REY

Kylo Ren's warmth draws me in and I can't help myself, I let him pull me against him and rest my cheek against his chest. He's so warm. I close my eyes. He smells like the clean snow from the forest where we fought, a lifetime ago, and also like clothes warmed by the Jakku sun. It's the same soft scent that of the sheets I laid on, in the room I woke up in.

Kylo's hand rests on my back, warming me through. He wraps his other arm around my shoulders and I sigh, enclosed in his embrace like the child I saw on Jakku at the trading post, being held by his mother. Now I'm finally the one being held. And it's even more wonderful than I'd imagined, so much so that it frightens me.

I can't do this. I can't let Kylo Ren win. What did the Jedi texts say? Have no fellowship with the Dark Side? What fellowship does the Dark have with the Light? None. I can't give in to Kylo Ren's games. He'll trap me. He's the Supreme Leader of the First Order now. He's going to destroy everything in his path.

I hear Kylo's heart beat in his chest, his breathing, his sigh. Why is he holding me? Why am I letting him? But I know why I'm letting him. He knows it too. He made me say it out loud last time we were in a dream together. I need him. I'm only now realizing exactly how much I need him, like being without water for days in the desert, I'm endlessly thirsty. Except it hasn't been days but years, my entire life without this.

Suddenly Kylo grabs my shoulders in both his hands and pulls me away from him, keeping me at arm's length. A draft rushes in between us, leaving a cold absence where our bodies were touching. I shiver, the heat from his hand on my back now gone.

No... please.

"Rey," he says, but I can't look at him. Is he trying to make some kind of point by pulling away when I'd finally given in to him? A point about how much I need him?

"Let go of me," I say, although my body is screaming to be in his arms again.

"I was young in the Force once too," he says. I glance up to look at him. His eyes are on my lips now.

Breathe... breathe...

He wouldn't kiss me, would he? It's just a dream, he said it was. But it's still a shared dream. Would he kiss me just to feed the desire inside of me, so I'd be at his mercy? Is he that cruel?

"Don't," I say, my breath unsteady. He looks into my eyes. It's no use saying it, he can read my thoughts with the Force. He must be quite aware of what I'm feeling, of how much I need this from him. Yet he's teasing me, tormenting me. I close my eyes. I can't fight anymore. I'm always fighting. All my life I've fought.

Please... just hold me, I call out to him.

Kylo doesn't move and I open my eyes again.

"Rey," he says softly. "Tell me what you want."

I clench my fists, hating him for forcing me to say things out loud, when I know he can read my mind. I just told him what I wanted. I swallow hard as the embarrassment washes over me and tears sting my eyes. Why is he doing this to me?

"I hate you," I say, my bottom lip trembling. His expression turns cold and he lets me go.

Suddenly an invisible weight pushes me to the floor and my knees hit the hard surface. I put my arms out in front of me, to stop my fall, then cry out at the bend of my wrists. But the sound is drown out by the loud rushing of water crashing into the pool behind us and splashing up over the sides. It rushes forward, washing over my knees.

My beacon!

I stumble to my feet and splash through the shallow water, which retreats back into the pool, like an ocean wave.

My jacket is on the other side of the pool. It still has the necklace and beacon on it and glides forward towards the pool, getting sucked in.

"No!"

The jacket floats on the water in the pool for a moment, but the necklace and beacon slide off, dropping fast to the bottom. I jump in without thinking. My heart pounds too fast. I didn't take a big enough breath, before jumping in. Water rushes into my ears, muffling all sounds. I can't see which way is up or down, there are too many bubbles and I can't make out the bottom through the haze. I try to kick my legs, but they feel cramped. My chest feels cramped too.

Kylo, help.

A fear grips me. I might die. I can't die yet, not without knowing who my parents were for sure, not without telling Poe how much I appreciate him being there for me lately, and Finn and Leia too, not without meeting Temiri, Luke's grandson. The burning in my chest makes my head explode with pain. Then, everything goes black.

