Maren stayed in bed the rest of the day. It was cathartic. She realized she had not been as restful as she should have been for the number of injuries she had, and was glad for the day to do nothing. She tried to think about what Alec had told her, and it did help alleviate some of her guilt. She still felt it, and she felt her grief for Donovan, but it felt less overwhelming.

Alec stopped by before dinner to bring her a new glass bottle of white pills he said were stronger and would help her sleep better. She ate a light dinner in her rooms and took one.

That night, she slept very soundly and was extremely relieved to wake up after the sun had risen. She did not dream at all. She felt more peaceful than she had in ages. She didn't feel happy, but for the first time since leaving the palace, she felt like she might be alright eventually.

She did feel a bit queasy which was unpleasant but thought that was either nerves or a lingering effect from the sleeping pill.

She allowed Jenny to help her dress for breakfast. She was a bit nervous about seeing Jonathan after hiding in her rooms the day before, but she knew he would probably treat her with the same slightly embarrassing kindness as he always had.

When she arrived in the dining room, Alec was the only one there.

"Ah! She's risen from the dead!" he proclaimed with a grin.

She chuckled. "As much as I hate to admit that you're right about anything, a good night's sleep does do wonders."

"Coffee?" he asked.

She nodded and gratefully accepted the cup from Alec, but when she went to drink from it, she recoiled. The smell of the coffee that she normally thoroughly enjoyed suddenly turned her stomach. She set it down, deciding that she probably needed to eat before having any.

"Good morning," Jonathan said as he came into the dining room.

Maren turned to him and smiled. "Good morning."

She decided that if the worst thing about her current situation was that she actually liked the man she was supposed to marry, that wasn't too bad. She was still deeply uncomfortable with the whole thing, but felt that she could at least make the most of the situation.

Jonathan sat beside her at the head of the table. "I'm delighted to see you're feeling better," he said.

She smiled at him. "Thank you."

He suddenly had a very odd expression on his face and seemed to be studying her. She looked away, uncertain as to what he was thinking.

Fortunately, breakfast continued in a pleasant manner. Her stomach still felt a bit "off" but she ate well enough. Although she never did feel like having the coffee and it went untouched.

When they finished, Jonathan surprised her by asking if he could speak with her.

"Of course," she said. "Shall we go to my sitting room?"

He nodded and offered his arm to her. She took it, but began to feel very nervous. Did he want to ask her why she had behaved so oddly? Or had he changed his mind about the wedding? He seemed serious and it made her uneasy.

He waited until they were sitting before speaking.

"I have to tell you something that's going to sound a bit mad, but I promise it's important," he said.

She thought that sounded very ominous, but nodded for him to continue.

"When I was first married, I discovered I have a rather unusual skill. Perhaps it's to do with reading people well, I don't know. But suffice it to say that whenever I encounter a woman who is with child, I can always tell," he said.

Maren could not fathom why he might be telling her this, or why he might think it was important. She stared at him blankly.

"Ah...yes, well, I know what it sounds like but each and every time my first wife was pregnant I could tell before she knew, or at least was certain. I did learn with my daughters-in-law that people I am not married to do not usually appreciate being informed of that fact, so I generally do not comment on the matter. However, I have encountered a situation where I must address it."

He was looking at her expectantly, as though he thought she would understand what he was saying. She did not. Had he perhaps gotten some other woman pregnant and was delicately trying to end their engagement?

He waited for a few moments before continuing. He seemed uncomfortable.

"Maren, I'm fairly certain...well, I know I'm right. You're pregnant," he said.

Her jaw dropped. The thought had not even occurred to her that was what he was trying to say.

"Excuse me?" she cried.

"I am so sorry, I recognize that I am the very last person you would want to hear this from, but I felt it couldn't wait," he said.

He seemed very apologetic, but that was little comfort to her.

"And you've been keeping this to yourself the whole week I've been here?" she cried.

"No, no, I only just saw this morning. I expect it's very early. These things aren't instantaneous, you know," he said.

She was outraged. Of all the possible conversations she ever imagined having about her reproduction, having to convince someone she wasn't pregnant wasn't even on the list.

"Jonathan! I am not pregnant!" she shouted.

He was not at all phased by her anger.

"I am so sorry to be the one to tell you. I'd be furious with me too, but I promise I'm telling you the truth," he said earnestly.

Maren remembered what Alec told her about his father being very irritating to have an argument with. He was correct.

"Jonathan! I cannot be pregnant, and I would like very much for you to cease this line of inquiry!" she shouted.

"Are you certain?"

"Positive!"

She glared at him, and he appeared to be studying her again. Then his face shifted, as though he'd realized something important.

"Oh, Maren, no wonder the business at the checkpoint was so terrifying," he said with great sympathy. "And everything Kieran's done...Gods, I am so sorry you've had to go through that."

