CHAPTER EIGHTEEN: Interview with a Shadow

Saturn sat upon his throne with entitled, regal poise. Although there was only Elizabeth and himself in the room, and he was in the process of trying to win her over, he simply couldn't help but assume a pose of authority. Elizabeth had taken an instant dislike to Saturn's arrogant mannerisms and she got up from her seat and she stood defiantly some distance from the god king. His gentle command for her to sit once again on the throne next to him went unheeded. She fixed him with a steely gaze that dared him to issue the command again. He was wise enough not to make that mistake.

Somewhere behind her, along the long corridor that led to the throne room, footsteps could be heard. Elizabeth did not turn around as the footsteps grew louder as the unseen company approached. Saturn stood up. He walked towards Elizabeth. He spoke quietly as he passed her.

"I will leave you to talk," said Saturn.

She turned as Saturn passed. A guard waited for Saturn by the doorway. As Saturn and the guard left the room the large doors closed. As the echo from the closing door reverberated around the throne room, Elizabeth was suddenly struck by a chill that reached her bones. The icy sensation thawed as quickly as it had formed. Elizabeth smiled widely as she rushed to greet the other Amy. The shadow girl was as real to her as the Amy back in her home city. If anything, the shadow Amy was even more real to her. She had known the shadow girl much longer than the other Amy, and it was thoughts of the shadow and her fate that had disturbed her sleep for many years. The queen engulfed the girl in a warm embrace. Amy almost lost her footing as Elizabeth squeezed her hard.

"My dear girl," said Elizabeth. "I cannot begin to apologise enough. What I did to you was simply unforgiveable. I have been the cause of much sorrow in this world, but the sorrow I have caused you is the only transgression that I truly regret."

She released Amy and then she took a few steps back to view the girl properly. What the queen saw pleased her enormously. She had expected Amy to be in a poor condition after years at the mercy of the demon. It was not so, and if anything, the shadow Amy looked much healthier and much stronger than the other Amy. It was a relief, but it was a relief that she couldn't quite accept as truth. The smile on the queen's face was wide and warm, but it was mere construct. Elizabeth's eyes scanned the girl's body for any signs of mistreatment, and then sheepishly she turned her gaze towards Amy's face in an effort to discern her state of mind. Amy did not appear angry. She did not appear happy. She just appeared to be the same Amy that she had always known—distant and thoughtful. It had been many lifetimes since Elizabeth had taken the child Amy from her father in a London museum. Many lifetimes for the demon to twist and corrupt the innocent child into a powerful weapon at his command. Many lifetimes since the demon bit into the teenage girl's neck and forced her to drink of its foul blood. Immortality as a poisoned gift from the demon was Elizabeth's choice and burden to bear; immortality for this Amy was a twisted punishment for the unwitting crimes and destiny of her other self.

"There is no need for you to apologise," said Amy. "I have been treated well. I have been introduced to a world that would have otherwise remained hidden to me. I have had a good life. In fact, I have had an amazing life."

"You are a dear girl to say so, but I robbed you of the life that you should have lived. The joys that you should have experienced. Your family, your friends. You never got the chance to grow into your own woman; to fall in love, to have your heart broken. I took that from you, and for that, I am truly sorry."

Amy smiled sympathetically.

"I have seen that other life. There have been times when I have lived that other life. I have lived as her. I can assure you; I have not missed out on anything. My existence has been glorious, and I would not change a single thing, even if it was within my power to do so. As for falling in love? I have done so many times, yet my heart was never broken. Please, think not of sorrow when you think of me, for you have given me a gift without equal, and for that I am eternally grateful."

Elizabeth shot Amy a look of concern. She had heard words such as these spoken before. Many had been directed at her, personally. They were words of fear; words of blind devotion; words of treachery. Elizabeth could not get a proper read on the shadow, but experience told her to be wary. She was also well aware that a judgement based purely on experience was likely to be flawed.

Amy walked across the room and she sat down confidently on Saturn's throne. It was a casual act of familiarity that astounded Elizabeth—if Amy feared him, or viewed him with blind reverence, would she be so bold as to take to his throne? Elizabeth did not know what to make of the small act of apparent disrespect. At one level the move comforted her a little—Amy didn't fear him; yet at another level the move terrified her—Amy didn't fear him, and she should. Was the shadow Amy so powerful that even the demon held no fear for her?

