XXXXV - Assholes & Bitches, Auditions - XXXXV


[ Chanyeol makes his appearance ]


Before I left granddad's, I had accidentally bumped into some dude, knocking both of us on our asses. I got up quickly, then I helped him up as well. "My bad, I wasn't watching where I was going. Excuse me while I go take a walk before I castrate the guy my so-called mother chose over me." I walked towards Mikey, I dug in my pockets handing him my phone and keys.

He stuffed a wad of cash in my hand and told me to go.

I saw that same guy from earlier, the one wearing the hoodie paired with a silver and red mask. I still wasn't able to see this person face to see if it was my Hyung or not. I heard the whole conversation from the front gate, I didn't mean to eavesdrop either. It just so happened to come here, because of the call I got from the old man. How could my father do that to someone else's family? I would never understand how he could do that after all these years, I watched the guy in the hoodie, walk over to another guy. He handed him something and was going to leave but we ended up both on the falling on our asses. The person with the mask helped me up and left.

I got in my sperm donor's face, "Why do you have to ruin another family? First ours now, and now Hyung's family. I'm flying home tonight, don't bother me no more as far as I know our family doesn't exist, the Chan's don't have a son no more." I run out after the person in the hoodie.

I shoved him away from the lady, I looked to the dude with a pink phone and keys in his hand. I ran after the person in the mask and hoodie. "Hey, wait up! I'm sorry my sperm donor ruined your family gettogether. He ruined me and my mom's life, and now he is ruining yours." I heard the person laugh, a girl? no way!

"May I have the name of the person, that has a similar situation as mine?" I had asked the guy I bumped into. "Wow never in my life, could I ever imagine hearing the words MY SPERM DONOR come out of someone else's mouth. By the way, I'm Kai Lee it's nice to meet you. A piece of advice, I'm getting married so no getting any bright ideas. My heart belongs to one person, and that person has me in his heart as well." I turn and tell the guy, as I take off my mask.

"Well Kai Lee, my name is Chanyeol Chan. It's my pleasure, well sort of. Call your Little brother and fiance and everyone you came with, I'll give you an official tour." I tell her.

I thought about it for a second, "Sure why the fuck not." I went to my group chat and said to let's go and play for a bit then we can go home. I had told them that we have a tour guide and he is not to be hurt or picked on. Not only did they not hurt him, most of the boys knew him already.

I was confused, I looked at Zion and Mino, and scrunched up my face. I was pulled me aside. I didn't understand how they all knew him. "Hey dummy, He's an original member of EXO!"

"WHAT!" I yelled out, as everyone turned towards me. I ran towards the front, "You... You...! Ah, forget it... Ya'll scan go suck on some big donkey balls." I pouted and stomped my foot like a little kid.

"Uh... Am I missing something here? Why is she mad?! Did I do something wrong?" I stare at Kai laughing uneasily.

"No, I just made her realize who are, and she is baffled. She fangirls over 3 guy groups to be exact, her no. 1 is BIG BANG, no. 2 is BTS, no. 3 EXO-CBX. You've been out of the game for a while, I'm surprised you haven't heard of her or.." I was going to finish what I was saying until I was elbowed in the side. "Hey! What the hell was that for?!" I stop and notice it was Kai who had done it. "Fine, fine your secret to tell. But can I just add the part about the show instead, It's not really telling him?" I had asked her while looking at Kai who just gives me the thumbs up.

"Kai here is an American K-Idol under the company of YG Entertainment, She signed after the finale of UNDER NINETEEN." I move out of the way before she could hit me again.

I was kind of shocked, "Oh really what do you do? sing or dance?" I heard a scoff from her.

"Why is it people only mention singing and dancing? Nevermind, I guess I can understand. Everyone always underestimates me, it's fine. Let go Karaoke, So I can turn our dear CHANNIE stupid as a statue or should I make him faint like Jhope Sunbae?" I say out loud and the boys laugh at Jhope when I say the last part.

