(Lights on. Knockout enters the stage. The audience claps as he sits down)

KNOCKOUT: Welcome back! This week on the late night con show is our first autobot guest. Femmes and mechs, I give you the good doctor himself: Ratchet!

(Ratchet enters. He isn't smiling, but his waving suggests that he's fine with this. The audience claps. He sits.)

KNOCKOUT: Hello, Ratchet.

RATCHET: Um, hey there, Knockout.

KNOCKOUT: I'm just going to jump into it before you ask for your synthetic formula back! (Audience claps; Ratchet grimaces) T-Night asks, "What about Ratchet? Concerning his wrenches, does he have a favorite one and who does he like to throw them at? Does he have anything, anything at all, that he likes about the humans, like music or dancing?"

RATCHET: Well, I don't really have a favorite wrench. I'm always replacing them because I'm always throwing them. As for the second question, I don't like to throw my wrenches. It wastes them, as I said before. But I do enjoy hitting Bulkhead and Wheeljack on the head whenever I please. Any decepticon too. (Looks over to Knockout)

KNOCKOUT: (Rolls eyes) And your opinions on human culture?

RATCHET: Well, humans to have a good sense of both humor and music. I enjoy their classic music, brings a sense of home.

KNOCKOUT: Lovely questions, T-Night! Now wave goodbye! We'll see you next time with a very reckless wrecker!

RATCHET: It's Wheeljack, isn't it! Primus help us!

KNOCKOUT: (menacingly) Kill the lights, Soundwave!

(Lights out)