"Excuse me?" she asked, beginning to feel alarmed.

"Well, I just see now how much more difficult things have been for you than I thought," he said.

She narrowed her eyes at him. "Whatever you think you know, you don't."

She tried to sound definitive, but she was more and more worried every second.

He ignored her. "Don't worry, I won't turn you in."

"I am sure you are not accusing me of what it sounds like you are accusing me," she snapped.

Her heart was racing, and she had to clench her fists to keep from shaking. Still, somehow she managed to sound annoyed and not frightened.

He held up his hands in a placating gesture. "No, no, I'm not accusing you of anything. I just know you're a Wielder."

She leapt to her feet. "How dare you! Get out of here this instant!" she yelled.

"That was very good. Did you practice that?"

She had. For years, she practiced the perfect outrage to respond to such an accusation. Though she wasn't about to tell him that. Instead, she glared down her nose at him, daring him to say more.

She was very frightened, though. Had she really given herself away that easily?

"Perhaps this will help: I'll confess I told you something of a falsehood the other day. My twin sister, Margot, she was, or, I hope, is, a Wielder."

She narrowed her eyes at him. "She isn't dead?"

"I hope not. Our father was warned that the Trackers were on to her. She ran away. I haven't heard from her since, but I like to think she's still out there," he said in such a calm tone that they might have been discussing the weather.

She wasn't sure she could believe him. It was certainly possible he had invented the story just to get her to confess. Either way, her course of action was clear.

"Get. Out," she hissed.

He ignored her order. "You're very good. I never would have guessed if we hadn't been discussing pregnancy. And, well, I reasoned that if it was a medical matter, you would have just said so. I also saw your face when I asked about Prince Donovan, so I could make some educated guesses about the nature of your relationship, which left just one plausible explanation."

She wanted to slap him.

"I suppose it isn't something you'd be likely to admit to someone you only just met, but I am sorry I frightened you," he said.

She stamped her foot in outrage. "I'm not frightened, I'm furious!"

"I can plainly see you're both," he said. "But please, sit down. You have nothing to worry about, not from me."

"I am not a witch," she snarled.

"No, of course not. I would never use such an ugly term," he said. "I'd also note I could already turn you in if I wanted to, and if it was afraid of you or thought you were dangerous, I certainly wouldn't be sitting here."

He had a point.

"Please, sit," he said.

She studied his face. She saw no malice or fear. He was either telling the truth or a good enough liar that it wouldn't matter what she did. So, she sat, very cautiously.

"I am sorry. You don't have to confirm or deny anything. It really isn't my business," he said.

She nodded curtly. It was the first thing he'd said since arriving in her sitting room that she could agree with.

"Suffice it to say, your assumptions are mutually exclusive," she said.

He was not a fool. He had to know she couldn't be pregnant and a witch.

But he shrugged. "I know what I know. There's a lot of bad information about Wielders, isn't there? I never once saw my sister steal a child or burn down someone's house. I also haven't ever heard anything in the pamphlets or books about Wielders being able to heal people, but my sister could."

She was surprised. She did not think many people knew about a Light Wielder's healing powers.

"So, perhaps the bit about barrenness is wrong, too. Or, there's missing information. For example, what might happen if a Light Wielder and a Darkness Wielder are together? It's possible that's never happened...before."

Maren's eyes went wide. That was not something she had ever considered. Not a lot was known about how Darkness and Light interacted, and she had seen for herself how the forces behaved in unexpected ways together.

She shook her head, dislodging the idea. "An interesting point, but it's irrelevant."

He grimaced. "Maren... I cannot marry you if you're pregnant with a royal baby. That would be perilously dangerous for everyone, especially the baby. And the timing alone...it would be obvious whose child it is," he said.

"How very fortunate then that I am not pregnant," she snapped.

He was completely unbothered by her outrage. It was very irritating.

"You seem remarkably unperturbed for a man who is convinced that the woman he is about to marry is pregnant with another man's child," she said.

He smiled. "Well, I'll admit it would come as some disappointment, but I'm more than compensated by the prospect of a Wielder queen," he said.

Her jaw dropped again. "Of all the very insane things you've said, that one is the most insane of all."

"True, I don't know the Prince that well, but he seems very honorable. I'm sure he'd want to marry you."

She laughed bitterly. "Ha! He couldn't even if he wanted to, and it doesn't matter because even if he did, I cannot ever return to Court."

He frowned. "Because of Kieran? I expect that would pose a problem. But surely, in light of the circumstances, something can be done about him."

She sighed and pinched the bridge of her nose. "If Kieran could have been dealt with, it would have already been done. He had absolutely no qualms about attempting to beat the truth out of me before I left the palace, and I can assure you he only hates me more now."

"Because his checkpoint didn't work?"

