I'm sorry it's been all angst lately but that's all i've had the motivation to write...
TW: suicide, intrusive thoughts
Please read the note at the end of this story!

So in this story, New York is under lockdown, schools are closed all of the shit is happening. This is just Peter trying to deal with it, something I'm sure many of us are struggling to do right now.

"Wake up kid you're gonna be late for school!" Tony said as he opened Peter's door. The kids room was a mess. He made a mental note to get him to clean it up later.

Peter opened his eyes and sighed. Another day that would feel the exact same as the past year. He sat up and smiled at his dad.

"Thanks for getting me up dad, I've got class soon so I'll come out for lunch." He replied with a fake happiness to his voice.

Tony nodded as he left his kids room. Peter got up and shut the door. He looked around his room to the pile of clothes that sat in the corner. No point changing out of pyjamas, it's not like he was going anywhere or seeing anyone.

He sat back down on the bed to check his phone. The same message appeared on his screen:
No new notifications

Peter wasn't surprised. He didn't talk to anyone anymore. What was the point it's not like he could go and see them. They were all preoccupied with their significant others anyways.

He walked into the bathroom and stared at his deep and dark under eye circles. Lately he didn't fall asleep until 2-5am, as it was the only time he was alone and had nothing expected of him. It was the only time he could get a break, and it felt like a waste to just sleep.

His attention was turned to his hair. It was a mess. He didn't bother brushing it, what was the point. He hadn't showered in a couple days either. He left the bathroom and pulled out his laptop.

He joined his call and leaned back in his chair. No one turned their cameras or microphones on. Peter didn't even recognize the names of anyone in his class. Even the teachers seemed fed up with everything.

"Alright everyone open the pdf file to page 34 and..."His voice was tired and boring. Peter decided to just tune him out. What was the point of listening anyways. His whole senior year was ruined, no prom, no graduation, no pre university things, just mountains of work that seemed to become even more pointless as assignment after assignment came in.

Before Peter knew it his call was finished. He had video lessons to watch now, and a few pages of practice work to complete. He sighed and started the work, barely putting in an effort because well... do I even need to say it again?

What was the point.

After a few hours of working he headed down to the kitchen to grab some lunch. He hadn't eaten yet and was sorta hungry. The second he walked into the kitchen he was bombarded by questions from his dads.

"How's school going Pete?" Steve asked as he sipped his coffee. Peter smiled.
"It's fine."

Tony checked his phone when it buzzed and gasped.
"Peter what the hell? I just got an email saying you're missing five assignments? Is this true?"

Peter looked down to the floor and nodded. It was too much work, he couldn't finish it. He tried to get an extension but the teacher refused since 'he was home everyday' and 'he had plenty of time to do it'.

Peter didn't intentionally ignore the work, he had already done eight assignments that week! He just wanted a break... no one seemed to understand that though.

"Fine you leave me no choice, no Spider-Man or lab time until you're caught up on your school work." Tony shrugged. Peter sighed, of course the only two things left he got minor enjoyment from were taken.

"I understand." He said quietly as he walked off. As he turned the corner his super hearing picked up something Steve said.

"I bet it's that damn phone."

Peter lost it. He ran to his room and slammed the door shut, letting the silent tears flow down his cheeks and the sobs wrack his body. He held a hand over his mouth so he wouldn't make a noise.

He pulled on his hair as he sunk to the floor, he was shaking and it felt like he could barely breathe. His hands were clammy and he couldn't seem to focus his eyesight.

Peter knew this was a panic attack. He just shut his eyes and waited for it to be over. They had only increased in frequency and intensity as the school year continued on.

He composed himself and sat down for another hour and a half of class.

Once the call was over he lazily finished up the work assigned to him that afternoon. He debated on doing his missing assignments but he was so tired.

He laid down onto his bed and pulled out his phone. It was the only thing that distracted him from the thoughts pounding through his head. The thoughts that nothing mattered anymore, and-and that maybe things would be better if he just ended it all...

Because what was even the point to life anymore.

School was too much.

He never talked to his friends anymore.

His parents didn't care about his well being, just his grades.

Nothing would ever go back to normal...