***

I hate him

It's my first thought when I wake. I take in a deep breath, then another. I'm breathing. I'm alive.

Of course I'm alive, it was only a dream. Kylo Ren would never hold me in his arms in real life. It probably wasn't even a shared dream, just something I made up in my head.

I sit up in the large bed. I recognize it. It's the same bed I woke up in when dreaming. Strange. Only this time I'm soaking wet.

The beacon!

I look around the room frantically but then see the tiny flashing indicator light from the bedside table. I grab the beacon and push the button. A moment later it lights up and I smile.

The light brightens the room and I see folded clothes set on the bedside table. I pick them up. A plain, black long sleeve shirt with a First Order insignia on the shoulder and a pair of black uniform pants. They're female clothes, my size. There are also new bandages for my arms. I sigh and set them down. There must be a washing room in these fancy quarters.

I walk beside the wall and when I get halfway down, a door slides open as I step in front of it. I learned the trick from BB-8, who couldn't tell where the doors were when they were set into the walls. she'd roll around until one eventually opened. White light pours out into the room. I look inside. It's a washroom, everything clean and sterile looking.

Inside I find everything I need; a shower washing station, soaps for my skin and hair, and cleansing tablets for my teeth for rinsing. I take care of all my needs and when I'm done I'm so refreshed I feel ready to face anything.

I glance down at my wet, dirty clothes on the washroom floor. I can't put them back on, not now that I feel so clean and refreshed. But I hate the thought of putting on First Order clothes. 

When I'm done, I notice a small folded fabric on a shelf near the small towels and pick it up. There's a fine lace across the top. It's an undergarment, soft and white. I guess it's for me. I put it on and look in the mirror. I look so different without my arm sleeve wrappings on and... shirtless. I quickly grab a towel and wrap it around me. I'm not used to seeing myself undressed in a mirror. I'll just have to wear the First Order clothes for now. Maybe there is a washing station for clothes and I can get my clothes cleaned and returned to me.

I step out of the washroom and look into the dark shadows of the bedroom. The door slides closed behind me and it takes a moment for my eyes to adjust. I find the clothes by the bedside and drop my towel to get dressed. The air in the room is cooler than in the washroom and a shiver runs through me, making me feel more exposed. Once I'm dressed, I'll go find Leia, and Poe. And Temiri.

---

KYLO

Kylo Ren squinted at the bright light flooding into his room. He'd fallen asleep in a chair while waiting for Rey to wake. She'd almost drown in the pool and passed out, trying to get a necklace that had fallen into the water. Kylo had the pool drained and the necklace returned to his quarters.

The washroom door slid closed and Kylo blinked into the dim shadows, his glance fell on Rey. She stood at the other end of the room, in a towel. Kylo sat up. She walked over to the bed and let her towel drop.

Kylo's breath caught at the sight of her in only a pair of small undergarments. She took the shirt he'd left for her on the bedside table and pulled it over her head. For a moment her arms got stuck as she wrestled with the shirt, stretching up in the air, her chest exposed, head covered by the shirt. Her body was silhouetted in the purple night lighting and Kylo's muscles tensed at the sight. He couldn't look away.

She finally lowered the shirt over her chest and finished getting dressed. She hadn't noticed him yet. He should have said something as soon as she came out of the washroom, but it had all happened so fast. He'd woken up and the next moment she was undressed and stretching in front of him.

Her sudden gasp of surprise when she noticed him, made him flinch. It was too late, she'd seen him.

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Author's Note: There's good news, and then there's bad news. The good news is that I'm going to keep working on this fan fiction!!! :D  The bad news is that I have to limit my posts to twice a week, maybe three. I can't keep up the pace I'm going and still be successful at life. Please keep checking back for updates. My commenters are like family to me. I'm going to miss you guys. If this was a paid job then maybe I could do this every day, but for now, life calls. I will post again in two days. The Force be with you all. And I'll see you all later this week <3