My dad leaves the hospital to go look for Ian while my mom stays behind to persuade the hospital to give us an update on Baker. I keep having panic attacks so severe that they have to give me meds to keep me calm. Whenever I close my eyes, I picture Baker lying on the floor, his face beaten to the point of being unrecognizable, his hair coated in his own blood. And I keep going back to the moment I felt his pulse. Was there something there? I wish I knew more about how to react in an emergency.

Beth, on the other hand, was a total rockstar. She handled everything like a champ, and the doctor actually praised her for not letting anyone touch him until the EMTs arrived. Once the hospital does give us an update on Baker, we learn that he suffered an orbital fracture, severe bone bruising in the face, and a broken nose, all of which should heal in time. He also lost a lot of blood, so he had to have a blood transfusion. They took care of most of these things right away. But he also suffered a very severe traumatic brain injury. The swelling is so intense that the fluid is causing extreme pressure against his skull.

I don't understand what this means, but I know it can't be good. When I ask, the doctors say that they had to put him in a medically induced coma to minimize any brain damage. I ask the doctor when he'll be out of the coma, but they say it's impossible to know for sure. They're going to monitor him and see how he does. It could be a few days, weeks, or even months. But what scares me the most is there's a chance it might be too late. That the damage is already done, and he's already gone. They'll be able to know more in the coming days.

Once I'm out of the emergency room, my mom leads me upstairs to Baker's unit. When I walk in, I see his eyes are closed. There are bandages around his head and tubes in his throat to help him breathe. His face is horribly swollen and bruised, an ugly mix of deep purples and dark blues. I hold his hand and cry, not even caring that my mom and Beth are here to see. I've never been more scared of anything in my life than I am of losing him to this.

While we're visiting Baker, my dad is driving all over town looking for Ian. The police are searching for him as well, as they have a ton of questions. The house has been marked up with police tape as they continue investigating the death of Jay Scott. They've already labeled his death as a homicide, but the real questions are who killed him and why? The police come to the hospital to talk to me, and I tell them everything I know. How Jay Scott was an abusive father. How Baker has proof of the abuse going back years. How he was planning on getting guardianship of his brother when he turned eighteen.

Eventually, my mom has to go and take care of Auggie for a while. She asks if I want to come with her, or if I want to stay with Baker. I'm conflicted, because I don't want to leave him. I'm afraid if I do, it'll be for the last time. But I'm exhausted. Drained of every ounce of energy. And since it's very clear that Baker will not be waking up for a while, I decide to go home with my mom. The nurses promise to call us if there are any changes, and Beth, my mom, and I leave the hospital.

When we get home, my mom takes care of the babysitter while I go upstairs. Beth goes home to her house, promising she'll be back in a couple hours with food. It's dark outside now. Very late. Way passed dinner time. But I'm not even hungry. If I tried to eat right now I'd probably throw it up. So I curl up in bed and cry some more, feeling so hopeless. I reach over and grab my phone, opening Baker's text thread and going back through all our old conversations. The chemistry questions. The quiet flirting. The long talks into the night about everything and nothing. And it hurts.

My fingers reach up and find my promise ring, and I squeeze it in the dark. He promised to always be here. He swore he'd never leave. He even showed me the place I could find him if he ever did.... Wait. I sit up straight in my bed, staring ahead at the wall, my mouth hanging open. Then I look at the time on my phone. Almost three in the morning. I look out my window and see my dad's truck is still gone, which means he's still out looking for Ian. I bet half the town is out searching for him right now. But they don't know what I know. They don't know about the secret sanctuary.

I debate with myself for a while on if I should call my dad and tell him about it. But I decide against it. Baker wouldn't want the police to barge in on his brother if he was there hiding. He'd want someone to gently coax him out. So I jump out of bed, feeling like I have a purpose for the first time since this morning, and throw on a pair of jeans and a sweatshirt before sneaking out of the house to go to my car. That's when I realize I left my car at Baker's house. Swearing under my breath, I decide on a whim to grab my mom's keys, knowing there's no way she'll get angry with me about it right now.

As I pull out of the driveway, I wonder if I'll even be able to find this place in the dark. I've only been there once, and only during the daytime. For a single second I pull out my phone, thinking I can just text Baker and ask him where it is. Then my stomach sinks when I remember he can't help me. I'm on my own this time. So with a pang in my chest, I drive to Hayden Lake, parking outside the vacant lot where I dropped Baker off that first time. I pocket my keys, pull out my phone, turn the light on, and get moving.