I look at every single one of the boys, "I need the following Mikey, Taeyang, Jiyong, Sungwoo, Jhope to help me." I whisper in their ears, I eye both Kai and Channie as I point to them. They start laughing, we run up on ahead and I show them what I wanted them to do just the first 12 count anyways.

https://youtu.be/daJQKUGbBSM

[ PRETEND THE GIUY IN THE YELLOW HAT IS KAI WITH A RED AND SILVER MASK ON ]

I pointed to Jungkook right away and he turned up the speaker in his hands, I smiled as we got into position my mask back in place as I started to rap. We started the choreography, I started laughing when I see Channie's face go into shock. I finished with a backflip, the applause was heard around. I continue to dance, having the time of my life, I could see Kai walk up to me and start to the choreography with me. Man, even some of the Passer Byers were joining in.

I walked up to Channie and pushed up his jaw, I couldn't stop laughing so hard. I leaned on the wall to sober up a little. "If you think that's something, you can't even fathom what I could do. There's a real good reason why I was given the name ALL-STAR on the show UNDER NINETEEN."

We made it to the karaoke place, I walked in and asked for the biggest room they had, I handed them my credit card. I was passed a menu and told to follow, Can you imagine a group over 50 people walk into a karaoke place all covered head to toe and hiding from prying eyes. I smirked, I walked into the room.

"Uh, Kai, I think you turned him stupid he can't even form a full sentence." I look at T.O.P Oppa, I walked over to him.

I grabbed Chanyeol's hand and brought him into the corner, "Damn, are you okay?" I had asked him with concern in my voice. "Someone please get me some alcohol or something to help him out of this state please, I think he is in shock."

I started worrying, I didn't need someone's daddy coming after me. I started wringing my hands pacing back and forth, "I'm sorry I was only having a little fun, I didn't know my fun would turn into this." I walked to the other corner and sank to the ground. I brought my knees up and put my head down, I started to sob quietly.

I heard the sound of crying, it knocked the shock right out of me. I looked around, it was Kai. I ran over and pulled her in my arms, "Kai don't cry, I'm fine I swear. It's just you shocked the hell out of me, I get like that sometimes that's why I haven't performed in a while. I really loved your performance, I swear please don't cry. Come on little sister, please don't cry." I could hear her sobs calm down and she looked up at me through her tears.

"Did you just call me your little sister?" That's the only thing I heard, which made me really happy. "I guess me meeting your dad didn't really go to waste, I guess I could accept him because you are his son," I said carefully, still thinking. I stood up and walked to the others, "Guys welcome your newest brother Chen Chanyeol, take care of him please."

Everyone cheered, I felt arms around me as Jiyong kissed my neck. The boys pulled him away and said no lovey-dovey in front of them. "So Channie, you ready to be shocked again? Boys, which voice should I use? The one that made me famous or the one that was just released?" I had everyone look at me.

They looked at each other and all yelled out the one that made me famous, I shrugged my shoulders as in an okay. "He is going to need another refill, so I don't have to worry please."

I looked around and saw a keyboard just sitting there collecting dust, I got an idea. "Jungkook and N Oppa, record this and send it to me after, please. This will be my first time ever attempting to do this song, I smirked at Jiyong and Taeyang Oppa as they did a spit take.

"Not again! ugh alright, whose song are you covering this time?" They both asked me.

"Ariana Grande, I hope you like." I brought the mic and put in the mic holder

https://youtu.be/6DFWmf0RCh8

I started playing the keys for the melody I wanted, I cleared my throat. I could see them sit on the edge o their seats. I smirked as I felt my mask being undone from my face, I was so into the song. As I put my everything again into another song, I smiled I knew the high note was coming. I heard a few thumps as a few of them had fainted again. I kept on going, as it blended together with whoever was doing the harmony. I turned around to see everyone that had fallen, it was still the same 2 but I added Kai, Sungwoo, and RM to that list.

