"Well, it certainly SOUNDS obscure," Helena relented. 

"It's perfect!" Main staggered down the hallway a bit slower this time, perhaps due to the blood loss. 

Bevan shrugged and followed him, clutching the book they needed in his arms. Sighing at the red and green splatters the duo had left behind them, Helena followed last, vainly trying to brush the blood off of the floor with her shoe.

*

They burst through the double doors, into the conference. Even Main had to agree, there were color blind gorillas with better fashion sense. The inhabitants wore suit and tuxedos, which would have made sense if you ignored the large colored Mohawks, or swathes of exotic fabric that constricted their waists. Making their way to the front of the room, Main overheard snippets of a conversation.

"It's an absolute crisis!"

"The ground... Yes, it's sinking."

"Poppycock! Have you ever seen them?"

"What? The giant worms collapsing the ground into the ocean? Well..."

"Of course not, because it's not real."

"Over-tunneling. That's what's causing it, mark my words."

"You there!" A particularly grotesque woman, with a neon, yellow dinner jacket approached Main. "What do you think?"

*

"What?" Main squinted at the particularly atrocious outfit she was wearing. "Say, I thought Nemesis said something about global worming a few chapters back." He looked at Helena, who shrugged. "He did, didn't he? I thought he solved the problem."

The woman gasped. "Haven't you heard? Nemesis was murdered, thus releasing the worms back on their tyrannical rampage." She was overcome with a fit of sobs and stormed off.

"Main, the lyrics," Helena whispered.

He nodded, removed the lyrics sheet, and read over it once more. 

"What song is it, anyway? Do I know it?" she asked.

"Do you!" Main waved the sheet of lyrics in front of Helena's rotting, zombified face. "Isn't it incredible, Helena? The very song we need to save Buttercup has been her anthem from the very beginning. 'What Makes You Beautiful'!"

Helena's face paled.