Chapter Seven

Phil's POV

Words: 2798

I was honestly shocked with myself. I didn't know I could get that angry. I let out a breath and tried to summon a sense of calm as I approached my friends. I was still trying to wrap my head around the fact that I had just left Dan there with the memory of me screaming at him. I was angry yes, but a little embarrassed. I didn't need to him to see the vulnerable side of me so soon. I smiled weakly as I joined Chris and PJ. 

"Hey Phil, you okay?" PJ asked curiously.

"'Course." I smiled. I sat down with them on the bench, trying to distract myself with a different topic. However Chris jumped in before I could say anything. 

"Don't look now, the Prince is outside and he does not look happy." Chris chuckled. I rolled my eyes and avoided contact. I really didn't want Dan to come over after my little display. I felt drained of energy and didn't know if I could handle another go at him for being an asshole. I watched Chris and PJ's expressions instead. Suddenly they both frowned.

"What, what is it?" I asked.

"He's talking to Anton ..." Chris said, looking unsure. Curiosity got the better of me and sure enough I saw Anton trailing Dan as they left they rounded the corner. Oh shit.

"I'll be right back." I muttered and jumped up to head after them. I was not missing this, I needed to know what they were going to talk about. If they were going to plan how to make my life a misery it would be nice to know what to look out for. I quietly approached the corner and as I got closer, I heard their voices. I kept my back to the wall and listened carefully to their conversation. 

"You wanted to talk?" Anton asked. I could hear the smug in his voice.

"Who the fuck do you think you are?" Dan suddenly hissed. I stiffened in surprise. 

"What are you talking about." Anton asked; it sounded like he knew exactly what Dan was talking about.

"I'm talking about Phil. How could you do that to him? You're a fucking waste of oxygen and people like you don't deserve to walk the earth. Manipulating people for your own gain, how many times have you broken his heart?" Dan asked furiously. I was shocked and frozen to the spot. What is he doing? Why was he sticking up for me? I pushed the fluttering in my chest away, I couldn't forgive him just yet. 

There was a moment of silence before Anton spoke up again. "Why so defensive Howell? Have a little crush do we? I don't blame you, he's quite intriguing." I heard him chuckle cruelly. My fists clenched tight at my sides. I waited for Dan to reply with, "Don't be ridiculous, we're just friends!" but he was silent.

"What's wrong Daniel? Cat got your tongue? Do your parents not approve of your little crush? ... Oh wait, what parents? I remember, the ones who ran away and left you behind." Anton taunted. I felt sorry for Dan and for the fact he had to endure Anton's taunting. I could feel the anger weakening because of how he had stood up for me.

"Don't you dare talk about them." Dan said through gritted teeth.

"Hit a nerve did I?" He was definitely smirking. The smug bastard.

"You're getting off topic. What the hell do you want with Phil?" Dan asked seriously.

"Oh honey, Phil is mine! I own his heart. He still has feelings for me and I'm going to show him that he needs me and you and your little crush won't get in my way." He sneered. Dan? Crush? Me? I felt slightly dizzy with the information.

"You don't own anyone. He's his own person and I'm pretty sure he's had enough of you, now leave him alone or I'll give you a bruise to remember!" Dan spat. I felt my heart clench - why did Dan care so much?

"Someone's jealous." Anton chuckled wickedly. "As you can see from our little session last night Phil likes me." I had had enough.

I walked round the corner, fists clenching and unclenching in fury. Dan's back was turned to me and Anton was leaning against the wall with a smug expression. However as soon as he saw me it wiped straight off. I glared at him Dan noticed they had company and turned round. When he saw me he went a little pale. 

"Like you?" I hissed, scowling at Anton. 

"Come on Philip, you know you loved it." Anton's cocky attitude returned. 

"I'll never be yours Anton, all feelings are gone. I don't like you, so get that into your thick skull!" I snarled.

I turned and started to walk away, not wanting to spend a second longer in his presence. "Say what you like faggot, you'll come running back to me-" there was sudden cracking noise and I swung round to see Anton on the floor cradling a bloody nose. Dan stood over him intimidatingly, a fire in his eyes. I swallowed, shit did he break his nose?