She shrugged. "Possibly. But he's probably angrier because Donovan knocked him out cold and I...well, I was trying to escape, and I kneed him in the groin."

She suppressed a smile at that. The situation had been terribly dire, but the memory of his wheezing was still satisfying, even if the aftermath had been terrifying.

"He was furious," she said.

"I expect so," Jonathan said. "But I'll admit I'm pleased to hear you managed to deliver such a blow to him."

Maren gave a small smile at that.

"Correct me if I'm wrong, but can't Prince Donovan use his powers to protect you?" Jonathan asked.

Maren sighed. "No. And the explanation is a terribly long story."

"You have my undivided attention," he said.

She sighed and then decided to tell him. She told him about sneezing at the Selection and being chosen by Donovan, saving his life and discovering that he'd chosen her to prevent Kieran from becoming more powerful, and the many things Kieran did to try to expose her. She did not discuss her relationship with Donovan in any detail, though.

"I don't know if you have any frame of reference for this, but Kieran is exponentially more powerful than Donovan-probably even Donovan and me together. It's...unnatural. But, suffice it to say, magic is not a defense against him," Maren explained.

Jonathan nodded. "Sounds a bit like fighting someone with artillery and all you have is a pistol."

Maren thought that was a decent analogy. "Something like that."

"But in any case, I suppose since he knew I was about to leave, Kieran decided to make one last attempt to expose me. He said he also wanted to prove that Donovan had committed treason by helping me. Donovan intervened and got me away without Kieran getting any proof, but it was clear I needed to leave immediately," she said, finishing her story. "And you know the rest."

He looked genuinely sorry. "That's quite an ordeal."

She sighed. The whole thing had been exhausting, but she had also had some of the very best times in her life at Court. She had close friends and friendly acquaintances, and for the first time in a very long time saw someone appreciate her powers. She had gone from someone who shrunk from attention to someone who could be comfortable with it. And, of course, she had found out what it was like to be in love and to be loved in return.

"It's complicated," she said finally. There was no other way to summarize how she felt about her time at Court.

Jonathan nodded. He seemed to understand she had conflicting feelings about the entire thing.

"But you see, regardless of any conditions you believe I may be suffering from, I cannot go to Court," she said.

"You do not have to. You're under no obligation to have a baby even if you are pregnant."

That was true. Possibly, one of the only positive impacts of a society that asked for occasional prostitution of some women was that such things were relatively simple to handle, at least for the nobility.

Only, Maren wasn't sure she could take that route. She had never considered it before-after all, what would be the point of that-but if she was pregnant-and she wasn't, so it was purely hypothetical anyway-but if she was, that would be something rather amazing. She wasn't sure she could end the pregnancy.

And even if she could, did she want to? If she was pregnant-which she wasn't-but if she was, it was Donovan's baby. She couldn't in good conscience make that decision without him even if she wanted to end the pregnancy, and she was quite certain she did not.

So, the next question. Was there any possible merit to what Jonathan was saying?

Her instinct was a complete rejection of the notion. But she did think that Jonathan would not have even mentioned it if he wasn't fairly certain. So if she put aside any magical modifications to her physiology, was it possible? She didn't pay close attention to such things, it having been irrelevant the vast majority of her life. But once she did a bit of math, she realized it was possible. Not conclusive. But possible.

"You love him very much, don't you?" Jonathan asked.

He had been sitting quietly, giving Maren time to think, and she had nearly forgotten he was still there. But he spoke gently, and without any reproach.

She nodded. There was no reason to deny it.

"If I may offer some advice?" he asked.

"I don't think I'm really in a position to refuse you," she said.

"Talk to Alec before you make any other decisions. Or, if you prefer, I can send for another physician. But there's not much point in trying to determine 'what if' when there's a relatively simple way of getting confirmation."

Maren sighed. "That is rather difficult advice to argue with."

"I thank you," he said with amusement. "As I said, if I'm wrong, and you aren't pregnant or if you become not pregnant, I will apologize profusely, and we can marry and never speak on the matter again. If not, then...well, I believe that's between you and the Prince."

"I accept the validity of your point," she said.

He asked, "Shall I have Alec come to you?"

"Please," she said.

It would possibly be an awkward thing to ask of Alec, but either way, he would hear about it, so it didn't matter.

"Regardless of the outcome, please know you are welcome to stay here as long as you like, and I'm happy to help you however I can," he said.

"I appreciate that," she said. She really did.

He smiled at her and then began walking out of the room, but he stopped short of the door. "Are you feeling alright? If you're nauseous, I could have some ginger tea sent up."

She couldn't help but laugh. "I'm fine. Has anyone ever told you that you are so kind, it's irritating?" she asked.

He laughed. "Actually, yes."

She sighed. "Thank you, Jonathan." She thought it likely he would send up the ginger tea anyway.