Chapter Six

Phil's POV

Words: 2079

I spent most of the night questioning everything. My thoughts were practically having a rave in my mind. What just happened? Where was Dan? Are PJ and Chris together? Since when did Anton like me? Where was Dan? Why did I push Anton away? Why did I like the kiss in the first place? Was it a drunken mistake? Where was Dan?

Dan's whereabouts had me most upset. I was really looking forward to an evening with him - to get to know the mysterious boy that others didn't. I hardly knew him yet I wanted to know the gorgeous human being. I frowned - did I want to let someone in so early in my fresh start? Every time it had happened in the pastI ended up getting my heart broken. Dan seems different. Yet didn't they all seem different? The conflict was irritating because I wanted to talk to the boy so bad.

I thought Anton seemed different but he ended up handling his feelings for me by beating me to a pulp. Not very romantic. At least Dan isn't beating me up ... that didn't mean he had feeling for me however. As if someone like that would have feelings for me. He could have any girl he wanted. He was probably straight too. I sighed and tried to shake off the disappointment I was feeling. I still liked him so friends was a good aim. I needed to stop letting people so easily into my heart. 

I stared blankly at the ceiling as the swarm of questions kept its pace running around my brain. Eventually I felt my eyes droop and I fell asleep - dreaming of boys with coffee eyes. 

~

I frowned as I walked. I thought Dan would meet me. I know I didn't know him too well but I was hoping to see him and ask him where he had gone the night before. I sighed and let Muse beat against my ear drums as I neared the school gates.

Come ride with me
Through the veins of history
I'll show you how god
Falls asleep on the job

And how can we win
When fools can be kings
Don't waste your time
Or time will waste you

No one's gonna take me alive
The time has come to make things right
You and I must fight for our rights
You and I must fight to survive

As I saw the gates get closer I huffed and put my iPod away, missing the sound already. I looked around but couldn't see Dan anywhere. I furrowed my brow but stopped when I saw two smiling idiots waving frantically at me. I grinned and walked over to PJ and Chris. "Hey guys, how are you two this morning?" I smirked. They both blushed, realising I had seen their little escapade. 

"Brilliant." Chris grinned, leaning into PJ slightly. Realisation dawned on me and I beamed at the couple.

"Aw finally guys." I grinned - hugging both of them. The heat didn't leave their rosy cheeks which I found adorable.

"Thanks." Chris replied happily.

"So, what happened to you last night?" PJ frowned. The smiled left my face and I screwed it up in disgust. They noticed and a concerned expression took over their faces.

"It was um- it was Anton." I started and noticed the fire behind Chris' eyes. I smiled a little at how protective he was over me. It felt nice to finally have a friend like that. "He sort of ... kissed me." I cringed.

"He WHAT?" Chris flared.

"You okay?" PJ asked in concern.

"Did he hurt you?" Chris questioned. I smiled and shook my head.

"It's fine, I told him I didn't want anything to do with him ... it's just ..." I trailed off, hesitating to end that sentence.

"What?" PJ asked curiously.

"Well ... did either of you see Dan last night before Anton dragged me off?" I asked. PJ shook his head but Chris looked to be in thought before speaking up.

"Yeah ... he looked kinda pissed." 

"Pissed? As in drunk?" I asked in surprise.

"No I mean angry, like pissed off." Chris explained, looking confused.

"Oh ... wonder why." I sighed and leaned against the bench they were sitting on.

Both Chris and PJ looked worried but changed topic. We talked comfortably for five minutes until PJ spotted something out of the ordinary and expressed his confusion. "Um Phil?" PJ asked slowly.

"Mhm?" I mumbled, not looking up.

"Why is Howell glaring at you?" He asked uneasily. My eyes widened and I lifted my head to meet angry eyes a distance away. As soon as he noticed me watching him he put on a neutral mask and walked off.

"What was that about?" Chris asked.

"I have no idea ..." I said, trying to hide the hurt and confusion in my voice.

"Um Phil. He just blanked you ... I think that means he's going back to emotionless statue." PJ admitted sadly.

"What?" I exclaimed. Did Dan not want to be friends with me? What the fuck did I do?

"He was friends with someone I knew a while ago. He saved her from her abusive boyfriend at the time. They hung out pretty much every day and he seemed to genuinely like her but ... one day he kept his distance and glared at her then ... blank. He acted as if they'd never even met." PJ explained.

I felt sickness in my gut. What did I do to make him glare at me? Why did he even talk to me in the first place? Was the reason why he left last night? I felt anger build in me for a few reasons. The thought of being led on and hoaxed by him into being his friend only to be dumped like yesterday's garbage fuelled a long building fire inside me. I hated those who built up my hopes only to tear them down.