"Ow." Anton snapped before getting up and wiping some blood away with the back of his hand. He turned his glare to me and spoke up, "I will get you Lester, bodyguard or not!" He smirked then swaggered past the both of us - seemingly unfazed. I watched him until I was sure he was gone then turned to Dan. He was looking nervously at the ground. I was so confused. Why had he stuck up for me? Especially after my little fit. 

I didn't have anything to say, so instead I gave him a small half smile. He looked a little taken aback but he smiled back. Without another word, I walked back round the corner and over to Chris and PJ. I noticed that almost every pair of eyes were on me - probably because I had came out after Anton and his bloody nose. I ignored them all and re-joined Chris and PJ.

"Did you do that?" Chris could hardly contain his laughter. I shook my head and they both looked expectantly for an explanation.

"It was Dan." I sighed and they looked surprised.

"Dan?" PJ repeated. I nodded before turning just in time to watch as Dan walked out from behind the wall with a small smile on his face. Once he noticed the stares he went blank again. We made eye contact and the sides of his mouth tugged upwards for a split second before walking away.

I couldn't help but smile. Things seemed to be going on a more normal path ... except for all the Anton drama of course. I was still a little confused as to why Dan had stood up for me. Also, why hadn't he denied that he had a crush on me? The thought made my cheeks burn. For god sake I was honestly screwed with that boy. I wanted to know why he had ignored me all day - surely there was a story behind that.

~

I started walking up the street when suddenly my name was called. I tensed once I recognised it. I turned round and watched as Dan jogged over to me. "Hey." I said quietly.

"Hey ... um Phil, look there was a little misunderstanding, and I'm so sorry I ignored you today. I'm disgusted to hear how people treated you because I think you're amazing! Can we please start again?" He asked hopefully. I was frozen to the spot, not quite sure how to respond. Did he just call me amazing? My mouth tried to form coherent words.

"U-um yeah of course." I stuttered. Dan grinned at me, showing off his perfect teeth and cute dimples. He was too cute to be legal. We both walked in the direction of our neighbourhood. 

"Do you wanna come over?" Dan offered. He was asking me over to his HOUSE? I considered it for a moment. Even though he was thoroughly confusing, I wanted to uncover some of his mystery. Dan Howell was too intriguing and too beautiful and I just wanted to know everything about him. 

"Um, sure. I'll text my mum, maybe we could both do some explaining." I suggested timidly and he nodded in understanding. I pulled my phone out and sent a quick text then followed Dan into his apartment. 

It was similar to mine - possibly cleaner. The walls were a cream colour and framed posters and postcards were hung on the walls. I searched for pictures of relatives but not one picture of a person was to be seen. We entered a small white living room with simple white sofas, a small glass coffee table, and flat screen TV. Again, the walls were covered in posters, drawings and post cards. I took a closer look at the sketches, appreciating the amazing pencil detail. It was of a woman, a beautiful woman who looked to be in her late thirties and she was smiling brightly for the artist. In another drawing was a man who looked to be in his early forties. He was handsome too and was smiling cheerfully. The detail was so precise and stunning. I wondered if they were his parents and where they were now.

"So do you live with anyone?" I asked, trying to start conversation.

"Nope, just me." He sighed. I turned to him in surprise and saw a sad look in his eyes. If I looked closely I could probably find small splashes of cinnamon against the hazel. As always his face stayed blank

"Am I allowed to ask where your parents are?" I asked cautiously.

"They left when I was twelve, I grew up with my nan. She died when I was fifteen - she left her fortune to me. I don't know what happened to my parents but the police came to my house one night with my mother's necklace and my father's wallet and said they were missing. They could still be alive but I doubt they are. I don't like false hope." He sighed, his eyes shone with unshed tears.

"I'm sorry." I whispered.

"For what? It's not your fault." He smiled and slowly let the sadness vanish.

"Do you want to go to my room?" He suggested. I nodded my head and followed him down a small hallway to a door at the end. He twisted the handle and walked inside, me at his heels. I looked around and nearly drowned in the amazing scent lingering in the air. It smelt of him and it made me go weak at the knees. His room was amazing. Each wall was charcoal grey except for one which was a hand painted mural of the beach and a silhouetted boy walking along it. I stared at it in awe.

