sobbing this ones sad and short 

present tense again wowser 

its really short beware literally the most of it is an authors note i wrote this in like 10 mins 

Thomas closes his eyes. 

He's tired. He's so, so exhausted and his eyes are so heavy but he can't sleep. It's quiet and he doesn't like it. He can't hear the annoying yet comforting snoring that always belongs to Minho, nor the wheezing Gally always makes when he sleeps. 

He's alone. 

Maybe that's how everything always begins and ends.

He started his new life alone, shooting upwards to the Glade, having no clue what the Hell was going on. And maybe he's ending that.. "new life" now. He's alone once more, he can't hear anything and he can't sleep. 

He knows everything's going to be different when he wakes up. They won't have to run away from WICKED anymore, because they're gone and him and the Gladers are safe. Or, safer. He somehow doesn't particularly like the thought of.. silence. He misses the few days he had in the Glade, with noise from the Gladers and the Maze moving. He knows he wasn't there for a long time, but he still feels a sense of... homesickness, nonetheless.

Or maybe it's Newt.

Newt felt like home. 

Newt's gone.

Newt's gone. 

Thomas shoots up from his bad, eyes snapping open at the sudden reality. He misses Newt. He misses Newt and he wants to hug him and exchange his own life for Newt's. 

Newt deserved so much better. With his scraggy blond hair, limp and bright, sunny smile, he was beautiful. The way he looked so perfect when the sun hit his face in a certain way - especially when it was sunset - and the way he always knew what to say. 

But now he was dead. He was dead and it was Thomas' fault. 

Thomas flops back down onto the bed, eyes wide and staring at the ceiling. He wants Newt back. He imagines Newt laying next to him, rubbing a comforting hand up and down his arm just as he did in the Scorch. 

"I'm so tired." His voice is weak and he knows that Newt laying next to him with his joke-mocking smile isn't real. He doesn't care. He wants the comfort, whether it's real or fake, whether he's going absolutely insane. 

He knows he's going fully insane when he closes his eyes and hears a soft, breathy laugh that could only belong to one person. Newt. 

"Then sleep." 

It's not a mocking phrase, not mocking how Minho would make it sound if he spoke the two words. It's.. comforting. Quiet, soft and relaxing. 

Thomas ignores the tear running down his face. He feels it and imagines it dropping it onto the pillow beneath his face. He imagines Newt bringing a hand up to his eye and rubbing his tears away. 

He doesn't feel pained by the imagination, although his eyes disagree. 

He feels.. numb. 

He wants to feel something. 

He laughs. 

He doesn't know why he's laughing. 

It turns to tears fast enough, and he's rolled over in a foetus position, crying, trying to protect him from his emotions, from WICKED, from... everything. 

He hears a comforting 'shh..' but it feels so real. It feels so, so real. 

He's tired. He wants to go to sleep. 

"Then sleep, my love." 

literally listening to champagne & sunshine and now my brain wants to write smut HOP IN THE SHOWER SHE BEGGIN FOR MORE DO NOT DISTURB ON THE HOTEL DOOR yo that song would be like newtmas thomas being a model or some shit and newt's in a band and they hook up every so often but omg wOW one time newt goes outside and gets drunk with minho and them all ykyk but thomas is at the same bAR (shocking wowowowo its so cliche kmn) and hes actually sober and newt goes up to him and is like "want to fuck xxxxx" and thomas snaps because hes iN LOVE WITH NEWT AND HES IN LOVE AND LOVELOVELOVELOVE but like thomas is just like "fuck you ihy why am i just your toy ily and i want a relationship" but newt is too drunk for this shit and is like "oh. delightful darling xxxx" and then gets cross and is like "youre not my toy i thought you liked sex" (i tHOUGHT YOU LIKED SEX BAHAHA) but then thomas is like "i'd like sex if it wasnt just for the benefit of you and we were dating" but then newt is like "why arent we dating then" and thomas is like "because you dont like me like i like you" and newt is like "why would you think that i do ly" and thomas pulls newt by his collar into him against the wall and they make out and then they leave the bar to go to a hotel or something and then boom sexy time sexy time sexy time sexy time (THIS WAS SO IRRELEVANT IM SORRYY BAHAHAHH)

if anyone can be bothered to read that then have fun xxx

SHE SAID FUCK ME LIKE IM FAMOUS I SAID OK ITS TWO FACED ITS TOO LATE BUT COMIN DOWN IS ALL I EVER DO BABE IM SO DOWN IF UR READY IM FLOATIN BUT IM HEAVY AND I'LL SHOW U IF U LET ME BABE sexy chase atlantic music 

music? more like mmmmusic 

fucking kill me im not funny 

this was nOT a good authors note right after this angsty oneshot im so sorry 

my music writing this was: champagne & sunshine, slow down, church, guys my age, lowlife 

it got more depressing as it went on (sort of) 

i finished heartstopper and now i wanna write a thominho au niafjioawjfklh 

YOURE BURIED IN THE PILLOW YEAH YOURE SO LOUD IM ABOUT TO SHOW U BABY SLOW DOWN SLOW DOWN SLOW DOWN IM ABOUT TO SHOW U BABY SLOW DOWN

chase atlantic.