If Remus Lupin had thought that he had seen everything there was to see as far as surprises from Newt Scamander went, he was sadly mistaken. Newt, it turned out, wasn't just an adventurous old man with with a big heart, overbite, and a stutter. Newt, it turned out, was an absolute nutter. 

"What's he doing?" Sirius asked.

"He's mad, obviously," James said.

"I think he's stuffing his head in the lake," Peter observed.

"He's going to drown," Lily worried.

"The fuck is he doing?" Sirius asked - again.

"He's -- he's talking Mermish!" Remus exclaimed.

All of this was well earned. For Newt Scamander, leading the rest of the way down the path to the lake's edge, had suddenly paused a couple steps away from the water, shed his blue coat and laid it neatly over his briefcase. Promptly following, he walked determinedly up to the edge of the water, knelt down, and, just as Peter had said, shoved his head beneath the water... and proceeded to scream.

Indeed, he was speaking Mermish.

"EEEEEE OWWWWWEEEEE EYYYCHHHHHHH EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEe OUUUUUIIIIIIIIIII WWEEEERRRRRHHHHHH!" 

Lily said, "Gods alive, that's awful."

James said, "I'd stab myself in the ears and go deaf if I were a mermaid."

"If you were a mermaid you'd be a woman," Sirius pointed out.

"Merman then," James ammended.

"Merperson," corrected Lily.

"Merperson," James said.

Lily nodded in approval.

Peter clapped his hands, "I've never seen anyone speak mermish before, this is positively wonderful!"

"I saw Dumbledore do it," Sirius said, "Me and James did. After we blocked up the toilets and he made us go after them. Remember that?" he nudged James Potter in the side.

James nodded, staring at the backside of his childhood hero, as Newt continued on with his screaming under the water.

"Reckon there's anyone answering him?" Peter asked.

"He wouldn't just stay there shouting into the water if there wasn't," Remus argued.

"Wouldn't he, though?" Sirius said, raising his eyebrow. "Newt's pretty... How do I say this kindly? Insane?"

"How is he breathing?" Lily looked about at the other four.

Peter clapped his hands to his cheeks, "Oh no, he really is going to drown!"

"Peter, don't be an idiot, he woud've pulled his head back out by now if he was going to drown," Sirius said, rolling his eyes.

James said, "Maybe he's using the bubblehead charm or something."

They all waited and after what felt like an excruciatingly long amount of time - indeed, many of the other students had arrived for the class and started discussing what was happening on the shore of the lake by now - Newt finally pulled his head out of the water. His graying auburn hair hung in a wet knot of curls over his forehead and water dripped from his nose and his over-large teeth. The white button-up shirt and gold vest were both soaked, especially after he shook off like a dog, sending water droplets every which way from his hair.

He looked over all the students that had joined them and he smiled, "H-hullo," he said.

Whispers went up amongst some of the students that weren't used to him yet that it was Newt Scamander, and they all expressed their shock and awe. Marlene Mackinnon stepped up next to Lily Evans and James distinctly heard her whisper, "He's like royalty alright? I'm utterly starstruck. Aren't you just starstruck?"

Lily giggled, "I - I dunno, not really anymore..."

"Anymore? You've met him before?" Marlene stared at Lily with wide eyes, "I mean beside that time he came to sketch the Saramaug?"

"Yeah," Lily answered, "You should see it inside his briefcase!"

Marlene's eyes nearly bugged out of her head, "You've been in Newt Scamander's briefcase? And you haven't told me this why?"

"Because I knew you'd react like that," Lily laughed.

Newt, meanwhile, had moved his blue coat over and opened up the case and was doubled over reaching inside as he shouted, "I - I'VE GOT Q- QUITE THE SURPR-R-ISE FOR YOU L-LOT TODAY!" He suddenly arose from the case, drawing with him what looked like a small tube of water. He held it up. "Be-behold," he said, "One of th-the most in- interesting and dece-ceptive creatures." He turned it over in his palm, looking at the tube carefully. "Classified a Four-X b-by the Ministry's R-Regulation and Control of M-magical Creatures De-department, this li-ittle guy requires a spe-specially trained witch or wizard to handle his c-care." He turned the tube over.

"For that?" came Dimitri Goyle's voice, scoffing. "It's in a bleedin' tube..."

"Y-yes but bl-bleedin' tube or not, he - he's been tamed this one, so he's - he's a rather tame example, but I assure you that b-before I t-tamed him, he was qui-ite v-v-vicious," Newt said. "And m-might prove to be again, b-but I have the mermish st-standing by to assist if- if we need them... He'll also be - be joining them in the-the lake, as I found him under the B-Brook-rooklyn Bridge in N-New York some t-time ago... and have been m-meaning to return him h-home."

Peter raised his hand.

"Mr. P-Pettigrew?" Newt called on him.

"What is he?" Peter asked.

Several murmurs went up of equal interest.

"L-let me sho-ow you," Newt replied and he turned, backing up so that there was plenty of space between them and him, and he turned himself to a funny angle, giving the mouth of the tube a wide berth. He paused a moment, then, satisfied they'd all moved to give it optimal space, he popped the cork off the end and released...