I'm a little worried someone is going to see me and question why I'm out in this random field in the middle of the night. But that's the thing. It's the middle of the night. Most people are in bed, and the ones looking for Ian are out searching around his house in Coeur d'Alene. No one would think to look this far. But no one knows what I do. I make it to the tree line and take a breath, knowing no one would see my flashlight even if they did drive through at this hour. Then I climb over broken limbs and large rocks, trying not to trip over anything as I search for the old shack.

It's early May, and while it's warm during the day, it's still pretty cold at night. I wish I had a thicker coat as my body starts to shiver. And then I wonder if Ian thought to bring a coat before he disappeared, or if he's out here somewhere as cold as I am. Maybe even colder, I think to myself, and I feel a horrible pang in my heart at the thought. If Baker was awake right now, he'd be worried sick about his brother. I have to find him.

An hour into my search and I begin to panic. The trees around me are all starting to look the same, and I start to realize how stupid of an idea this was. I didn't even tell anyone where I was going. And I took my mom's car. God, if I don't find him... if I do get lost out here... I'm going to be in so much trouble. My parents are already stressed to the max as they take care of their infant son, visit with their daughter's beaten boyfriend in the hospital, try to calm their brokenhearted daughter down, and search for Ian. I don't even want to think about what's going to happen if my mom wakes up and sees I'm missing now too. So I have to find him.

And just when I've about given up hope that I will, I see it. The vague outline of a small shack in the distance. My heart thrumming wildly in my chest, I run for it, pushing my way through the brush as I try to make it to the door without killing myself in the process. When I get to the shack, I don't even bother knocking. I just push the door open, shining my light into the small room. I know in an instant that this is the place. My light shines on the old dirty couch and small backup generator on the floor, and on the kitchen counter I see clean pots and pans from the last time Baker was here.

Wiping the cold sweat off my brow, I shine my light around the room, searching for any sign of the little boy. "Ian?" I call out desperately. "Ian, are you here? It's me. Summer."

The sound of quiet shuffling hits me from behind, and when I turn around, I see him hiding in a corner of the room. He's wearing jeans and a t-shirt, a dark blanket wrapped around his shoulders as he shivers in the dark. I run to him, shining the light on him so that I can check him for any damage. His face is dirty and tear streaked, and his hands have what look like red stains on them. Blood, maybe. Sitting beside him is his steel baseball bat that Baker bought for him for his birthday last year.

"Ian," I whisper, relieved to see he's okay. His storm gray eyes, so much like his older brother's, are wide and scared as he cries. "Hey, hey. Shh. It's okay."

"S-Summer," he says with a sniff, and my heart breaks. "Go away. Please."

I shake my head as I take a seat in front of him. There is no way in hell I'm leaving this shack without him. "Ian, everyone is looking for you. My dad has been driving around for hours. And the police... they want to talk—"

"They're going to arrest me," he cries, burying his face in his knees.

I place a gentle hand on his shaking shoulder. "Why would they arrest you? You didn't do anything, Ian."

He continues to sob into his legs as his body quivers with cold. "Is... is Baker okay?" he asks thickly. "Did someone find him? Is he alive? I don't know—"

I nod my head quickly. "Yes. Yes, we found him. He's alive. He's at the hospital." I don't tell him he's okay, because I don't want to lie to him. His brother is not okay, and we don't quite know how bad he actually is. "Ian," I say softly, brushing a strand of his dirty hair out of his puffy red eyes. "What happened?"

He sucks in a breath and he lifts his head to look at me. "I don't know. M-My dad... he was given these... these papers by someone. I-I don't know... who it was. I never saw him before. But when he read them, he... he got so mad. B-Baker was in the k-kitchen making breakfast. And my d-dad came in and starting sc-screaming at him. About m-me. Saying something about... about someone taking me away. A g-guardianship. B-Baker didn't know wh-what he meant. My dad threw the p-papers at him, and before B-Baker could even read them... he started hitting him."

My parents. The guardianship papers. I remember hearing my mom and dad say that they had guardianship over Ian now. Their dad must've been served, and that's what set him off. "Your dad starting hitting Baker?" I ask, and Ian nods.

"It was so b-bad, Summer," he says through his tears. "Worse than he's ev-ever done be-before. And I was sc-scared. I thought he'd... he'd ki-kill him. He pushed him into the living room, and he fell and hit his h-head on the table. He didn't come back up, but my dad ke-kept hitting and hitting, and I knew. He wa-wasn't going to st-top this time. So I... I hit him."

My brow furrows in confusion. "You hit Baker?" I ask.