I thought in my head, I looked at Taehyung. I told him to come and sit next to me and I whispered in his ear, of the song I was doing next. He nodded his head up and down and got up and ran back to his seat.


https://youtu.be/R5vCEqRfm2c

I was playing around with beat mixer when everyone looked up at me in awe. I switched the sound to symphony playing the necessary keys to the way I wanted them to hear it, I smiled when I heard the gasp and a curious Yoon-gi Oppa get up and walk towards me. I looked up at Channie, "Call up your Sperm donor and tell him to come so he can stop crying already, my mom is blowing up my phone." I call out as I continue to play the keys.

I turned in my seat and sang, I took off my beanie and face mask completely off. I was building up the song, I switched up my vocal and my rapper voice, I heard the door open as the two people who made me so mad earlier walk in with shock on their faces. I look at my mom, as I sang I closed my eyes and I let my voice take over.

"HOLY SHIT! YOUR DAUGHTER IS THAT KAI!" I looked down at my sweet Euhna. "My father is going to kill me!" I sank to my knees and just sat there.

I stopped playing, "What do you mean your father? Who is your father?" I got up and stood in front of him. I look at him really good, then I remembered his face and it just clicked just like that. I started to laugh, "Godfather is one smart man, I'm glad to know someone besides your son is on my side. But I had Channie call you here, to say you can go ahead and be with my mom I don't care as long as Channie is my brother. I could give two fucks on who you are, you don't matter only those that I trust wholeheartedly matter. Alright, boys, it's time to go home. I have a rather busy schedule in about 8 hours." I say as I look down at my watch.

I smirked as we all went out the door, I looked back at William. "Even though she's my mother and I can't stand the sight of her, don't think you can bully her. I promise you I will come back and beat the shit out of you. I hope you got that into your fucking head, I hate bullies and liars the most. Have a good day Bill!" I bumped his shoulder and walked out the door.

"Kai, let hurry to grandfathers so we can say our goodbyes," I say to my Noona.

"Wait! Where is home? I want to go!" Channie calls out.

"We're going home to Seoul, where we belong. Where do you think we came from? Mars?" I ask him and shake my head.

I look at everyone, the last person I look at is Jiyong, "Come on let's go say our goodbyes, I want to sleep cuddling with you on the plane."

- time skip cos I'm super lazy -

We finally landed with 3 extra people in tow, my new brother and my cousins. I told them they can stay in our grandparent's house for now, since I'm with Jiyong. Mikey took Channie to his house. I called up YG and all of the other CEO'S, notifying them that I had brought home everyone's artist and that they are safe and sound. I texted a few friends to help me with auditions, I'm going to make it interesting.

I texted Channie, telling him he is helping me with auditions but everyone will be unrecognizable along with myself. I drove to magic mirror to see the stylist, just for today I got an undercut and had her give me a pink and red Goku Hair. No one knew what my plans were, they just knew I was going to have some fun. I looked in the mirror, I looked ridiculous. But I didn't care, I was only doing this because I wanted to give people a chance as they had done for me.

I arrived early at the caffe and cooked breakfast.

"Uh excuse me, I'm looking for Kai. Can you tell her that her brother is here."

I turned and pulled down my mask, "Morning!"

When I saw her pull her mask down I choked on my muffin. "What the hell? DO YOU ALWAYS DO SHIT LIKE THIS?" I had practically yelled out.

"YUP! Keeps everyone on their toes! It's actually quite fun! My stylist is here, she can give you a small fade and spike up yours too if you want." I had asked Channie.

"Sure, why the fuck not! This better be fun." I tell my little sister.

"I plan on pretending to audition with me and a few friends, just for the fuck of it. I have everything written down for you, Me and my group are called D2D. It consists of 3 male idols and 2 female idols. Btw no one else knows I changed my look, not even our brother or cousins and not even Jiyong. SO please don't say anything." I tell Channie.

I see my friends come in head to toe covered, I motion to my stylist to get to work. Everyone looking like me. We laugh at each other all goofy looking, I tried so hard to hold back my laughter. Soon people started showing up and my stylist had left to come back with our outfits, I smiled when she gave us our MATCHING white FACE MASKS. I gave the other 4 a look as they shook with quiet laughter, I gave the signal to go and change.