Elizabeth sat on the throne next to Amy; the one that she had so resolutely declined to accept when Saturn offered it to her for a second time. She turned to Amy and she spoke to her in low tone. The reassuring tone was intentional, as was the internal command to smile warmly, yet somehow in the jumble of emotions that Elizabeth was experiencing, the smile failed to materialise.

"Tell me truthfully; has he harmed you?" Elizabeth said, in a tone that was intended to bring comfort and get the girl to drop her guard, if only for a moment.

Amy smiled warmly.

"Honestly, he has been nothing but kind and honest. He has not treated me as a prisoner. He has not treated me as a servant. He has treated me as an equal. He has given me a glimpse into the very heart of creation. None of that would have been possible if you had not done what you did."

"And you believe that he has honestly told you what he has planned? The war that is to come? The death and destruction that he will bring to this world and to the world beyond? He has told you of these things?"

"He has."

"And you are fine with that?"

"I am. There is a much larger story being written here than men like John Dee and Patrick could ever truly comprehend, and as hard as it might be for you to understand, what he has planned is much better than what his brothers have in mind."

"You can understand why I have such a hard time accepting your words? If truly are you, then I do not believe that you would agree to his brutal plans. And just because he has planned something less terrible than his brothers, why should we meekly accept any of their plans? They are their kind, and we are our kind, and my fear is that you have forgotten that simple truth."

"That is where we see things differently, and we only see things differently because you have not had the complete story revealed to you. This is not his plan. This plan has been decided by a greater power. Holy men have foretold of this ending. The holy texts have laid bare the truth of it. He is a force of creation. Divinely inspired. The chaos that he will bring will set the universe free. Like a hurricane destroying a mighty, and corrupt city. Clearing all that is impure and leaving a foundation on which to build a new paradise. To call Saturn evil is to call the Creator of all, evil. Surely, after all you experienced once the veil finally dropped and the greater existence was revealed to you, there were questions that you had, and certainties that no longer held firm? What he offers is an opportunity to see everything. More than that; he offers you the opportunity to see everything and then to make up your own mind. Free will; the greatest of all gifts. His new paradise will rise from the ashes of the old universe, and we can be there with him as it does."

"It is the form of that paradise that worries me, Amy. And the cost. What right do any of us have to destroy what God has created, even if such a travesty was within our power?"

"If you would only listen to what he has to say, you will understand. As humans we can only guess at what God is and what He wants, but with enlightenment you can know and understand the answer to these questions."

"And if I don't understand? Or if I do understand and I don't like what I learn? What then? How does your Master deal with subversion?"

Amy smirked triumphantly.

"He will deal with your subversion with a lot more kindness than those who tried to subvert your will when you were queen were dealt with. Do not judge him by your own low standards, or let your own depravity prejudice your willingness to at least listen to what he has to say. He will not punish you, but you will be on the wrong side of the only war that ever truly mattered."

"And does he believe that his brothers will simply let him do as he wishes with all of creation? There is an entire civilisation in this land, and another beyond, and those are only two that I am aware of. For all we know there could be life across the wide expanse of the universe. The universe of man, and the pockets hidden within. Will his brothers really let him destroy everything?"

"No, they will not. That has also been foretold. They all have a vision for how this reality ends, and form there, what form the new reality will take. They are beings of great conviction and purity, and they have a role to play. This world will end. Our world will end. We cannot stop that, but we can help fashion what comes next."

"And what makes them wrong and him right?" asked Elizabeth, with desperation.

"That's the thing, Elizabeth. They are also right. Their idea of life ever after is just a valid as his. Just as pure. Just as wondrous."

"Then why do you choose him?"

"Simple. He tells the truth."

"And the others don't?"

"They tell their version of the truth. It is a belief, and nothing more. Yet the road to what they want is paved with broken bodies and destruction. Why do you believe in what they want? They have created a society much like our own. Kingdoms and war. Seedtime and harvest. Birth and death. Pomp and ceremony. Love and loss. If some of the brothers had their way, that way of life would continue forever. That was never the plan of the Almighty. There was always going to be an end, and a new beginning. It seems to me that Saturn is the only one truly committed to that certainty. And his brothers, with their fine kingdoms and false morality; did you ever stop to ask who actually built those gleaming cities? They simply didn't will them into existence. That is forbidden. No, their splendid civilisation was built by humans. Men, women and children enslaved to serve them. If you travel beyond the great kingdoms you will find the truth of their cruelty. There are countless towns and villages filled with human beings living in squalor and fear. Do you really believe that is better?"

Elizabeth paused before replying.

