A Counterfeit Warrant
James, Lily, Remus, Sirius, Peter, Marlene, Emmaline, and Frank Longbottom all sat around the table in the Marauders' flat in East London. Downstairs the party time was really going and loud music thumped the floorboards, and the smell of the food filled the air. On the table before the lot of them was an array of things to eat, each of them had brought a plate to share.
"Merlin's beard, Marley," Frank said, eating what had to be his seventh or eighth buttered scone from the box of them Marlene had brought along. "I was famished before we got here, but I'd bloody eat a dozen of these on a full stomach, they're that good." He licked his fingers.
Marlene said, "Slaved over a hot stove for hours to make them, I did."
"She paid the baker and waved her wand once to warm them before we came over," Emmaline corrected.
"Hush Em, you're supposed to have kept that a secret!"
Frank said, "I don't care how you got'em here, only that you did!" He grabbed for another.
Lily cleared her throat, "And I get no recognition for the hand pies?"
"You saw me pack away several of those," Frank said, mouth full and crumbs falling out across his chest. "Don't act like you didn't see me eat more than my share of them, too."
Remus was picking at the crust on his own pie, snapping the edges of the crust off, and nibbling half heartedly at it. His eyes full of concern as he kept glancing at James expectantly every now and again, even as everyone else about the table burst into laughter. Finally, he could take it no more - he was exhausted and in a bit of a bad mood. "What's this meeting for, anyway?"
A hush went over them all. One by one, each of them present turned to look at James, except Lily, who looked down at her plate. She and James had already talked extensively about the subject of the meeting, and had even argued about it for part of the afternoon.
"Regulus Black got the vials of werewolf venom into his possession and has afforded a way to get it back to the Order."
Frank looked surprised, "Seriously?"
Sirius opened his mouth to make his pun, but before he could James had cut him off by actually answering Frank's inquiry without the frill of the joke: "Yes, but it's going to be a bit tricky because to collect them, --"
Sirius burst out, "I'm sure he's only given them to that little toadstool elf, I can just summon --"
"-- we've got to get them out of Gringott's. From the Black Family Vault." James spoke loudly to be heard over Sirius. The result was that the silence that followed the words felt even larger and more empty.
"Obviously, we will need your involvement, Sirius, as a Black has to be the one who opens the vault, but I don't reckon having you waltz into Gringott's is the way to do it. Everyone knows you don't get on with your family, surely the goblins would alert your Mum and the next thing you know we've got half Voldemort's bloody army of Death Eaters banging up the place. It's got to be way more discreet than that. So." James paused, looking about the table at the others. "Let's hear your brilliant plans."
Silence.
They all sat, looking about at one another. Lily looker at James with eyes which conveyed that this was precisely what had worried her when they'd spoken about the task earlier.
"Anyone?"
"Well," said Marlene slowly, "Remember the time that two of the Weasley kids broke in to see the dragon? We could see if he's got any ideas how to do it."
A round of uneasy chuckles broke among them.
Frank said, "We'll have Gideon or Fabian draw up a warrant. Make it an official investigation, I'm sure --"
"No," James cut in. "First off, I don't want it to be anything news worthy. The kind of paperwork it would take to do that is ungodly, and I'm not even sure it's allowed to warrant a search of the vaults at Gringott's. Surely the accusation would have to be gigantic and the Prophet would be all over it. I want something more discreet, something we can keep a secret... which brings me to my second point on this. We're the only Order members that know about Regulus's involvement. I want to keep it that way. The others cannot know."
Frank said, "What if we fake the warrant?"
"Fake the warrant?"
"Yeah. We draw up some official looking rubbish. I've worked on cases with warrants before in training, we can just duplicate one and make some little edits to what it says... Then I'll go with mu Ministry uniform, or you can, Potter, and we'll walk in like we own the place, real confident and smarmy and the goblins will let us in."
Lily's eyes were wide. "You want to counterfeit a Ministry document?"
"Technically it wouldn't be counterfeit," Frank said, "I mean Potter and I both are technically aurors..."
"In training," Lily amended.
"Yeah, what happens if you get caught doing something like that? Surely there's some kind of law against it," Emma spoke up, her eyes twitching between the two boys.
Sirius spoke up, "Plus I want to fucking be involved! It's my bloody vault you lot are breaking into."
"Azkaban," Remus said. They all looked at him. "That's what the punishment for getting caught would be."
They fell silent.
"So don't get caught then," Peter said, speaking for the first time. "And if you do get caught, get yourself out of it. The same as we always did back at school with Filch's office. We hardly ever got caught, but when we did, we got out of it." His voice shook with nervousness as the others looked at him.
