A/N

Lol gaiv sum spoilers by da taitel. XD Tell meh if u can't reed dis.

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Your POV

I'm a nobody. You thought, just a fuckin' beauty queen wannabe, an asshole. I have no use on this planet, I'm just a waste of space, of time. I'm not beautiful, not smart, not rich, I have no talent, and I still look fuckin' fat and ugly even with make-up! You dropped down to the floor of your bedroom, crying out loud. You couldn't stop thinking of yourself being just another mistake of God, accidentally sent here. You scratched your arms with your long and sharp nails, making some cuts, but no blood came. You started banging your head on the wall, trying to kill yourself. But nothing happened, you only hurt your head, still no blood. You tried and tried to kill yourself, but no matter what, you always remind yourself that you are afraid of dying. You got up, still crying, and screamed. "GOD DAMMIT WHY?!"

"WHY GOD SENT ME HERE IN THIS FUCKIN' HELL?! WHY DID HE SEND ME IF I WAS JUST ANOTHER MISTAKE?!" Your eyes drowned with tears you could hardly see anything, you cheeks burned and your face was very red. You fell purposely, hardly knocking yourself on the floor. But nothing happened, instead, the stinging pain made it hard to move. You tried cutting yourself with your nail again, still crying and screaming.

Newt's POV

"Hey, Y/N, I'm here!" He half laughed. He hanged his jacket on the coat hanger and placed his hat on the top. "Y/N?" He called again, this time, his expression scared. He furrowed his eyebrows and looked around the house to see it was lonely and quiet. Then he heard screams. Shouting. And loud cries. He knew it was your voice. Shocked, he quickly ran upstairs towards your bedroom.

Your POV

As if on cue, you changed expression, being still and blank, as if someone else was controlling your mind. You stood up, slowly and silently. Then turned around to see a small old box below your cabinet. You slowly walked towards it, kneeling down and pulling out of the shadows. Then you opened it, still kneeling, and panting from the exhaustion of crying out loud. You saw a gun. A handgun. You grabbed it and stood up, facing your mirror, you start to cry again. Your hands shook as you raised the gun to face your head on the side. "Goodbye world, goodbye fuckin'-" you closed your eyes and suddenly, the door was opened, disturbing the silence. You opened your eyes quickly and looked to the direction of the loud noise caused by the door. You saw Newt in a quick glance and closed your eyes again, facing where you were, not bothering him, you almost triggered it when Newt pulled the gun away from your hands, throwing it across the room. "NOOO! NOOO! YOU! NOOOO!!!" You screamed, crying 'till your voice almost ran out, sore from the shouting you just did.

"Bloody hell Y/N!" He said in total shock, he grabbed your hands and faced you, who was struggling to break free.

"DAMMIT NEWT!! DAMN YOU!!" You screamed as your face turned red with anger. You struggled to break free of his grasp but he was too strong. He then pulled you into a hug, placing his head on top of yours, nuzzling your hair. "Ssh shh shh..." he whispered, trying to calm you down. You started to hit his chest so hard, still screaming his name with swears. But then you calmed down, crying onto his chest, you hugged him back.

"Why, Y/N, why?" He whispered to your ear, rubbing the back of your head. But you kept silent, just crying so hard on his chest. You hugged him back so tight, you felt safe in his embrace. He then sighed and let you go, carrying you to your bed. you laid on your bed, facing the inside of your bed and put your hands in front of your face. You laid only looking at your hands, nothing else. Newt laid infront of you, holding your hands, he furrowed his eyebrows in curiosity.

"Tell me," he started as he laid infront of you, facing you and holding your hand. "What happened?"

You breathed heavily, still panting from the crying you just did and decided to talk, "I'm nothing," you started, talking was so difficult with your condition. He turned your hand to see the scars there were across your arm. "I'm just a mistake." Those words sent a click inside him, he looked at you with concerned. He moved closer and hugged you tight. "Don't ever think that, you're perfect just the way you are."

"No!" You shouted, bursting out fountains of tears. "I'm nothing! I'm not pretty, I'm not smart, not even rich or popular! I have no use in this-!"

"Shh shh shh shh shh..." he whispered in your ear, hugging you even tighter, and you hugged back, crying on his chest. "Don't say that. You mean everything to me. If you die now, it'll mean the end of the world to me!"

He starts kissing your forehead and you feel useful because of him. you pulled him and connected your lips, making it the most wonderful time in your life.

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A/N

Omg omg omg omg!!! XD this makes me feel a thousand feels!! But I wrote this to express my feelings. This is how I feel right now, but sadly, there's no one here to make me feel better. Newt's not here... 😢 I just wish someone like Newt would be there at times like this, but just no.