"In truth, I do not know what the brothers want. I have not witnessed the squalor of which you speak. It was my firm understanding that humans, pure human beings, could not live in this world? Whoever these slaves are, they are not truly human any more than we are true humans. Forcing such creatures into servitude is no more immoral than the use made of the underclasses to build my Empire when I was queen; and such servitude continues to this very day. It may be terrible, but it is how it has always been. That does not mean that what he wants is better. The brothers give these people life through service, whereas Saturn proposes to deny them of life entirely. So, tell me about his plans and how he means to see them through to fruition."

"It is simple. Wipe away the old Earth and replace it with something new. All the pleasure and wonder of what was, with none of the suffering and loss. No illness, or hunger, or death, or pain. Return Earth to its original state. A new heaven where all are free. A genuine paradise, open to all of his brothers and sisters."

"And ruled by him?"

"Ruled. That's not quite what he has in mind. He will ensure that all who live there do so with a pure heart and with a genuine belief in what he has brought about. But they will not be slaves. They will be free to live as they wish."

"As long as what they wish is in agreement with what he wants?" Elizabeth sneered. "And what if they don't agree?"

"Then they can leave."

"And what if they don't want to leave?"

"He will cast them out. It wouldn't be the first time that has happened."

"Sounds a lot like ruling to me. And more than that, Amy, it sounds like he is trying to set himself up as the new Creator. Those who do not conform to his will be cast out. They will become the fallen. And what of the people already on the Earth?"

Amy sighed.

"They had their time. They had their chance. Many chances. I have walked amongst them. I can see their true nature."

"And? What is it that you see? What is it about them that makes you so certain that they are unworthy?"

"I see nothing. Not good, not evil. Emptiness. Unfulfilled and meaningless. So caught up in their own material existence that they have lost sight of their divine nature."

Elizabeth smiled.

"I find that hard to believe," said Elizabeth. "True believers have always been, and will always be. Billions of human beings and you can't find a single true believer amongst them? Utter nonsense."

"You do not have to take my word for it. My other self is beginning to manifest her abilities. She can see what I see. Bring her back to the old world and ask her what she sees."

"I will," said Elizabeth, with mild menace.

The queen's tone lightened with the excitement of a knock-out point as she continued.

"And what about us? I mean; what about creatures that are half-human? Or the fragments, such as fairies and the like?"

"The old creatures have long left the realm of man. Most of them have, at any rate. They will remain unharmed as long as they stay in their sanctuary."

"Like animals in a menagerie?" asked Elizabeth, with mild alarm.

"That is how they have lived for many lifetimes. They have no interest in the world of man; the new world will also hold no interest to them. As for half-humans? I do not know the answer to that question. If you seek out the slaves beyond the kingdoms you can decide for yourself if they are worth saving."

Elizabeth snorted derisively.

"Perhaps he will give us our own private zoo in which to live out eternity," said Elizabeth.

"If we keep to his new order, he will find a place for us in his glorious kingdom. I am certain of it. He does not want conflict. Not with us, or with his brothers, or with the Almighty. He merely wants a paradise where his brothers and sisters can live in peace. Even those amongst them that were too cowardly to take his side in the first heavenly war. They will all find love in his new kingdom."

"It sounds like war to me."

"Not a war. Rebellion, perhaps, but not a war."

"And if God says no?"

"If God didn't want this to happen, He would have stopped Saturn a long time ago. Don't you see? This a rebellion for free will. What loving father would not want that for his children? What loving father would not feel pride that their children have grown to be independent and good?"

"What father would stand by and allow some of his children to murder billions of their brothers and sisters?"

Saturn stepped through a small doorway behind the thrones.

"Billions of bodies of matter will be destroyed, but their true form, that which makes them living and divine, will live on," said Saturn.

"Well," began Elizabeth. "It would seem that you have it all sorted out. Strange though that your brothers don't share your vision. Strange too is the feeling burning through my soul, screaming like a gale in my mind, that this is wrong. You have stepped out of your demonic skin to rule in your new eutopia. What about those corrupt creatures that cannot shed their damned nature with such ease?"

Saturn stood beside Elizabeth. He looked down at her, placed a hand on her shoulder, and he smiled warmly.

"There will be no place for them. The divine energy that turned lifeless matter into human beings, is limited; vampires and other base creatures need that energy to survive. Drinking blood is a means to that end. The spark within a human will sustain them for their lifetime, but vampires lose that spark when they die; before they become the undead. They need to constantly feed on the lifeforce of others to survive. When humanity is gone, then the creatures that rely on them to exist will also be gone. Well, most of them will be gone. You and Amy will live on. You will live by my side, reborn and free from the shameful thirst that sustains you presently. You will have almost as many rights as those of us born into the original paradise."