"Did you paint this?" I asked. He smiled and nodded. I let my finger travel across his art work, tracing a coral pink starfish discarded on the sand next to a pile of rocks. After a while of admiring, I turned to Dan who was looking through his drawers. 

"I just need to change quickly." He said and pulled out a black top with the white eclipse ring on it - the one he'd worn on the first day I saw him. Momentarily forgetting my presence, he pulled his shirt over his head, revealing his tan stomach. I couldn't help but stare at his chest before trailing down to a slight v-line. Once I realised my actions, I blushed and quickly turned away.

A warning would have been nice. I tried to suppress my blush. I turned round once he had finished and he smiled goofily at me. I couldn't help but return it. 

"Right so, explaining." Dan started, flopping down on his bed and putting his arms behind his head. I couldn't help but notice how his arms flexed in the process and revealed his slight arm muscle. Not to mention how his shirt got pulled up, revealing his cheeky v-line once again. Was he trying to kill me?

"Do you want to go first? Questions wise?" I asked.

"Okay .... how many times have you been, um, bullied?" He asked. I closed my eyes, taking a deep breath. I readied myself to explain. "If you're uncomfortable with telling me you don't have to." He added. I smiled at his thoughtfulness but shook my head.

"No it's fine. It started in my first year of secondary school. I was a pretty normal kid in primary but I always found myself hanging out with girls a lot, yet I never had a romantic interest in them. In first year I discovered that I was bi, I told one of my best friends, Lisa. We had been such close friends and I didn't expect her to react like she did. She told everyone. They all laughed and teased me, repeating the same words." I frowned. 

"Thankfully my mum was offered another job and I was more than happy to leave. I went to the next school, I promised myself that I'd keep it a secret. Unfortunately rumour went round from my old school and it spread fast. They all whispered and pointed like I wasn't there. I spent a year and half there, the worst I'd gotten was a bruise from being shoved into a locker. Mum and I moved again but things really got bad at my next school. I was getting older and the kids my age or up looked at me in disgust and that's when the physical abuse started. I don't know how the rumour kept managing to catch up with me. I think someone from one of my old schools enjoyed spreading it on purpose - never found out who though." I sighed, feeling another surge of anger.

"I moved two more schools after that until I came here. Things were immediately better. I didn't know how it happened but as soon as I met Chris and PJ and they said they were gay it felt normal. No one seemed to care, apparently when Chris and PJ came out no one really cared that much and that's why I like it here. I just wish Anton wasn't around - he could spread stories and ruin my life. I don't want to move again." I finally finished.

"Wow." Dan said and looked over at me. "I'm sorry to hear that, you're an amazing person Phil. I don't know many people as strong as you." He complimented and I smiled bashfully. 

"Okay your turn." I said seriously, he nodded and waited patiently. "Well, why do you block everyone out, what happened to make you hide from the world?" I asked, scared in case I was prying too much. He sighed and sat back, probably choosing his words carefully.

"Well first it was the loneliness of not having anyone at home. I had plenty of friends at school but they were never real friends ... they just liked me for how I looked. I went out with this girl called Charlotte. She was my girlfriend for three months before I found out she was cheating on me. It took me a year until I could finally trust someone with my heart again. Her name was Isla and she was caring and sweet but after a month or two of us being together she told me she was moving away. Not long after that she died from a car collision on the way to her new home. I felt as though my heart was torn to pieces. I didn't talk to anyone and my "friends" eventually gave up on me because they didn't really care. " He paused to frown thoughtfully.

"I thought my heart couldn't take anymore so I shut myself off. Then I saw this boy abusing a girl from my school and I chased him away. She thanked me and we became friends, it was a shock since I was very antisocial and people at school were shocked to see me with another human being. They asked too many questions though and the girl, who's name was Sarah became uncomfortable. A couple days later she had a new boyfriend and I felt the last of my trust just disappear. I told her that I preferred to be alone and that we couldn't be friends, I'll never forget the crushed look on her face. I ignored any sort of love interest from then on. After too many disappointments I couldn't take it anymore. Then ..." He trailed off.

"Then ...?" I encouraged, heart beating fast.

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