"Alright well you go and fetch Peeves to make a distraction, then, Pete, and we'll be ready just in case," Sirius said, sarcastically.
Peter's face turned red.
"No, no," James said, shaking his head, "No, Peter's right. We just won't get caught is all. And we'll get out of it if we do."
Marlene snorted, "That there is a bleedin' airtight plan if I ever heard one."
Sirius grinned at Marlene, "It's as though you've taken the words right out of my head with your mouth, darling."
"Dirty," muttered Remus smirking at Sirius. "Ought I to be jealous?"
They all burst into laughter and Sirius leaned over, grabbing Remus heartily and putting a big wet kiss onto his cheek. "You bleedin' wolf, I fucking love you, barmy idiot."
When the laughter died down, though, there was still the seriousness of the plan to deal with, and it was Emmaline who returned them to the discussion, "So what do you lot do to get out of it? Peeves isn't here nor do I think a poltergeist blowing a raspberry at the goblins will do much to help you out of a life sentence to Azkaban."
"Gods I miss that obnoxious fucker," Sirius said reminiscently.
"Anyone considered the idea of just leaving the venom exactly where it is?" Lily asked, sitting forward.
James sighed, "Evans, we already talked about this."
"Not with everyone else," she argued. "I know you don't like the idea of it, but it seems sort of stupid to go breaking into Gringott's to fetch the vials only to have to protect them when we get them out. Regulus is the only person who knows they're there, yeah? So why don't we just leave them there? They're protected, and if we're having such a rough go of coming up with a way to get in then so will Voldemort's lot -- if they ever find out they're there to begin with."
"You're forgetting that Voldemort's lot includes my mum," Sirius spoke up, "Who can just saunter in there anytime she wishes seeing aa she's the owner of the vault. They find out those vials are in there and it takes less than a second for her to apparate over to Gringott's and fetch them with all the goblin support and legal approval she could ever want. They'd be tripping over themselves to help her get them out."
"Well how often does she go to the Vault?" Marlene asked, "How would they discover where the vials are to begin with? They could sit there collecting dust for ages."
"But if they do find out, the vials are vulnerable," James said, "And there's no stopping the werewolves from infecting all of London."
"They've surely started rebuilding the stock," Remus said. "I mean, it was the full moon last night, even."
"But why give them thousands of vials they've already collected as a head start?" Frank asked. "Better to get them ourselves."
"And do what with them?" Lily asked. "Hide them under the couch?"
"Destroy them," Peter suggested.
James waved a palm at Peter, an expression that said 'exactly' upon his face.
Lily took a deep breath. "I just don't think it's safe. This plan is shaky at best, and I don't think it's worth the risk. We have time, that's all I'm saying. We have time to wait and come up with a better plan."
"We don't, Evans," James argued, "We don't have time. They could go to that vault at any moment."
"She usually sends Kreacher," Sirius said.
They all looked at him.
He shrugged.
"So why don't we send Kreacher?" Emma asked.
"Oh that little toemaggot would rush right off and tell her if we did," Sirius shook his head. "I can control him a wee bit as a member of the house of Black, but I rank dead last in his mind. She could easily command him to tell her and that would be that."
"But by then we'e have the vials," Marlene said.
"But they'd know it was Regulus who put them there," James said, shaking his head. "They can't know it was Regulus. He's the only one who could have deposited the vials to the vault, and if anyone finds out they're there, he's instantly under fire because if he had them to hide them there then he'll have been expected to give them to You Know Who. He'd be killed as a traitor immediately. Which is another reason we have to get the vials out of the vault before Mrs. Black discovers they're there!"
Silence fell over the table once more.
Lily rubbed her eyes and muttered, "Gods you're right. Why are you right?"
James looked about. "Anyone still opposed to getting the vials out?" No responses. "Anyone got a plan better than the counterfeit search warrant?" Again, no responses. "Alright then." James sighed. "Frank, tomorrow at the Center, I'll try at getting a copy of a warrant from the files in Mr. Underhill's office to edit. You find out more about the process of presenting a warrant, so we can do this up official-like. We don't want any questions, we just want to serve the thing, get in and get out, without raising suspicions."
Frank nodded.
They sat in silence again for a couple moments, the weight of their plan sinking around them. Nervous energy seemed to crackle around the table as they all stared at their plates and shared glances amongst each other.
"Who wants pudding?" Lily asked, breaking the tension.
They all laughed as Peter burst out, "ME!"
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