I was sick of being thrown away, beat up, shouted at, made fun of, and most of all being taken advantage of. He thought that he'd had it bad - enough for him to become all mysterious and try cut himself off from the world? Did he even know how much a friendship meant to me? It made me furious. I hadn't done anything wrong this time.

"Lets get to class." I said bitterly. Both Chris and PJ looked at me worriedly but they didn't question it. I was like a thunder storm all day - sometimes unintentionally snapping at the teachers and earning myself a detention or two. Brilliant! It was no surprise that Dan had been ignoring me all day. Back to the Lonely Prince I guess.

At the end of the day I went to the detention classroom. On the way I breathed in and out, letting most of the anger drain from me. I put on a half smile as I knocked on the door - I honestly didn't want to make any more trouble for myself.

A teacher opened up and eyed me curiously before taking my detention slip and pointing me to a desk. I looked up and grit my teeth as I saw only one other person. Of course it had to be Dan. I avoided eye contact and sat as far away from him as possible. He didn't even look in my direction.

I felt my anger soar but fought hard to suppress it. Why did they all turn out like this? I thought this time things would finally be better. I spent an hour doing the given work before trying hard not to slam it down on the teacher's desk at the end. I stormed out of the class room and started on quickly trying to get home and seethe in silence. 

Dan's POV

Staying about from Phil was surprisingly hard. I wanted to be as near to him as possible. I couldn't help stealing glances at his perfect face every now and then - it was too tempting. I loved his hair, his eyes, his innocent face and all around beauty. Today however he looked miserable and I hated it. Was that my fault?

The more the day went on the more I felt guilty about blanking him. He looked awful and knowing that I was the reason behind it made me feel like shit. To be honest I hadn't given him a reason as to why I was avoiding him. He probably only thought of me as a friend anyway. My heart sunk. He was the definition of perfect and I was pushing him away like everyone else.

When he walked into detention that afternoon I was very surprised though I hid it well. He looked partly alright when he came in but when he set eyes on me I could see the anger. I hated it but I was very good at masking how I felt.

I spent the whole detention staring at Phil's back. I wanted to be friends - friends were better than nothing. I knew I'd have to apologise for blanking him and tried to prepare a speech for when he was done. I took a deep breath and quickly followed after him once he'd finished his work.

"Phil!" I called out. He stopped for moment but then continued walking - fists clenched angrily at his sides. I ran after him and tried to reach out a stop him but he shrugged me off. I sighed in annoyance and sped up to block his path. He glared daggers at me and crossed his arms expectantly - waiting for me to give him the reason for stopping him.

"Look I'm sorry." I started.

"For what?" Phil snapped. I was a little confused as to why he was this angry. I didn't think it would affect him this way.

"Why are you so angry?" I asked, ignoring his question for a moment. It was obviously the wrong thing to do based on Phil's reaction. His arms dropped to his sides, he rolled his eyes and pushed past me. "PHIL WAIT! I mean why are you this angry? I didn't think you'd hate me this much." I tried to reason desperately. 

He suddenly whipped round. I didn't expect to see such hurt in his eyes. I felt my stomach drop. "You wanna know why I'm so angry Howell?" He snapped. I swallowed nervously. "Look you may have had it bad and that's why you're lonely or whatever but don't think you're so special!" A tear escaped his eye. I stood in silent shock. "I had the worst life until I moved here and met Chris and PJ. Then old memories came back to haunt me in the form of Anton, one of the ones who inflicted the most pain. I was bullied a hell of a lot - for being gay, an emo or for even just existing. What do you think that does to a person? Just making friends is a hard thing for me to do and you being an ass after leading me on is no accomplishment so just leave me alone!" Phil's exclaimed and turned and walked away. 

I stood frozen in place, feeling like a complete ass. I had ignored him because of my own feelings which he was oblivious to. I didn't want him to think I was that shallow. I hated the thought of others hurting him. I wanted to hug him and take away the pain.

I sighed and raked a hand through my hair in frustration. I'm such a dick. Phil's words rattled through my brain until I latched onto something that made anger flood through my being. Anton. I stormed outside and scanned the area for a certain dick head. I quickly spotted Anton with his group of friends. I could practically hear his bragging from here.

I grit my teeth and walked up to him. He noticed me right away and stopped mid sentence to smirk at me. His friends looked a little surprised at my appearance - due to me being the lonely twat or whatever they called me. "I need to speak to you." I spat. Everyone was silent. Anton raised an eyebrow but nodded smugly. He walked past me, gesturing for me to follow. We walked round the corner where no one could hear us. I watched Anton arrogantly lean against the wall. "You wanted to talk?" He asked.

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