At first, it was very anticlamatic, seeing as nothing happened. But then there was an outpouring of water from within the tube - like it had packaged up a waterfall. More water than seemed possible poured from the little tube - spraying wildly into the lake from the mouth of it, rushing as hard as an muggle fire department's hoses. James stared with wide, thoroughly fascinated eyes - as did pretty much everyone on the lawns entirely. Even Severus Snape couldn't hide his amazement as suddenly, pouring forth along with the water, there came a creature so big and so thick with muscle that Sirius found himself crying out "whoaaaaa" as though he were Dexter.

In the front half, it was shaped like a horse, except that it was the color of a blueberry with thick, seaweed and wet moss for it's mane and tail. It's hooves were grey and its eyes were empty and black - they looked like sockets that shined somehow. The horse scraped at the earth and tossed its head side-to-side, and they all felt as though it were looking through them, rather than at them, and as it looked, it sent a rumbling of terror through their bellies that consumed them from their toes right up to the tips of their fingers and their noses, all consuming.

That was just the front half!

The back half of the body tapered at the waist into the lower portion of a fish. Similar to how a merman is part man and part fish, this creature was part horse and part fish. It's tail was long and the scales upon it looked sharp and the fins at the tip split into four trailing bits that looked like they had dagger-sharp ends to be wary of. The tail curled about like a spring, holding the creature upright, and as it moved to face first Newt and then the teenagers behind it, it actually dragged it's belly ever so slightly on the carpet as he dragged himself about to face the little class.

Sirius shivered.

"Wicked," whispered James.

"What is he?!" Peter asked again, although more panicked than before.

"Kelpie," breathed Remus, positively awestruck.

"Y-yes, t-ten points to Gryff-ffindor," Newt announced, "For the c-correct naming of the c-creature." He looked around, "A-anyone e-else know wh-what sort of creature he is?" A couple hands went up. "Yes?" Newt nodded at a boy wearing a Hufflepuff tie - the bloke who everyone had expected to be Headboy, actually, a boy named Amos Diggory.

("Of course," Sirius muttered, "House-ism is alive and well...")

"Water demon," said Diggory.

"V-very g-good." Newt was stroking the muzzle of the blue horse snout - it looked most odd, seeing as the Kelpie did not seem like the sort of creature that would much like being petted by anyone at all. "Ten p-point to H-Huffle-p-puff."

Amos Diggory grinned merrily, looking around at his fellow Hufflepuffs, who looked equally pleased. He then added, "They specialize in disguise, Kelpies do."

"Yes," Newt nodded.

"Is this it's natural form?" Lily asked, "Or is this one in this form for a particular reason? It's just such an odd form to take."

Newt shook his head, "The k-kelpies n-natural shape is that what you saw in the-the transp-port tube - clou-oudy w-water. He t-takes the form of st-strange and unusual cre-reatures to cause dis-discussions about whh- what he is... and l-lur adve-venturers in to his l-lair, ben-neath the water, where the v-victim w- w- will inevitably dr-drown or be e-eaten. Al-alright, who wants to p-pet'em?"

There was a long and uneasy pause as they all glanced at one another.

"Go on Pete," Sirius said, shoving Peter forward.

Peter staggered out into the gap between the front line of the students and where Newt Scamander stood with his water demon pony. Peter's eyes were wide, "Me????" he choked, "I - no I couldn't - I -"

"Go on, Pete," James encouraged, nodding.

Peter turned around, trembling, and shuffled slowly toward the giant kelpie, eyes wide.

"What'd you do that for?" James whispered to Sirius so quiet nobody else would hear.

"Figured if it decides to eat him there's enough of him there to keep it busy while we get a head start to run like hell," Sirius whispered back.

James snort-laughed loudly and several heads turned his way. "Sorry," he murmured.

"He - he won't hurt y-you Mr. Pettig-grew," Newt said gently, nodding as Peter neared the creature. The magizoologist mimed holding out his hand to touch the beast and, copying him, Peter reached out a shaking hand. "Good, v-very good."

Peter's fingers touched the blue horsey shoulder. It was wet and a bit slimey, slick like he imagined a dolphin would feel. His eyes were bulging wide with excitement as he pet the thing for several moments. He looked up at Newt, "This is so cool."

Newt grinned, "Y-yes, isn't - isn't it?"

Peter backed up quickly and rejoined the others and James gave him a high-five, grinning, "Good goin', Pete."

"Yeah, good one, Wormy," Sirius agreed, and he mussed up Peter's hair.

Peter beamed proudly - it was everything he'd wished for all summer.

Newt told them more about Kelpies - about the way they changed shapes and why, and some lore about the Lochness Kelpie and various other useful information. He had them sketch the kelpie in it's horse form, and then when the class was very near to over, he led it into the water and the students watched in awe as a merman broke the surface, shrieked a thank you to Newt, and took the horse away beneath the water. Newt teared up just a wee bit and Dougal, who had stayed hovering invisible, clinging to Newt's back, faded into view long enough to wave goodbye to the Kelpie.

"That was a bloody brilliant class," James said dreamily as they headed up the sloping pathway to the dinner in the Great Hall. Lily swung their hands between them. "Absolutely brilliant."

"I loved it," Peter said, excitedly. "Did you see me touch the Kelpie? Did you see it?"

"Good on you Pete," said Sirius, and he petted Peter's head, "Spiffing job."

Peter grinned.