We came out just in time when all of my brothers all walked in. The 5 of us pretended to be clumsy, bowing for forgiveness from my brothers. I blinked my one purple eye then my one silver, "I'm very sorry sir, my leg fell asleep." I could see Channie laughing quietly in the corner.

Attention everyone, "We will start shortly, First up is D2D. YOU GOT 15 MINUTES."

https://youtu.be/DWy40jTv8cw

Soon the music started and it was just me and Joy, Jay and Sik-k patiently waiting on the side with Jhope.

"No, she didn't!" I hear Jiyong gasp out loud.

"Oh yeah she did, You wanna guess who is up there with her? Besides Jay and Sik-k that is." I tell my little sisters fiance.

"I should have seen this coming, This girl always tries to have fun with the things she does. Let me guess, she talked you into doing this." I motion to his wardrobe and hair. He gave me a nod as I just laugh at him shaking my head.

I think to myself as she runs up to me and pulls her mask down, "I knew I couldn't fool you, unless someone mentioned it to you." I question Jiyong Oppa.

"No, I figured it out, when I heard Jay singing for real. Only you could pull something like this, but you actually looked good in a group. Bossman wanted you to be in a group but he saw more potential in as a soloist, but he said if you ever wanted to be in a group he could make it happen no problem all you have to do is tell him. By the way, what is D2D anyway." I tell her.

"Oh it's Dare 2 dream, I wanted something original yet unique. Its what I wanted to call my group if ever I was going to be in one." I explain to Jiyong Oppa.

I grab the mic on the table, "Alright, Welcome to auditions. I put those flyers out there for the best and the ones who are just like me. Show me what you got and we will go from there, You will be notified Sunday night if you have made it to the next round. Now if I call out your name you are to line up in front of one of the people who just danced, make sure it is evened out. Don't make me move you, Now Lee Sungwoo Pick a person."

I went down the line as everyone picked one of the 4, no one had the balls to pick me but my dear nephew. I grabbed a clipboard and handed it to Sungwoo, "Sign it and go hang out with BIG BANG, I'LL TALK TO YOU LATER."

I walked to where Joy was standing, "Reveal yourself," I looked at the dancers that chose Joy. I see two of them, that had the most potential. "Joy you know what to do, be back in an hour I want to see if you can bring out the best in them." Joy leaves and heads to the park. I walk to Jhope, "Reveal Yourself." I look at the ones who chose Jhope, there was 3 of them this time. The ones from Sungwoo's group.

"Sunbae, you know what to do. See you in an hour." He left with his group to the other V.I.P room. I walked to Sik-k's team, "Reveal Yourself." I wanted everyone on his team, "Go, be back in an hour." I walked over the last team. Jay had already revealed himself, not only was I shocked to see them here but they chose the right judge. "I have high hopes for specific groups, don't let me down."

I was a little sad not many showed up, I was hoping for some females. But I will be taking everyone who showed up. 19 people showed up and the last group that showed up were all the members of TXT, I smirked when I sat down. I put my head down pretending I was sad, I screamed out because I was so happy. I jumped up on the table cause I couldn't hold it in. Everyone looking like I was crazy, I moved the table back. I walked up towards my Laptop, "N, Mikey let's go." I pressed play on the laptop on got into position.

https://youtu.be/PRflvdal0fw

I watched from my spot, "So when she is happy she dances, the most am I correct? Wait this? This is from the top of her head, isn't it? It's not something they've practiced?" I asked Jiyong, I was shocked but not as I was when she rapped or sang when we were in Beijing.

"Kai, is determined, shy, level headed but stubborn as fuck. That's what I love about her, in all that she does you can tell how much she loves it. She has 3 different types of choreography for this one, there is only one song she has the same choreography for and that one of our songs. For others choreography just by seeing it once, she can do it right after as well as she could figure out the next move even before you do it. She has a really good memory, since being with Kai. A lot of bad things have happened to her, she was real different from before. That's because she was alone now look, her family of 5 went over hundreds, each person has a different relationship than the last person." I had explained her rather confused brother.

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