A/N: HEAVY HEAVY *HEAVY* TRIGGER WARNING! My hands were shaking by the end of writing this. It's shorter, but good. If you cannot deal with death, self negativity, self starvation, and self harm, I suggest you stay clear of this chapter.

Xelqua flew out of the house, eagerly trying to get away from Xisuma. He flew straight to the Watchers and called for their retreat. As soon as they all got back to the Slip Zone, he went straight for his room. He collapsed onto the large bed, head into the pillow, tears streaming down his face, wings forming a protective barrier around his body.

Soft sounds of his cries echoed through the room as a million thoughts raced through his head, each one worse than the last. He heard footsteps coming toward the bed, and then a depression on the bed. Strong arms soon wrapped him up, going under his wings and hugging the actual person.

"Go away," said Xelqua.

He didn't want to see anyone right now. Not even Aurum.

The arm didn't move though. It stayed wrapped around him, pulling him closer.

"Xelqua," said Aurum, his voice a mix of emotions. Concern, sadness, weariness.

Xelqua just further curled up into his wings.

"Xelqua, please. Just talk to me. What happened?"

"Please just go away Aurum!"

"I'm not going away until you tell me what is going on."

Xelqua snapped out of bed.

"JUST GO AWAY!" He screamed.

Aurum flew back to the entrance of the room. He looked taken aback. Xelqua had never yelled at him. He never yelled, period.

"Xelqua this isn't like you. However, if you need time, I'll give you time." With that, Aurum left him.

Xelqua collapsed back onto his bed, tears coming in full force now. He couldn't stop them. He didn't want to stop them. This is what he deserved. Every single one of these emotions. He killed someone who was near defenseless. He got Xanthous banned.

He was a horrible, terrible person.

The Watchers were horrible, terrible people.

Xelqua didn't come out of his room much for the next week. Aurum tried to check on him, but Xelqua pushed him away each and every time. He kept trying though, and though Xelqua would never admit it, it made him feel even a little bit better to know that someone cared that much.

One night Xelqua didn't have the energy to push him away, Aurum came into his room and climbed into the bed with him. Xelqua tried to turn away from him but Aurum held his shoulders.

"I just want to know what happened. Please tell me. It'll help. I promise."

Xelqua didn't say anything, just curled up into his wings again.

"I don't want to push you. Just whatever you're comfortable with. But please tell me. I swear that it will do a world of good for you. And if you need someone to cry into, I'm right here."

Xelqua inhaled a long shaky breath, a single tear falling down his cheek.

"I went to find Xanthous," he began, voice shaky, "and I found where he was. A cabin in the middle of the woods. In front, was Biffa, Xisuma's best friend. He told me that I had to get through him. I laughed it off and began to fight."

He stopped to inhale a slow, labored breath.

"I told him, to make it fair, that I would only use one power. So I did. I didn't fly. I used Bellum's curse. I got a hold of the arrow he shot at me, turned it around...and- and..."

His voice trailed off, more tears coming dow his face.

"I turned the arrow on him, and struck him with it. I killed him. He didn't need to die. I didn't have to fight. I'm a Watcher for Notch's sake! I could have just put him to sleep. I chose to fight though. Then Xisuma came out. Hi- his voice. It was pure raw despair. I made him feel that way. It was me."

Another breath.

"Then, we went back inside. I found Xanthous."

He let out a sharp, demented, laugh.

"I found him," he said shaking, a wide, conflicted grin playing on his face, "he was there. Pacing. Evil Xisuma was coming out. Remeber him? Remeber how we used to worry he would come out? He was trying to calm himself."

Xelqua picked up a dagger, a remnant of his past self, twirling it in his hands.

"Xisuma, he- he was furious."

The man was back to a nervous wreck, the insanity that had taken over now gone.

"He was yelling at him. Saying that he ruined the server. And then he banned him."

Xelqua threw the dagger as hard as he could, loding it in the wall across from him.

"HE BANNED HIM!" he yelled, tears streaming down his face.

He fell back into Aurum's lap, tears streaming down his face, head buried in the comforter of his bed.

"Is that it?" Aurum whispered.

"Xisuma saved me," Xelqua whispered in response, "he destroyed the curse."

Xelqua lost his grip again, falling back into tears.

Aurum took him, and layed the sandy-haired man down next to him, before also lying in the bed, staring at the broken Watcher in front of him.

The next day they just stayed there. Xelqua couldn't do anything. He didn't want to eat. He didn't want to drink. He just wanted an escape.

Aurum had to leave momentarily to converse with Gem about what to do.

"He's as good as gone," Gem whispered, staring in through the door.

"No," Aurum refuted, "no. He'll get through this."

"Will he?" Gem shot back. "Look at him. He's death incarnate."

Aurum shook his head sadly, leaving his brother to go back to his struggling boyfriend.

Another day went by.

And another.

And another.

No response. No activity. Xelqua had given up. The only motion were the nightmares that came during the night, causing him to shoot awake, lost in memory.

Aurum struggled to get him back to sleep. But he never left his side. He couldn't. He was scared that if he left, so would Xelqua. So he had to hold on, even if Xelqua tried to push him away.

The fourth day, something happened.

"Do you know what's funny?" Xelqua whispered.

Aurum glanced over at him, hopeful.

"Xisuma destroyed my curse, but he only sent me spiraling into something much much worse. At least with Bellum's curse, I was happy. Or was I? I haven't been happy in this hellhole for years."

"Xelqua, please calm down." Aurum pleaded.

"I stayed for you. You kept me grounded. But maybe that wasn't a good thing. Maybe if I had left earlier, things would have been different."

"Don't talk like that. You're going to be ok?"

"Will I?" asked Xelqua, voice breaking, a tear running down his cheek, "will I ever be ok?"

"You will," Aurum assured, "you're my Grian. You'll get through this."

"Maybe," Xelqua started, "maybe I don't want to."

He stood up, taking staggering steps towards the wall.

"Xeluqa what are you doing?"

"MAYBE I DON'T WANT TO BE HERE! MAYBE I HAVE TO TAKE MATTERS INTO MY OWN HANDS!" he yelled, pulling the dagger from the wall.

"XELQUA NO!" Aurum yelled, lunging across the room.

But it was too late.

With a scream of agony, Xelqua plunged the dagger into his chest, before collapsing onto the floor, blood pooling around him.

A/N: I warned you, didn't I? You have no one to blame but yourselves. You chose angst. I gave you the choice. You denied it. 

Now I'll go away for another month or so. I'll be back.

Vote if you enjoyed.

Darky out.