hitting your peak.
Maybe next time we can celebrate it together. ~Sam.

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Omg! It's almost over ...sort of.

NEW chapters soon!