He shakes his head. "N-No! I... I hit my d-dad. With... with this." He nudges his bat with his leg. "I just hit his shoulder, so he turned... and he started chasing me. Trying to take the bat. So... I got scared. And I ran into the kitchen. He tripped on the broken dishes. And I... I hit him again. Hard. He fell, and he didn't get up." He takes a large, shuddering breath as his eyes well up again. "I think I killed him, Summer. I think I k-k-killed my dad!"

He bursts into tears again as he throws his arms around me. I wrap mine around him and hold him to me, horrified by what he's just said. It was Ian. Ian killed their dad. "Ian, it's okay," I whisper in a desperate attempt to soothe him. "You're not going to jail for that. They aren't going to arrest you. What you did was called self-defense. You had a right to—"

But it's clear he's not hearing me. His cries are so loud, and he's clearly out of his mind with fear. So I sit there for a long time, holding him and letting him cry into my shoulder, sneaking a few tears of my own as I try to figure out what to do. After a while, he settles down enough to talk again. "I'm going to jail. I just know it."

"How do you know?" I ask softly.

He takes another shuddering breath. "He didn't get up. And he wasn't breathing. So I killed him, right? He's dead?"

I can't lie to him. Not when he's like this. "Yeah. Yeah, he's... he's dead." His face falls again.

"It's against the law to kill people," he explains, like I should know this. "So I'm going to jail, and I'm never going to get to see my brother or play baseball with your dad or play with Auggie again."

"No," I say firmly. "No, that is not true. It was self-defense, Ian. Your dad was going to hurt you. Kill you, maybe. And self-defense isn't murder. Not like how you're thinking." He bites his lip, like he's not sure whether or not to believe me. "Come home with me," I whisper. "I'll keep you safe. My parents... they're your guardians now."

He sniffles as he wipes his eyes with the back of his hand. "What's a guardian?"

I give him a soft smile. "It means they're taking care of you now. Kind of like your parents. It's their job, by law, to make sure you're safe. To protect you. To guard you for anyone who would try to do you harm. And you know them, Ian. They will protect you. They will fight for you. We all will. We love you. So no, you're not going to jail. I promise. Now please, please come home with me. Everyone is worried sick about you. My dad hasn't slept. He's been out looking for you for hours."

"I'm scared," he says. "I'm scared to leave this place."

I nod. "I know. But you have to face your fear. This is it, Ian. This is the worst it gets. From here on out, it'll be better. You'll see. But you have to leave this shack behind. You have to come home with me. You have to let my parents do their job. Can you do that?"

His lip quivers. "I won't go to jail?" he asks again, and I shake my head. "Can... can I see my brother, Summer? Please? I... I want to talk to him. I want him to tell me."

My heart cracks. "He... he can't tell you right now," I reply. "He's sleeping. And he's going to be sleeping for a while. But it'll help him get better. So right now... you're just going to have to trust me. Do you trust me?"

Those words. All the times Baker asked me and I gave in when I shouldn't have. When I should've spoken up and told someone about the abuse. I wish I would've. But now... now the words actually mean something right. I need Ian to trust me like he trusts his brother. I need him to come home with me. The boy sits and stares at the bat sitting next to him, as if he's replaying what happened in his head. I wonder how many times he's done this today. Then he closes his eyes, takes one last breath, and nods his head.

"Yeah," he whispers. "I trust you. Can you... just take me home?"

I smile and nod my head. "Yeah. I can take you home. I'm going to call my dad, okay? Let him know I found you." He nods, and I pull my phone out of my pocket, dialing my dad's number. It rings once before he picks up, and I can hear how frantic he sounds on the line.

"Summer," he says breathlessly, and he sounds so scared and tired. "What's up? Everything okay?"

"Dad, I found Ian," I say, cutting to the chase. I check the window and see the sun is coming up finally. "Go to the vacant lot out by Hayden Lake. You'll see mom's car sitting outside it. I'll meet you there."

He doesn't ask questions. "Okay, I'll be there in twenty minutes," he replies, and he hangs up the phone.

Iput it back in my pocket and smile down at Ian. "You ready?" I ask him, and henods his head. "Okay. Let's go home." I reach my hand down for him and help himup off the floor, and the two of us walk out of the shack together for the lasttime.

Author's Note:

Well, now we know what happened. What do you all think? Are you just devasted for Ian? And will Baker pull through? Let me know your thoughts in the comments! New chapter coming as soon as I can write it. Stay safe and healthy until then, my dears!
XOXO,
~Aly