He was startled when Tony entered the room, fuming.
"For god sakes! Peter Stark I've had enough of this, give me your phone. All you do is sit around all day, do you not care about your future? Just do your goddamn work it's not that hard!"

Peter's eyes welled with tears and his throat closed shut. His leg began bouncing as the screaming caused the panic to rise.

He did his best to mask it and respond the only way he could without completely breaking down.
"I'm sorry."

Tony shook his head.
"Don't be sorry, just do better."
He said as he left, slamming the door shut.

Peter collapsed to the ground crying and shaking violently. He couldn't do anything right. He was a complete fuck up. Even his dad was sick of him.

He stumbled into the bathroom and looked into his eyes in the mirror. He saw a pathetic kid who couldn't handle what the world expected of him.

He knew what he had to do.

He scribbled some things down on a piece of paper and put it on his bed. He didn't look back as he opened the window and swung away with no shot since his dad took that away too.

He didn't even realize it but he had swung himself over to one of the tallest buildings in New York. Tears flowed down his cheeks as he slowly made his way towards the edge...

Tony felt terrible about how he lashed out on his kid. Truth is he was just really stressed out lately, this pandemic had been hard on everyone. He sighed and made his way back to his sons room to apologize.

He instantly panicked when he saw the window was open and he noticed a crumpled piece of paper on the bed. Tears filled his eyes as he read it:

Dear dad and pops,

I'm so sorry for disappointing you, I know I'm not good enough and you're sick of me. Truth is, I'm sick of me too. I don't have the motivation for anything. I try so hard in school everyday, yet it's never enough. I can't do this anymore I'm sorry. I give up. I don't want to live like this, I don't wanna live in a world where I let down the two people I look up to the most. I've hated myself for quite awhile now, but knowing that you guys do too tells me what needs to be done. I won't bother anyone anymore. I'm sorry I couldn't do better.

I love you,
Peter

Tony dropped to his knees unable to believe what he had just read. It didn't take long for him to call his suit and rush out the window.
"Fri where is he."

"He appears to be on the ledge of a building on 43rd street."

Tony's breath hitched and he flew as fast as he could to his kid, praying that he wasn't too late.

It was too late for Peter.

Nothing could be done to help him get through this. The thoughts in his head had won, and he was ready for the shit show that was his life to be over.

He would've sent Ned and MJ a text, but his phone was taken away. It didn't matter though, they didn't care about him anyways. He wasn't good enough for them, they deserved better.

He closed his eyes and embraced the feeling of the wind swirling around him. He took off his webshooters and crushed them with his strength. He wouldn't be needed those anymore.

He was ready to go.  He had failed life, and life had failed him. This was the end.

He was about to jump when the familiar sound of metal touching down on concrete filled his ears. He heard the broken voice of his dad.

"Pete, p-please come down, we-we can talk about this." He stuttered.

Peter turned around and smiled at his dad. It was a genuine smile for the first time in ages.
"I'm sorry dad, but there's nothing left to talk about."

He shut his eyes and it was as if time slowed down. The sounds of his fathers scream drowned out as the wind rushed in his ears.

He was falling.

Falling...

Falling...

And now he was free.

Tony screamed as he saw his son, his innocent son, dead on the ground beneath him.

The system had failed Peter.
The world had failed Peter.
But Peter wasn't the only one who was impacted this way by the current situation.

Ever since the beginning of the pandemic, teen suicide rates have risen by around 67%.

There was a big problem. The world was failing to support its young adults, ignoring the exponential increase in mental health issues, addictions and so much more.

Some have described it as a suicide pandemic, and something needs to be done. We need help, and someone needs to help us before it's too late.

Hi so this was a very suicide heavy chapter and I know how hard these times have been for everyone.

I know I'm just some random person on the internet, but I want you all to know I'm here for you if you ever need someone to talk to or anything else. Feel free to send me a message and I'd be happy to talk with you about pretty much anything.

It's said a lot but it's because it's true, suicide is never the answer. It's taken so many innocent lives already and I want all of you to know that even if you don't believe it there are people there for you, that care about you. And I'm one of them.

So please, feel free to reach out because you matter more than you think and things will get better, no matter how bad they seem right now.

Love you guys :)
~taco <3