"Why only some rights?" asked Elizabeth, with suspicion.

Saturn grinned widely.

"My dear Elizabeth," Saturn began. "I chose you over millions for one clear reason. Your relentless ambition. You have fought against all the odds from childhood and you have survived. You have thrived. And here you stand. No other human being has ever been offered what I am offering you because there has never been another human like you."

"I sound like all kinds of wonderful," Elizabeth scoffed. "Yet you still haven't answered my question. Why only some rights?"

"You have answered your own question. No other being has questioned me when I have offered them a place in my new paradise. You do. The very ambition that brought you to my attention has the potential to destroy my world. You do not fear me. Without restrictions, your ambition would grow, and you would sow discontent. I don't blame you for that, as it is your nature, but I simply cannot allow it in the new creation. Your entry into paradise comes at a price. Give up some freedom, and bend your knee to my will, and you will live forever in a world like no other. You will walk across the face of the heavens. You will be able to transcend time and space at will. Everything will be possible."

"As long as I submit to your will? And your brothers? They will never submit to your will. Are you prepared to destroy them?"

"They have a choice. They have their own visions, and I respect and admire those visions. There will be a great war. It has been coming since the beginning of time. One vision will prevail."

"You don't sound convinced that your vision will win," said Elizabeth.

"I don't know if I will win, but the fact that I have come this far tells me that He is not concerned by what I intend to do. That alone gives me hope that my vision is just."

"You think that God will be happy with the murder of billions?" asked Elizabeth. "He who sent His Son to save mankind will simply stand by as you destroy them?

"Everything that has ever existed has done so at His command. Everything that has ever died has done so as His command. All pain and suffering and struggle and hopelessness; it has all come from Him. If I am wrong, then my vision will die in the crib."

"And joy and happiness and love," Elizabeth added, defensively. "You speak of all the ills that life has to offer but mention little of those things that make it all worthwhile."

"Those things were forced upon us. We had no more choice in them than we did with pain or sorrow," said Saturn. "In the new age we will choose for ourselves. We can pick joy and love and forgo all suffering. That is the difference."

"And what will you choose?" Elizabeth asked, knowingly.

"I do not take your meaning," said Saturn.

"Why did you rebel?" she asked. "If Heaven was perfect; why did you rebel? Surely this new Heaven is a mere shadow of what came before?"

"In Heaven we had peace. And joy. And eternity. An endless moment of peace and contentment," said Saturn.

"Sounds perfect," said Amy.

"Too perfect," said Elizabeth. "You craved conflict, and pain, and struggle, and death. Something to break the monotony of the eternal bliss. That is why you really rebelled."

"And that our Father allowed conflict means that He wants it. He too was bored with perfection," Saturn added.

"And you really believe that He will allow you to destroy humanity?" asked Elizabeth. "His most corrupt and rebellious children? There is no logic to your argument. That alone makes me suspicious. You have a greater plan, and until I know what that plan is, I will never agree to help you."

Saturn paused before answering.

"Time will tell," he said, simply.

Elizabeth stood up. Amy quickly followed her lead.

"I have a lot to think about," said Elizabeth. "As do you, demon. If you want me by your side, return to me with truth."

She walked down the steps of the throne platform onto the stone floor. Instantly, the blue granite floor turned black and shiny. Elizabeth stepped back up onto the platform. Saturn and Amy stood beside her. The black glass that was the floor began to move. It swirled and bubbled before settling. An image formed on the surface. Elizabeth gasped.

"What is this?" she asked, as she stared hard into his eyes.

"This is what is possible," said Saturn. "If you stand with me, you can do anything."

Elizabeth's gaze returned to the image. It was a scene from the past. It was the day of her mother's execution.

"You can step through this portal right now and save your mother. You can bring her back here to live in my new paradise," explained Saturn.

"Just like that?" asked Elizabeth, with scepticism. "I can completely change history, and there will be no consequences?"

Saturn grinned widely.

"History lives only in the minds of mankind. It no longer matters," Saturn added. "Save you mother now or lose her forever."

Elizabeth looked at the image on the floor, and then back at Saturn. She smartly raised a hand. A black cloak instantly covered her body. She pulled the hood of the cloak onto her head. As she raised her hand again, she was clutching a sword. Saturn grinned. Elizabeth slowly walked down the steps and she stepped into that other place, and time. 

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